Everytime a new medical professional meets my child, they have this strange need to reach for his penis. Usually, my hand goes out and DH screams (I love my convert)...this morning, the visiting nurse had me strip him to be weighed, so I stood over him (think boxing out...like in basketball) so she couldn't reach, read her the scale, and then diaper my munchkin. Last week, she told me he needs to be retracted "a little bit" and eventually, I'd be able to "pull it all the way back." Um, I'll leave that to him, thanks.
There's always a reason or excuse...I've come to announce that yes, we know he has a "tight" forskin...so no, you can't see the tip of his penis, but yes, I've seen him pee and it's a stream that hits his daddy on a semi-regular basis, so there's no need for you to look, thankyouverymuch.
My grandmother felt the need to ask about his circumcision...and when I explained we declined the cosmetic procedure, felt the need to tell me my father was circumcised...in a Catholic hospital...on a Sunday...by a Jewish doctor. I asked her to please add my father's penis to the top 10 list of things I never need to discuss again...right under my son's penis.
When we decided to leave our child intact we didn't realize we'd soon approach every doctor with a knot in our stomachs prepared to pounce should his diaper suddenly be opened. I feel like I'm perpetually on "Penis Patrol" and I'm searching for infant chastity belts so I can relax a bit!
Sorry, seriously I don't get this either. And it's supposed to be tight, that means it's doing it's job of protecting the glans.
Cheers for being the good mama bear!!
For us it's gotten better as they've gotten older
SAHMlovin' fan to DD 10/00 & DS 10/04 If your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumCirc, a personal choice, Your sons11/986/99anti-tobaccoThyroid cancer survivor. With & & (Boxer) wishing 4 &
Mom & RN
Pardon the typos - CWOK (cat walking on keyboard)
I have heard from other moms that their pediatricians would look at the diaper area (and even talk about retracting) when they were bringing their DS's in for unrelated things like ear infections. Whatever, right?
Next time, maybe you should take the opportunity to educate her?
Hugs kiddo..one day at a time, you'll get through all of this!
We fought this fight over 25 years ago. I even wrote an article about it, "Penile Remedies for Penile Torts" in The Compleat Mother. I think you can find it on www.cirp.org. Ron Goldman wrote a letter to Pediatrics in the early 80's entitled "Doesn't Everyone Know This" about the forcible retraction issue. I think the docs are still being misinformed. The pediatric texts are still full of misinformation. So it is up to every mom and dad to protect their son from these idiots. Sorry, but that is just the way it is.
Fortunately, my son has not been retracted and anyone caring for him knows not to...it's the next new doctor I worry about. I may just have to have a "touch my penis and my mom will sue" shirt made. It just saddens me that the majority of medical professionals he's seen have had the urge to "fix" a part of his body he's meant to have.
I should note, though, the pediatrician in charge of my son's case at the hospital the last couple of weeks was the president of 'quality and patient safety' - meaning he's in charge of the docs, nurses, and general goings-on at the hospital...and he expressed how unnecessary it would be to retract. Now, if he would just be sure the rest of his staff knew that...I'm just happy to not have gotten into trouble for grabbing (not gently) the hand of a resident who was "just looking" and explaining one looks with eyes, not hands or fingers...
I preface any appointment that requires the removal of underpants by saying if they need to see anything, I will do the touching. That goes for my ds and my dd. During a physical, or if there is a problem, I don't mind them looking, but I'd never take off their pants for an ear infection.
Not to mention it makes the teaching of "NOBODY can touch your privates" much more clear without the excpetions of this doctor/this situation etc... Plus we likely have the same bacteria so i would think that mom/dad touching way decreases the risk of Dr. touching.
I hear you Irishcupcake. I am right there with you. I'm taping penis care instructions all over his isolette and wherever else he goes.
That'll be me when we go in for his heart surgery...thank you for the wonderful idea...I'm so sorry you're in a position to think of it.