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#31 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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I am distrubed that grown men find it's to hard to; retract, rinse and replace.
Please invite all the intact but hate it men you know to this board so they can see how lucky they really are to have their whole penis.

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#32 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 11:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Not to mention... circumcision has the risk of infection, death, and decreased sexual function later in life. All of these very real, researched risks and common side effects of circ. are PROVEN...... whereas all the supposed "risks" of keeping a foreskin keep turning out totally bunk.

It is a cure that is desperately searching for a disease to justify the hundreds of things that can and do go wrong with the amputation of a valuable functioning body part.
i think this is going to be my strongest argument. i don't think he could handle if something happened to our next son because of a circumcision that he wanted. i know that there's hope at least because he is willing to look up the vast amounts of research out there instead of crossing his arms like an idiot and just saying "nope!"
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#33 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 11:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Sheacoby View Post
I am distrubed that grown men find it's to hard to; retract, rinse and replace.
Please invite all the intact but hate it men you know to this board so they can see how lucky they really are to have their whole penis.
i knooooooow right?! hubby AND my guy friend BOTH told me that and my jaw just dropped w/ the last guy. i was like, you've GOT to be kidding me!! if it was seriously an issue, they would have "male infection creams" on the pharmacy shelves, just like women have vagisil and fracking monistat and all that other messy stuff! it's not that hard to keep yourself clean, if i can do it, i'm sure a guy can too, he's got less to maintain!
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#34 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 11:25 PM
 
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word. i know how common it ISN'T in his generation, he probably only knows a handful, and just the one who got it done when he was an adult. the others who are still intact he says tell him they wish their parents had done it when they were babies because it's a pain in the ass to maintain.


i kinda think that's retarded because if you have basic hygiene habits you should be fine, right? he says they tell him that if they don't clean it after EVERY time they PEE, that it starts to smell!! wt..?!
: : :

What on earth?! Where do you live?

I'm intact and you don't have to wash up every time you pee. WTF? Do women have to wash their vaginas every time they pee? What kind of brain washing have these men received? A shower every day is more than sufficient.

What is it with the cleanliness thing? Why do people presume that circ'd penises are clean? The groin area is a damp, moist, musty place whether your penis is circ'd or not. It doesn't smell like roses!
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#35 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 11:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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: : :

What on earth?! Where do you live?

I'm intact and you don't have to wash up every time you pee. WTF? Do women have to wash their vaginas every time they pee? What kind of brain washing have these men received? A shower every day is more than sufficient.

What is it with the cleanliness thing? Why do people presume that circ'd penises are clean? The groin is area is a damp, moist, musty place whether your penis is circ'd or not. It doesn't smell like roses!
laughup

i know that was what i was thinking! i was like, ok well i don't wash after i pee... after a long day it's definitely time for a shower, but it's not like instant stinky after i leave the bathroom, why would guys be like that if they were intact like i am? his homies must be some serious dirty birds.
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#36 of 49 Old 07-16-2007, 11:58 PM
 
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laughup

i know that was what i was thinking! i was like, ok well i don't wash after i pee... after a long day it's definitely time for a shower, but it's not like instant stinky after i leave the bathroom, why would guys be like that if they were intact like i am? his homies must be some serious dirty birds.
I don't even think they're dirty. It sounds to me like they've had some negative influences and brain washing. I.e. someone telling them their penises are dirty.

I mean the whole thing about cleaning after every urination is crazy. First off, when I pee, I retract the foreskin so the urine doesn't even really touch it. Then I shake the drops out, and replace the foreskin. Badda boom. Circ'd men have drops of urine still in their urethra too. But it's not considered "dirty". It's all so ridiculous.

Maybe as a heterosexual intact male I'm the one who's confused. Ladies and gents who have first-hand experience with circ'd penises, do they smell like fresh daffodils? I'm baffled.
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#37 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 01:12 AM
 
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Ladies and gents who have first-hand experience with circ'd penises, do they smell like fresh daffodils?
Umm, that would be a no.
Of course, neither do I most days, so its all good.

OP, it sounds like you've gotten a good handle on this, but I wanted to agree with others who have already said this- the easiest and safest way to deal with this is to let the child decide for himself, as an adult. No risks of death/injury/etc as a baby, and no risk that he'd feel sorry about what was done later. As others have pointed out, its far easier to be circumcised as an adult than to try to restore. And the pain management for the procedure would be far better for an adult than the great lot of nothing they give babies.
Though its more likely he would not want to do it at all.

Homeschooling mom of 2 rambunctious, loving, spectacular boys, wife to an incredible man who has been my best friend on this journey <3

 

 

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#38 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 01:20 AM
 
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It's my experience that, with either circ'ed or intact, it ain't the penis that gets ripe first, but it's close friends and neighbors. :
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#39 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 02:03 AM
 
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My dh rinses under his foreskin every day or every other day during his shower I have NO complaints whatsoever about his hygiene. We were both born in 1983 and most men in our generation were/are circumcised and yet my dh is very happy that he was left intact. Of course, we live on the West Coast so that could have something to do with it... but still...

The only guy I know who chose to be circumcised as an adult still appreciated that his parents left the decision up to HIM since it's HIS penis. My ex-boyfriend was happy to be intact and slept around a ton as well (in case your dh tries to use the excuse that girls don't like intact penises...) and has absolutely no plans to be circumcised ever.

I also know at least three guys my age who really wish they had NOT been circumcised, but there's not a whole lot they can do about it now. The decision was taken away from them before they could even have a say in what was done to their own body (the most private part of their own body, no less) :

I also know circumcised men who are happy that they were circumcised, but I'm not convinced that they aren't just in denial And they, of course, have nothing to compare it to... just like women who were circumcised who claim that they're happy and aren't missing out on anything (and those women definitely do exist - it's all about cultural expectations...).

love and peace.

mama to two girls and due in November!
: Circumcision can never be undone :
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#40 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 02:56 AM
 
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Just tell him sorry no circ, ain't going to happen so just get over it. His excuses are pathetic and not even plausable anyway. UGH!
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#41 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 04:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by trmpetplaya View Post
My dh rinses under his foreskin every day or every other day during his shower I have NO complaints whatsoever about his hygiene. We were both born in 1983 and most men in our generation were/are circumcised and yet my dh is very happy that he was left intact. Of course, we live on the West Coast so that could have something to do with it... but still...

The only guy I know who chose to be circumcised as an adult still appreciated that his parents left the decision up to HIM since it's HIS penis. My ex-boyfriend was happy to be intact and slept around a ton as well (in case your dh tries to use the excuse that girls don't like intact penises...) and has absolutely no plans to be circumcised ever.

I also know at least three guys my age who really wish they had NOT been circumcised, but there's not a whole lot they can do about it now. The decision was taken away from them before they could even have a say in what was done to their own body (the most private part of their own body, no less) :

I also know circumcised men who are happy that they were circumcised, but I'm not convinced that they aren't just in denial And they, of course, have nothing to compare it to... just like women who were circumcised who claim that they're happy and aren't missing out on anything (and those women definitely do exist - it's all about cultural expectations...).

love and peace.
i think it might be coastal thing, because the guys he talked to were east coast guys. i don't really know because i'm totally west coast, but it's an interesting observation. oh, but he doesn't use the asthetics excuse, his best friend growing up wasn't circ'ed and he got plenty of play before he got married, lol. i think that after he learns of all the BAD things that are possible he'll reconsider and understand more why it shouldn't be his choice to begin with. it's just that he doesn't know, and no one has ever challenged that before me.
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#42 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 11:36 AM
 
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Just to chime in, my DH was born and raised on the East Coast and was glad his mother left him intact. He has several friends who grew up around here that feel the same way.

I'm always totally baffled by adult men who claim they wish they were circ'd at birth but then never actually get themselves circ'd as adults. It kind of invalidates their whole argument, like if you hate being intact so much but are still afraid to have the surgery done, doesn't that show exactly how bad the procedure is?

Alison: BFing, BWing, ERFing mama to KidA (12/25/07) and KidO (6/26/10) nocirc.giffamilybed2.gif

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#43 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 01:55 PM
 
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Tell him you know a whooooooole bunch of women who think men with intact penises are sexy.

And just don't do it. Not his body. Not his decision. Period.
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#44 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 02:43 PM
 
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The way I see it, a man who was left intact at birth can go and get circed as an adult if he chooses. It's not quite as simple the other way around.

Yes restoration is possible but time consuming and does not give back everything that was taken (although it is an improvement)

I read recently about a man who did get circed as an adult just because he felt "uncomfortable about having a foreskin- he said it was the biggest mistake of his life, as his sexual sensation was greatly reduced.
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#45 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 03:12 PM
 
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Also restoration DOES NOT give a man his foreskin back, it only stretches the remaining skin he has to cover the glans. Once the foreskin is gone it's gone.

Here's a list of what is lost:
http://www.cirp.org/pages/parents/lostlist/

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#46 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 04:50 PM
 
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Although people often use the (made-up) excuse that it's easier on a baby, adults get adequate pain relief (which most babies dont get), and adults don't have to have the foreskin forcibly separated from the glans, as babies do (b/c in infants it's fused, but in adults, it has naturally separated).

A boy born today is going to be less likely to desire a circumcision when he grows up because there are so many more intact boys now that the old myths about foreskins being gross or weird are just not going to be prevalent like they were in the past. Now, an intact boy is not going to be the only one. He's going to be like about half his peers.

There's a reason that the men you are talking about didn't accept their genitals the way they were. The reason is that our culture has maligned the foreskin for so long. European, Canadian, Australian, Japanese, Brazilian, Chinese, Indian, etc. men don't hate their foreskins, because they haven't been brainwashed all their lives to think that intact is hideous. Now, American culture is changing. At the very least, it iss seen as a reasonable, healthy, and ethical choice to leave a boy intact. Hopefully, it will soon be seen by the majority as the best choice. I have a feeling that when the almost 50% of boys that are being left whole grow up, they will set the world straight on the value of the foreskin!
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#47 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 07:03 PM
 
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Others have more than covered this topic, but I just wanted to add that if your son is informed about the functions/etc of the foreskin, it is very, very unlikely that he will be upset that the most sensitive part of his penis wasn't cut off when he was a newborn, you know?

A little bit of education goes a long way. I'd be willing to bet that the men your dh knows who aren't happy about being intact/were circumcised as adults, are pretty much clueless about the functions of the foreskin, etc.

You can make sure your son knows what circumcision is and how it harms, as well as making sure he knows all of the functions of the foreskin and how important it is.

He'll be thankful that he was left with his whole body.

This is just something that I find so difficult, though - the fact that American boys should be grateful for not being cut up at birth. I know they should be, because their parents have protected them, and they were more fortunate than many other little boys - but their whole penis is THEIRS, not anyone else's.

And only they should decide if they want a healthy, functioning part of it cut off (I know you know this - I'm just in the mood to rant a bit!).

Here's the Vulnerability of Men article, since I don't think it's been linked to yet. SHould help you understand where your dh is coming from:

http://www.udonet.com/circumcision/v...ty_of_men.html
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#48 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 07:39 PM
 
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Although people often use the (made-up) excuse that it's easier on a baby, adults get adequate pain relief (which most babies dont get), and adults don't have to have the foreskin forcibly separated from the glans, as babies do (b/c in infants it's fused, but in adults, it has naturally separated).
VERY good point.
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#49 of 49 Old 07-17-2007, 09:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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so pretty much... i love all the input everyone is putting up here. some of it i have learned for myself and some of it is new information that i wouldn't otherwise have access to, as the only intact male i know i no longer speak with. so it's good to get points of views from people who are intact/have intact children and all that goes along with it! i'm a sponge, i'm soaking, i'm soaking!!
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