Going meet a new pedi...what to say? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 14 Old 10-05-2010, 04:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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In my head, I tell her we don't vaccinate, show her all my research, we go through it together, and by the end of our converstation, she is "anti vaccine" as well.

Clearly, that won't happen. We want to be up front with her because our oldest has had just a couple vaccines and our youngest (4 months) none. I have no plans to get any in the future and don't want to be lectured or told that they jsut had a baby die from "insert vpd here" every time I bring them in.

I'd avoid WBV's altogether, but I feel they are important, so we'll be denying vaccines quite a bit over the next year.

Do I just meet her and tell her- or just say we're holding off...never had to do this before as our old pedi never asked us a thing about it.

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." ~Mark Twain

 


 
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#2 of 14 Old 10-05-2010, 05:00 PM
 
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If/when it comes up, just answer that you don't vax. If the doctor pushes, say you'd rather not discuss it, but that you are very comfortable with your decision. You will know from their reaction if this is going to be an ongoing problem or not.

But I would call ahead and check what the office policies are before you go. Why waste a co-pay just to be told they won't care for your children?
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#3 of 14 Old 10-05-2010, 08:29 PM
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Definitely call ahead to check their policy on non-vax'ing patients. Our first ped "fired" us on the spot

PhDin' mama to dd (Oct. 2005)
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#4 of 14 Old 10-05-2010, 08:44 PM
 
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Definitely call ahead to check their policy on non-vax'ing patients. Our first ped "fired" us on the spot
Totally. Each time I called to ask about insurance I asked about vax status...

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#5 of 14 Old 10-09-2010, 04:26 PM
 
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I would defniitely discuss this prior to going! Do you have a decent amount of doctors in your location? If so, why not hold off on the appt. until you've had a chance to meet with a few and feel them out on this issue? Also, are you opposed to a family practitioner? I switched to one when my ds was 6 months old because of the vax issue and also formula pushing. She doesn't agree with no vax, but she's never pushed it and never treated us differently because of it.

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#6 of 14 Old 10-09-2010, 04:29 PM
 
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Please do yourself a favor and do not bring a bunch of literarture or arguments or try to persuade the doctor. She has a position. You have a position. It's not going to be productive for her to attempt to reason you out of yours, so why would you try this on her?

Simply state your position and leave it at that. If she is willing to have you as a patient, you shouldn't get lectures at this or subsequent visits.
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#7 of 14 Old 10-09-2010, 04:34 PM
 
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Please do yourself a favor and do not bring a bunch of literarture or arguments or try to persuade the doctor. She has a position. You have a position. It's not going to be productive for her to attempt to reason you out of yours, so why would you try this on her?

Simply state your position and leave it at that. If she is willing to have you as a patient, you shouldn't get lectures at this or subsequent visits.
I do agree with this. I don't know that there's much of a point in trying to debate this. I think it's easier to find someone who either agrees with your position in the first place or is okay with agreeing to respectfully disagree - without any lectures!

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#8 of 14 Old 10-11-2010, 03:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by zinemama View Post
Please do yourself a favor and do not bring a bunch of literarture or arguments or try to persuade the doctor. She has a position. You have a position. It's not going to be productive for her to attempt to reason you out of yours, so why would you try this on her?

Simply state your position and leave it at that. If she is willing to have you as a patient, you shouldn't get lectures at this or subsequent visits.
LOL...sorry if I wasn't clear, I have no plans to do that. I was just posting my "wishful thinking" about the visit.

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." ~Mark Twain

 


 
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#9 of 14 Old 10-11-2010, 10:12 PM
 
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I did exactly this today actually. We were dismissed from our other pedi, so off to find a new one. Through the grapevine I hear this ped's office doesn't give parents a hard time about vaxing decision.

I met with a doctor for a consult. They didn't charge me a copay for that. We ended up talking for about an hour, and I asked her a TON of questions based on the research I have done. Here's what happened.

I could tell she didn't know alot of what I had researched and discovered, but she wasn't letting on that I knew more than her no matter what I said.

She just kept saying that there are no studies proving anything that links vaccines to dangerous side effects and that vaccines are safe and effective.

She also repeated more than once that the risks of not getting vaccinated outweigh the risks of the vaccines themselves.

So yeah, it was kind of a robotic conversation. But she will be thinking about our conversation tonight....hopefully she will take on the responsibility that is truly her's to do some real research herself.

How did your appointment go?

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#10 of 14 Old 10-15-2010, 12:15 AM
 
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If you really insist on doing the whole WBV thing I'd just tell the Dr that you have a religious objection/exemption and if she asks what religion you are just tell her I'd rather not discuss my religion or something to that effect.
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#11 of 14 Old 10-20-2010, 10:30 PM
 
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^^
yeah that

I have never brought it up before a visit and we have moved and switched providers a lot over the past few years. I just go and when it comes up, I say we have a religious exemption and drop the conversation. So far, no problems

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#12 of 14 Old 10-21-2010, 12:56 AM
 
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We don't do WBVs either (or at least we haven't since the 2mo visit, and the doctor told me my baby would DIE!!! if I didn't vax her for Hib and I was still very postpartum and started to cry - but still didn't vax) so this hasn't come up with us either. But, after that disasterous 2mo visit I have all of the lines I will ever in my head.

"We choose not to vaccinate."
"No, I don't have any questions."
"I will discuss that with my husband."

Change up and repeat as required. Don't engage, there is really no point. I make it a rule not to discuss vaccines with people who are not at all interested in hearing my opinions, and that definitely includes HCPs.

Wife to DH (06/10) and Mummy to DD (07/08).

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#13 of 14 Old 10-23-2010, 11:05 PM
 
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Originally Posted by just_lily View Post
We don't do WBVs either (or at least we haven't since the 2mo visit, and the doctor told me my baby would DIE!!! if I didn't vax her for Hib and I was still very postpartum and started to cry - but still didn't vax) so this hasn't come up with us either. But, after that disasterous 2mo visit I have all of the lines I will ever in my head.

"We choose not to vaccinate."
"No, I don't have any questions."
"I will discuss that with my husband."

Change up and repeat as required. Don't engage, there is really no point. I make it a rule not to discuss vaccines with people who are not at all interested in hearing my opinions, and that definitely includes HCPs.
Ditto this. My line is "nope, we're good."

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#14 of 14 Old 10-25-2010, 04:10 AM
 
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I don't go to a pediatrician unless I know ahead of time that she/he is critical of vaccines. If you go to a pediatrician who is pro-vax, you risk focusing on vaccines and neglecting the real reasons that you are there.

Roman Goddess, mom to J (August 2004) and J (April 2009).    h20homebirth.gif signcirc1.gif
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