Please help me protect my nephew! - Mothering Forums

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Old 09-23-2005, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi,
My step sister had a baby boy 2 wks ago and they have not circ'd him yet but she just told my mom that his circ is scheduled for next wedn. Please tell me the best links and the best video to get her and her boyfriend to change their minds? The only reason they have is because her boyfriend is. I am sick over this and need to make sure they do not circ him! TIA

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Old 09-23-2005, 04:09 PM
 
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Oh Yikes

Can you link them to the regret thread here?

There are some other great sites which I should keep for easy reference but do not. I am sure others will quickly come to the call.

How great that you will step in to inform them.

If humor works, I will find the link to a picture of a baby altered to give him hair on his chest, a tatoo, and generally adult aspects with "What if I don't want to look like daddy?" written underneath.

Did they originally plan not to circ and then change their minds?

Good Luck

PS nocirc has great site
and here is one for new fathers http://noharmm.org/appeal.htm
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Old 09-23-2005, 04:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks so much for your help!

I guess they always planned on circ'ing but the baby was sickly after he was born so they waited a little while. I was hoping if they waited it would never happen, but I guess I was wrong I am soo angry and sad right now, I am not sure if I could keep my cool if she was standing in front of me!

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Old 09-23-2005, 04:57 PM
 
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Julie, I'm so sorry. I recently went through this with my SIL (thankfully they had a girl).

When she said they would circ a boy, I reminded her that they don't HAVE to, that it is simply cosmetic surgery. I said "You hope and pray for 9 months to have a healthy, perfect baby that doesn't require any invasive medical treatment. If you're lucky enough to get that, why would you want to sign your baby up for elective surgery?"

I think most people don't really understand that it IS an operation, not "just a snip".

It didn't look as though I was going to talk her out of it that easily, so I said "OK, if you insist on having this done, at least make sure you know something about it first.

Make sure the baby first gets EMLA cream, and that they wait long enough for it to take effect. Then make sure he gets either a dorsal penile nerck block or a ring block, and make sure they wait long enough for THAT to take effect. Of course that doesn't eliminate the pain, it only reduces it, so have plenty of infant Tylenol on hand. Be sure to be with your baby the whole time, because he's going to be scared and in pain, and he'll need his Mommy, especially when they tear his foreskin from the glans.

After the surgery, keep a close watch for infection and bleeding. Babies can't tolerate very much blood loss, so even a little bleeding can be too much.

Most doctors today try to perform a "loose" circumcision, to leave enough foreskin for the boy to grow into. This remaining foreskin often tries to re-heal itself back onto the glans, forming adhesion. Usually these are not a problem and should be left alone to resolve themselves (which may take months or years). If adhesions form along the scar line, he may need another operation to fix them. Watch closely for signs of meatal stenosis, which is a narrowing of the opening to the urethra, caused by irritation, since the foreskin is no longer there to protect the glans. If it is severe enough to restrict urine flow, he may need another operation to correct it."


Hopefully, by this time she will realize that maybe she doesn't know as much about the operation as she should, and will either ask questions or run screaming for the phone to cancel the appointment!

Good luck to you, and please remember, evevn if they DO decide to circ you nephew, you will know that you did everything that you could do to stop it - and to make sure that he got the best possible pain relief.

If the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

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Old 09-23-2005, 06:23 PM
 
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Check out the links in my signature - I love them! Also check out www.intact.ca for the video (graphic).

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Old 09-23-2005, 06:36 PM
 
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If she can get through the circumcision video and still want to do it, send her a link to the sticky "Do you regret circumcising your son." Also look through the "Web Resources" stickey.




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Old 09-24-2005, 08:14 AM
 
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This is a link to one of my "new" favorite articles...might be a good one for your sister & her boyfriend to read. It was originally published in Men's Health Magazine. The thing I especially like about it is how graphic the pictures are - people can really see what goes on behind typically closed doors.

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Old 09-24-2005, 10:34 PM
 
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I hate to say this but prepare yourself for the fact that they may do it anyway . I just had another nephew that was circed. I gave them all the info before they had their first son and for some reason they felt it was something they needed to do. I am heartsick for both of my sweet nephews but untimitely there was nothing I could say or do to make a difference. I hope your experience is better.
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