Are there parents whose sons who are circ and intact and have commented on each other - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 10-11-2006, 08:15 PM - Thread Starter
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Are there any parents out there who have one circ and one intact son or their father is circ and they are not and have commented about it? Or asked you questions about why they look different? I would like to know how you handled the topic with your sons.
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#2 of 4 Old 10-11-2006, 08:39 PM
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My two sons (11 and 7) are intact, dh is circ'd. We are not a terribly modest family, so both boys have had plenty of opportunity to see dh in all his glory. Neither one has ever noticed or said a word about it. When older ds was about 6, I mentioned to him that some people are circ'd, like daddy, and some are intact, like him and his brother. He paid it practically no attention. He did ask me why parents circ and why we didn't and was very satisfied with the answer. As he's gotten older, I've given him more information, he understands it well and definitely can see why we didn't do it. Younger ds has either never noticed, or didn't say anything if he did.

It really wouldn't make a difference, as all the penises in this house look different from each other. One circ'd, big, and hairy, one intact with a fairly short foreskin (goes just to the end of the glans), and one with quite a long (half inch) overhang.

I have heard the kids (girls included) giggling about how big and hairy daddy's thing was. Now that they are all getting a bit older (4,7,8, and 11), we are more modest.

Kids really do understand and accept differences between people. The circ'd dad/intact sons "issue" has been such a non-issue for us.

My good friend circ'd her first son, and not her next two. DH is circ'd, and she has told me that it hasn't been noticed or brought up yet- her boys are 7, 4, 2. They bathe together nightly and have seen their dad's penis. No issues there either.

Hope this helps.
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#3 of 4 Old 10-12-2006, 12:10 AM
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Yes--one circ'ed son, one intact. Boys have never seen their dad naked so they couldn't have noticed his status.

My older son (circ'ed) didn't notice the difference between him and his intact brother until very recently, when he was almost 6. He asked me about it, I gave a brief explanation without any gory details (didn't want to scare him) and a simple apology. He didn't seem traumatized, but did say he wished he had the "whole thing" and he asked me to please never do that if I had any more babies. I promised I wouldn't, and he seemed relieved. Then got back to playing, and hasn't mentioned it since or seemed especially pensive or anything.
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#4 of 4 Old 10-12-2006, 11:55 AM
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My twin sons are intact; their Dad is not. The only comments they ever made about his penis was when they were very small, and they noticed that Dad's penis was HUGE (right at their eye level!), and he had hair.

We didn't talk to them about circumcision until they were 8, and the word cam up in a church sermon, of all places, and they asked what it meant. As neutrally as I could, I told them that circumcision means cutting off the foreksin. See my siggie for their response. So I told them that most men don't choose it for themselves, but parents do it to their babies soon after they are born. Our sitter at the time had a 4-month-old son who is circumcised, and they both said "Oh, poor Baby!" When I told them that their Dad was circumcised, one of them said "Poor Dad! He's missing the best part!"

While they had noticed that their Dad's glans was exposed, it never EVER occured to them that it was because his foreskin had been amputated - they simply assumed he kept it retracted. One of them told us that he had tried keeping his foreskin retracted, but it was uncomfortable so he stopped. No big deal. They certainly did not ask to have their own foreskins cut off - they are quite attached to them (pun intended).

A few years later we learned - much to our surprise - that DH's father was intact. Neither he nor his brother had any idea. Apparently he bought into the propoganda he heard while he was in the Navy during WWII, even though he never had any problems himself, and had both his sons circumcised.

Recently I discussed circumcision with one of my sons (now 12). I told him that some people circumcise their sons so they won't be different, and he said "But we're different in a million other ways!" I asked him how he would react if a boy commented on his foreskin in the bathroom or locker room; his response was "Ewww! You looked!?"

I would much rather be in a position of explaining to my sons why I did NOT cut off a normal, healthy part of their genitals than explaining why I DID.

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