Baby Gets Circumcised Against Family's Wishes - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 12:51 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Apparently all the moms posting worried about keeping their babies intact in the hospital had good reason to be concerned; unfortunately.
http://cbs4.com/local/South.Miami.Baby.2.1907271.html

mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#2 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:14 AM
 
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That's terrible. I can't imagine the stress that must be putting on the family and the emotional scar with being reminded about what happened to your son against your wishes. I hope one day the child will not harbour anger over it and will come to accept it (he can't be sheltered from the reason forever) but thankfully there are restoration techniques if he doesn't like it. But that's not the point, because he will grow up having to see he is different from his relatives because of a hospital screw up. I know if I had been cut for that reason I'd be upset today, even with financial compensation. And if it happened to my son, I'd be livid. If there's anything good to come out of this, it might be that hospitals make a lot more paperwork and a lot more hurdles to go through to get a child circ'd or just drop it, leaving it in the hands of clinics where at least mistakes like this cannot be made. We can only hope.
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#3 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:22 AM
 
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how sad! i will say i like that the hospital came right out and said sorry... that is huge of them. however it should have never happened! i feel so sorry for the family and the baby!!!

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#4 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:37 AM
 
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That is just awful. I had my first born, a son, in an American hospital and many friends and family warned me to tell everyone no circumcision, and to keep him with me when possible. I thought they were over-reacting at the time. Poor baby and parents.

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#5 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:42 AM
 
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That poor child. I will definitely share that.

BC Mum of four ('05, '07, '11 and 06/14!)     
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#6 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:08 AM
 
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Two things stick out at me from this sad story.

One is the awkward sentence construction of the journalist: "It turns out every man in Mario's family is uncircumcised." The phrase "it turns out" is generally used to express an unexpected fact; there is nothing strange about a Latin family in Miami not having a family tradition of circumcision. Second, "every man in Mario's family is uncircumcised" sounds creepy to me. Like they're all just awaiting their circumcisions. What's wrong with "Mario's family does not practice circumcision"?

The next thing is the hospital's icky apology. It comes across as, "Oops, but at least he got a really, really pretty circumcision! One of the best we've done!":

"The procedure itself was performed following appropriate surgical guidelines and the baby didn't have any complications. Nevertheless, we're all deeply sorry that this happened."

"We also immediately implemented new processes to ensure this mistake will not occur again."

Uh, better yet, why don't you just stop nontherapeutic circumcisions at your hospital? That way it's guaranteed this will never happen again. The hospital's insurance premiums and even doctors' insurance premiums may go down.
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#7 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:22 AM
 
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"The procedure itself was performed following appropriate surgical guidelines and the baby didn't have any complications. Nevertheless, we're all deeply sorry that this happened."

"We also immediately implemented new processes to ensure this mistake will not occur again."
Actually, appropriate surgical guidelines were not followed because his circumcision was not "authorized" by his parents. So that right there is false.
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#8 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:38 AM
 
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yup. ladies and gentlemen: if you are having a baby at a hospital ASSUME the worst COULD happen. take all precautions to prevent a hospital "mistake" like this from happening to your newborn. if possible, keep your baby with you at all times. be sure you do not sign a consent form while in labor. some people write "do not circumcise" on every hospital form. some people write it on their child's belly. tell every nurse and every doctor who comes in your room that you do not want him circumcised. repeat, repeat, repeat. if possible, follow your child any time he has to be taken away from your room for weight checks, heel pricks, whatever.

circumcision is serious business. protect your sons!!

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#9 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:52 AM
 
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Oh my. That poor family.

Midwife (CPM, LDM) and homeschooling mama to:
13yo ds   10yo dd  8yo ds and 6yo ds and 1yo ds  
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#10 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 07:36 AM
 
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I wonder what would happen if the hospital had accidently gotten patients mixed up and removed the boys arm...

Would a letter of apology suffice?

Oops, we removed his arm, but you know it was done well and according to all guidelines...

Regards
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#11 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 10:29 AM
 
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Originally Posted by brant31 View Post
Two things stick out at me from this sad story.

One is the awkward sentence construction of the journalist: "It turns out every man in Mario's family is uncircumcised." The phrase "it turns out" is generally used to express an unexpected fact; there is nothing strange about a Latin family in Miami not having a family tradition of circumcision. Second, "every man in Mario's family is uncircumcised" sounds creepy to me. Like they're all just awaiting their circumcisions. What's wrong with "Mario's family does not practice circumcision"?

The next thing is the hospital's icky apology. It comes across as, "Oops, but at least he got a really, really pretty circumcision! One of the best we've done!":

"The procedure itself was performed following appropriate surgical guidelines and the baby didn't have any complications. Nevertheless, we're all deeply sorry that this happened."

"We also immediately implemented new processes to ensure this mistake will not occur again."

Uh, better yet, why don't you just stop nontherapeutic circumcisions at your hospital? That way it's guaranteed this will never happen again. The hospital's insurance premiums and even doctors' insurance premiums may go down.
Yes, the journalist makes it sound like an aberration to be "uncircumcised", rather than how it should be: "all boys are born intact". Somehow they need to be educated to understand that intact is normal, circumcised is not.

Also, as Brant says, if hospitals would just stop offering circumcisions, and stop doing them, then mistakes like this would not happen and a lot more boys would get to keep the best part.
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#12 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 11:08 AM
 
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I'm sorry...we just accidentally amputated the baby's leg, but everything went fine and there are no complications...bet that would go over well...think the hospital could have gotten away with a little apology then?

Victim of Birth Rape & Coerced ribboncesarean.gifUnnecesareanribboncesarean.gif What makes people think they can cut up someone else's genitals? nocirc.gif
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#13 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 11:44 AM
 
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I've had nightmares about this sort of thing.

 
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#14 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 11:58 AM
 
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Horrific. And also complete incompetence on the part of the hospital staff. Heads need to roll ( figuratively speaking ).
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#15 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 12:43 PM
 
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Terrible. This poor family.

We wrote "no circ" on all ds1's and ds2's onesies and diapers while in the hospital. We also never let him out of our sight, not even for the newborn tests. I insisted on going with him to the nursery while they did them.

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#16 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:07 PM
 
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Wow. I am literally sick thinking about this. I was terrified of this happening to my twins when they were in the NICU. Thankfully they came home whole!

Is there any way to communicate with the authors about their language in the article? E,g, intact versus uncircumcised? Etc.

So sorry for this mama, daddy, and baby boy. I hope they get a big settlement!!
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#17 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:08 PM
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Terrible. This poor family.

We wrote "no circ" on all ds1's and ds2's onesies and diapers while in the hospital. We also never let him out of our sight, not even for the newborn tests. I insisted on going with him to the nursery while they did them.
Just wanted to mention that parents have the right to demand EVERYTHING (weighing, ped exams, etc) done in their room. The nurses may hate you for that extra hassle, but who cares. We've done that with both of our kids. So they never had to leave the room.
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#18 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:10 PM
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I'm sorry...we just accidentally amputated the baby's leg, but everything went fine and there are no complications...bet that would go over well...think the hospital could have gotten away with a little apology then?


That poor baby, that poor mama
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#19 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 01:12 PM
 
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I've had nightmares about this sort of thing.
Me too :-(

This is a tree on fire with love, but it's still scary since most people think love only looks like one thing instead of the whole world. *
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#20 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:05 PM
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I didn't like the "it's a family tradition to be uncircumcised" part of the article, either.

So a circ'd dad who didn't want his son circ'd would have less reason to be angry than an intact dad?

My dh is circ'd and would have been beyond livid if this had happened to our son.

"Our task is not to see the future, but to enable it."
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#21 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:19 PM
 
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Happened to a friend of my DS3. 6ish years ago. The nurse took him for hearing test and a ped check and brought his momma back a paper to sign. She looked at it and said No we are not circing She said the nurse dropped the paper and ran down the hall. She jumped out of bed and ran after her but it was to late. They were just finishing up and she SCREAMED at the doctor... His response was ... well its not not like I gave him the wrong medication..

She screamed you F'd with the WRONG Momma. < her FIL was a DR and her father a malpractice lawyer ) The DR tried to blame it on the nurse. Yes they filed and won an amount that she said he would have no problem going to college and grad school on.

When her 2nd baby was born she told her OB nurse and the baby never left the room for a second ( different hospital different state)

Jeana Christian momma to 4 sons Logan 18, Connor 15, Nathan 6, and bonus baby Jack 1
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#22 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:39 PM
 
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That is so, so sad.
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#23 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:43 PM
 
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I'd have totally flipped out screaming too if I was her. Holy moly, I don't even want to think what I'd do.
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#24 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 02:44 PM
 
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I've had nightmares about this sort of thing.
I had my second son at home .... partly so I would not be offered circ, partly so I would not have to worry about accidental circ. (also to reduce risk of c-section, duh. but the hospitals attempts to "sell" circ when DS1 was born was a big part of the decision.)
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#25 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 03:21 PM
 
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Sad thing and I just wonder how could they say Misread Consent Form because Why Did the Doctors Continue to Ask Her if she wanted her Son Circ Right there tells me they saw and knew she said NO .

So I believe they are lying about the misread consent form because Doctors have a habbit of continously asking them only When they say No .

So I believe they did it because they assumed it was needed to be done .
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#26 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 05:36 PM
 
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Man, I am sick about this. At first I thought, "why would a mother let her baby out of her sight?". Then I read about him being in the NICU and sometimes it's just not possible to be by your baby's side 24/7 when they're in the NICU. I had a plan with my husband that if my baby ever had to be separated from me that he was to go with the baby and leave me. I'm glad we never had to be separated in the hospital. It seemed like it was policy at our hospital to do all the tests in the room- it was never once suggested that DS be taken to the nursery.

I can only imagine how I would feel if I were his mother- betrayal certainly. Heartbroken. To know that something that was rightfully his was stolen by a doctor that couldn't take the time to 1) uphold his Hippocratic oath or 2) read a consent form must be enraging. I hope they can restore him when it's possible (I know very little about it) to give him back as much as can be of what was rightfully his.

Honestly if I were the mother I would ask as part of the lawsuit for that doctor to never again perform a circumcision. I'd probably be laughed out of court, but I'd ask for it.
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#27 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 05:49 PM
 
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wow. this makes my stomach sick. poor baby and family

mama to one '07 and one '09
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#28 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 06:17 PM
 
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"The procedure itself was performed following appropriate surgical guidelines and the baby didn't have any complications. ."
I highly doubt that a baby who is unstable enough to be in intensive care is high on their list as appropriate for circumcision. The baby was in the NICU for 10 days. They circed him on Day 8.

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#29 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 06:21 PM
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She screamed you F'd with the WRONG Momma. < her FIL was a DR and her father a malpractice lawyer ) The DR tried to blame it on the nurse. Yes they filed and won an amount that she said he would have no problem going to college and grad school on.
wow, makes me wonder how many times it happens to boys whose grandparents/parents aren't lawyers/doctors and their parents just drop the case. How sad. The doctor did f'd with a wrong family LOL. even with all the money won over it, it is still a tragedy . If this mama knows a lot about circ, I bet her heart breaks into a million peices every time she sees her son naked ...mine would and there is NO amount of money that would ease this greif and pain...all the money in the world would not...
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#30 of 95 Old 09-11-2010, 08:56 PM
 
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Just wanted to mention that parents have the right to demand EVERYTHING (weighing, ped exams, etc) done in their room. The nurses may hate you for that extra hassle, but who cares. We've done that with both of our kids. So they never had to leave the room.
That's the way it's automatically done here--at least in the hospital I was in. Nurses kept coming into the room and saying, "It's time for his hearing test" or "It's time to have him weighed again", and they would bring the equipment in, do it, and leave. I'm sure the NICU would be a different story though--well, harder for the mother to stay by the baby's side anyway.

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