My younger sister, 3 years, told me she was "trying" to get pregnant in January. I told her.. tell me as soon as you know bc I am so excited for you! Well, I got pregnant in february.. and I waited until she was pregnant to tell her bc I knew she might be upset if I got pregnant before her.. I knew she'd be pregnant soon bc she is young and healthy. So, last month I was going on 3 months pregnant and I couldn't hold out any longer so I told her I was pregnant.. and low and behold she tells me she is pregnant too.. (why she held out for 2 months I don't know) but I was SO EXCITED!!!! But turns out after her apppointment she is due the end of November and I am due the beginning of November... she told me this in an email.. Never called me back! And I haven't heard from her since... I must say for the record.. My heart is broken. I am so hurt that she didn't confide in me that she was pregnant for so long and then when she found out I was pregnant she stopped talking to me. Could she be that jealous? She has always been jealous of me thru our childhood/adulthood... I am the taller, prettier, more successful and am a happy, loving person and she has always been quiet, withdrawn and a loner. I have tried so hard to make our relationship stronger but it seems now it's the last straw for her... what do you think? It's been over a week since I have heard from her and I've sent emails and left voice messages..
I'm sorry you're both feeling the way you are. Maybe you can do some things along the way to really celebrate her pregnancy and make her feel special and like it's all about her for a while?
DS1: 10/89 - DD1: 06/94 - DD2: 02/97 - DS2: 12/05 - DS3: 12/08 - DC6: ETA 04/26/12
I'll be 42 when the newest little one is born! Yowza!
You didn't do anything wrong, but that doesn't mean she sees it that way.
Does either of you have a child already? While it may take her a while to "get over it," the presence of an actual living breathing beautiful baby has the amazing ability to make people forget their more petty concerns.
Maybe making a big deal over her pregnancy would help to sooth her a little. She may not be ready to hear it now, but maybe you could ask her about her plans for baby things, or something else you might "need" advice on... A letter that lets her know how excited you are to share this with her, how it makes it more special for you, might be nice.
Are your parents/relatives able to help out? If they know about the pregnancies, maybe you could make sure they're giving her lots of encouragement and exited grandparent energy. And, if anyone suggests such a thing, a joint baby shower might be the worst possible idea if she's feeling jealous and overshadowed.
We all know pregnancy is a wildly emotional time, so you may just have to hope that she'll come around in time!
Mom to (11/08) and (4/11)
So, what I'm saying is, maybe your sister, just isn't in the mood to talk. It may not have anything to do with you. But I'm sure its nerve-wrecking...Why don't you call her, ask her if she's ok. I guess that's really the only way to get to the bottom of it! Good Luck!
We told our families and haven't heard from my husband's sister...well at all. She doesn't have children and this is our second. It's so hard to know how to handle it.
I think having a sister due around the same time would be so much fun. Give her a ring I say!
Wife since 2004. Mommy to DS (2005) and DD (2008) and my hopefully VBA2C baby DD due Feb 2012!
but overall it is great to have children so close in age. They are really close for 1 and 1/2 years old.
we got preg. within weeks of eachother, and both were excited, as were the dads, but while I was in the midst of planning my wedding her SO wasn't interested in getting married at that time. Unfortunately she m/c, and then pretty much avoided me for months- because it was to painful for her. Later that year-before I had my oldest dd she did end up getting married and almost immediatly was preg again. But about a month later I had my baby, and she avoided me again until she had hers. She told me later that she felt so bad about avoiding me when I was preg. because she was jealous, that she didn't think I would want to be around her when she was. Funny thing is I would have loved to have been there for her preg. She was pretty much my only friend-our guys where both military, and so I was in a town where I knew no-one else. It was a very isolating experience. I guess I am saying I was glad, I didn't write her off, but was patience, because once we had talked it out, our friendship was stronger than ever.
My best friend was really jealous when I got engaged and when I found out I was pregnant with my DD. I know it was because she was just at an insecure place in life... plus EVERYONE, absolutely EVERYONE, who knows the two of us...they all assumed she'd get married and have babies first. Thankfully she is at a much more confident place in her life now and was SO excited for me when I told her I was preggo with baby #2.
Keep positive and be willing to be the one to reach out more. You'll never regret that!
My sister had cervical cancer issues when her son was about 6 and she wasn't sure she was ever gonna be able to have another baby...and always wanted a little girl. I got pg with Aja during that time and man did I feel HORRIBLE. She didn't quit talking to me, although I could feel her pain. She did, though go on to have a cute little boy in 2006.
But maybe she isn't looking at the brighter side...the cousins will be close in age, you guys can have playdates and they can grow up together. You can share pregnancy journeys, go out for icecream, or go shopping for baby things together...
I'm hoping every gets better for you two. A sister is an important person to have in your life. I know.
2 angels in Heaven (Alexis & Bryson)
Currently NTNP for baby #4
I'm sorry that you are going through this momma, it's hard not having the support system at this point in time. Maybe she will turn around and ya'll can bask in this wonderful time together! Just dont push her, that might make it worse.
I think it just hurt so much bc I have been working so hard to keep a strong relationship for YEARS now and she just never seems to try.. I always call her..etc. I am the more sensitive one I guess bc it really bothers me. I think having babies so close (they'll be less than a month) is the MOST exciting thing ever... but I guess that's just me! It's comforting to hear that some of you have gone thru similar situations.. I guess it is just the hormones in pregnancy that make us temporary insane
I am going to call her and kill her with kindness and love (like some of you said to do) and hope that she'll come around!! Thanks so much girls!