Has anyone ever regret their decision to NOT vax? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 65 Old 12-19-2010, 05:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm just curious about this. I am ready to jump on board to not continue vaxing dd, dh however is not comfortable. DD was vaxed according to Dr. Sears alternative schedule up to 7 mths and then we "took a break". She is now 15 mths and I am not looking to do anymore or to have any future kids vaxed at all. I just need to convince DH!

Has anyone regretted their decision to stop vaxing or even to not vax at all from the begnning? If so, what happened to make you regret that decision?

SAHM to my #1 little miss (9/11/09) and have been TTC since 06/10 (with 1 loss 3/12/11).We do all the usual "crunchy" things!I'm typing from my iPhone so please excuse any errors.
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#2 of 65 Old 12-19-2010, 05:52 PM
 
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Not here. DS is 20mo and we feel as glad today that we haven't vaxed that we were when we decided not to, before he was even born. We have another baby coming next spring too and will do the same.


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#3 of 65 Old 12-19-2010, 06:00 PM
 
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We have not regretted our decision. The thing about not vaxing is that you can always start vaxing again. But you can't take vaxes back.

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#4 of 65 Old 12-19-2010, 06:29 PM
 
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DD is 2.5 and DS is 12 months. Both have been in daycare since 6 weeks old. I don't regret our decision not to vax them.

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#5 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 11:21 AM
 
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DS is 2.5 never been vaxed. I not only don't regret it, but my DS have allergies and others issues and I KNOW had we vaxed him he would have been much worse off than he is now.

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#6 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 11:39 AM
 
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I don't regret it, but I get super nervous when DS runs a fever. It haunts me. But I am an anxious type of person. DS rarely ever gets sick... But we actually will try to go ahead with one shot this Friday, as I cannot take the worry anymore when he gets sick. I literally run amock with my immagination that he has the worst case of HiB possible or something like that. We will however see how that works out, I'm nervous about it, but DS is nearly 2.5 years old so he can tell me reactions and if there is a bad one, we won't pursuit a selective schedule (we just have DTaP, measles and maybe one HiB on the list, I have access to a measles only shot).I think if I wasn't as nervous, I'd forgo them completely. 

 

 

 

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#7 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 11:56 AM
 
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Originally Posted by goinggreengirl View Post

We have not regretted our decision. The thing about not vaxing is that you can always start vaxing again. But you can't take vaxes back.



That's true, but to be fair, if you find you regret not vaccinating, it's probably a scenario you can't take back either. You might change your mind and go get the vaccinations done, but that's not regret. If you regret not doing it, that implies that a problem happened for which you at least wonder if a vaccine could have alleviated.

 

But I don't regret it and have not been nervous about it either.

 

For me, I couldn't get around looking at each individually. There is no single reason why I don't want to vaccinate. Some vaccines are for childhood illnesses that I think we are better off just having. Some are for diseases that I would never want DD to have but are so rare that I think the risk of vaccinating outweigh the small chance of contracting. Some are for diseases for which the worrisome complications don't really apply to DD (like mumps or rubella). Etc. It's true that I generally distrust the concept of injecting chemicals and foreign DNA into my child's body, so that is a general position I apply to each vaccine. But it's possible that there might be a vaccine some day for which the incident of complications seems really low, plus it's for a condition that worries me and is very widespread. It's possible. But so far, that just hasn't been the case for me.

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#8 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 02:32 PM
 
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I think to be completely comfortable with the decision to not vaccinate and not regret non-vaccination, you need to accept the failed "science" behind many of the vaccinations. You don't have to dig too deep, especially on a thread like this, to discover it. Once you become comfortable understanding the science, you become comfortable with the decision. You have to look pretty hard to find a child who has died from a "vaccine-preventable" (I put in quotes because I don't believe there is such) disease that was not vaccinated "against" it. Many of the cases of whooping cough, measles and chicken pox seen lately have been in vaccinated children, and few if any have died or had long-lasting effects.

 

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#9 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 02:44 PM
 
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Originally Posted by becca_howell View Post

I think to be completely comfortable with the decision to not vaccinate and not regret non-vaccination, you need to accept the failed "science" behind many of the vaccinations. You don't have to dig too deep, especially on a thread like this, to discover it. Once you become comfortable understanding the science, you become comfortable with the decision. You have to look pretty hard to find a child who has died from a "vaccine-preventable" (I put in quotes because I don't believe there is such) disease that was not vaccinated "against" it. Many of the cases of whooping cough, measles and chicken pox seen lately have been in vaccinated children, and few if any have died or had long-lasting effects.

 

I apologize for not having "cited" any of my info here. I just replaced my laptop and have none of my previous research.

 

I disagree that there is any necessity to go the route of scare-quoting "science" and denying the existence of VPDs--in essence, pretending that there is no risk-benefit calculation--in order to comfortably arrive at a decision not to vaccinate.

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#10 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 02:49 PM
 
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I will admit I felt slightly unsure when I had the vax lecture in Pharmacology class.  It was more the animosity towards non-vaxers (the teacher said in lecture that she believes non-vaxing is child abuse) that angered me and made me realize the crap non-vaxers face from medical professionals.  I have never had an issue but none of my children have ever been hospitalized; I can't imagine having to deal with the opinions of others while in that situation.

 

Anyway, I have yet to hear a convincing argument for vaccinating, so no I don't regret it.  Our ex-pediatrician was very against nonvaxing, and especially pushed for the Tdap because she had 'personally seen over 200 cases of pertussis hospitalized in the past year'.  I asked how many of those were vaccinated children and she admitted that all but 5 had been vaccinated.  I told her we would take our chances (and at this point my DD was already over a year old, so I wasn't really concerned about it anyway).


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#11 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 06:11 PM
 
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I admit that I occasionally have a "freak-out" moment.  When I compare the infant and toddler (now early childhood) health of my own vaccinated children vs. my non-vaccinated children as well as that of their vaccinated vs. not vaccinated peers, I am very re-assured that we're making the right decision.  My non-vaccinated children occasionally have a runny nose and fever.  My vaccinated children and their vaccinated peers have histories of several ear infections, lots of viruses and colds, stomache flus, etc.  Luckily all my kids are neurotypical, but when I compare friends' children..those who vaccinate vs. those who don't...I see a huge difference in mental/neurological issues and learning disorders, ADD, non-verbal learning disorders, etc.  So, the occasional "what if they get whooping cough?" is balanced out by seeing the damage in my own and in other people's children that I believe was caused by vaccines.  It took years for my older children to get their immune systems back after their vaccines. 

 

Two vaccinated and 2 not...huge differences in the health of them.  With the oldest ones, I could count the days  after exposure to any public children's play equipment, trip the dr., Mcdonald's playland or grocery shopping trip and predict an illness.  Every Single Time!  I was housebound for months one year with my kids being sick..taking turns with stomache bugs, ear infections and colds..  Now, the youngest two can be taken anywhere.  I never worry about them catching anything...they just don't.  I was a huge germaphobe with my first two due to our frequent illnesses...not now.  We go anywhere we want whenever we want and I don't have to count down the days to when they'll get sick.  When they do get sick, it's like a fever for a day and then gone.  Even the swine flu last year had me down hard for two weeks.  My kids had a fever and were tired for 2 days and then fine.

 

I know you wanted regrets...sorry there are none here.


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#12 of 65 Old 12-20-2010, 06:27 PM
 
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no regrets and my kid is an adult now.

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#13 of 65 Old 12-21-2010, 02:22 PM
 
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None yet, and zero vaxes here.

 

Over the summer we thought DD had chicken pox (turned out it was Hand Foot and Mouth) and I got a lot of "I bet you wished you vaxed her now!" comments.  But we didn't regret it, and wouldn't have regretted it even if it was CP.  Twenty years ago getting CP as a toddler was normal, and a relief for 'getting it over with'.  Now it is reason to panic??


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#14 of 65 Old 12-23-2010, 06:22 AM
 
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no regrets here.  my three are all in school (8, 6.5 and 4), have never had a vaccine and I'm very comfortable with the decision.  They are sick far less often and with far less severity than any of their peers.  We've even been complimented by the school nurses.  we did have mumps and pertussis a few years apart.  they did fine with the support that we used and it was in no way, shape or form dramatic.

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#15 of 65 Old 12-23-2010, 07:52 AM
 
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No vaxes, no regrets. My kids are 3yo and 5 months. Both are out in the world and around other kids all the time.

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#16 of 65 Old 12-23-2010, 07:04 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post

I will admit I felt slightly unsure when I had the vax lecture in Pharmacology class.  It was more the animosity towards non-vaxers (the teacher said in lecture that she believes non-vaxing is child abuse) that angered me and made me realize the crap non-vaxers face from medical professionals.  I have never had an issue but none of my children have ever been hospitalized; I can't imagine having to deal with the opinions of others while in that situation.

 

 


This is funny, but not, as I am currently taking a mini-brake from the hospital where my 22 month old has been for the last day and a half. He started a fever 102.5 at 1:00 and had a seizure at 5:30 so I took him in as it was his first seizure and I was surprised that it happened. Both e-room doctors where complete UAV's when they found out he wasn't vaccinated. The first kept insisting that "he could have absolutely anything" since I failed to vaccinate. 

 

Top off the fact that he is intact and I insisted that I be the one to hold his penis when they took a urine sample as they screamed for over an hour about the need for a "clean catch" required complete retraction of the penis and by that time his initial blood work had come back and he still hadn't woken up so I knew he was indeed very sick. I am not their favorite parent :-)

 

But you know what, if this is indeed HIB related I still don't think I will regret not getting the shot. Of course if he dies or is seriously injured I will blame myself b/c I am a mom. I made an informed decision and weighed the risks and sought the appropriate care promptly when he showed signs of being very sick. 

 

I guess my point is that if your child does come down with something serious, be prepared as you will get lectured/talked down to/glared at b/c many doc.s really don't see a problem with shots and will really think you are stupid/lazy/or just neglectful. Even if you are being treated like **** you still are the parent and still get to decide what treatments and tests to allow.

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#17 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 04:28 PM
 
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:hug  I hope he gets better soon.  I'm sorry you're having a rough time.

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Quote:
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I will admit I felt slightly unsure when I had the vax lecture in Pharmacology class.  It was more the animosity towards non-vaxers (the teacher said in lecture that she believes non-vaxing is child abuse) that angered me and made me realize the crap non-vaxers face from medical professionals.  I have never had an issue but none of my children have ever been hospitalized; I can't imagine having to deal with the opinions of others while in that situation.

 

 


This is funny, but not, as I am currently taking a mini-brake from the hospital where my 22 month old has been for the last day and a half. He started a fever 102.5 at 1:00 and had a seizure at 5:30 so I took him in as it was his first seizure and I was surprised that it happened. Both e-room doctors where complete UAV's when they found out he wasn't vaccinated. The first kept insisting that "he could have absolutely anything" since I failed to vaccinate. 

 

Top off the fact that he is intact and I insisted that I be the one to hold his penis when they took a urine sample as they screamed for over an hour about the need for a "clean catch" required complete retraction of the penis and by that time his initial blood work had come back and he still hadn't woken up so I knew he was indeed very sick. I am not their favorite parent :-)

 

But you know what, if this is indeed HIB related I still don't think I will regret not getting the shot. Of course if he dies or is seriously injured I will blame myself b/c I am a mom. I made an informed decision and weighed the risks and sought the appropriate care promptly when he showed signs of being very sick. 

 

I guess my point is that if your child does come down with something serious, be prepared as you will get lectured/talked down to/glared at b/c many doc.s really don't see a problem with shots and will really think you are stupid/lazy/or just neglectful. Even if you are being treated like **** you still are the parent and still get to decide what treatments and tests to allow.




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#18 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 06:24 PM
 
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Sarafi ((hugs))

 

as someone who has totally annoyed hospital staff before because I won't just blindly follow their orders, insist on reading the chart and actually seeing the physical copy of tests results and have had to fire a hospital assigned Dr due to him threatening me, I totally hear you. Many of them do not know how to deal with people who don't just bow down to their authority as if they were God. Good for you for standing up for an protecting your son.

 

Not sure of your spiritual beliefs but I don't you won't be offended if I add your family to my prayers.

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#19 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 06:56 PM
 
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#20 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 08:28 PM
 
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Quote:
Has anyone regretted their decision to stop vaxing or even to not vax at all from the beginning? If so, what happened to make you regret that decision?


Nope. Not in the least.

 

I did regret the one and only vax my oldest got, though. Luckily her reaction didn't cause permanent damage.

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#21 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 08:45 PM
 
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Nope - no regret here.  And i had to FIGHT.  DD was in the nicu at birth with brain damage and oh boy you would have thought that vax would cure brain damage from how they shrieked at me.  Luckily the ped neurologist backed me up and said no way should she have any vax until she was much older and possibly never.

 

anyhow, dd is 6 and has had CP and measles.  Both times she was itchy and had a rash and that was it.  She has had swine flu and was exposed to pertussis and had a cough for a few days.

 

None of my kids 6, 2, and 5 months is vaxed at all and i do not regret it.

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#22 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 09:04 PM
 
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Granted Shane is a mere five months, but I have absolutely no regrets. In fact, I am greatful that my cousin opened my eyes to the truth about vaccines. Shane has never been sick a day in his short little life yet, and he gets around.

Now if Shane were to contract and die from one of the dieases that he could have been vaccinated for, then I might have regrets. Or I just might remeber all the research I've done and all the doctors that are AGAINST vaccines and come to realize that the contuination of life is never guarented.

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#23 of 65 Old 12-24-2010, 11:48 PM
 
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Thanks for your thoughts and prayers ladies!

 

My baby is home, all his tests came back negative and he was checked out on our Christmas day. So other than the fact that he did have some kind of infection he is in the clear So glad. He is still crabby and has a wicked case of diarrhea but over all he is well.

 

It's very strange as we have a strong family history of appendicitis and both the ped.'s blew me off every time I asked them to check (we also have a history of presenting "wrong" and two of my sisters almost died when theirs burst). I am going to be watching him very closely until then, but since she refused to call anyone in over Christmas to "make me feel better" home is probably a better place to wait. I do hope I am wrong and he is in fact better.

 

We go back in for a check up in two days and I insisted that she ultrasound his stomach to check, I really think the whole "non-vaxing" thing made this visit MUCH harder than it needed to be, but I am still in the no-regrets camp.

 

Sorry to hi-jack, just wanted to update

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#24 of 65 Old 12-25-2010, 04:45 AM
 
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Sarafi glad your LO is home.Speedy healings and shame on doctors for not fully checking.They never like it when the patient/parent makes a suggestion.

 

No regrets at this time for not vaccinating.My kiddos are now 8 and 11. Got a lot of flack for not giving dd the HepB at birth.Little did they know the hepB vaccine injured me as an adult,so screaming at me that dd would die without it did little other than push me to question ALL vaccines.

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#25 of 65 Old 12-25-2010, 05:15 AM
 
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well I can tell you I completely regret vaxing. I had an un-medicated birth to a beautiful healthy baby...when she was 2 m/o she got her first vax ( i didnt want to but cracked under pressure i was 21 and the Dr treated me like an idiot) she got sick right away...i vaxed her until she was 9 m/o and she was sick from the time she was 2 m/o until 9 m/o no lie. everything under the sun virus after virus, blood in her stool, stomach problems, intolerances, roseola, some real scary virus too that ended us up in the hospital...in between being "better" it was always a cold which lead to sinus infections ect ect

 

I finally put my foot down at 10 m/o when my BFing SAH child was sick yet again and the Dr said oh i think we should give her her flu shots today and maybe give her next vax a little early b/c she gets sick so much. I practically ran out of there.

 

I have never vaxed her since and she is 15 m/o. so she had not had a vax since 9 m/o so in 6 months she has had 2 colds and 1 virus. 

you can not imagine my relief. all the worry I endured all the freaking out of WHY WHY WHY is my child so sick. my FF friends baby in daycare is waaaaaaaaaay less sick than DD (but still pretty sick), then one day it clicked it was her body's reaction to the vax. I just knew if I stopped vaxing her she would get better.

 

As of 2 months after her last vax she gut healed and there was NO MORE BLOOD in her stool for the first time since she was 2 m/o she was no longer in pain. she used to scream in her sleep it hurt so badly. she went to countless Drs and I on countless diets. Then one day I *felt* she was better and took some stool to the Dr NO BLOOD her first stool ever tested that had no blood in it.

I started slowly adding things back to my diet.....no reactions at all with anything!

 

I regret cracking under pressure completely, I feel like I failed her injecting her with that poison. Every single time my instincts told me NO DON'T DO IT..but the Drs kept pushing and pushing and I was afraid.

 

we were just at the hospital the other day (b/c the one virus she had is the one she has right now, and she got it from me) her pedi sent us there (apparetly b/c she wasnt vaxed so she was scared but I didn't know that was why...) and the nurse says is she up to date on her vaccines? I said no I stopped at 9 m/o. she says and why is that? just because?

OOOH I was pissed I said no I have done extensive research and feel it is in my daughter's best interest.

she didnt say anything..

 

anyways good luck I hope you win hubby over. I just told mine, my instincts were going off and I'm not vaxing again. He trusts me enough to know I wouldn't endanger her.


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#26 of 65 Old 12-27-2010, 07:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow, I haven't made it back on here in awhile, I am so happy to see so many replies! And no one regretting their decision yet:). Thanks for all the personal stories too!

SAHM to my #1 little miss (9/11/09) and have been TTC since 06/10 (with 1 loss 3/12/11).We do all the usual "crunchy" things!I'm typing from my iPhone so please excuse any errors.
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#27 of 65 Old 12-27-2010, 07:29 PM
 
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No, I regret vaxxing my older kids. I have anxious moments now and then worrying my youngest will get something preventable by a vaccine, but I'm an anxious person.

 

The scare tactics actually make me feel more comfortable with my decision. Recently I was interviewing peds. I told the doc I was not vaccinating, and she launched into a lecture about all the migrant workers' children from Mexico who died from measles when she did her internship 20 years earlier on the West Coast.

 

So, I said, were these children in good health to begin with? Were they properly nourished? Did they have comfortable homes? Low stress? Access to regular health care?

 

I'm thinking the children she saw who died from measles 20 years ago were impoverished, malnourished, stressed and in generally poor health. She didn't know the answers to my questions, but LOVED telling a parent about how omitting a vaccine can lead to DEATH of a child. Please. I found another ped.

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#28 of 65 Old 12-27-2010, 08:45 PM
 
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Hmm, i don't know if this is any value or not, but my close friend doesn't do any vax (and doesn't BF past a few weeks because her milk 'dries up') and her DD, 5, caught rotavirus a few years ago and was almost hospitalized for dehydration. She says the toll that it took on her daughter felt like torture (the vomitting and diahhea lasted over a week) and the nights of worry it caused her and her DH were not worth it. She says she wishes she just would have gotten the vaccine since it is oral and not as dangerous as the injectibles. Of course I strongly feel the not breastfeeding part was a HUGE factor.

 

Not me personally, but maybe what you're looking for? 


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I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#29 of 65 Old 12-27-2010, 08:46 PM
 
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Well, I am an adult who has never regretted my parent's NO vax decision, does that count? And, I know they and my 4 non-vax'd siblings agree with me on that. And, in childhood, I had mumps, and we all had pertussis. With the mumps, my mom took me to the Dr to confirm her Dx, refused their Rx, took me home and treated it from her natural healing books, I was sick for less than a week I'm pretty sure. Pertussis she didn't take any of us to the Dr, no hospitalizations required, lasted a couple of weeks. Was it fun? No. Was it traumatizing or life-threatening? No. I know when we were all sick w/ pertussis, that my dad questioned the decision a little bit, but, in the moment, when a child is sick, of course a parent is going to question whether there was *anything* they could have done differently to prevent their child's discomfort.

 

Also, when I was 6 mos pregnant with my DD there was a pertussis exposure/outbreak at work, and some of my (vax'd) co-workers got it. The assistant director was freaking out about me being exposed, b/c of the pregnancy, so I asked my midwife, and she said that since I had actually had the disease as a child I probably had better immunity than anyone else in the building. Sure enough, I was completely fine. (And, pertussis while 6 mos pg (even if it hadn't done any damage) would have been way more miserable than it was when I was 10).

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#30 of 65 Old 12-28-2010, 04:04 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShwarmaQueen View Post

Hmm, i don't know if this is any value or not, but my close friend doesn't do any vax (and doesn't BF past a few weeks because her milk 'dries up') and her DD, 5, caught rotavirus a few years ago and was almost hospitalized for dehydration. She says the toll that it took on her daughter felt like torture (the vomitting and diahhea lasted over a week) and the nights of worry it caused her and her DH were not worth it. She says she wishes she just would have gotten the vaccine since it is oral and not as dangerous as the injectibles. Of course I strongly feel the not breastfeeding part was a HUGE factor.

 

Not me personally, but maybe what you're looking for? 


given your sig, as I'm sure you know babies that have PTT often have mothers who experience milk drying up at a few weeks (usually before 3 months) unless the mother has a robust supply.  Without proper diagnosis (there was very little criteria 5 plus years ago for the general populace) there's often not much you can do.

 

while lack of breastfeeding can be problematic in terms of developing the immune system, there are, I believe, many ways to circumvent that and bolster the immune system.  just saying that doesn't need to be a factor.  My oldest was not able to be breastfed.  though he received pumped milk he was largely formula fed.  He has an incredibly robust immune system-arguably the best of my three.  The others were ebf.

 

Of course breastfeeding lays an excellent foundation, but it's not the only path to health.  I wouldn't chose to vaccinate simply because a child wasn't, for whatever reason, breastfed.

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