Got in a vax debate after baby shower :) - Mothering Forums
I'm Not Vaccinating > Got in a vax debate after baby shower :)
larkedyflarp's Avatar larkedyflarp 12:13 PM 04-19-2009
After my aunts baby shower yesterday at my dad/step mom's house I had to stick around because the weather was horrible and there was flooding around.

Anyway so it was me, my step-mom, my aunt, and a lady who has been a friend of the family forever, she has a very Martha Stewart personality.

So she starts saying how her D-I-L was worried about kids that weren't vaccinated, putting her child, the family friend's grandson at risk. I figured what the heck, I've been studying vaccines for over 3 years now why not....

First thing I did was gesture to my big healthy happy 5 month old that my step-mom was holding and say "he's not vaccinated"..... There was silence for a minute there

Then I said if the DIL believes in vaccines then she shouldn't be worried about unvaccinated kids.

The family friend brings up polio and how one of our US presidents etc. etc. I say 90% of polio is flu like symptoms and people completely recover.

She ask if I was vaccinated as a child and I said yes, but when I was a child there was DTaP, Polio and MMR and that was it, now kids are getting like 80 vaccines and they've added three more since my 3 year old was a baby (some combo ones) before they start school, it's a multi billion dollar industry and most of the diseases they are vaccinating for are ridiculous, if the mother doesn't have hepatitis, then the baby DOESN'T need a hepatitis shot. While diptheria is a serious disease, our cousin has had rotavirus 4 times and it's no big deal (dehydration can be a big deal in other countries I know where rehydration isn't easy).

She says when I was young people died of measles (most people from this generation says measles was no biggie). But I said when I was little we had chicken pox and it was no big deal but once they created a vaccine for it all of a sudden it's a "deadly disease"!

My step-mom did ask well, can't parents choose if they don't want all the vaccines and I said yes, but most parents don't they just follow whatever the schedule is at the time without learning about what each illness is or dong any research. The fact that my 47 year old step mom would even ask this made me think that maybe this little debate may have sparked someone to even THINK that there is more than meets the eye with all this stuff.

Anyay, I don't really like to argue with people, in fact I hate it really, but when the family friend started talking about unvaccinated people putting her grandson at risk I had to jump in and throw a facts out there in an attempt to open a few minds and getting people thinking a little.

Who knows what rumors are going to go around now? Oh well, if people start asking questions I'll start giving what answers I know and recommending books.

I should've mentioned one of my cousin's who is a doctor, that they all know well, that I talked to about vaccinations before I was pregnant with my son told me that even he didn't think any vaccinations besides the DTaP and Hib were necessary and that's big him being a young doctor with all the vaccinations out there. His son is two and hasn't gotten MMR. If doctor's are questioning for their kids, seems obvious others should. Of course I forgot to throw that out there yesterday

just_lily's Avatar just_lily 02:16 AM 04-20-2009
I have totally given up talking to people about this, unless I think they may be at least somewhat receptive. I really have no desire to just bang my head against a brick wall.

Most recently it was at Easter dinner with my DF's family. My DD has just started to take a lot of interest in solids, so I was feeding her off of my plate and was talking to my MIL about the "new" feeding rules for baby, and how things have changed over the years. I mentioned that I hadn't given DD egg yet because I can't remember if it is the yolk or the white that she can't have, and for the life of me I can't remember why either. So I just don't.

My SIL piped in that I *had" to give her egg before her 12-month shots or else "they just won't give them to her". But of course she doesn't know what shot, or why.

My DF gave me an "oh dear, here we go" look from accross the table. I just said "yeah, they grow the MMR in egg," and left it at that.

This was the same woman who told me when I was pregnant that the best way to tell if I was in labour is to take a Tylenol, and if you throw it up you are in labour. I mean really, WTF? It was just so not worth the effort to bring up the vax discussion that day.
mamadelbosque's Avatar mamadelbosque 10:33 AM 04-20-2009
Outside of my immediate family (my mom & dad), the only people I have ever discussed vaxes with are actually DH's old friend & his gf from high school... she's pregnant now and due in like june, and they brought it up while we were there over easter, and it was just *SO* freaking cool to talk to people who have researched vaxes too and decided that they're nutty.... It made me feel SOO good. I don't usually share that DS' not vaxed with anyone... when it comes up in casual conversation at playgroups I tend to get evasive and just smile and nod. I really don't want to be the 'wierd/bad mom' around here, yk?
larkedyflarp's Avatar larkedyflarp 11:02 AM 04-20-2009
I see what y'all are saying. This was just my step-mom, a family friend who's known me my entire life and my aunt. They all know I'm a great mom so I don't worry about that.

We do have a medical exemption anyway though. After my daughter's anaphylaxis the pediatrician made a letter for me stating her reaction and that she should be exempt and that any siblings she has have an increased risk of a similar reaction.

Maybe having that opens doors for me to talk about it more openly without worrying as much?
just_lily's Avatar just_lily 09:32 PM 04-20-2009
I don't worry.... I just can't be bothered. There is a big difference. If I thought that anyone would actually be open to hearing what I have to say, then I LOOOOVE to talk about this subject. I just don't see much point in talking if nobody is willing to listen.