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#1 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My 7 yo needs to be circumsised but I've been putting it off because I don't want him going through that pain. But his foreskin does not pull back, he has a small opening and that's all. I tell him to pull the skin back and he does, sometimes I do it, but still it doesn't seem to work. Should I get him circumsised or will this problem go away on its own? Please help. Thanks.:
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#2 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:29 PM
 
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It's not uncommon for a foreskin to not retract until puberty. Is it bothering him?

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#3 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Really, I did not know that. No, it's not bothering him at all. It's bothering his dad and I more.
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#4 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:33 PM
 
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Oh, yikes!

OK, listen, as long as he is peeing normally, your son is 100% normal and does NOT need to be circumcised!!

Please stop pulling it back asap- this will only cause harm to your son in the form of infections and scar tissue because he is not yet naturally retractable! I repeat, this is normal- there is nothing wrong with not being retractable at his age. Please read this, from the American Academy of Pediatrics: http://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/
Quote:
Eventually, sometimes as long as 5, 10, or more years after birth, full separation occurs and the foreskin may then be pushed back away from the glans toward the abdomen. This is called foreskin retraction...
If the foreskin does not seem to retract easily early in life, it is important to realize that this is not abnormal and that it should eventually do so.
Quote:
Foreskin Retraction: As noted, the foreskin and glans develop as one tissue. Separation will evolve over time. It should not be forced. When will separation occur? Each child is different. Separation may occur before birth; this is rare. It may take a few days, weeks, months, or even years. This is normal. Although many foreskins will retract by age 5, there is no need for concern even after a longer period. Some boys do not attain full retractability of the foreskin until adolescence.
Who told you he needs to be circumcised? :

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#5 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:37 PM
 
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This is from a FAQ with Dr. Paul Fleiss, MD:
Quote:
-[The doctor says]Your son's foreskin is too tight. It doesn't retract. He needs to be circumcised.

The tightness of the foreskin is a safety mechanism that protects the glans and urethra from direct exposure to contaminants and germs. The tight foreskin also keeps the boy's glans warm, clean, and moist, and when he is an adult, it will give him pleasure. As long as your son can urinate, he is perfectly normal. There is no age by which a child's foreskin must be retractable. Do not let your doctor or anyone try to retract your child's foreskin. Optimal hygiene of the penis demands that the foreskin of infants and children be left alone. Premature retraction rips the skin of the penis open and causes your child extreme pain. There is no legitimate medical justification for retraction. The child's discomfort is proof of that.
http://www.mothering.com/articles/ne...uncircson.html

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#6 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:40 PM
 
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My 7 yo needs to be circumsised but I've been putting it off because I don't want him going through that pain. But his foreskin does not pull back, he has a small opening and that's all. I tell him to pull the skin back and he does, sometimes I do it, but still it doesn't seem to work. Should I get him circumsised or will this problem go away on its own? Please help. Thanks.
No 7 year old needs to be circumcised just because his foreskin doesn't retract yet. Is that what your doctor told you? It is normal for the foreskin to be sealed well up to puberty. There is absolutely no need to cut off a normal healthy part of him just because it hasn't retracted yet. At puberty, when boys start to masturbate, it begins to losen up naturally. In rare cases when it doesn't, the doctor may try a cream first and should that not work he can do a small incision to losen it (this should be your son's choice). A full-blown circ is an extremely aggressive response to a very minor situation which will probabally correct itself in time. If your son isn't retractable by his teens, a doctor can perscribe the cream I mentioned or have a small incision made to losen it so that it retracts.
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#7 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:46 PM
 
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The AAP says (American Academy of Pediatrics):


Foreskin retraction occurs when the foreskin can be pulled back away from the glans toward the abdomen. This process happens on its own. When it happens is different for every child. It may take a few days, weeks, months, or even years. [Or the foreskin may never become retractable.] This is normal. Most boys will be able to retract their foreskins by the time they are 18 years old. Some foreskins retract soon after birth. Separation can even occur before birth, but it is rare. As a boy becomes more aware of his body, he will most likely discover how to retract his own foreskin. Sometimes the foreskin will puff out, like a balloon, while a boy urinates. This is normal and is a sign that the foreskin and the glans have begun to separate from each other.

[Bravo! The normality of ballooning is seldom admitted. Ballooning is commoner in small boys than young men.]

Foreskin retraction should never be forced. While the foreskin is still attached to the glans of the penis, do not try to pull it back, especially in an infant. Forcing the foreskin to retract before it is ready may harm the penis and cause pain, bleeding, and tears in the skin.
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#8 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 03:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow! I'm so glad to get all this info. I just learned a whole lot here. I'm glad I waited and didn't get him circumsied! My in-laws were telling me that he may have to get circumsised but I was always putting it off. Thank you for all the info.
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#9 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 04:00 PM
 
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our pleasure!

Good wishes to you & your lucky little intact boy!
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#10 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 04:22 PM
 
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here is the actual link to the cirp page that I sent you:

http://www.cirp.org/library/hygiene/

Have a good weekend!
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#11 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 04:22 PM
 
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Yep. Just leave it be. Here in Scandinavia where circ is never done every one knows that foreskins should be left alone. For example my brother did not retract until he was 13 or 14. Totally normal!!!!

Just make sure that no one retracts the foreskin, not even doctors(who unfortenately are often quite uneducated about intact penis in USA). The owner of the penis knows when it is the right time .
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#12 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 05:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks again everyone. I've learned something new today.

Hope you all have a great week-end.
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#13 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 05:48 PM
 
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Thank goodness you came here for info. My heart is beating like a jackhammer after reading the OP. Please remember do not let anyone retract your son other than himself. It can cause major trouble for him later on down the road. Circ is always a last resort.


There is a steroid cream he can use if he is not retractable by the time he is sexually active along with simple stretching excercises (when he is ready) will almost always fix the problem.


Here is the AAP Intact Care Guide (American Academy of Pediatrics) and this is the Intact Care Agreement to give to the dr. http://www.circumcisionquotes.com/care.html


Quote:
Most boys will be able to retract their foreskins by the time they are 5 years old, yet others will not be able to until the teenage years. As a boy becomes more aware of his body, he will most likely discover how to retract his own foreskin. But foreskin retraction should never be forced. Until separation occurs, do not try to pull the foreskin back — especially an infant's. Forcing the foreskin to retract before it is ready may severely harm the penis and cause pain, bleeding and tears in the skin.

 
SAHMlady.gifread.giflovin' trekkie.giffan intactivist.gifwinner.jpg to loveeyes.gifenergy.gifDD 10/00 & superhero.gifmoon.gifDS 10/04 ribbonpb.gifIf your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumnocirc.gifCirc, a personal choice, Your sonsyes.gifbrokenheart.gif11/98brokenheart.gif6/99ribbonbrown.gifanti-tobaccoribbonyellow.gifThyroid cancer survivor. With cat.gif& goldfish.gif & (Boxer)dog2.gif wishing 4 whale.gif&ribbonwhite.gifsigncirc1.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gif

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#14 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 06:36 PM
 
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Good for you for coming here and getting the facts before doing something you'll regret later!

Sounds like your in-laws are putting pressure on you and your dh. The problem is, most people in the older generation know nothing about caring for an intact boy. They didn't have the internet back then to help them. Check out the web resources sticky at the top of this forum; it has links to many websites which will give you information on how to care for a natural boy.

Welcome to MDC!
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#15 of 47 Old 08-11-2006, 07:51 PM
 
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Just to help reassure you, my 10 year old's foreskin just retracted a few months ago. Leave it alone and it will do it in it's own time. I had a doctor tell me when ds was 7 that he "needed" to be circumcised.

I'm glad you came here!
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#17 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 12:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow! After reading all the info everybody gave me, I am in total shock! I had no idea it was this big a deal to circ your ds. I am soo happy to have read this info here because I have saved my ds and myself a lot of trouble.

There is only one little thing that's bothering me though. What's the deal with the mastubation thing? Boys who are circ can't do that or what?

I have decided NOT to go through with the circ with my ds. He is relieved also.
Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you! And if anyone tries to get me to through with it, I will show them all the info I have found.
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#18 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 01:06 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mother_star
Wow! After reading all the info everybody gave me, I am in total shock! I had no idea it was this big a deal to circ your ds. I am soo happy to have read this info here because I have saved my ds and myself a lot of trouble.

There is only one little thing that's bothering me though. What's the deal with the mastubation thing? Boys who are circ can't do that or what?

I have decided NOT to go through with the circ with my ds. He is relieved also.
Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you! And if anyone tries to get me to through with it, I will show them all the info I have found.
Circumcision for gentiles got its start in the Victorian era, the late 19th century, when, for some reason, they became convinced that masturbation was the cause of a whole bunch of evils. They believed that a circ'ed boy would be less likely to masturbate. Of course, we now know that that is not the case.
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#19 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 01:09 PM
 
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Mother Star: There is only one little thing that's bothering me though. What's the deal with the mastubation thing? Boys who are circ can't do that or what?
What an excellent question! A man who has a foreskin is much more fortunate. Not many circ'd men in the US no the difference. You can't miss what you never had. But I suspect many of them would be quite angry if they knew that they were missing an integral part of their penis. The foreskin acts as a gliding mechanism over the shaft, giving a man much pleasure during masturbation & sex.

A man who has been circ'd has very little shaft skin left, and no gliding action. He makes due with what he has left (his hand).

Anyway, i too have a question. what made you decide to keep your son intact?
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#20 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 01:13 PM
 
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in response to njeb:

Yes, the US Victorian era doctors knew that circ decreased sexual sensitivity & that is why that recommended it to the public as a way to curb self-love. It caught on like wildfire. Only in the last 25 years has the circ rate started to plummet in the States and in Canada, due in large part to the many people who have learned the truth behind it and those who work to educate others about the truth.
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#21 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 04:28 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mother_star
Wow! After reading all the info everybody gave me, I am in total shock! I had no idea it was this big a deal to circ your ds. I am soo happy to have read this info here because I have saved my ds and myself a lot of trouble.

There is only one little thing that's bothering me though. What's the deal with the mastubation thing? Boys who are circ can't do that or what?

I have decided NOT to go through with the circ with my ds. He is relieved also.
Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you! And if anyone tries to get me to through with it, I will show them all the info I have found.
I'm soooo glad you came here for info!! Your DS will thank you one day, lol.

Me Hubby
Colin 1/13/04 Elena 1/18/07
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#22 of 47 Old 08-12-2006, 10:18 PM
 
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Almost boy's masturbate intact or circed. The only difference is how it works. Intact men have the gliding action and a circed man does not.

When circ first became a big thing was back in the Victorian Era as a pp mentioned. It was believed that by causing pain of the genitals early on that would stay in the subconscious mind and deter masturbation. : if you read things written by "physiologists" this is what they say. Circ was seen as a cure for bed wetting, blinkness, problems with paying attention etc. And believe it or not these myths are still out there.

 
SAHMlady.gifread.giflovin' trekkie.giffan intactivist.gifwinner.jpg to loveeyes.gifenergy.gifDD 10/00 & superhero.gifmoon.gifDS 10/04 ribbonpb.gifIf your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumnocirc.gifCirc, a personal choice, Your sonsyes.gifbrokenheart.gif11/98brokenheart.gif6/99ribbonbrown.gifanti-tobaccoribbonyellow.gifThyroid cancer survivor. With cat.gif& goldfish.gif & (Boxer)dog2.gif wishing 4 whale.gif&ribbonwhite.gifsigncirc1.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gif

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#23 of 47 Old 08-13-2006, 08:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kldliam
Anyway, i too have a question. what made you decide to keep your son intact?
Here in Canada they don't circumsise baby boy's at birth and it never crossed my mind about even getting him circumsised until recently, because the foreskin was not retracting at all at 7yo. I thought boy's were suppose to have a retractable skin by then. But after reading all the info people gave me and checking out the links at the top of this page, I found out it was normal, so there I decided to wait and see what happens.
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#24 of 47 Old 08-13-2006, 11:12 AM
 
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Oh. I see. The default in Canada is to leave him intact. Cool. This American is jealous!

Dr. Paul Fleiss wrote some interesting comments here about foreskins that don't retract yet. So I am posting for other moms who might come across this thread in the future:

Full article here:

http://www.mothering.com/articles/ne...uncircson.html

Key exerpt from article:

-----------------------------------------------------------------
Quote:
Protect Your Uncircumcised Son: Expert Medical Advice for Parents
By Paul M. Fleiss
Issue 103, November/December 103


Your son's foreskin is too tight. It doesn't retract. He needs to be circumcised.

The tightness of the foreskin is a safety mechanism that protects the glans and urethra from direct exposure to contaminants and germs. The tight foreskin also keeps the boy's glans warm, clean, and moist, and when he is an adult, it will give him pleasure. As long as your son can urinate, he is perfectly normal. There is no age by which a child's foreskin must be retractable. Do not let your doctor or anyone try to retract your child's foreskin. Optimal hygiene of the penis demands that the foreskin of infants and children be left alone. Premature retraction rips the skin of the penis open and causes your child extreme pain. There is no legitimate medical justification for retraction. The child's discomfort is proof of that.

-Your son's foreskin is "adhered" to the glans. It must be amputated.

The attachment of the foreskin and glans is nature's way of protecting the undeveloped glans from premature exposure. Detachment is a normal physiological process that can take up to two decades to complete. By the end of puberty, the foreskin will have detached from the glans because hormones that are produced in great quantities at puberty help with the process. There is no age by which a child's foreskin must be fully separated from the glans.

Some misguided doctors might suggest that the "adhesions" between the foreskin and glans should be broken so that your son can retract his foreskin. This procedure is called synechotomy. To perform it, the doctor pushes a blunt metal probe under the foreskin and forcibly rips it from the glans. It's as painful and traumatic as having a metal probe stuck under your fingernail to pull if off. It will also cause bleeding and may result in infection and scarring of the inner lining of the foreskin and the glans. The wounds that are created by this forced separation can fuse together, causing true adhesions. There is no medical justification for this procedure because the foreskin is not supposed to be separated from the glans in childhood. If any doctor suggests this procedure for your son, firmly refuse, stating, "Leave it alone!"
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#25 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 12:09 AM
 
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I'm just loving the way this thread went!

OP- I'm so glad you came here and got the right info...

and everyone else- See? we make a difference!

R~mama to 3

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#26 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 12:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mother_star
Here in Canada they don't circumsise baby boy's at birth and it never crossed my mind about even getting him circumsised until recently, because the foreskin was not retracting at all at 7yo. I thought boy's were suppose to have a retractable skin by then. But after reading all the info people gave me and checking out the links at the top of this page, I found out it was normal, so there I decided to wait and see what happens.
Really? I went swimming in a public swimming pool for the first time in like, 8 years and in the change room I was surprised to see the amount of circumcised boys from age 4 or 5 all the way up to 10 or 11. Perhaps 7 or 8 of them; I didn't really keep track. I think I saw maybe 4 or 5 intact boys ranging in age from 5 or 6 to 7.
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#27 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 12:56 AM
 
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There was another thread recently where Pandora mentioned that the circumcision rate in Canada is only 18%.

~*Kristi*~
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#28 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 08:11 AM - Thread Starter
 
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In Canada, well here in Quebec anyway, if you have a son who's foreskin does not retract and the parents are concerned, and want to have thier son circumsised the doctor will do it.
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#29 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 08:28 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Microsoap
Really? I went swimming in a public swimming pool for the first time in like, 8 years and in the change room I was surprised to see the amount of circumcised boys from age 4 or 5 all the way up to 10 or 11. Perhaps 7 or 8 of them; I didn't really keep track. I think I saw maybe 4 or 5 intact boys ranging in age from 5 or 6 to 7.
The overall circ rate in Canada is 14%. It is 18% in ONtario. http://www.courtchallenge.com/refs/yr99p-e.html

It is as high as 30% in PEI and as low as 1% in Nova Scotia.

However, I do remember reading that the London area has a higher rate of circumcision than the rest of ONtario for some reason.

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#30 of 47 Old 08-14-2006, 10:55 AM
 
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Thanks for the correction, lissa. I am happy to hear the overall rate is even lower than that.

~*Kristi*~
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