nonvax'er....how do u handle playdates? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 03:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello! Thank goodness for this thread! smile.gif

I'm not shy to proclaim I'm a nonvaxer with my dd. She hasn't had a playdate as of yet but how do u handle it. I'm wondering about etiquette. Do I let folks know that my dd is unvaxxed? Onis it no ones business?? I'm also nervous the first playdate will be the first time she contracts a cold which is probably just my anxiety. She's 6.5 months hasn't had any kind if sickness yet.
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#2 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 03:30 PM
 
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Don't worry about a cold. It's gonna happen and it's no big deal. It's good for her to develop her immune system!

I don't tell people my son's vac status unless they ask. But I live in a town where many children are unvaxxed so it's not a big deal. Honestly, though, I wouldn't worry about it.

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#3 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 03:30 PM
 
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Children get sick vax & nonvax. So I would not think about playdates in terms of health.

 

I would not bring it up. I would find people that you want to hang with and go from there. I don't go to someone and say "Hi, can we have a playdate? OH I don't vax ____."

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#4 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 03:51 PM
 
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Our non-vax daughter has at least had the sniffles more times than I can count between the garderie, public playgrounds, etc.

 

She's so healthy, though, nothing usually last more than 24 hours.  I used to get upset about it at first, but I've gotten used to it, and really pretty much expect it.  I don't mind because it's building her immune system the healthy way... Like eating mud pies.  :)

 

I usually tell people we don't vaccinate after they comment on how strong and bright she is, and how she focuses on tasks so well.  It's a lot easier to mention after they are telling you how amazing your child is.  Doing it in this order, I've never had anybody say a word to me about non-vax being evil.

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#5 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 03:52 PM
 
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I don't really do playdates, but am pretty much of the opinion that it is none of their business.

 

If my kid is sick we stay home. We would do that even if we vaxxed.

 

If a mother I knew put up a big stink about not wanting non-vaxx kids in her house, I would probably respect her wishes and not bother going.

 

I do have half a mind next time I hear someone on fb complaining about non-vaxx kids putting their kids at risk, of asking if they haven't brought up their concerns that their child's vaxxes didn't actually confir immunity with their doctor to see what can be done. wink1.gif

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#6 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 04:31 PM
 
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No, you don't have to tell people that you don't vax.  That would be like asking if they wanted your child's blood type or SSN.  It's completely irrelevant.

 

Also, your LO is going to get lots of colds.  That's good, it will make her strong.  Just offer system support, don't worry too much about meds to stop a fever or antibx.  Let her body do its thing and she will be just fine.

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#7 of 8 Old 07-16-2013, 04:47 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fruitfulmomma View Post

I don't really do playdates, but am pretty much of the opinion that it is none of their business.

 

If my kid is sick we stay home. We would do that even if we vaxxed.

 

If a mother I knew put up a big stink about not wanting non-vaxx kids in her house, I would probably respect her wishes and not bother going.

I agree with the above.  It's nobody's business what medical treatments your kids have received. 

 

Also agree that if someone DID make a big deal about it we probably wouldn't go to her house- but perhaps more because if they'd exclude people from their presence for not taking the right drugs, they probably aren't the kind of friends I want for me or my kids.


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#8 of 8 Old 08-06-2013, 08:19 PM
 
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I don't shelter my child. I want her to have as many rich life experiences and opportunities that are available....that includes play dates and involvement in playgroups. Since DD was 8 months she's attended weekly Gymboree classes and attended many birthday parties with vax'ed and non-vax'ed children. We also take her to the childrens museum often. She's extremely healthy and has only been sick once. When we leave I always make sure to wash her hands and we give vitaminD every night.... Just good hygiene
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