day 3 of a pink/red "tip" - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 11 Old 10-15-2010, 11:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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***UPDATE BELOW***

DS is 13months. Has not discovered his penis yet, to my knowledge. During the bath/naked time, he's never pulled, touched, nada.
I've certainly never retracted! I don't really even touch it, except to wipe.

But today is day 3 of a very pink/red tip. Reading the other posts, it sounds like this is somewhat normal (so I haven't "done" anything, creams, doctor, etc.). But it's now day 3, and a weekend. At what point do you make an appointment? Should I be doing a bath with baking soda (recommended in another post)? Or is there anything else I can be doing at home?
Should I be alarmed at all?

He isn't showing any signs of pain... meaning, I haven't heard him cry or look irritated, connected to a then full diaper. And again, he's never touched it and certainly too young to vocalize anything.

TIA

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#2 of 11 Old 10-15-2010, 11:55 PM
 
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I'd put a little diaper cream on it. We liked Burt's Bees.

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#3 of 11 Old 10-16-2010, 10:52 PM
 
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We use cloth diapers and I have had this experience from time to time. If the redness is not connected to any pain or other discomfort, I assume it is just contact chafing, and go without diaper when possible.

Lanolin protects the skin from further irritation.

It could be a yeast overgrowth, too. If you have any acidophilus capsules you can sprinkle a little bit on te tip of the penis at each diaper change, to combat yeast.
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#4 of 11 Old 10-18-2010, 01:07 AM
 
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Wish I could be more help about the redness. . .but just had to say, "really? he's never grabbed it?" Maybe my DS is the weirdo and I need to post about that! Every time I change his dipe first thing he does is grab his penis. . .hmmm, I thought this was normal. ..
Anyway, hope you get the redness cleared up Jordan. I'd definitely do some diaper-free time if you can. That always helps any sort of irritation in the diaper area.

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#5 of 11 Old 10-21-2010, 01:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't know how to change the main title... but... it dawned on me that DS started "playcare" (daycare 3 days a week for 3 hrs) just when the irritation started. It took until this weekend to do the math on that (bad mommy!). I just never considered...

So today when I took him in, I asked the teacher, you don't retract him when you're changing his diaper do you?
She responded that she's only changed poopy diapers on him so he's normally messy and she's been taught to pull back on the penis a bit. She said she's knowledgeable about intact penises and doesn't feel like she's retracted him, but yet, she pulls back a bit to wipe the tip... to get to the tip.

WELL.... if you're getting to something under the foreskin, you're retracting!

I immediately flipped out and questioned her repeatedly - she swears that she didn't pull back far on the skin. And when she brought in her superior, they discussed at length that they don't retract, but to clean, they pull just a teeny bit to get to the tip.

Um... I know I've never "pulled back", whether a lot or a little or AT ALL on his penis. I wipe what I see. period.

So... it sounds like to me, now figuring in the perfect timing, that they've done something to cause the irritation? The irritation is gone, and I've made it 100% clear that they are not to touch his penis PERIOD. And they apologized and were totally nice and accommodating and really felt like they hadn't retracted him -- but....

what do you think?

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#6 of 11 Old 10-21-2010, 10:59 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JordanKX View Post
I don't know how to change the main title... but... it dawned on me that DS started "playcare" (daycare 3 days a week for 3 hrs) just when the irritation started. It took until this weekend to do the math on that (bad mommy!). I just never considered...

So today when I took him in, I asked the teacher, you don't retract him when you're changing his diaper do you?
She responded that she's only changed poopy diapers on him so he's normally messy and she's been taught to pull back on the penis a bit. She said she's knowledgeable about intact penises and doesn't feel like she's retracted him, but yet, she pulls back a bit to wipe the tip... to get to the tip.

WELL.... if you're getting to something under the foreskin, you're retracting!

I immediately flipped out and questioned her repeatedly - she swears that she didn't pull back far on the skin. And when she brought in her superior, they discussed at length that they don't retract, but to clean, they pull just a teeny bit to get to the tip.

Um... I know I've never "pulled back", whether a lot or a little or AT ALL on his penis. I wipe what I see. period.

So... it sounds like to me, now figuring in the perfect timing, that they've done something to cause the irritation? The irritation is gone, and I've made it 100% clear that they are not to touch his penis PERIOD. And they apologized and were totally nice and accommodating and really felt like they hadn't retracted him -- but....

what do you think?
Sounds like the cause to me.

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#7 of 11 Old 10-22-2010, 12:37 AM
 
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I don't know why they would be messing with the tip with a poopy diaper anyway. My sons are almost two and they have never gotten poop on the tips of their penises except each of them maybe once when they were tiny and had a blowout, and a couple of times when they had sever diarrhea. Under normal circumstances it doesn't go anywhere near the penis.

Anyway, it looks like you cleared up the mystery. I will be extra careful about this when my own boys start daycare.

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#8 of 11 Old 10-22-2010, 12:45 AM
 
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Yes what they did was retraction whether they say it is or not and given the timing of the redness I would say that it was at least partially to blame.

Any movement back toward the body no matter how small = retraction. I am glad you made it clear they where not to do it any more and hope they dont do it to other little boys.

 
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#9 of 11 Old 10-22-2010, 01:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crunchy Frog View Post
I will be extra careful about this when my own boys start daycare.
It just didn't even dawn on me to ask. Bad mommy! in some ways, but also... why would you touch Too Much on a penis anyway?
Today when I picked DS up (yes, he's still going there), the owner was there and I asked her about it. She said she'd heard the supervisors story and re-emphasized that they do not retract, that many of the children are intact and they do not pull back. BUT, when I said what the teacher had said about pulling back "just to get to the tip" cause it was dirty, her face fell.

She also started a rant on how, because they change diapers (unless poopy) at designated times, maybe he had been in a wet diaper for a long time and that's what caused the irritation.
Perhaps.
He's only there for a 3hr period, which is only one diaper change - which is because he has his morning poop - and I guess that counts for his one diaper change... maybe that is true. Except, he's never sitting in a hugely wet diaper when I pick him up in the morning.

Enyhoo... point is, ASK and TELL daycare providers. It didn't even occur to me to say something the first day. Well, whether they retracted or not, whether it was just caused by wet diapers, I'm not pleased. And I'll not make that mistake again with ANYONE who might potentially be coming into contact with his penis.

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#10 of 11 Old 10-29-2010, 02:54 PM
 
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Glad I read this thread! Still only a few weeks along with baby #1, but if it's a boy, I will definitely remember this for later.
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#11 of 11 Old 10-29-2010, 05:27 PM
 
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Hi, Mama! Sounds like you've figured out the cause of the red tip. I had three thoughts:

1. You might ask the owner/director of the daycare that SHE do all the diaper changes that your son requires, period. I have done that for our boys in our church nursery, since I believe them to be the only to intact boys there -- I just pulled aside the director of the nursery and said that I only wanted her to change them. She said no problem. In your case, this amounts to only three changes a week ... assuming you PAY for this daycare, I don't think they'll say no. In a few months, when you switch teachers, then re-consider.

2. As a reminder to someone else who might read this post now or later, many times (maybe even most times?) a little red tip is really nothing to worry about. It's similar to redness anywhere else in the diaper area ... sometimes you get a little redness, and it goes away in a few days. You can put diaper creme on it to soothe it, or aquaphor, or whatever you like at your house, but really -- most of the time, it's nothing to be worried about. Watch and wait; odds are it will go away on its own.

3. The "talk to your providers" thing goes beyond daycare, and should be a conversation with each and every person who will change your baby!! Every time we have a sitter, the first time she comes, *even if the babies are asleep already,* I always ask, "are you familiar with care of the intact penis?" Most have looked at me with total bewilderment at the use of "intact" -- I have to say, "they were not circ'd" to get any response at all. However, I always assume that they do not know, and I always confirm -- WIPE LIKE A FINGER, DO NOT PULL BACK UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Given that I am rarely away for very long when they will require a change, this is overkill. But I believe in safe rather than sorry.

Oh, and I also have a sheet of paper in with the diapers and wipes that says, "wipe like a finger, do not retract" etc. So even if they forget, there's a reminder.

Someday, this will be the norm, and special hypervigilence will not be required! But for now, in the US (or at least in Colorado) it is.

Good luck!!
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