Some questions from a future father. - Page 3 - Mothering Forums
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#61 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 11:21 AM
 
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Whoo-hoo!!! Congratulations!!! :

Quirky said it all in the last post.
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#62 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 11:23 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ericisbacchus
Well everybody...

if we have a son he will stay intact!

Cheers, and thanks all. I'll post whether it's a boy or girl when we find out.
:



I was going to post to agree with Ramlah, about pointing out that the foreskin is fused to the penis, not a "flap of skin" that is "snipped." When I was on the fence, that did it for me!! The way people refer to the "snip" makes it sound like taking off a hangnail, no big deal. Learning that was NOT the case made me decide against it. (Of course now I realize that even if it was a painless procedure it is not my decision to change someone else's anatomy. But it takes a while for those of us brought up in the US to come around to realizing that.)

Jen
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#63 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 11:40 AM
 
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what a great email to get this morning! i'm soooo happy for you! i'm giddy and giggling myself. congrats! unfortunately, instructional manuals don't pop out before the placenta. :LOL but as long as everything you do is to love and protect your baby, boy or girl, you should be fine. definitely let's us know! whoever thought we would encourage the "dad's opionion matters most" theory... hee hee hee. : : : :

Ange. Mama to boys. Yup. All Boys. All Intact. A bunch of other NFL, crunchy credentials too.
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#64 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 11:47 AM
 
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Congratulations! What a relief!!!!

DIYer mama to DD 11/00 and DS 6/05- both intact, naturally!
...missing Mothering Magazine...
 
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#65 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 11:55 AM
 
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They don't come with instruction manuals, but you've already deomnstrated that you have pretty good parental instincts. Listen to your baby, and listen to your heart: there's a reason our hearts break when a baby cries - it's because we're supposed to pick them up and comfort them!


The handy thing about babies is that they don't get manuals for us either, so if it takes 10 minutes for you to change a diaper, they don't know the difference. They grow and change slowly enough that you can keep up with on-the-job training.

If the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

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#66 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 01:33 PM
 
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I'm so glad your wife changed her mind.

I gave birth to my first 2 children in MO. One near the Ozarks and the other in St. Louis. It was 5 years ago but at the time both hospitals obtained circ consent prior to the birth (obviously it wasn't an issue after the birth as they both were girls). Make sure you are really careful about what you sign. The circ consent is often buried in admission paperwork.

mama to six ('98, '00, '04, '04, '06, '08)
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#67 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 03:25 PM
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Eric, congrats!! My 6 month old son is beautifully intact!

Be sure to make those stickers/signs/HUGE posters that say NO CIRC for the diapers and such if you're delivering in a hospital!

Yes, babies come with a manual... they are the manual. You're doing great already following your parenting instincts!

One thing I was going to post before I saw your 'update' was...

Is your wife posting on any 'mainstream' boards? If she is, you may want to either encourage her to come HERE instead, or find out what's being said on those mainstream parenting boards. If you think the circ issues are bad, so are the feeding 'schedules' and sleep 'schedules' and cry-it-out info...

BUT congrats on your victory!!!!!! Your (potential) son(s) will thank you!!!

-zak- Mama to three fantastic sons - 2005, 2007 & 2010 and expecting a daughter February 2012!

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#68 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 03:43 PM
 
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I'm so happy for you & your wife.

It's so nice that she came to that decision on her own (albeit w/ a little help )

Quote:
Does the kid come w/ an instruction manual?
You will continue to wish for one, throughout parenthood. Trust me
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#69 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 03:54 PM
 
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: :

YAY! Glad to hear the good news!

Like the pp said, the baby is the manual. You will do fine! Congratulations on your "victory"!

Oh, and get your dw over here! Keep her off of other, ahem, b boards bc.

Happily married to my dh, mama to ds1 (01/2005), ds2 (07/2007)  and dd (07/2009).
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#70 of 156 Old 09-28-2005, 04:55 PM
 
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I have been following this thread and I want to say I am absolutely delighted!!
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#71 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 01:50 AM
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Nope, no manual.

You should hang around here, even if you have a girl -- we could always use more male perspective on things

Long distance Mom to boarding school superstars E (9) and Layne (6).
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#72 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 02:07 AM
 
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: Good for you I'm so glad you two decided to leave him intact!

and yeah tell her to come over to mothering

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#73 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 11:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DahliaRW


Oh, and get your dw over here! Keep her off of other, ahem, b boards bc.
She posts at thenest. Is that site no good?
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#74 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 11:32 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zak
Be sure to make those stickers/signs/HUGE posters that say NO CIRC for the diapers and such if you're delivering in a hospital!
What do you mean?
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#75 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 11:43 AM
 
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Hospitals have been known to circ without consent.

-Angela
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#76 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 11:58 AM
 
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Heck, I'd bring a sharpie and write it on the diaper at every single diaper change.
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#77 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 11:58 AM
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Especially for where you live... since circ is 'common' in the medical community... be SURE you put NO CIRC signs, posters and stickers on everything... some people do the same for 'no bottles, no pacifiers, no artificial feeding'... things like that... and 'no vaxing', etc.

I had my son in a birth center, so I didn't have to deal w/ that... but if I ever do birth in a hospital, I'm gonna be a sign freak!

-zak- Mama to three fantastic sons - 2005, 2007 & 2010 and expecting a daughter February 2012!

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#78 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 07:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ericisbacchus
She posts at thenest. Is that site no good?

hi eric,

well, i took a trip to the other message board to see what it was like (i try to avoid that cause it normally just upsets me) and it definitely would not be a site i would recommend to someone with an intact child. a lot of misinformation about circ (even a story about someone's nephew who wasn't circed and had lots of problems--who i would bet money was forcibly retracted) and a lot of mama's who have formed an opinion not on fact or research, but on even more misinformation.

so, if you have a boy, or a girl, and need some health questions answered, i would head over here to mothering rather than that other site....

Ange. Mama to boys. Yup. All Boys. All Intact. A bunch of other NFL, crunchy credentials too.
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#79 of 156 Old 09-29-2005, 08:02 PM
 
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I haven't read all the other posts but I didn't want to not respond. Maybe you guys could compromise? Let me explain how (I mean no crazy thing like only do a half one or anything ). DSS is intact. DH wanted him to be circed (changed his mind there though! ) and his exwife wanted him intact. They agreed to leave him intact until a certain age and then they would revisit the issue (had they stayed married). DH now doesn't care. DSS has been intact all his life and now it's "normal" for DH. He wouldn't circ him now. Maybe your wife and you could agree on something like that. Say to leave him intact until he's 5 years old and then you can revisit the issue. Maybe by then she'll see that intact isn't bad or dirty or anything like that. Good luck!

ETA: :LOL I just went back and read the thread! Bwahahaha, guess I should have priior to posting! Yay!!! Glad to hear she changed her mind!

Give more**Expect Less
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#80 of 156 Old 09-30-2005, 11:53 AM
 
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Kudos to you for standing up to protect your unborn child...
You have received lots of good info...Not muych to add ehre other thatn an Atta boy " for taking this stance...BTW. I have never had an "infection" from a uncirced lover... DS is intact and is 13 and HE has never had any infection problems ..We taught him early how to clean himself when he was old enough (it isn't hard to do..soap and H2o :LOL ) Best of luck with your new child.. Glad to see yor wife now agrees with you..blessings on your child to be....Please let us know the details when known....
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#81 of 156 Old 10-01-2005, 03:31 AM
 
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That is such wonderful news!

By the way, have you checked out the gentle discipline and breastfeeding forums yet? Those are two of my favorites on here.

Reneé, 33 year old mom to Antonin 8/04 nocirc.gif and Arianna 9/06 gd.gif angel1.gifangel1.gif (6 weeks) 5/08. Married to Matt since 6/03 blowkiss.gif.  TTC a little rainbow rainbow1284.gifchartnew.gif http://www.FertilityFriend.com/home/4e4ac9 Currently in the 2WW 
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#82 of 156 Old 10-01-2005, 03:59 AM
 
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Could someone please PM me as to what B B C board (or whatever it is) is referring to?

And to the OP: Congratulations!!!! I'm glad that your wife changed her mind and ecstatic for your future child!
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#83 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 12:14 AM - Thread Starter
 
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OK - today was the day. Can everyone guess what we're having?



It's a good thing I've been talking about this with my wife.

That's right, we're having a boy.
I had pretty much won the argument. Now she's starting to sound a little unsure again.
I'm pretty sure I'll win again.
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#84 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 12:29 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ericisbacchus
OK - today was the day. Can everyone guess what we're having?



It's a good thing I've been talking about this with my wife.

That's right, we're having a boy.
I had pretty much won the argument. Now she's starting to sound a little unsure again.
I'm pretty sure I'll win again.
Congratulations on your son!
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#85 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 01:28 AM
 
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Congratulations! You will love having an (intact) son! You must be so excited for the birth!

Happily married to my dh, mama to ds1 (01/2005), ds2 (07/2007)  and dd (07/2009).
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#86 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 01:46 AM
 
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CONGRATULATIONS on your BOY!

How's about you send your wife on over here for a little info and moral support that intact is the way to go?

We'll be gentle with her, I promise.
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#87 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 09:19 AM
 
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CONGRATULATIONS!!

Is your wife committed to breastfeeding? I can post NOCIRC's position statement on how the pain, shock, and trauma of circumcision interferes with the likelihood of establishing a successful breastfeeding relationship. In addition to the risks of complications and death posed by circumcision, formula feeding increases a baby's risk of dying in its first year by 25% (and this is in the US - according to a study published in the Journal of Pediatrics). Then there's the lifelong increased risks of cancer, obesity, diabetes, and heart disease, not to mention ear infections, asthma, and diarrhea. As well as your wife's increased risks of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, and rheumatoid arthritis if she doesn't breastfeed.

The stakes are really high here. There is nothing more important for your baby's health and normal development than establishing and maintaining breastfeeding. There is no vaccine that can give your baby as much protection from as many diseases for his entire lifetime as breastfeeding.

(Even if a baby is anesthetized for the circ, there is still going to be plenty of post-op pain as the baby pees and poops on an open wound in diapers. I have personally known people who decided to circ and had baby refuse to latch or nurse effectively afterwards. One gave up bf totally. The other succeeded but had to work like hell to get baby back to the breast.)

http://www.nocirc.org/statements/breastfeeding.php

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#88 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 10:28 AM
 
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Congratulations, Eric!!!

Now that Junior has a gender, he will begin to feel even more like a "real" person - especially if you start calling him by name right away. I trust that your DW's mother tiger protective instincts will kick in, and she will be as committed as you are to making sure your precious baby doesn't suffer any needless pain.

When my twin sons were a week old, DH was cutting their fingernails - and he accidently cut a bit of James's thumb. I don't know who cried the most - me, James, or DH. If it had been anyone but DH (and if he hadn't been crying so hard), I would have attacked. I can't begin to imagine how I would have reacted if someone had hurt my babies intentionally (vaccinations were bad enough).

If the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

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#89 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 10:34 AM
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Congrats on the boy!! I LOVE mine!!

-zak- Mama to three fantastic sons - 2005, 2007 & 2010 and expecting a daughter February 2012!

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#90 of 156 Old 10-11-2005, 11:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh - we'll be breast feeding. It's cheaper


Well, that is ONE plus. I've read of the other benefits as well.
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