I WANT TO PUKE! Not because of morning sickness either! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 07:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Uggg....I'm just so feeling like a want puke right now, because one of my x-friends saw my thread about not being able to find a suitable hb mw (needs to be a woman, be within a hour drive, accept insurance, and ability to do stitches), and called me a homebirth phony because she's has had two hb's so she must be the freaking hb police or something.


I really want an HB, especially since I had such an awful hospital birth with Bella, and still healing from it. I just feel so unfairly judged, she hasn't seen or talked to me in ages, but still has the capability of getting under my skin

~Natalie~
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#2 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 08:05 PM
 
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I don't think any of those are unreasonable things to want in a MW. Every family is different and has different needs and a different culture. Thinks like insurance and stitches don't make you a bad homebirther.
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#3 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 08:16 PM
 
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Oh gosh, try not to let it bother you. Sounds like a ridiculous thing for someone to waste energy on trying to make you feel bad.

Be confident, be happy. You have good reasons for your decisions.

Mama to 3 kids. We live in a yurt!
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#4 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 08:21 PM
 
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I need a MW that can sew, I always tear due to a collagen deficiency lol........ I am still having a homebirth but just because I REQUIRE certain things to make that home birth safer for me and/or my baby does not make my home birth any less of a home birth....... Its not like you are asking for a MW to come out with a full operating thatre kit etc, you just require certain things.

I hate it when people are so icky......

If you give birth at home then it is a home birth, if you give birth in hospital it is a hospital birth, if you give birth in a ditch then I expect that is a rather unexpected, uncomfortable ditch birth........... It doesn't matter who you are birthing with otherwise it would be called a midwife birth or a OB birth or a best friend birth........
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#5 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 09:23 PM
 
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A "homebirth phony"?!? What is WRONG with people! I'm sorry, that blows my mind...:
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#6 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 09:50 PM
 
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I really dont even understand what that means? Am I missing the point? People are just so strange sometimes. For someone that calls themself a "homebirthing mama", who is supposed to care about the health and well being of her children, you would think she would be more compassionate about how she treats other people.
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#7 of 14 Old 03-05-2008, 10:03 PM
 
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sorry about people like that. that totally irks me. in no way are your requirements for a hb mw making your homebirth experience less valid.

as an aside if you are unable to find a mw that meets your requirements what about a birthing center?
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#8 of 14 Old 03-06-2008, 12:56 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by selena_ski View Post
sorry about people like that. that totally irks me. in no way are your requirements for a hb mw making your homebirth experience less valid.

as an aside if you are unable to find a mw that meets your requirements what about a birthing center?
There are no freestanding birth centers in Illinois as of yet, because they just very recently became legal

However, I believe there is a hospital birthing center that is pretty nice around here....I'm definitely going to tour it if it comes to that!

~Natalie~
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#9 of 14 Old 03-06-2008, 01:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Good news....I just talked to a CNM that is 1.5 hours away and she said she would work something out with me. That maybe I could do prenatals on days that she has to be up my way: She was so compassionate and sweet about it. I understand why she comes so highly recommended!


I'm trying not to let what the witch said about me being phony get to me...it just all reminds me of high school...which doesn't surprise me, pretty par for the course. I'm going to bed tonight and will try to wake up with a clear mind, and not let my thoughts drift towards her negativity. Don't need anymore of that in my life!

~Natalie~
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#10 of 14 Old 03-06-2008, 01:15 AM
 
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Originally Posted by natalieadw View Post
Good news....I just talked to a CNM that is 1.5 hours away and she said she would work something out with me. That maybe I could do prenatals on days that she has to be up my way: She was so compassionate and sweet about it. I understand why she comes so highly recommended!


I'm trying not to let what the witch said about me being phony get to me...it just all reminds me of high school...which doesn't surprise me, pretty par for the course. I'm going to bed tonight and will try to wake up with a clear mind, and not let my thoughts drift towards her negativity. Don't need anymore of that in my life!

god for you! i hope it all works out.

and you are right, you need to just let go of the negativity that comes with asshat people. netty's orders!

(and i guess i am a total HB phony b/c i planned two so far and haven't managed to have either one! this time, though...this time!)
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#11 of 14 Old 03-06-2008, 01:49 PM
 
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hi, i'm sorry some someone was so mean to say that. i got my midwife through women's first on highland in aurora. i see deb riddel this time. she is the one who trained the midwife who delivered christopher. she had to stitch me. i tore naturally. sooo less painfull too.she took her time so it would heal nice. even though i had a hspital birth it was the most natural and positive birth i had so far. no iv, no being confined to bed, i ate a little food my hubby brought in.and my mw didnt abandon me at all. she even helped me get dressed after the birth. no one made me give my baby shots or drops. mercy hospital was very good about letting me birth my way.i would recommend my midwife to anyone. let me know if you have any ?'s. talk to ya soon.

Lisa wife to Ronne and mom to 4 kids ,Thomas 4/92, Amanda 9/99, Christopher 8/06 & Nathaniel 5/08.
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#12 of 14 Old 03-06-2008, 06:19 PM
 
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[QUOTE=natalieadw;10704783]Good news....I just talked to a CNM that is 1.5 hours away and she said she would work something out with me. That maybe I could do prenatals on days that she has to be up my way: She was so compassionate and sweet about it. I understand why she comes so highly recommended!


is it colleen jones in dekalb? if so she is the wonderful person who delivered lil chris. let me know who you got.

Lisa wife to Ronne and mom to 4 kids ,Thomas 4/92, Amanda 9/99, Christopher 8/06 & Nathaniel 5/08.
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#13 of 14 Old 03-07-2008, 08:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by polishprinsezz View Post
hi, i'm sorry some someone was so mean to say that. i got my midwife through women's first on highland in aurora. i see deb riddel this time. she is the one who trained the midwife who delivered christopher. she had to stitch me. i tore naturally. sooo less painfull too.she took her time so it would heal nice. even though i had a hspital birth it was the most natural and positive birth i had so far. no iv, no being confined to bed, i ate a little food my hubby brought in.and my mw didnt abandon me at all. she even helped me get dressed after the birth. no one made me give my baby shots or drops. mercy hospital was very good about letting me birth my way.i would recommend my midwife to anyone. let me know if you have any ?'s. talk to ya soon.
Thanks Lisa! You made me feel more comfortable in case I have to go with a hospital. I have heard nothing but awesome things about Deb, she would definitely be the one I would go with! I'll give you a call cause I will definitely want to pick your brain if we go that route!

[QUOTE=polishprinsezz;10710339]
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is it colleen jones in dekalb? if so she is the wonderful person who delivered lil chris. let me know who you got.
No, its actually Bernice Keutzer down in Arlington! Is Colleen Jones a CNM? Do you have contact info on her?
Tell your LO's Bella says hi!!

~Natalie~
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#14 of 14 Old 03-08-2008, 06:01 PM
 
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Don't let her get to you! You know in heart what you want and nothing else matters!

Awesome news about your MW!
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