Anti-Circ Resource Email - Mothering Forums
View Poll Results: Instant Feedback Poll (select all that apply)
This email was helpful 26 100.00%
This email was not helpful 0 0%
It could use some work (please explain how below) 4 50.00%
After reading it, my friend/relative decided not to circ 1 12.50%
After reading it, my friend/relative is still undecided about circ'ing 0 0%
After reading it, my friend/relative decided to circ anyways 1 12.50%
I wanted this email for myself, and I won't be circ'ing 7 87.50%
I wanted this email for myself, and I'm still going to circ 0 0%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 8. You may not vote on this poll

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#1 of 34 Old 08-02-2008, 01:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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In case you don't know my story, I circ'd my first son. After joining MDC and learning truth about circumcision; I became extremely anti-circ. Over time I've noticed that, quite often, people are very protective of their "right" to circumcise, making anti-circ conversations extremely difficult to have. People want to tell their expectant friend/relative, but they fear being too overbearing and having the person shut out the possibility of not circ'ing.

I wanted to do something about this, so I've created an email that has information with common misconceptions and reasons that people circumcise, complete with links to information.

So, if you want a copy to send to someone you know who's expecting, or if you just want to see what I wrote; PM me with your email address and I'll forward you a copy. Then, if you could, please come back to this thread and give me some feedback.

Thanks.

---------------------------------------------------------
FAQ's

You said you sent me a copy, but I didn't get it. It's possible the the email was directed to your junk mail folder instead of your inbox. If it's not there either, re-send me your email address and I'll forward it to you again. I get a lot of requests for this email,and in replying to many at once, I might have missed you; or there may have been a typo in your email address the first time around.

I requested a copy; but I haven't received one, nor have I heard anything from you. (Ok, nobody's asked this yet, but I figured I should 'reply' just in case it happens) It's possible that your PM never made it to my message box. If you think that may be the case, feel free to send your request again. But please understand that I often respond to a lot of requests at once, and you may end up with two copies and two reply PM's telling you I've sent it. The other thing is; I don't have much time to spend on the computer since I have a newborn, and once he's mobile, I'll have even less time. I try to reply to my PM's every couple days at the most, but it's possible that I just haven't had time to send it yet.

Is it okay with you if I edit (change/add/delete) what you've wrote before I send it to my friend/family member? Absolutely. But please, if you have something to add, let me know so I can put it in the email and share it with everyone. If a link doesn't work, let me know so I can find a new source. I appreciate any and all feedback.

Can I print the email and give it to my friend/family member? It's not *really* printable. I mean, it is; but the email version is way better because there are many links that are important for the recipient to follow. However, if it's difficult to get the person an electronic copy; then giving them the print-out would be the next best thing.




WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#2 of 34 Old 08-02-2008, 04:18 PM
 
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My son is intact and I am VERY anti-circ. I sent this to my sis who is to say the least very mainstream and I think that she may circ. I hope that the info contained in the email will show her the truth about circ and convince her to spare her son that torture. Thank you for the time and energy you put into this.
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#3 of 34 Old 08-02-2008, 04:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by springmama View Post
...Thank you for the time and energy you put into this...
You're welcome, and thank YOU for caring about your nephew enough to get the info for your sister. Intactivism is a community effort. Together, we can reach more people.

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#4 of 34 Old 08-03-2008, 09:01 AM
 
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It was great, thank-you.
Fortunatly I didn't have to use it because she is not planning on circing her new addition:
The only thing that I would add would be about overzealous cleaning and forcable retraction contributing to "problems" with intact men of the previous generation. That was what got my grandma to understand and quickly quieted my MIL who went on about so and so who had multiple infections in his foreskin and ended up being circed in his 30's
Other than that I found it to be very helpful and complete.

Mommy to Petunia 11/04 Bug 10/06 Button 11/09 and  Sweetie pea 12/11 DW to J :

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#5 of 34 Old 08-04-2008, 01:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2two babes View Post
...she is not planning on circing her new addition...
Awesome.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2two babes View Post
...The only thing that I would add would be about overzealous cleaning and forcable retraction contributing to "problems" with intact men of the previous generation...
Great idea. Thanks for the feedback.

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#6 of 34 Old 08-04-2008, 04:34 PM
 
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I have not read all the way through the email, but don't worry, I will be keeping it and reading it thoroughly when I get a chance!!

From what I read, it looks like it covers a lot of areas, and hopefully if someone was really trying to make a decision, they would read through it.

I would worry about it being too lengthy if someone were not really wanting the info in the first place... but then, if someone was not wanting the info, it doesn't matter WHAT you tell them sometimes. :

Good work!!
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#7 of 34 Old 08-05-2008, 11:08 AM
 
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Can you post the text?

Expecting a boy? Be sure to check out MDC's Case Against Circumcision!
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#8 of 34 Old 08-05-2008, 07:21 PM
 
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What you did was amazing!

It sent chills up my spine!

Thank you for composing this. I'm archiving it for future resorces and will be sending it along to my sister who I know will have children one day. She is already against it, but I just don't trust anyone who grew up in the American culture anymore. I would've sent this to the mother who already circ'd her son mid July. Its too late for her now. I sent her the message in many different ways. I really tried. She is now a "Nervous Wreck" waiting for it to heal. I'll send her the complication links that are included in your letter. It'll be a resource for her to watch closely for.

At least I didn't just NOT say something. I have to keep reminding myself that.
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#9 of 34 Old 08-07-2008, 10:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yay! One person (at this point) who decided not to circ after reading the email. Keeping my fingers crossed for more!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by My*Scorpio View Post
Can you post the text?
I'm sorry, I can't.

I mean, I COULD, but it would take me a fairly long time (and time is definitely lacking for me, just having had a new baby and all ). A lot of the words are linked to different sites for reference. Also, if you then wanted to send it to someone (which is the purpose, really, I want to make it easy for people to approach their friends/family about this delicate and often explosive topic); you'd have to re-attach the links all manually again. It's really just easier to forward you a copy.

I do solemnly swear not to use/sell/give out your information, if that's what you're worried about.


Quote:
Originally Posted by fruitful womb View Post
...What you did was amazing!...It sent chills up my spine!...
Thank you! I hope it sends chills enough down some spines of those considering circumcision. You're right too, about wanting to send it to your sister just in case. If she's already against it, it can't hurt. Plus, there's probably stuff in there that she doesn't know yet (like the sale of foreskin, and foreskin in face cream).

Thank you, everyone, for your comments and feedback. Please remember to send a copy to friends/family who are expecting a girl too; as there's always the possibility of their child being a *surprise* boy, and the possibility of a boy in the future!! Let's keep reaching people!

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#10 of 34 Old 08-08-2008, 02:36 AM
 
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Wonderful!!! I am going to borrow some of your email for one that I am in the process of writing. Thank you for sharing this information!!! I love the way you are able to get the facts across without putting a judgmental tone. Good work!
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#11 of 34 Old 08-10-2008, 03:18 AM
 
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I really appreciate you sharing your research and information. It is very well presented and I'm happy to report that when I shared it with my SIL who had recently told me she was planning on circ'ing, she and her husband changed their minds. Success!! Thank you so much!!
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#12 of 34 Old 08-10-2008, 11:33 PM
 
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DIYer mama to DD 11/00 and DS 6/05- both intact, naturally!
...missing Mothering Magazine...
 
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#13 of 34 Old 08-11-2008, 12:57 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommoo View Post
...I'm happy to report that when I shared it with my SIL who had recently told me she was planning on circ'ing, she and her husband changed their minds...
YAY! I'm so happy to hear this! It feels so good to be a part of helping someone change their minds and spare their sons. to those of you who've shared my writing with others, thank you for allowing me to participate in your anti-circ discussions.

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#14 of 34 Old 08-11-2008, 02:20 AM
 
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I received it and skimmed it but have been too busy to sit and read the whole thing. What I've read looks wonderful though! I don't know anyone currently expecting (a boy) but I do plan on sharing with others when appropriate. I think your situation is very helpful for expecting parents, given that you have both circed and intact children.

Mom &  RN   intactivist.gif
Pardon the typos - CWOK (cat walking on keyboard)   signcirc1.gif

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#15 of 34 Old 08-14-2008, 04:40 PM
 
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I just want to thank you again for putting together such a wonderful resource. In particular, I wanted to commend you on the gentle, nonjudgmental tone in the email. It seems to strike just the right note. It lets the recipient know that you are providing this information b/c you want them to be fully aware as they make their choices and that, ultimately, you want to spare them pain. So well written.

Thanks again for sharing this with all of the mamas here!
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#16 of 34 Old 08-15-2008, 02:25 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueMoonBean View Post
...I wanted to commend you on the gentle, nonjudgmental tone in the email. It seems to strike just the right note. It lets the recipient know that you are providing this information b/c you want them to be fully aware as they make their choices and that, ultimately, you want to spare them pain....

Oh, awesome. I'm really glad you said that, because that's exactly what I was going for; and I wasn't sure if it came out that way. Thanks for the feedback.

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#17 of 34 Old 08-15-2008, 10:57 AM
 
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Just sent you a pm.
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#18 of 34 Old 08-15-2008, 12:33 PM
 
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fantasic email don't really have anything to add

Thank you

photoblogging crafty Mama to 3 boys (8/04 and twins 08/07)
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#19 of 34 Old 08-16-2008, 05:34 PM
 
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I love the email, I think It's well worth taking the time to read. Very informative. I love how you have all the links to back up what you have written. I loved where you talked about not giving a baby a nose job

A couple things that stick in my mind that you might want to put in some place are:

#1. Wash it like you would wash your finger. It"s a good visual for people and let's them really know how simple it is to care for an intact penis.

#2. It's not medically necessary, it is a cosmetic procedure.

#3. It's not the parents penis. The decision to Circ or not should be left up to the owner of the penis.

Thanks for sending me a copy.
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#20 of 34 Old 08-18-2008, 01:50 PM
 
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It looks great and I'll definitely be using it. I'll only be modifying it a bit, because I'd rather not link the person I'm sending it to to MDC. Thank you!

Newly single, chronically sleep deprived mama to my little wild thang wild.gif, born 11/17/12 

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#21 of 34 Old 09-03-2008, 02:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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...I'll only be modifying it a bit...

Sure. What to send is entirely up to you. Some people may find it too long; but you're welcome to add/delete/edit as you see fit. Please, if you have something to add; let me know - IMO you can never have too much info.


PS: I found MDC some years back by Google-ing; so your friend may happen upon this place by accident. (Just so you're aware of how easy it is to find it. )

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#22 of 34 Old 09-03-2008, 04:22 PM
 
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Thanks so much!! :
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#23 of 34 Old 09-05-2008, 12:52 PM
 
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Great job!! That would have been the first email that I would have sent the two people I tried to stop from circ'ing their infants.

Circ doesn't work! Stop the violence of circumcison. Had another UP/UC/HB in August!
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#24 of 34 Old 09-06-2008, 12:12 AM
 
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Thank you so much for putting all the work you did into this email. Hopefully it can save many infants from being circ'd.

I only wish I had gotten an email like this when I was pregnant with DS1. I'll be sending it to everyone I know who is pregnant.

Breeder Mama: = wife to an amazing man + mama to J-Bear (07/02) and E-Train (06/08), nanny to Little Bird (07/10).

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#25 of 34 Old 09-08-2008, 01:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Breeder View Post
...I only wish I had gotten an email like this when I was pregnant...

Sadly, I completely understand. Nothing haunts me more than this "choice" I made. I thought it was for the right reasons; and I was indescribably upset to find out the truth. I appreciate everyone who've thanked me for this, but the thing that means the most to me is your willingness to read what I've put together; and even more so, your willingness to share it with others. I want to give back to society what doctors are taking away - truth. I'm disgusted that doctors are willing to harm our most vulnerable for money.

WARNING: The comments and opinions expressed above do not necessarily reflect those of the community in which I reside; or those of the internet parenting network.
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#26 of 34 Old 09-11-2008, 09:42 AM
 
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Thank you so much for sending me a copy. 2 friends are pregnant and due around the same time as me. I most definitely plan to forward this on to any expectant parents who are having boy (or who don't know the gender).
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#27 of 34 Old 09-11-2008, 11:41 PM
 
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I thank you for sending me the note, and I apologize for taking so long to give the feedback I promised. The letter is great, but I voted "needs work" and the quote below sums up why. I think it's way too long to be someone's first exposure to intactivism.
Quote:
I received it and skimmed it but have been too busy to sit and read the whole thing. What I've read looks wonderful though!
I've been well-received lately with the following short note. This one could be improved by embedding one hyperlink per sentence in support of the claims made, but I think it's the right length for something that somebody hadn't asked for.

Regards,
-Ron
- - - - -

Good luck with your pregnancy and labor.

Circumcision is not endorsed by any national medical association on earth. They have reviewed it and determined that any potential benefits are outweighed by the known risks and drawbacks.

The foreskin includes over half a male's sensual pleasure-receptive nerve endings. It protects the glans and mucosa from drying and abrasion, and it provides an exquisite frictionless rolling/gliding mode of stimulation during intimacy.

The foreskin is exactly as self-cleaning as a vagina or eyelids, and it should be cared for the same way. Sterile urine leaving the body flushes the inside clean, so you only have to wipe the outside. ONLY THE OWNER should ever try to retract a foreskin because you can injure the boy's penis.

The skin is fused to the glans at birth and gradually separates over the course of about 3 - 12 years. The boy's natural curiosity (pulling on it) helps this process along. When HE is old enough and able to retract the skin, you can advise him to rinse the area with clear water.

Every mammal on earth evolved a foreskin before there was surgery, soap, or even running water. The proper care can be summed up as: Leave it alone.

Foreskin feels REALLY good. HIS body, HIS decision.

Cheers,

-Ron
HIS body, HIS decision.
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#28 of 34 Old 09-12-2008, 05:59 AM
 
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requested!

Missionary, birth-worker, midwifery student
Mama to love.gif DD (9yr), DS luxlove.gif (3yr), & 2twins.gif UC twin DDs (5yr)

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#29 of 34 Old 09-12-2008, 10:32 AM
 
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Wonderful job. It reads very smoothly. Lots of great information and not in an "in your face" kinda way. Thanks so much for sharing your insight. I know this will be helpful for me.

Three boys.  jumpers.gif
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#30 of 34 Old 09-18-2008, 06:59 PM
 
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Wow! What an amazing email! I want to use it to inform my SIL about circ, but I am afraid for a couple of reasons. #1 - She is 18 and this is an unplanned (pretty uninformed) pregnancy, so I don't want to scare the crap out of her. #2 - I am her doula and I want to be supportive of her choices. This is a dilemma I face a lot, but usually not with a family member...any suggestions?
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