Thinking about this issue too much - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 33 Old 06-29-2003, 10:19 AM
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Even though you didn't state it, I'm assuming your SO is circumcised so he doesn't have the "equipment either and therefore he has no vote. That means the only one who has a vote is the baby and the decision will just have to be delayed until he is old enough to decide for himself. Of course, the chances of him ever doing that are about 1%. Not very much!

Also, the area where you are moving has a very low circumcision rate of less than 40% so if your son is circumcised, he will very much be the unusual one which would seem to bring questions of "What the heck were you thinking!" Just across the border in Canada, the circumcision rate is less than half that so a few more miles would mean very much unusual, so much so as to really stand out!

The New Testament is very specific in it's teachings about circumcision and the message is "Christians shouldn't." Since the religious issue is so incredibly hot, it is not allowed to be discussed here. If you will "Private Message" me, I will be happy to provide you with scriptures on the issue.

If you advise your OB/GYN and pediatrician that you absolutely do not want your son circumcised, it is highly unlikely that they would consent to it. That would be unethical. However, it is not impossible to find one that would do it. The thing you have going for you is that there are many more along the west coast that refuse to do the procedure at all and most would find it fishy if a father brought an infant in for circumcision and nothing else and would probably question it. Since he is not legally the father, he has no legal authority to have it done and the doctor could be held liable in a court of law. I suspect because of the above, he will give up before he finds someone who would perform the procedure. There is always the possibility of getting a court order preventing the procedure.

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#32 of 33 Old 06-29-2003, 12:04 PM
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[We've fought about this issue so much, we can't even seem to try and have just a "discussion" about why we feel and think the way we do. It always seems to erode down to I don't have a penis, so I don't get to vote. Or, it says to do it in the bible, so he's gettting it done. >>>.

I have heard other mothers say that(he has one so he decides),but that did not fly with me.Imo,as a parent,we have the responsibility to protect the genital integrity of our children-regardless of their sex(or religion).
Best wishes too you.All I say(and will forever say) is our son has the right to all his parts,and no one for any reason will ever cut off anything!

"Who has the say-so?">>>>

Your child should be the only one with the say-so.Remind your partner of this over and over.Remind him that he is cutting off an important part of his son for his own selfish?? reasons(and add that insult to injury it will be used in facial cream)
It should not even be a choice offered for parents.
In most states a single mother is the sole custodian of a child unless a bio father takes legal action to be a joint parent.I simply would keep the the children with you 24-7,but living in fear is really no way to live is it? Somehow you will have to resolve this issue with your partner whther it be one on one or through the courts.
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#33 of 33 Old 06-30-2003, 01:35 PM
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Originally posted by youngnhappymamma
I think that if every future parent where to actually see the procedure done, they would no longer have any doubts in their mind about what to do for their son.
ita!!!! i only wish dh and i would have researched this with my first pregnancy ( we thought we were having a girl)

l, <>< wife to my sweetie, proud mama to 3 cubs, 2 who clw & 1 that i i ep for . baby was evicted early by induction due to severe pre-e/hellp syndrome
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