What reaction/s did you get? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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Old 05-12-2006, 03:10 PM
 
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I have not had a son, or any child, as of today but I was once offered a circumcision, the opening shot being "Many patients prefer just to..."

When I declined the specialist nodded and moved on to offering me a simple prepuplastory. I was glad that he had not pressured me but if a simpler and less radical alternative not involving amputation of an erogenous zone exists then why was I not offered that first?!

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Old 05-12-2006, 03:16 PM
 
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No comments here of doctors or when my son was born.

I didn't even get asked or any paperwork if I wanted my son to be circ and I just said "no circumcision" no phews and no trying to get talk into it.

Well, my son was born in california and we changed peds because we moved to montana. I went with the dr. who was my ped and he was the one who circed my brother who is now getting more intact boys in there.
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Old 05-12-2006, 03:26 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boingo82
Strange look, followed by asking 5 more times over the end of the appt and the next two. Followed by telling me "it's not like you can let HIM decide." OH...ISN'T IT?
did you reply with "you're a god****** idiot" and walk out?

~Nay

Reneé, 34 year old mom to Antonin 8/04 and Arianna 9/06  (6 weeks) 5/08. Married to Matt since 6/03 .  
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Old 05-12-2006, 03:54 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Revamp
I was once offered a circumcision, the opening shot being "Many patients prefer just to..."

When I declined the specialist nodded and moved on to offering me a simple prepuplastory. I was glad that he had not pressured me but if a simpler and less radical alternative not involving amputation of an erogenous zone exists then why was I not offered that first?!

:
That's the problem in a nutshell. The thing is that the doctor may not have been aware of his bias. I think this is often very common- medical professionals are so careful to not offend people (example: circumcision, feeding choices, birth choices) that the less 'healthy' options (leaving intact, breastfeeding, natural birth) are not being advocated. And won't be untill they are more widely accepted/mainstream.

My best friend (a pediatrician) made a HUGE impression on me when she mentioned that her choice of natural birth was really just because doing 'nothing' was the healthiest from a medical standpoint. Untill she made that comment I thought she was crazy and the near painless birth she talked about was all in her head (forgetting about pain after the baby comes, as so many people like to say).

I hope I can get the guts up to repeat her words back to her when I talk to her about her upcoming birth #2 to a boy. She's pro-intact but dh wanted to circ with dd, and when they found out she was a girl they stopped talking.

Jessica

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Old 05-12-2006, 04:01 PM
 
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No one asked, it was on our birth plan so they all knew. But my OB did make a joke. He had to come to deliver on his day off, as we fired the on-call SOB during labor (that's another thread) so the OB we liked was called in from taking patients in the office to come deliver. When we were thanking him for coming to the hospital when he did not really have to he said, "Now you guys aren't circ'ing right? Cause tomorrow is my day off. " He came by the next day anyway just to check in on us.

My MIL, didn't really have much to say. A little defensive since DP is circ'd. My SIL praised us, her DH bullied her into circ'ing our nephew.
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Old 05-12-2006, 04:11 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jessjgh1
That's the problem in a nutshell. The thing is that the doctor may not have been aware of his bias. I think this is often very common- medical professionals are so careful to not offend people (example: circumcision, feeding choices, birth choices) that the less 'healthy' options (leaving intact, breastfeeding, natural birth) are not being advocated. And won't be untill they are more widely accepted/mainstream.
It just seems absurd that their role is to heal and they offer harmful operations in such a primary fashion!

As it turned out I did not need a prepuplastory at all, I did not even end up using any medication!
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Old 05-12-2006, 06:15 PM
 
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My FP asked if we would be circing when I was pregnent, I said no, he said ok. That was it. We had it in our birth plan and not one person at the hospital ever asked us about it. No one gave us any crap about anything in fact, we roomed in, the baby was always in bed with me, we didn't vaccinate, and we never ever let him out of our sight. The nurses seemed happy they had one less baby to think about.
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Old 05-12-2006, 06:56 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AntoninBeGonin
did you reply with "you're a god****** idiot" and walk out?

~Nay
No, I was an uncertain new mother who is afraid of confrontation. We just didn't go back to that ped (or any ped) for 2 years. We actually took Blake to a new ped this morning, who is seeing our newborn also.
When the new ped took off the nb's diaper, he said, "Now, do you keep your boys uncircumcised?" We said yes. He said, "Good, we have both kinds in my family. You just need to know not to pull this skin back, just wipe the outside like it's an elbow or something."
This ped says he encourages vaccinating, but if we choose not to (we do), he just says he'll provide additional information if we want but it's our choice and he won't argue.
At Blake's checkup, he is 80% for height and 13% for weight - and the pediatrician just said he looks tall and healthy. We are keeping this one!
Oh - also, our new pediatrician bikes to work to stick it to the gas companies. Most people are unwilling to do anything but complain about gas prices, but he is actually DOING something. He said he's cut his fuel consumption to around 30% of what it was. We really like him.
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Old 05-12-2006, 07:28 PM
 
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Wow boingo82, i love to hear about awesome docs!

When ds was born the OB just nodded and said "Fine"-- no real reaction. The 2 nurses were like "Oh. GOOD!"
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Old 05-12-2006, 09:06 PM
 
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We were only 80% sure that DD was a girl, so when they asked about a circ consent form, I said I wouldn't circ even if the u/s was wrong and the nurse commended me and said she was against circ.

With DS, when the question was asked during the pre-admission appointment, I said absolutely no to circ and the nurse said she was glad, that it was so much better for the little ones, but that they weren't allowed to say that to parents who planned to have it done.

DS was born 4 weeks early and had to spend a few days in the hospital. The night before the discharge I had a bad dream that DS would be circ'd without my consent (I had been reading a Mothering issue with a special report about circ.) So I told the ped an enthusiastic, "NO!" when he came in to ask if we wanted to circ that morning. His reaction was just to mumble, "Well I guess that'll make the discharge a little easier."
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Old 05-12-2006, 10:18 PM
 
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I'm just very saddened that a thread like this is even needed. I know that custom, tradition and so on can exert huge pressures in an insular society, but isn't it something of an anomaly that a developed country like the USA is so immersed in cultural normacly that it ignores the example of every other developed nation, regarding RIC?

In England, the hospital maternity wards have no such consent forms - the very idea would be viewed as ludicrous. Inexperienced parents (both mums and dads) are offered instruction in nappy changing and bathing... and that's that. Circumcision isn't considered for a fleeting moment.

It's easy for us, you see?

Little wonder, then, that I applaud those Americans with the vision and courage to look beyond the confines of tradition and 'bite the bullet'.

Christopher

Education is the discovery of our own ignorance. Will Durant

 

"You give a little love and it all comes back to you....

You know you gonna be remembered for the things you say and do."

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Old 05-12-2006, 11:39 PM
 
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There was no form for us to sign, as far as I know our hospital doesn't do circs. The day after his birth my Dr. came to check on us and asked. I said something along the lines of "No, we have no reason too religious or otherwise." and all he had to say to that was just let him know if we changed our minds and that after 10 days ( I think) we would have to go to a specialist because he wouldn't do it. We did on the other hand get a short lecture on vaccines when he found out I had signed the waiver form on the birth does of Hep B. We never did well baby checks so I don't know how knowledgeable he was on intact care.

:
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Old 05-13-2006, 08:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by krissi
DS was born 4 weeks early and had to spend a few days in the hospital. The night before the discharge I had a bad dream that DS would be circ'd without my consent (I had been reading a Mothering issue with a special report about circ.) So I told the ped an enthusiastic, "NO!" when he came in to ask if we wanted to circ that morning. His reaction was just to mumble, "Well I guess that'll make the discharge a little easier."
LOL!

I second what Islay said though, hopefully soon enough America will adopt the same system!
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Old 05-13-2006, 09:40 AM
 
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Our midwife never even brought it up. And our Jewish pediatrician said, "And you're not planning to circumcise him, are you?" "No, definintely not." "Oh good."

- Krista

milk donation : mother to Ryan (6), AJ (5), Nate (2), Maia (1) all born at home, I have a kid-friendly food & bento blog, : :
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Old 05-13-2006, 10:47 AM
 
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Originally Posted by veganf
Our midwife never even brought it up. And our Jewish pediatrician said, "And you're not planning to circumcise him, are you?" "No, definintely not." "Oh good."
Is she a reformist or reconstructionist Jew?
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Old 05-13-2006, 12:31 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Revamp
Is she a reformist or reconstructionist Jew?
I have no idea, I've never asked. We're not Jewish, or anything for that matter, we just chose her as our pediatrician based on what kind of care we wanted for our children: both an M.D. and an alternative care provider (she usually prescribes homeopathy first).
I've never asked her if her own son was circ'd, because I don't think it's appropriate to ask, but I have wondered.

- Krista

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Old 05-13-2006, 01:40 PM
 
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Originally Posted by veganf
I have no idea, I've never asked. We're not Jewish, or anything for that matter, we just chose her as our pediatrician based on what kind of care we wanted for our children: both an M.D. and an alternative care provider (she usually prescribes homeopathy first).
I've never asked her if her own son was circ'd, because I don't think it's appropriate to ask, but I have wondered.
Just wondering, perhaps she got him done and was against it after seeing it first hand...

I can appreciate you not wanting to ask though.
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