Poor Little Boy - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 09-22-2011, 07:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My DC's babysitter has a foster son who is turning 6 at the end of the month.  He has down syndrome, a heart defect (for which he's had multiple surgeries), asthma, hearing problems, and is not toilet trained - in addition to a slew of allergies and other problems.  He has been in the foster system since he was born.  Well his birth mother decided he needed to get circ'ed due to "religious beliefs" - even though they are Catholic.

 

He went in yesterday for the surgery and is STILL in the hospital now due to complications - breathing problems, and such due to this surgery.  He is very uncomfortable too.

 

I just feel so bad for him.  He's a great kid and shouldn't of had to go through this for no reason, especially since he's already been through so much and had so many other surgeries.  And even though the birth mother wanted this, its his foster mom that has to go through this with him and take care of him, and see him in distress.

 

Its sad that the birth mom thought even at 6 yrs old this boy needed this done - even though his pediatrician said it wasn't necessary. 


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#2 of 10 Old 09-22-2011, 10:52 AM
 
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What is worse, IMO, than what this "mother," wanted for her child, is that she found a doctor who would follow through, in spite of clear contraindications (is this a word? I think this is correct), w/ an elective procedure.  I'm actually quite surprised in these law suit crazy days, that a doctor would perform elective surgery on such a fragile patient.  That, IMO, is far more sick than what this "parent," desired for her child, one that she does not even care for.  Why, is that okay too?  I didn't know that the biological parents still make the medical & elective decisions for their children in foster care.  Craziness all around.

 

Yes, poor little boy indeed.   greensad.gif

 

Sus


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#3 of 10 Old 09-22-2011, 01:33 PM
 
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That is messed up.  My DD is medically fragile and we only put her under GA if it is absolutely necessary or if the benefits of the procedure will improve her quality of life.  We recently struggled with the decision to do a follow-up MRI and to have work done on her salivary glands.  We did both and I'm glad we did.  And thankfully she did NOT have any issues.  But she had a collapsed lung when we had her g-tube placed when she was 3 weeks old.  I've seen it go both ways.  If I told her doctor tomorrow that I wanted something totally elective done under GA he'd probably think I'd gone crazy.

 

Poor little guy. :-(

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#4 of 10 Old 09-28-2011, 08:40 PM
 
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I wonder if they used the fact that he is not potty trained as a reason to do the surgery?


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#5 of 10 Old 09-29-2011, 04:58 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TyrantOfTheWeek View Post

I wonder if they used the fact that he is not potty trained as a reason to do the surgery?



I've never heard this reason before.  Would you elaborate, please?  

 

Thanks,

Sus


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#6 of 10 Old 09-29-2011, 07:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I"m not sure...

 

But I know he's had a few infections.  However, I believe he's had the infections because they have been forcefully retracting him for some time now.


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#7 of 10 Old 09-29-2011, 07:42 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Greenlea View Post

I"m not sure...

 

But I know he's had a few infections.  However, I believe he's had the infections because they have been forcefully retracting him for some time now.



that's even more sad.  (I tried to find & post the crying smilie, but the reply box closed when the smilie face came up :-(.  I want the old MDC back <bowing head>.)

 

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#8 of 10 Old 09-29-2011, 08:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama24-7 View Post

I've never heard this reason before.  Would you elaborate, please?  

 

Thanks,

Sus



Me either. I just know that some people will use any reason they can to justify doing this.


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#9 of 10 Old 09-29-2011, 08:33 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Greenlea View Post

I"m not sure...

 

But I know he's had a few infections.  However, I believe he's had the infections because they have been forcefully retracting him for some time now.



I bet that is the reason they did it. A mentally handicapped child can't possibly learn how to take care of his own penis. *eyeroll*

So sad and sick. I hope his recovery goes ok.


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#10 of 10 Old 10-06-2011, 07:36 AM
 
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I agree that it would have had to be somehow decided to be medically necessary.  The biological mother doesn't have the ability to decide on elective surgery for her son if he's in foster care.


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