Was anyone NOT coerced? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums
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The Case Against Circumcision > Was anyone NOT coerced?
urchin_grey's Avatar urchin_grey 12:29 AM 07-25-2008
Originally Posted by stacyann21 View Post
When I took him for his first check-up with the ped she peeked in his diaper and said "I'm checking to see how he's healing". After looking she said "Oh" with a confused look on her face and quickly put the diaper back on LOL.
Oh good grief.

DocsNemesis's Avatar DocsNemesis 04:22 PM 07-27-2008
Wow, she just assumed? Heh. I was always asked-I think because if he wasnt there wasnt a reason to look maybe? I dunno.

It occured to me that my friends OB is extremely pro circ and well...now I have the urge to call and find out what his circ rates are. Its sad that parents might pick him as an OB and their sons will end up circ'd over lies and garbage. Grrrr. I think I'm going to print out a bunch of anti circ literature and leave it all over his office, hehehehehee
prothyraia's Avatar prothyraia 06:06 PM 07-27-2008
When we told my ped we weren't planning on circing, she said "Good!....I mean, I'm not supposed to say that, but, uh...good."
WC_hapamama's Avatar WC_hapamama 07:00 PM 07-27-2008
The hospital that my eldest was born at didn't do circ's on site, so it was a non-issue.

When my second son was born, the OB's never mentioned it, the nurses at the hospital asked twice, and the pediatrician asked once, but had a positive reaction when we told him we were not.

The OB I had with my youngest son never asked, I had x'ed out the consent form with the hospital pre-registration, and the pediatrician never asked.

Our ped is very intact friendly. Honestly the only problem I've ever run into was with my MIL, who insisted on retracting and cleaning eldest son before we had his ped at the time tell her no.

DH is intact, and our oldest son's first pediatrician was also DH's pediatrician from birth to 19... MIL didn't believe us that retracting wasn't the thing to do anymore.
mamahart's Avatar mamahart 07:22 PM 07-27-2008
No issue here. I had a neccessary c-section and am a bit fierce in hospitals so I barely let anyone touch my son Noone said anything to me about it but I was a little drugged and preeetty vocal about anyone doing anything to my baby unless he was in my arms. No shots or eye goop or any of that.
zoebugsmom's Avatar zoebugsmom 09:13 PM 07-27-2008
Originally Posted by In Exile View Post
I'd like to add another Northeast Hospital: Nobody asked us at WENTWORTH DOUGLASS HOSPITAL in DOVER, NH, although sadly enough they do them, but you have to arrange it far in advance, I have seen the circumstraints myself- in that separate little room at the nursery. But the hospital does not solicit genital mutilation, nobody even asked there. And the nurses were quite happy.
And Telle Bear, are we seeing the same Ped? Our's wasn't jumping up and down but he is pretty awesome in general...

They must have changeed that. We were definitely asked in '05 when ds was born. It'll be interesting to find out if we're asked again this fall.

We did have one nurse who was awesome in general but told us to retract ds at every diaper change. We had assumed she thought he was circed.
rrs's Avatar rrs 09:40 PM 07-27-2008
I wasn't at all. No one even really brought it up to me.

On his birthday, my doctor asked "Am I circing this baby?" When I said no, she said, "Thank goodness, good for you."

ETA: Also, none of the pediatricians in his pediatrician's group ever said anything. However, his primary care provider did say, "Oh, you didn't circ? That's good. It's totally unnecessary; we don't pull teeth because you have to clean them."
In Exile's Avatar In Exile 12:03 PM 07-28-2008
Originally Posted by zoebugsmom View Post
They must have changeed that. We were definitely asked in '05 when ds was born. It'll be interesting to find out if we're asked again this fall.

We did have one nurse who was awesome in general but told us to retract ds at every diaper change. We had assumed she thought he was circed.
Oh, I see. Maybe I had a post-it in my chart saying "DON'T ask that woman unless you want an earful"...

But no, noone asked at the hospital-my midwife had a note in the chart saying "NO", but nobody at the hospital bat an eyelash in that matter. Exept for one stupid Ped saying: "Oh, I see, ahem, that's an option as well" (OPTION!!! yes, your baby's genitals are options )

Nobody was advising retraction as well and most nurses were pretty glad. (some said so!)

The Peds (Dover Pediatrics) are pretty awful in general, especially the 2 female Docs I got to know. Abrasive, cutting you off and ignoring your requests. The male was allright-although I could have done without him coming into our room literally wiping the blood of his hands from a circ he just did on another baby. (I knew because one of the LC said, he'll be right in after a circ-I felt awful for that baby).

I didn't care too much for the docs (or my own midwife! she really let me see her real "professional" face during the birth-and acting total granola during my pregnancy, other story)-but the nurses were almost all great! Especially the LCs were a lifesaver and all the other nurses were very supportive even of our "no eyegoop, oral Vit K and no Hep B"-one gave me the thumbs up and said "I did the same" and another one was DEFENDING me against my own friggin' midwife and made sure the oral Vit K was brough up from the pharmacy.
Teresa221's Avatar Teresa221 12:13 PM 07-28-2008
Another NE hospital here (upstate NY). My midwife asked for each pregnancy - all of which I said no (and her reply was always "good"). Only one of my 3 was a boy and there was never a mention of it once he was born. It was in my birth plan though that I didn't want it and it seemed like the nurses had all read my birth plan. Perhaps that is why they didn't ask.

Never much of a mention at the many peds and family docs (I switched quite a bit after ds was born to find someone that "fit" me). They all seemed fine with it even though I hovered and reminded them repeatedly not to retract. I think I had read to many horror stories of that happening. The first time I did that with the doctor I ultimately stayed with, he turned and looked at me like I had 3 heads and said, "I know"

I'd say overall a very positive response from all caregivers for a pretty high circ'ing rate in my area.
abi&ben'smom's Avatar abi&ben'smom 01:22 PM 07-28-2008
Michigan, here. My nurse in the hospital seemed very relieved when we said no. And our ped. never mentioned it! (This was in '99)
zoshamosha's Avatar zoshamosha 08:14 PM 07-28-2008
Not coerced here. The CNM who delivered visited us in the hospital recovery room and said, "you guys aren't planning to circ are you?" That was it.

I had a brief, weird moment with a ped when ds was 2 days old. She said he possibly had hypospadias and called his penis "pre-circumcized." I quickly found another ped who, upon examining ds's diaper area, jauntily announed "There's a nice, uncircumcised penis!" : I love my ped!
DocsNemesis's Avatar DocsNemesis 10:13 PM 08-02-2008
Now I can add more to this-my ds was just born early and so far, I was asked once right before he was born by the nurse and that's it. I think I scared her a little with my "NO! And my dh would hurt someone if they tried!" lol.

He's still in the NICU and no one has mentioned it but I noticed its on their *go home checklist.* I wish they'd take that off of there, ick. It should be interesting to see how the NICU nurses react if/when they ask and I say no. Hopefully itll be positive
PatchChild's Avatar PatchChild 10:29 PM 08-02-2008
We were asked once if we planned to circ. Said no and no one mentioned it again. They did put a red dot on his crib and bracelet though, apparently the hospital sign for no circ. I had to laugh at that one. What do they do? Periodically wander through and peek at all the boys, grabbing any that haven't been circed?
A_Random_Phrase's Avatar A_Random_Phrase 11:38 PM 08-02-2008
Originally Posted by DocsNemesis View Post
I saw the thing about being coerced into circing and it made me wonder....how many people on here were lucky enough to have the opposite experience?
My son is 12 and we never planned on circing him. (XH was not circed either). It was no problem at all. No pressure. I don't remember them saying anything about taking care of the foreskin but I had learned much earlier that you were supposed to retract the foreskin and clean it regularly. I think I had also heard the opposite. Anyway, I had already decided that retracting it was an invasion of my baby's sexual privacy and I never did it. He was fine.

After having seen a circ during high school (I was taking a health occupations class- I'll spare you the bloody details - yuck!) and after realizing that the only real reason to circ is religious (and I'm not a Jew), I had decided long before I was married never to do that to a baby.(They told me the baby would cry because it was strapped down - that it wouldn't feel pain.) By the time I had kids, I don't think they were using a knife to cut but it still was unacceptable to me to put a newborn through unnecessary pain. And for what, to mutilate a very private part of its anatomy?
mija y mijo's Avatar mija y mijo 02:08 AM 08-03-2008
Both hospital births. DD in the Midwest. DS in the Northeast.

When I was pregnant with DD I was asked if we would circ the baby if it was a boy, no was the answer, and that was that.

I was asked towards the end of pregnancy with DS. Nope, no circumcising here, thank you very much. They jotted in down in the birth plan and left it at that. I do think a nurse asked us in the hospital after he was born, as in, "You're not circumcising, so you don't need to worry about that," as we were trying to get the hell out of there asap.

No pressure ever, thankfully.
ericswifey27's Avatar ericswifey27 04:09 AM 08-03-2008
That was the ONLY part (leaving him intact) of my birth plan followed for DS1 and I am very thankful for at least that.

DS2 was born at home so that was a non-issue:
not now's Avatar not now 04:22 AM 08-03-2008
Neither my ped or my OB balked when I said we weren't circing. I doubt the nurses will bother since I'm Mexican and a majority of Mexicans (at least around here) don't circ.
Night_Nurse's Avatar Night_Nurse 05:35 AM 08-03-2008
Ahhh, I had missed reading the fact that you delivered early. Congratulations to you and your family!
DocsNemesis's Avatar DocsNemesis 04:02 PM 08-03-2008

I changed his diaper for the first time yesterday and I told dh I cant imagine HOW they can circ a preemie. I mean, a normal newborn has a small um...yeah...but a preemie has so little there to begin with! Its scary honestly.
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