Scared NOT to circ. - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 40 Old 01-19-2011, 05:18 AM
 
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I always thought I wanted my son circd but the universe had other plans.  When ds was born the dr basically said ds's penis was to small and we should wait a couple of months before we circd.  At 5 1/2 weeks old ds was diagnosed with kidney reflux and we were advised not to circ until the age of 2.  I did some research and realized it wasn't necessary.  Dh had an issue for a while that ds would be "different from the other guys in the locker room."  As ds approached age 2 we talked with his dr about it and b/c of his age he would have to be put out and it would be considered outpatient surgery.  That right there made me say no to circ.  If we have another boy he will be intact as well! 


 Yoga loving momma to DD, Eden Raine 8/04 , DS Brett Edwin 2/08, DS Brantley Albert 12/12 and wife for more than a decade to Jason 
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#32 of 40 Old 01-28-2011, 09:23 PM
 
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My sons weren't born yet when I first started posting here, and at the ages of 8 & 10, one's response to a woman last night elsewhere (when I asked him in exasperation, "What would you tell this woman, who insists that her kid is going to thank her one day for circumcising him?", was: "Woman, you're crazy.")

 

If I could post the expression of unbelieving disdain... Trust me. No kid wants to think about his mother having parts cut off his penis, unless she already has & he's got to use cognitive dissonance to stay sane (or she said she's sorry, & love conquers all). 

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#33 of 40 Old 01-28-2011, 09:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drs0410 View Post

I'm not trying to take over this post, but I was just curious about the number of intact boys many of you are seeing. I live in Texas and used to work in day cares off and on- mostly with infants and toddlers. Hardly any boy I changed was intact. There's only one intact boy I can remember, and his dad was originally from France. The last time I worked in day care was 2007. Do you all think it has changed much in just the past few years?


I grew up in Texas and never came across an intact penis.  Not once.  Then when I had my first child, I went to an OB and he said the circ rate at his practice was 95% and then tried to bully my SIL into circ'ing by telling her that 'only the people coming from Mexico don't circ.'  Like she (and the baby) would be outcasts or something.  Thankfully she wasn't the least bit influenced by that and has had zero problems (I had girls!).  I do think the attitude is changing a bit, but I would guess that of people I knew back there, the circ rate is still probably 95%.


Andrea fly-by-nursing2.gif - Mommy to DD1 ('05), DD2 ('08), DD3 (6/17/11) cd.gif homebirth.jpg

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#34 of 40 Old 01-29-2011, 04:30 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amaayeh View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by drs0410 View Post

I'm not trying to take over this post, but I was just curious about the number of intact boys many of you are seeing. I live in Texas and used to work in day cares off and on- mostly with infants and toddlers. Hardly any boy I changed was intact. There's only one intact boy I can remember, and his dad was originally from France. The last time I worked in day care was 2007. Do you all think it has changed much in just the past few years?


I grew up in Texas and never came across an intact penis.  Not once.  Then when I had my first child, I went to an OB and he said the circ rate at his practice was 95% and then tried to bully my SIL into circ'ing by telling her that 'only the people coming from Mexico don't circ.'  Like she (and the baby) would be outcasts or something.  Thankfully she wasn't the least bit influenced by that and has had zero problems (I had girls!).  I do think the attitude is changing a bit, but I would guess that of people I knew back there, the circ rate is still probably 95%.



"by telling her that 'only the people coming from Mexico don't circ.' "  talk about toally unprofessional and highly biased....

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#35 of 40 Old 01-29-2011, 09:03 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amaayeh View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by drs0410 View Post

I'm not trying to take over this post, but I was just curious about the number of intact boys many of you are seeing. I live in Texas and used to work in day cares off and on- mostly with infants and toddlers. Hardly any boy I changed was intact. There's only one intact boy I can remember, and his dad was originally from France. The last time I worked in day care was 2007. Do you all think it has changed much in just the past few years?


I grew up in Texas and never came across an intact penis.  Not once.  Then when I had my first child, I went to an OB and he said the circ rate at his practice was 95% and then tried to bully my SIL into circ'ing by telling her that 'only the people coming from Mexico don't circ.'  Like she (and the baby) would be outcasts or something.  Thankfully she wasn't the least bit influenced by that and has had zero problems (I had girls!).  I do think the attitude is changing a bit, but I would guess that of people I knew back there, the circ rate is still probably 95%.


It's a shame your SIL didn't think to ask if he could recommend any OBs from Mexico, so she could go to a doc who would respect her choices.


It's such a relief to finally trust yourself.
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#36 of 40 Old 01-29-2011, 04:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by raelize View Post

i imagine a bigger problem could be that your circ'd boys grow up and ask why you inflicted it upon them but not on their brother.  why was he the special one?



It's not difficult to have an age appropriate circumcision talk, I don't think. 


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#37 of 40 Old 01-29-2011, 06:48 PM
 
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Yes, this OB was extremely biased and inappropriate and was the entire reason I went from OB care to a midwife.  Thinking of him makes my skin crawl.


Andrea fly-by-nursing2.gif - Mommy to DD1 ('05), DD2 ('08), DD3 (6/17/11) cd.gif homebirth.jpg

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#38 of 40 Old 01-30-2011, 07:51 AM
 
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Put it this way:  How would you feel if YOU were surrounded by women who were circ'd and you were not?  Don't your genitals feel normal to you?  Can you even imagine yourself saying, "gee, I wish I didn't have a clitoris like my sisters and mother"  You KNOW the benefits of your clitoris, just as your son will know the benefits of his foreskin.

 

I have two ds's 11- and 15 years old.  Both very involved in sports and locker rooms.  No issues at all.  Although I live in a high circ rate area, over the years I have found that there are at least 7 boys who are intact with a one mile range from our house.  Who knows how many others there are.

 

Feel confident that you are doing the right thing and that your boy(s) will be fine.  It will be normal for them.

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#39 of 40 Old 02-01-2011, 06:44 AM
 
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10 years ago, before I was pg with my first, our province actually used to cover circumcision under the provincial health care plan.  It gave me the impression that it was necessary, almost like...it had to be done.  silly, I know.  I'd never even heard of anyone being left au natural.  But after I got pg something spurred me to do my research and once I saw what the procedure actually involved I was horrified and immediately decided hell would freeze over before I would allow anyone to do that to my son- even my dh- good for him he agreed with me once I made him watch the video! ;)  All of my friends that have had boys since I had mine, circ'd their sons.  My brother planned on circing his sons due to being given false info from a nurse friend of theirs, I gave him a letter full of real info and stats the day his son was born and they gladly changed their mind!  I don't feel the least bit sorry for my sons- I feel very PROUD of myself for actually making an informed decision in the best interest of my child, and I feel HAPPY for them that they were spared from such a barbaric custom.  Since they were born it has been a total non issue.  I was surprised by how normal, whole and even cute it looked! :P  No one notices (actually wish more would so it could open a dialogue) or says anything, my doctor is British and very pro intact, and I don't worry at all how my boys will fare in a pro circ culture, which is actually quickly becoming more 50/50 what with immigration and the fact that our province no longer covers RIC.  I'm sure that the #'s outside my social circle or far more even, I am a conservative Christian and it seems to be taking longer to take hold in my circle, for some reason.  Try to change your thinking- be PROUD not to circ.  I teach my boys to be proud and accepting of who they are, not in a cocky way, but in a way that will hopefully equip them to stand up to peer pressure and conformity.  What kind of message do we send to our children when we put them through a brutal cosmetic surgery so that one day they may not get made fun of?  What if it were their skin color they were getting picked on for?  Be proud of yourself for making the best decision for your son, don't let ANYone talk down at you for your choice, arm yourself with info and be proud and happy about this!  (and make sure you educate any family members that may be changing his diapers that he is to be wiped off like a finger- no matter what!!!- because forced retraction can cause painful adhesions and scarring- if they are disgusted by your son's natural body I wouldn't let them ever change his diaper)


Jewels & Jon (Married 11+ yrs)- Homeschooling, No Circ, BF, CD Mama to:
Alex 8 Gabby 6 (Homeborn!) Gideon 2.... chickens, ducks, cats and a dog
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#40 of 40 Old 02-01-2011, 09:28 AM
 
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Originally Posted by MrsJewelsRae View Post

which is actually quickly becoming more 50/50 what with immigration and the fact that our province no longer covers RIC.



Most of Canada is well below 50/50 only Alberta (44%) and Ontario (43%) are close.  These numbers are taken from a phone survey about maternity experiences done in 2006.  Other statistics that put Canada at 9% (2005) look at only those done in hospital.  I haven't seen any more recent statistics.  Circumcision hasn't been paid for unless medically necessary in Canada since 1996 I believe, I couldn't find an exact date or when It changed in each province.  But the majority stopped paying between 1994 and 1996.


Wife to DH, Mom to my Intact Boys DS1: Born 02 Pain Med Free Hospital Birth, BF'ed for 9 Months, Partially Vax'd DS2: Born 06 via UC, BF'ed 3 years 10 months, and UnVax'd
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