Any couples not on the same page about circ./remaining intact - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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The Case Against Circumcision > Any couples not on the same page about circ./remaining intact
Samjm's Avatar Samjm 03:31 PM 05-16-2006
I could have written your post, with the exception that I'm not pregnant now.

I'm so glad our first child was a girl, as it has given me time to "work" on DH.

I've been dropping comments into conversations, leaving reading material lying around etc etc. (I was so pleased to see him actually reading one of the articles the other day!)

He is a huge fan of Penn and Teller's shows, so I'm eagerly waiting for the circ one to be released.

I've been lucky that I've been able to bring up the topic in a non-pressure way, since we're not even trying for number 2 yet. I'm hoping that it at least makes him question it and do his own research.


If he still hasn't come around by the time we're pregnant with #2, I'll resort to a harder "sell" approach.

Good Luck!

Revamp's Avatar Revamp 03:53 PM 05-16-2006
Own research sounds good but be wary of him finding the wrong site such as Circ[mis]Info ("Despite moderate risks circumcision is safer by 100 times!") and getting misled.

But an hard sell before there is even a zygote could be bad, your approach seems best.
julie128's Avatar julie128 06:19 PM 05-16-2006
You could say, why don't we wait and let junior decide for himself?
julie128's Avatar julie128 06:25 PM 05-16-2006
OT

Quote:
Originally Posted by mattemma04
I would not circ. It is really not discussed,but last time religion was mentioned I said," Well if God wants me to cut off half my sons penis he's going to have to come talk to me about it."
Actually, He did: http://bibleresources.bible.com/pass...17&version1=45

(No, I am NOT trying to start a discussion on this!!!! Just pointing out the flaw in the argument. Might want to find a new one.)
Revamp's Avatar Revamp 07:48 PM 05-16-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by julie128
OT



Actually, He did: http://bibleresources.bible.com/pass...17&version1=45

(No, I am NOT trying to start a discussion on this!!!! Just pointing out the flaw in the argument. Might want to find a new one.)
Interesting...

"He who is eight days old among you shall be circumcised, every male throughout your generations, whether born in [your] house or bought with [your] money from any foreigner not of your offspring."

I shall be sure to remind my Jewish friends of that next time they buy a slave...

Funny...I just can not seem to get the word "Obsolete" out of my head. Wonder why?
Fi.'s Avatar Fi. 02:58 AM 05-17-2006
Quote:
Actually, He did: http://bibleresources.bible.com/pass...&versi on1=45
That only applies if you're Jewish. If the family isn't Jewish than God hasn't commanded them to cut anything off.
boingo82's Avatar boingo82 02:11 PM 05-17-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by Revamp
Interesting...

"He who is eight days old among you shall be circumcised, every male throughout your generations, whether born in [your] house ..
So as long as you don't homebirth, your sons can keep their whole penis!
Revamp's Avatar Revamp 05:20 PM 05-17-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by boingo82
So as long as you don't homebirth, your sons can keep their whole penis!
LOL!

Great point, gotta love theo-pedantry!
shelbean91's Avatar shelbean91 06:32 PM 05-17-2006
For us, there wasn't much discussion. I decided I didn't want to circ. I was never sure how/when to bring it up since dh and everyone he knows is circ'd. I told him in the car on the way home from the hospital that ds was intact. My thoughts- it's nasty to have an open wound in a diaper w/urine/feces. It can always be done later, but can't be undone. It's unnecessary surgery and I'm not into unnecessary surgery.
jyurina's Avatar jyurina 10:57 PM 05-21-2006
Okay, i am ashamed to admit that for all my normal birthing, breastfeeding, co-sleeping opinions I was actually for circing my son when I was pg. I had never ever really thought about it. Then my wise hubby-who is circed-asked me why I did stacks of research on episiotomies but didn't for circing and then planned to do it. So I did the research, was HORRIFIED and hence our son is intact. My feeling is that while I may not agree with someones decision, as long as it is made with VALID research to back it, I respect the right for someone to make it. Thats the catch though. Any of our important kid decisions involves large amounts of research and I expect the same from others. As for the emotional scarring-here is my favorite story for people that argue that the kid will feel bad cause they look different. My son(3 at the time) was showering with dad and asked about the scar. So daddy told him why he had it and explained why our son didn't. My sweet kid actually started crying and telling his daddy how sorry he was that he had been hurt. So I figure if he can understand at 3 he will most likely get it when he is a teenager too!
Revamp's Avatar Revamp 11:23 PM 05-21-2006
So the only worry it caused him was that his father was cut... Interesting. Not really sure if I should say I am glad or anything but it is good news somehow.

Glad your mind was turned around by the facts.
jessjgh1's Avatar jessjgh1 02:28 AM 05-22-2006
Jyurina,
Your comment about dh suggesting you research circumcision was great.

Unfortunatly, my dh usually tells me that I do too much research online(-; He likes to just have a doctor tell him what to do.

Of course, especially after pregnancy/birth etc., I am so much LESS likely to trust a doctor's advice than before- and I was already burned enough times to be skeptical.

Jessica
mamatoablessing's Avatar mamatoablessing 01:19 PM 05-22-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessjgh1
Unfortunatly, my dh usually tells me that I do too much research online(-; He likes to just have a doctor tell him what to do.
UGH, yes! My DH said the same thing about research and since his sister and BIL both work in the medical fields (RN and EMT) he lives and dies by the advice they give him. So sad...
jyurina's Avatar jyurina 09:23 PM 05-25-2006
Well then, I say find a pediatrician that doesn't advocate circ. I have found that doctors from other countries in general do not have the circ bias that many from here have. My kids have had Korean, Chinese and Indian doctors and they never told me that it was neccesary. So call around, ask what their opinion is on it and then have your dh talk to a mediacal professional with another point of view. You can find peds that will reccomend weaning to formula and many other things that are directly contrary to current research. You just gotta find the ones that keep current. ANy doctor that goes by the recent AAP reccomendations will back you up that the reasons used are BS.
jyurina's Avatar jyurina 09:26 PM 05-25-2006
I'm confused. What else would he have asked about? He was only 3. Now that he is older and has circed cousins he has asked why they are cut. Let me tell you, that is a hard explanation. He still can't fathom why anyone would do that to their kids. I hope he never changes
bugmenot's Avatar bugmenot 05:35 PM 05-26-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by julie128
OT



Actually, He did: http://bibleresources.bible.com/pass...17&version1=45

(No, I am NOT trying to start a discussion on this!!!! Just pointing out the flaw in the argument. Might want to find a new one.)
I didn't see the other comments, but here's a bit more:

Please note that I do not want to start an argument and I do not know your religion or religious history.

In the Letters from Paul (New Testament, aka "Christian Scripture"), Paul writes how Baptism has replaced circumcision and that if the person is baptized, then that is enough of a requirement to belong to the Christian Church.

Circumcision when mentioned in the Old Testament (Hebrew Scriptures) is part of a whole religious ceremony, involving giving the baby his Hebrew name as well as the snipping of the foreskin and (i'm sure) many other traditions. IMO, Biblical Circumcision and hospital circumcision (RIC) are two different things.

Once again, I don't wish to start an impasse, I merely wanted to point that out.
bugmenot's Avatar bugmenot 05:39 PM 05-26-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by julie128
You could say, why don't we wait and let junior decide for himself?
Exactly what I decided on. DH and I wrote down lists of "reasons to do" and "reasons not to do". We eventually decided that for most every reason "to do", there was a reason "not to do" and the list was about 50/50.

Depending on what state you live in, there might be a law such as "if the two parents disagree, it won't be done" or "the mother has the deciding vote."
Revamp's Avatar Revamp 05:41 PM 05-26-2006
Quote:
Originally Posted by bugmenot
the snipping of the foreskin
Sorry to play pedant but that phrase applied to this ritual always irks me: Rabbis use a knife, not a pair of scissors. The foreskin is sliced off.
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