Last Minute(ish) Panics - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-10-2008, 06:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What's yours?

Last night, as I was trying to go to sleep, it hit me that I have NO CLUE what I am going to wear during labor/birth(homebirthing). I seriously worried about it for at least half an hour. If you have homebirthed before, what did you wear?

belly.gifLesli: Wife to Jon, Mommy to my treasures, Kyla(Feb 06), Erin (Nov 08), and "Beanie" due 01/12! We're a home centered family! Homebirth, homecooking, homemade homegrown, and homeschooling!!

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Old 10-10-2008, 06:39 PM
 
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This is my first baby but I'm planning to wear a sports bra and a comfy flowy skirt and a tank top, or maybe just a tank top with a built in shelf bra and some yoga pants. I don't want to be topless if I can help it because I may eventually want to show the birth pictures to my family.

My last minute panic is really this: I have NO idea what kind of nursing supplies I need. So far I have three nursing bras, no nursing tops at all, and no lanolin or nursing pads or accessories. Does anyone have a bare minimum must-haves list for a first-time nursing mother? I checked out the breastfeeding forum but it confused me to pieces and I don't have time to attend LLL meetings.

Also I just now ordered mittens, sweaters, and a footed bundler for him. Before that we would have had no real way to protect him from the elements outside. I hope the stuff arrives in time... :

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Old 10-10-2008, 07:06 PM
 
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I just started thinking about what I might wear, too. I need to find a good length skirt somewhere in my closet, I want to be able to squat as necessary! I like the tank top idea. I've got a pseudo sports bra that might work, too. My MIL will be around and that's my biggest concern.

As for the bf supplies, pea, with dd, I thought I had what I needed and then it turned out to be the wrong stuff for me. I had a hand pump, a nursing tank, two nursing bras, lanolin, nursing pads, a boppy, and a couple of books. I started off with low supply due to a partially retained placenta so I really needed an electric pump to continue to build supply (I was pumping after every feeding for 20 minutes). Hand pump did not get used. Did not need a nursing top, just lifted up my tops. Nursing bras were good, but I found it easier to wear a lighter sports bra and just lift it up with my shirt. Lanolin didn't seem to help nipple soreness with me very much. Because of low supply, I did not leak and never used a nursing pad. And the boppy was too hard--I ended up buying a softer more expensive v-shaped pillow. I also bought herbs to help boost my supply. I was a little disappointed in the instructions in some of the books I had, too. What I really needed was a real live person around to help me.
Anyway, don't mean to make this sound all negative--most moms probably use the same stuff, I just had a weird situation. In order to save on some potentially unneeded things, though, I suggest going with what you have, start breastfeeding, and then go out and buy (or rather, get someone else to go out and buy) whatever else you might need when you need it.
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Old 10-10-2008, 07:29 PM
 
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I think one of the best parts about a homebirth is that you can wear whatever you feel most comfy in. If it's your favorite college sweatshirt that's full of holes...go for it! You feel the need to strut your stuff in the buff... that's ok too. Trust me...your midwives/birth assistant will not care one bit....mine doesn't. I would pick what ever it is that you wear on a lazy day that you're just bumming around the house in.

Personally, I'm going with a colorful tie dyed shirt and some jersey shorts until my water breaks or I get in the pool. Then I'll be in my comfy blue bra. I wore similar while I labored at home with DD.

peainthepod... here's what I started with when I had DD and what I'm starting with now...I think we're pretty bare minimum.
3 nursing bras - one to wear, one in the wash, one to change into
12 nursing pads (6 pair) - these are the rewashable kind. I got some from Bravado
1 tube of quality lanolin for the nipples
some clean washcloths to put warm water on for engorgement relief or to express on. (it took me a while to get the hang of hand expression into a container)
I bought a nursing tank this time as well..but I don't think you have to have it. Pretty nice though.

ETA: nursing pillow!
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Old 10-10-2008, 07:42 PM
 
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That is very helpful information--thank you so much, mamas! :

I forgot to add that I do have a Boppy that someone gave us as a shower gift. So that helps.

Thanks again. <3

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Old 10-10-2008, 10:29 PM
 
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I wore no shirt, a slip and then when I got in the pool and got and out of the pool I wore nothing. I had lanolin that I did not use, nursing pads that I did not use, No pump until later, a bobby and a bunch of pillows I constantly had to rearrange and a few nursing bras that I wore while pregnant. I think it is best to remember that nursing will be hard in the begininng. I remeber looking at my baby's face and thinking that his head was smaller than my boob and his mouth was smaller than my areola. So I think get stuff that seems helpful and then have people who will be willing to go buy stuff you may need when the time comes. I would say most important thing is to have access to people who have nursed before who will help you.

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Old 10-10-2008, 10:40 PM
 
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Same here, myra. I didn't have any "supplies" for nursing, except for two nursing bras. I never used lanolin, never used a pump, or nursing pads. I think those things you can totally wait on to see if you need/want them. I did use a boppy, though, and was glad I had one.

As for what have I been panicking about? Having THREE kids!!!

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Old 10-10-2008, 11:28 PM
 
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i only have one diaper!
I SERIOUSLY HAVE TO GO BUY DIAPERS!

Bethanie, Single Mama to Clementine Aislyn born via waterbirth.jpguc.jpg on 11/23/08. Hoping to homeschool.gif We cd.gifsaynovax.gif
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Old 10-10-2008, 11:52 PM
 
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I am going to wear the one skirt I currently like to wash and wear every day, and a tank top. Once I am in the pool I will just wear one of my nursing bras - they look almost like a sports bra and feel like a swim top.

I'm worrying about who will take photos and who will look after my 2yo.

eta: nursing supplies... I have EMAB nipple butter, some nursing bras, a hand me down single electric Medela pump that I used a few times with DS, and some EMAB booby tubes... filled with flax seed and good to either freeze or to warm. With DS I didn't have those but they seemed like a small luxury to me. I'd like to get some bravado nursing tanks seeing as I am an F cup but they are so expensive... apparently they are well worth it though.

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Old 10-11-2008, 01:52 AM
 
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Nursing essentials for me are just nursing bras. I have one ancient one (from DD!) that still works, not a lot of support, but some. And a Playtex that doesn't fit perfectly, but works. I want one more that fits well, trying to budget the $40 that it costs at the shop over here. I never used Lansinoh, I found that tea bags soothe sore nipples, as do cabbage leaves, and when mine got really sore...some burn gel. All things you can find at your local grocery.

Last minute panics...I'm right there with Augustine! THREE kids! and Going back to school in January...The whole thought makes me want to panic. We have a crib, a highchair, diapers, clothes, a changing table, a bathtub, a swing, all sorts of "stuff". We are super prepared for a baby.

But what about sleeping and showers and meals? Those have all gotten to be things that I've found important the last few years. It's one thing to be sleep deprived at 23...but another at 31. So thats what I worry about in the middle of the night. What will I *DO* with a baby???

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Old 10-11-2008, 02:37 AM
 
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Cabbage leaves WILL lower your supply, and should only be used with a well-established supply for specific problems. I was freakin' Elsie, but when I used them, even I noticed a dip in supply. Sorry for the PSA, but I think it's important.

Whatever you buy for sore nipples, consider buying organic. I won't use Lansinoh or other lanolin producst because the contribute to thrush not healing well, and I prefer organics like Earth Mama Angel Baby Nipple butter. I do use sposie breast pads though, but that's just because I have been in the trenches with yeast and I know my reusable breast pads harbored the nasty beasties. If I get through a few months yeast free, I might buy some.
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Old 10-11-2008, 01:48 PM
 
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Cabbage leaves WILL lower your supply, and should only be used with a well-established supply for specific problems. I was freakin' Elsie, but when I used them, even I noticed a dip in supply. Sorry for the PSA, but I think it's important.
Interesting, thanks for the info! I'd never heard that, nor ever noticed it. With the other 2 kids I had such a supply that I probably could have fed 2 other babies, and the engorgement was so bad that at one point I was holding ice cubes to my breasts...This time I know will be a whole different ballgame because of the reduction.

"Listen, are you breathing just a little and calling it a life?"~Mary Oliver

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Old 10-11-2008, 07:41 PM
 
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freaking out about:
food in the freezer (I have so many allergies! I'm so jealous at everyone else's lists of frozen chicken manicotti or whatever. what the hell am I going to make to have on hand??);
diapers (have about 20 and they're all way to huge for a newborn);
diapering in general (I want to do EC but I'm worried dh isn't on-board and that it's going to be too hard in community - you'd think it would be easier here but nakey-butt kids aren't allowed in public indoor spaces);
the height of my bed (it's high);
not having a wrap dh is going to want to use that won't hurt his back...yet he still goes skateboarding...grrr...;
whether baby is in the right position;
which kind of tub to rent/buy;
hmm...oh and work stuff. Freaking out that I won't have cleared my schedule and then I'll suddenly go into labor.

I'll probably wear whatever I've already got on to labor in until it gets real hard and then I'll likely take whatever that is off. I hadn't even thought about the lanolin stuff. Or nursing pads. Ack! New stuff to freak out about!
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Old 10-11-2008, 11:27 PM
 
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I was mostly naked with a blanket or towels over me last time, I think I started out with my favorite nightgown on, I think I may wear that again till I get in the pool and then I will go in the buff. Although a bra would have enhanced all the droopy booby pictures of me in the pool last time, shoes and bras are the first things to come off when Im home, so I don't know that I will want one in labor.
I bought a few new nursing bras this time around, although I have never been a nursing bra fan, I ususally just pull up my regular bra and let my boob flop out the bottom, this is not recommended by any LC since the bra pressing on your breast could impede your milk flow and lead to clogged ducts, I have never had that problem. Anywho I did buy 2 bravados & 2 from motherhood. I have pumped and pumped and pumped in the past (went back to work!) but this time Im at home and don't plan to pump at all. And breast pads are a must if Im going out of the house.
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Old 10-12-2008, 12:12 AM
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these are the things I would like to, had written on my to do list.... still to do:
make approx 20 NB dipes
make 5 pairs of nursing bras (I already have a few)
make at least 4 more nursing tops (already have 3)
stock my freezer ( so far I've made 1 meal)
entirely clean the house
declutter the house
go through approx 12 plastic tubs of stuff

and I'm 35.5 weeks along. And I WOH. And next week I will be gone on business.

So clearly, I won't get this all done, and will be lucky if I get much of anything done. Plus I waste too much time on MDC.
So now I have adopted a new strategy... which is to not panic, and just repeat: everything will be just fine, everything will be just fine.
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Old 10-12-2008, 01:16 AM
 
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...
But what about sleeping and showers and meals? Those have all gotten to be things that I've found important the last few years. It's one thing to be sleep deprived at 23...but another at 31. So thats what I worry about in the middle of the night. What will I *DO* with a baby???
ugh. totally freaking out here too, my DS is 7 and i have two step kids and i just don't know how i will take care of them all and a baby. it's scary.

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Old 10-12-2008, 02:19 AM
 
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I was naked most of my last birth or wearing a robe.


I panic about how I will manage to homeschool with a baby to care for.
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Old 10-12-2008, 04:42 AM
 
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I am freaking out about....WHERE I will even be to have this baby!!! We don't even know what city we'll be living in! I am 34 weeks (almost) so at least I'm at the end of the month, but knowing we're probably still moving and I'll probably still have to find a new doc/midwife between now and then is starting to get to me :

Kleine, I hear you about the homeschooling - I would normally take some time off from schoolwork when the baby is born, but we've already lost so much time with all the moving, we're quite behind already. Anyway, at least you can nurse or wear a sleeping newborn in a sling while hsing - right now my toddler is the big challenge while I'm trying to get the girls' schoolwork done, so I am hoping no one will be worse than he is - LOL.

As far as nursing "stuff" - I always suggest that less is more - there's virtually nothing you *need* unless you end up with special circumstances. And if you unfortunately do, you can always send DH or grandma or whomever out to buy a pump, Lansinoh, Soothies, etc. One of the best things about nursing is that it's free! The only things I consider essential are nursing bras (I'm pretty big on top so I'm picky about bras - I need a lot of support!) and nursing pads (I used disposables because I leak a TON). Nursing dresses are nice if you like to wear dresses, since it really is hard to nurse in a regular dress without getting half-naked but I don't usually bother with nursing tops (unless I happen to love the top anyway) because you can pretty much nurse in any kind of regular top.

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Old 10-12-2008, 08:47 PM
 
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i plan on wearing whatever i secretly want to get rid of, so i won't mind if it gets messed up. dh would probably nominate my ugly purple sweats. when things really get going, i'm going nude. i don't want anything between the baby and i when it's birthed.
although, i'm making dh wear his "95% human" t-shirt with a picture of a monkey face on front as a reminder to me to let my body do it's work without interference from my brain.

as for nursing supplies, if it wasn't given to me for free (which quite a lot was since ds had a homebirth last november) i probably won't get anything until i see if i really need it. then i'll send dh out. or go get it myself.

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Old 10-13-2008, 01:48 AM
 
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For nursing I had/have three nursing bras, pads (I used a ton, by 4 days pp I was changing them every two hours and still leaking through them), Lanolin (however, I found out Im allergic so none this time), a brestfriend nursing pillow (it was great for my back), and a nightlight lamp (great for nighttime feedings since the lamp would wake up DH and he had early work times). Last time I ended up having to get a breast pump because I would get so engorged that DD wouldn't be able to latch on.

As for my worry, Im worried about leaving DD. Other than when I had to return to work for a couple of months (she was 6 weeks old- I only worked for two weeks) the longest Ive been away from her is an hour. She doesn't do well away from me so Im really worried about leaving her. Also, I worry about taking care of her and the baby. Shes been very high needs/clingy lately and I don't know how Im going to take care of two at teh same time.

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Old 10-13-2008, 04:34 AM
 
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All I need for nursing is a rocking chair, and my boobs.I do want to say, it would be well worth your time to make a few LLL meetings,knowing people with experience to ask or relate to is really a priceless gem in the world of breastfeeding.

As far as what to wear in labor, I'm usually naked by the time our mw gets to our house, so I'm thinking nothing.

And for freaking out-My biggest for this hour is that we have not gotten our birth supplies yet!Tee-Hee.We have arranged with our mw to bring them for the home visit, but that's in mid nov, and what if it's early?By some first-time freak chance?
I'm also feeling very unprepared emotionally or mentally.I have a lot of big knots to untie, and this whole insomnia thing is SO not helping....
And then there are the 2 birthdays comming up-one on halloween and the other on election day, and then Thanksgiving....I'm really thinking I'm going to be out of it at that point...I will not be making anything happen as far as that.Sorry.
I have not washed any baby clothes, cos I have no where to put them!I may put them in the changing table shelves and move ds's dipes to his dresser or closet...not sure yet...I want to tackle that tomorrow.It's just too much too fast!And somewhere in there is supposed to be some form of homeschooling!
I really just need to get a grip, find some perspective and ride the wave, and enjoy....
And sleep...

:::
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Old 10-13-2008, 05:18 AM
 
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If you have homebirthed before, what did you wear?
Nada. But no pictures, either. And MIL is not invited! My midwife jokes that she can tell how dialated a woman is by how naked she is!

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Does anyone have a bare minimum must-haves list for a first-time nursing mother? I checked out the breastfeeding forum but it confused me to pieces and I don't have time to attend LLL meetings.
Must-haves? Other than baby and nipples? Hm... The phone numbers for LLL and your local LC. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. Pillows. Personally, I don't do the whole nursing bra thing (small up top!). But I won't leave the house without a nursing shirt on. What works best is different for each mama! Hated my Brestfriend. Wanna try a Boppy this time. Maybe it'll work. Might just use pillows. Who knows. Used nursing pads last time, disposables and real ones. Used cloth prefolds under nursling to catch drips when nursing at home. I would love a luna blanket this time, but it's not in the budget.

As to what's freaking me out; no birth pool, no homebirth kit, no birth supplies. We have plenty of cloth diapers, but no covers. If this is a girl we have no clothes. House is a mess. DS is a toddler. DH is working 2 jobs.

Preggo hormones suck! I can't wait for baby to get here and nurse so the happy hormones will kick in!

Learning & growing & changing everyday!
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Old 10-13-2008, 06:31 AM
 
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And then there are the 2 birthdays comming up-one on halloween and the other on election day, and then Thanksgiving....I'm really thinking I'm going to be out of it at that point...I will not be making anything happen as far as that.Sorry.
I didn't even think about whats coming up.. We have our church's holloween party which DH was suppose to help with but since he has work I have too.. Elections. My birthday is the 9th, DH's is the 11th, DH's parents anniversary is November 20, our anniversary is November 26th and then Thanksgiving.. I won't even think about December yet since there is like 5 birthdays..
Umm, maybe I should get cards now

~Heather~ Mama to Miss E (1/07), Miss A (11/08), Mr.T (2/11) and Miss A (10/12) Expecting our newest blessing sometime late Sept/early Oct.. Wife to my Marine since 11/2005
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Old 10-14-2008, 10:49 PM
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I don't even remember what I wore for my first birth. I labored for three days and pushed for five hours. DH says I was naked, but then put on a tee shirt sometime after the baby came out. Whether my boobs were droopy never crossed my mind!

My last-minute panics this time around are: baby clothes for the first couple weeks when the cord is still sensitive. DD was born in summer and I think she just hung out in a diaper for a while at first, but now I don't know how to keep this baby warm while not irritating her little cord area.

The other panic is the just-in-case-of-transfer hospital bag our midwife asks us to pack. How can I keep the toiletries I use every day and the clothes I'd need to wear home in a bag for the next month? Do I just buy two of everything? Travel soap, fine, but more expensive make-up products?! And clothes--I don't even have enough clothes to wear now! Plus, I don't want to even think of transferring, so I'm putting it off.

SAHM to Ada 8/15/2006, Calla 11/22/2008, and Wright 6/16/2011

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Old 10-15-2008, 12:25 AM
 
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i think you should follow your instincts on the suggestion of your midwife to pack a just-in-case-transfer-bag. i wouldn't do it. if you do have to trabsfer it is most likely going to be a heat of the moment thing and someone else can go get you needed toiletries if you really end up staying at the hospital. i had a planned hospital birth last time and didnt bring a bag at all. i just had my mom get the stuff i wanted after my son was born. the hospital has toothbrushes, hairstuff, soap, even socks and underwear not to mention baby diapers and onesies.
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Old 10-15-2008, 12:53 AM
 
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I had DD in the winter time (well, winter time on the coast of California) and the onesies/pants/sweaters that she wore didn't irritate her umbilical cord. I never really thought about it and DD didn't like going around in a diaper (she would fuss until I put clothes on her). We had a few sweater outfits that she wore a lot with a long sleeve onesie under.. at night she wore a sleeper.. She was swaldled all the time since thats what she prefered.

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Old 10-15-2008, 01:46 AM
 
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i think you should follow your instincts on the suggestion of your midwife to pack a just-in-case-transfer-bag. i wouldn't do it. if you do have to trabsfer it is most likely going to be a heat of the moment thing and someone else can go get you needed toiletries if you really end up staying at the hospital. i had a planned hospital birth last time and didnt bring a bag at all. i just had my mom get the stuff i wanted after my son was born. the hospital has toothbrushes, hairstuff, soap, even socks and underwear not to mention baby diapers and onesies.
I agree. I refuse to pack a just-in-case bag for transfer. If I transfer it will be for an emergency only reason and in that case I could care less (nor will I think about) a packed bag. I'm only focusing on the positive and I won't put any energy into thinking about the negative.
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Old 10-15-2008, 03:09 PM
 
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I'm stressing that labor will really get going while DH is at work, he works 2 1/2 hours away, I'm also worried that he will be in a meeting if I try to call and not be able to answer the phone or get away in time.

I'm not as stressed about who will watch the kids, because my oldest dd is 14 and she can watch them in a pinch. she already does this for doc. appointments, and has been working out really well.

I have not finished my planned to do list, I still haven't finished sewing the newborn diapers I have cut out, have finished 4, and I have at least 6 still waiting to be sewn. my house is still not clean, we are behind on the laundry, and the yard work-preping for cold weather, and I haven't made a single meal to put in the freezer.

and oh, I am so with the pp's who are homeschooling, its been challenging enough to HS 3 with a 2 year old, but adding a baby to the mix, and I have some concerns about my coping skills. lately I have resorted to alot more book work, and less hands on stuff, just because I have been so tired. I am hoping that some of the life management skills I have been trying to instill them will carry us through.



for nursing stuff, with my first I didn't have a boppy or a pump, or any special creams. I used tea bags and a dish towel for nipple soreness, and to help heal cracks and sooth blisters. My OB recommended that and it worked wonders for me. I had three nursing bras and some washable pads, but when I was engorged, I just used a wash cloth or a hand towel over my breasts. As for special clothes, anything loose, or that buttons up the front will work. I have a couple of nursing tops, I have gotten about one or two with every kid but most of the time, I just wear something I know I can get the baby under.
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Old 10-15-2008, 05:17 PM
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I had DD in the winter time (well, winter time on the coast of California) and the onesies/pants/sweaters that she wore didn't irritate her umbilical cord.
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i think you should follow your instincts on the suggestion of your midwife to pack a just-in-case-transfer-bag. i wouldn't do it. ... i had a planned hospital birth last time and didnt bring a bag at all. i just had my mom get the stuff i wanted after my son was born.
Quote:
I agree. I refuse to pack a just-in-case bag for transfer. If I transfer it will be for an emergency only reason and in that case I could care less (nor will I think about) a packed bag. I'm only focusing on the positive and I won't put any energy into thinking about the negative.
Thanks! You guys are awesome, and I feel so much better already. :

As far as nursing stuff, I had 4 nursing bras, some Lansinoh, a Brest Friend (priceless!), and some loose/button-up shirts. Ditto a PP on The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. I also had a good pump and some steamer bags and a bottle brush because I was going to return to work. Most important to me was that I had found a good support system/lactation consultant prior to birth--I needed to see the consultant a couple times in the early weeks to really get the latch right. Never used nursing pads or official nursing clothes or other sundries.

SAHM to Ada 8/15/2006, Calla 11/22/2008, and Wright 6/16/2011

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