when should my sons penis retract = when is there a problem? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 11-15-2010, 07:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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my son has a bad infection right now, and if we could retract the skin we could clean it properly so we are stuck. the whole looks very small , even though it seems like the skin has separated from the head- we cant pull the skin back at all. any thoughts?

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#2 of 7 Old 11-15-2010, 08:09 PM
 
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What makes you think he has an infection?

 

It is perfectly normal for the foreskin to be non-retractable till puberty.  The age at which boys become retractable varies greatly.

 

More cleaning doesn't prevent infections, it actually causes them.  Just as women who clean inside their vaginas with soap get more infections, men who clean under the foreskin with soap get more infections.  The genitals naturally have a certain Ph and flora balance that gets disrupted by over cleaning.


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#3 of 7 Old 11-15-2010, 11:33 PM
 
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yeahthat.gif the avg. age of retraction is 10.5yo with any time between birth and adulthood being in the range of normal. The only time it becomes a problem is if the boy is well into puberty and it is hurting him because it wont retract.

Has your ds had a culture done to prove infection or are they just going by symptoms because infection and separation can look a lot alike especially to Drs who have little to no knowledge of the normal development of the intact penis.

You cannot tell by looking how small or large that hole is since it changes size all the time. It is a sphincter like the anus and clamps down when not in use to keep stuff out. If someone is messing with it it will clamp down to protect the boy unless he is fully retractable.

 
SAHMlady.gifread.giflovin' trekkie.giffan intactivist.gifwinner.jpg to loveeyes.gifenergy.gifDD 10/00 & superhero.gifmoon.gifDS 10/04 ribbonpb.gifIf your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumnocirc.gifCirc, a personal choice, Your sonsyes.gifbrokenheart.gif11/98brokenheart.gif6/99ribbonbrown.gifanti-tobaccoribbonyellow.gifThyroid cancer survivor. With cat.gif& goldfish.gif & (Boxer)dog2.gif wishing 4 whale.gif&ribbonwhite.gifsigncirc1.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gif

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#4 of 7 Old 11-16-2010, 03:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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they did a urine culture at the emergency room last night, it is definitely an infection, his whole penis is swollen to about 3 times the size and he is in so much pain when he pees, and walks.  i have to go for a follow up with a urologist next week, i am worried to hear what they recommend, but this infection is very scary.

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#5 of 7 Old 11-16-2010, 04:30 AM
 
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When it happened to my ds it was scary as well greensad.gif his penis swelled to the size of his wrist he was about the same age as your ds is. The abx cleared it up and he has never had any other issues since then. I was given the he may need circ speech and I told the Dr. that wasnt happening ever. It was not nor will it ever be an option unless ds develops frostbite, cancer or gangrene or he chooses to have it done as an adult once he is out of my house.

Having been where you are I can totally sympathize it sucks, I went through so many emotions even for a few minutes doubting myself for leaving him intact then I reminded myself about dd going through a very similar thing with a nasty yeast infection and how ds had he been circed he would always have that very important part missing from his life. It is very easy to doubt yourself when everyone around you is telling you that if he was circed this wouldnt be a problem which just isnt so.

You can about bet they will give you the circ speech since the vast majority of Dr. here in the USA know nothing about the intact penis other than how to circ it. He may talk to you about steroid cream but that should only be used by a boy in puberty or adulthood because it might work to make him retract in the short term once you stop using it his body will go back to its natural non retractile state since it isnt ready to retract yet.

I am sorry your ds has went through this hug.gif

You just have to keep repeating to yourself that these things happen to both boys and girls and they get better and move on. Just like when they get sick it is part of growing up. Your ds could have had the same infection had he been circed so being intact isnt the problem here.

My older brother was circed at 3yo he got an infection just like my ds and your ds but my mom was told by the Dr. it would happen again even though the abx they gave hm fixed it my mom went ahead with the circ. Because of that my brother suffered far worse with the unneeded circ than he ever did with that infection. Stories like this are the reason being intact was given a bad name.

Protect your ds dont let them cut on him for something that can easily be fixed with abx.

I wanted to ask has your ds been retracted by anyone in the past before this happened? Did anything unusual happen leading up to this incident ie a long car ride or swimming in a pool? It honestly is unusual for an infection to happen and usually a cause can be found like with my ds dirty hands = bacterial infection.

Good luck to you and remember if this was your dd with a bad infection you wouldnt consider cutting on her so your ds should be viewed in the same way.

Sorry I rambled on and on there but it is so hard to put thoughts into words for me sometimes and I always fear I will miss saying something that would help. redface.gif and it scares me to think that you might consider circing your ds for this when I know that infection dosnt = circ.

 
SAHMlady.gifread.giflovin' trekkie.giffan intactivist.gifwinner.jpg to loveeyes.gifenergy.gifDD 10/00 & superhero.gifmoon.gifDS 10/04 ribbonpb.gifIf your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumnocirc.gifCirc, a personal choice, Your sonsyes.gifbrokenheart.gif11/98brokenheart.gif6/99ribbonbrown.gifanti-tobaccoribbonyellow.gifThyroid cancer survivor. With cat.gif& goldfish.gif & (Boxer)dog2.gif wishing 4 whale.gif&ribbonwhite.gifsigncirc1.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gif

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#6 of 7 Old 11-16-2010, 05:12 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NYMOM07 View Post

they did a urine culture at the emergency room last night, it is definitely an infection, his whole penis is swollen to about 3 times the size and he is in so much pain when he pees, and walks.  i have to go for a follow up with a urologist next week, i am worried to hear what they recommend, but this infection is very scary.



If a urine culture comes back positive, that means UTI, not foreskin infection.  To confirm foreskin infection, the outside of the foreskin should be swabbed.  Premature forcible retracting can actually cause UTIs.

 

 

Did the swelling start after the ER visit?  Did he have a catheter?  Was he forcibly retracted to place the cath?  The swelling could be from that if he was.  In which case he just needs to heal.

 

If the swelling started before you went to the ER, I would wonder if some one has been trying to retract him.  Does anyone other than you change his diapers or bath him?  


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#7 of 7 Old 11-16-2010, 07:22 PM
 
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Development of Retractile Foreskin

http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/info/retraction.html

 

Normal development of the prepuce: Birth through age 18

http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/


Wife to DH, Mom to my Intact Boys DS1: Born 02 Pain Med Free Hospital Birth, BF'ed for 9 Months, Partially Vax'd DS2: Born 06 via UC, BF'ed 3 years 10 months, and UnVax'd
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