Ever get accused of being a crazy hippie? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 34 Old 03-15-2008, 10:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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The other day we got told by assorted family members that our child is going to die because she is not vaccinated. Also that we were not interested in "real science" and just ignorant ideals. We were told we were negligent parents and irresponsible towards the welfare of our daughter.

It's the worst thing that any group of people could ever have said to me, but you know what? I'm glad it happened, because now I know how I would react.

I'm still not vaccinating.

and if this makes me a crazy hippie, then so be it :
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#2 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 05:53 AM
 
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Only all the time by my mom. Strangely enough, she sees how healthy my children are and she respects my decision even if she doesn't quite understand or agree with it, but she does admit there is *something* about my children that seems like their immune systems are stronger, not weaker, due to not vaxing. She's an RN and has been for longer than I've been alive so vaxing is deeply ingrained in her brain. I've been lucky enough to have had nothing but respectful discussions with her about it though, thankfully. I think maybe if more people knew about vax status I might hear about it more often but it's a thing I tend to keep private.
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#3 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 09:14 AM
 
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My Dad was furious, and resorted to the old "wait until you are trapped in the car to bring it up" technique. I started pointing out side effects and he shut up. It was nice. I also pointed out "my doctor doesn't have a problem with it, why do you?"

I wasn't planning on him knowing, but my DF brought it up when I wasn't there.

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#4 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 11:32 AM
 
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People have stopped asking about our life choices and style. Everything under the sun drives my parents crazy and we just learn to not bring those up anymore. IL's are fine. They don't really ask either and my friends, they either are in the same boat as me or don't know what it means to have your own family
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#5 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 02:31 PM
 
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Nah, 'cause most people who know me, know I am....



hahhaa

Not really, I'm not HALF as crunchy as some of the moms on here..in fact, I'm almost sog in comparison!

(The only really crunchy things about me are co-sleeping, homebirthing, extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxxing, baby wearing, gentle discipline)

I'm not really that green (own a minivan, hello! and we totally use soft scrub) don't go out of my way to eat organic, not a good cook so yah, we order out a bit, etc.

I'm just "crunchy" enough to be mildly annoying/entertaining to mainstream people...
and just "not crunchy" enough to be "sog" to the truly granola.

*sigh*

I'm an enigma.
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#6 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 03:20 PM
 
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i don't offer up a lot of info about our parenting decisions unless asked specifically. friends who know have been completely surprised by our decision not to vax. both in positive and borderline negative ways. we have a mix of non crunchy and crunchy friends. the negative reactions i dismiss completely and move on to another topic. you asked, i was honest. you don't like, too bad. my child, my choice. i don't ever engage in arguments over it. just state my opinion and move on.

we practice some other NFL/AP things like co-sleeping, bfing, non circing, no cio, eating whole mostly organic unprocessed foods...
but my dh and i don't look "crunchy". we just don't have a crazy hippie vibe AT ALL... i don't think we've been called "crazy hippies", ever! we just don't have a freak flag to fly.

like the pp our family is an enigma - and i like it that way. i like that it makes people question their own thought processes. i've seen this flicker across a couple faces of - "wow they seem normal but they don't vax, hmmmm...what's that about?" and then a few minutes later it's more discussion than arguments or accusations.

i know other families IRL who come across "crazy hippie" but circ without question, vax on schedule, formula feed and use corporal punishment. it just proves you can't judge a book by it's cover.
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#7 of 34 Old 03-16-2008, 06:03 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilu'okalani View Post
It's the worst thing that any group of people could ever have said to me, but you know what? I'm glad it happened, because now I know how I would react.
How did you respond?


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I'm still not vaccinating.

and if this makes me a crazy hippie, then so be it :
Good for you to stand your ground and to the vaccine forum.

Don't worry about what other people say or think. Do your own thing.
Those who want "real science" send them this site -

http://insidevaccines.com/wordpress/?p=16

Now there is "real science".

We don't have much of a problem because my three kids are grown ups and married and we all basically live the same way. Green, organic, vegetarian, modest, somewhat self sufficient, enlightened.

Unfortunately the in laws of my daughter have a problem with the grandkids not being vaccinated. But there is not much they can do because it is not going to happen. They are super healthy kids, but that is not evidence enough for them that the kids don't need "their" vaccines. Go figure...

When I see them (they are great people btw) we don't discuss it.
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#8 of 34 Old 03-17-2008, 09:15 AM
 
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I think most people already think I'm hippyish (definitely different anyway ) but I don't talk about my family's vax decision with most people. The only ones in my circle who know also don't vax (well I did slip and say something around one mom but she didn't say much about it).
If someone asked me I'd tell them though but I have no desire to start that conversation with most people kwim.

OP how did you handle it?

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#9 of 34 Old 03-17-2008, 03:47 PM
 
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Originally Posted by attachedmamaof3 View Post

Not really, I'm not HALF as crunchy as some of the moms on here..in fact, I'm almost sog in comparison!

(The only really crunchy things about me are co-sleeping, homebirthing, extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxxing, baby wearing, gentle discipline)
lol I would say that is pretty darn crunchy to the mainstream world. Most people see ALL those things are crazy.

I have not been called a hippie because my family knows I am pretty hippie to begin with but to be honest…I’m not sure they know that we aren’t vaxing. My mom thinks we are delaying because we are “scared” but will get all the shots for school. I am just leaving it at that. My sister has a 3 month old and we haven’t had the “so how did his shots go?” talk yet and I hope it doesn’t come up. My in laws think we are delaying too but will get them at 6 months……OOPS we are past 6 months and still not vaxing

:
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#10 of 34 Old 03-17-2008, 08:59 PM
 
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We don't really discuss it with people. My parents are definitely "concerned" that DD isn't vax'd and that DS hasn't received all of his, but they don't bring it up or harp on us about it. My IL's didn't even know that you choose not to vax, but they were very interested in what we had to say. I love them but they make me laugh, the eat organics, believe in homeopathy, exercise weekly, but also take about a billion prescription drugs. They are pretty open minded and awesome though.
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#11 of 34 Old 03-17-2008, 10:24 PM
 
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Originally Posted by attachedmamaof3 View Post
Nah, 'cause most people who know me, know I am....



hahhaa

Not really, I'm not HALF as crunchy as some of the moms on here..in fact, I'm almost sog in comparison!

(The only really crunchy things about me are co-sleeping, homebirthing, extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxxing, baby wearing, gentle discipline)

I'm not really that green (own a minivan, hello! and we totally use soft scrub) don't go out of my way to eat organic, not a good cook so yah, we order out a bit, etc.

I'm just "crunchy" enough to be mildly annoying/entertaining to mainstream people...
and just "not crunchy" enough to be "sog" to the truly granola.

*sigh*

I'm an enigma.
Me too! You're not alone Just bought a minivan so now we can't afford the organic food. Ha ha, mostly kidding.
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#12 of 34 Old 03-18-2008, 02:59 AM
 
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Originally Posted by attachedmamaof3 View Post
Nah, 'cause most people who know me, know I am....



hahhaa

Not really, I'm not HALF as crunchy as some of the moms on here..in fact, I'm almost sog in comparison!

(The only really crunchy things about me are co-sleeping, homebirthing, extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxxing, baby wearing, gentle discipline)

I'm not really that green (own a minivan, hello! and we totally use soft scrub) don't go out of my way to eat organic, not a good cook so yah, we order out a bit, etc.

I'm just "crunchy" enough to be mildly annoying/entertaining to mainstream people...
and just "not crunchy" enough to be "sog" to the truly granola.

*sigh*

I'm an enigma.
Yeah you're way crunchier than I am you're grapenuts and I am oatmeal not quite cooked long enough

Most people don't know we gave up vaxxing except my mom. I think other people just assume we do. I did mention we were 'delaying' to a friend recently when she said he son got chicken pox and the measles from his one year shots, but she didn't say anything back. Honestly the people in my life who would rant at me aren't really in my life much anymore. I am sure it's a lot to do with getting older and more immune to all the plague monkey day care illnesses, but wow he is so much healthier since we stopped with the vaccinations!
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#13 of 34 Old 03-18-2008, 09:48 AM
 
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Most know better. Calling me a hippie is ok, I probably qualify...noone would tell me I am neglectful twice though, I promise.

~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
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#14 of 34 Old 03-18-2008, 02:54 PM
 
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No, just crazy! I do just about everything backwards from my husband's family that I'm pretty much the crazy black sheep. It's okay, I'm happy there.
Quote:
Also that we were not interested in "real science" and just ignorant ideals. We were told we were negligent parents and irresponsible towards the welfare of our daughter.
Well I've been called all of that too. In nicer words of course. I'm so sick of the stupid science thing....science is one thing, scientists and their co-horts are human...therefore they are subject to all the imperfections humans can have...greed, ignorance, etc. Sadly, the "real science" shows a lot of potential damage, it's just people like to stick their fingers in their ears and go "la la la la la" when you try to show them...or when you do, they still want to hide their heads in the sand.
Like rmbzm.....no one calls me ignorant and irresponsible to my face...not anymore. If someone does.....they aren't likely to do it again.

Quote:
The only really crunchy things about me are co-sleeping, homebirthing, extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxxing, baby wearing, gentle discipline)
attachedmamaof3 you sound like a good number of the people here! *hug* You definitely fit in here better than other places!

Actually, except for one friend...no one knows our status. I like it that way. I have no problems sticking it out there but at the same time I realize there's just too much ignorance and not enough genuine wanting to know...I don't bother....unless someone flat-out asks.

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#15 of 34 Old 03-18-2008, 11:54 PM
 
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We're VERY 'crunchy'. Nobody is surprised and we don't get very many comments at all thankfully.

Homebirthing, homeschooling AP, gardening maniac running a working farm. No circ, no vax, no cable TV. EC'd and CD'd, tandem BF'd.  Cheese and soap making goat and child herder.
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#16 of 34 Old 03-19-2008, 12:23 AM
 
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I'm feeeelin' the luuuuv.

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#17 of 34 Old 03-19-2008, 07:21 PM
 
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Extended breastfeeding, non-circing, non-vaxing, former co-sleeping (though my son still co-sleeps with his father), gd'ing mami here.

I'm not crunchy at all, really. Eat bad, watch too much tv, don't recycle, don't eat organic (anymore, used to though...poverty has it's drawbacks). Pretty much solely AP. I still get called a hippie, because I don't do what 'everyone else' does...which is mainly as they are told, no questions asked.

If that's the only other viable option, I'll take being a hippie (and being called one) any day.

OP, congrats on making it through your first anti-vax intolerant conversation. Kudos for your strength and perseverance!
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#18 of 34 Old 03-20-2008, 07:55 AM
 
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I've not been accused of being a hippie, but of Over-Thinking the whole no vaccine scenerio. How can you over-think something so critical? Our childrens lives are in our hands? (not the government. If my child gets sick or has neourlogical damage form his vaccines, who has to live with that? I DO!) its up to us parents to make sure they grow into healthy, productive little human beings? If that is being a "hippie" then I guess I am one.
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#19 of 34 Old 03-20-2008, 02:19 PM
 
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I don't consider myself to be among the SUPER crunchy folk, but like Attached.....we co-sleep, extended bf, AP, babywear, no MORE vaxes, eat organic, limit tv......so to some of my family, we are crazy hippies. They don't know that we aren't vax'ing though, it's non e of their business, and they know better than to bring up my parenting lifestyle..........

: Mama to ds (5) and dd (3) and .
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#20 of 34 Old 03-20-2008, 04:33 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Barbie64g View Post
I've not been accused of being a hippie, but of Over-Thinking the whole no vaccine scenerio. How can you over-think something so critical? Our childrens lives are in our hands? (not the government. If my child gets sick or has neourlogical damage form his vaccines, who has to live with that? I DO!) its up to us parents to make sure they grow into healthy, productive little human beings? If that is being a "hippie" then I guess I am one.
Yeah my husband kept telling me I read too much or I research too much....while he did ZERO research, which therefore meant in certain areas, he gets no say in some aspects of ds's care, like vaxes. Thankfully he's pretty on board with me, but he still is really ignorant in this area and it's scary.

Or I've been told not to believe all the parent's stories out there whose children have been affected by vaxes, autism or not, because these people are just looking for someone to blame. ANd also that there's such a small chance of damage actually happening that the benefit is also worth the risk.

fambedsingle2.gifnovaxnocirc.gifHappy to be a mommy and teacher to D fencing.gif, born 1-17-06 via waterbirth.jpg  and A  blahblah.gif, born 10-6-08 with a homebirth.jpghomeschool.gif

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#21 of 34 Old 03-20-2008, 04:39 PM
 
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I am totally right there with you!
I told my crazy mother in law (wanna be RN) that Camden is not going to be vaccinated and she basically told me I am not only a bad mother, but my son should be taken away?!?!?!
PAUSE! This coming from a woman who abandon 2 of her kids...
Continue...
I explained all the risks and that I will parent MY son the way I see fit no matter what her opinion holds.
My husband and I are probably the most un "hippy" like people you will EVER meet in your lives. But hey... I guess I am a crazy hippy because my sons health is #1 in my book.
I guess I will join you... :
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#22 of 34 Old 03-25-2008, 03:48 AM
 
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Eh...I've gotten the comment of how my children will die without the vaccines and all. But, mainly from my in-laws...who I've politely asked, "How did you ever survive childhood with only the few vaccines that they had back then?"

I'm not crunchy. We do organic foods, little eating out/ordering out, I breastfeed for at least 2 years, homebirth, organic cleaning, co-sleeping, baby wearing, non-vaxing, non-circing...but I don't do cloth diapers. As much as I want to...I just cannot bring myself to do so much laundry. I have enough laundry as it is...which takes all of my willpower to do. LOL *sigh*

It's nice to be around others who are like-minded...or at least who are open-minded enough to just let me make the best choices for my family...without judgement.
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#23 of 34 Old 03-25-2008, 09:18 AM
 
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Yeah my husband kept telling me I read too much or I research too much....while he did ZERO research, which therefore meant in certain areas, he gets no say in some aspects of ds's care, like vaxes. Thankfully he's pretty on board with me, but he still is really ignorant in this area and it's scary.

Or I've been told not to believe all the parent's stories out there whose children have been affected by vaxes, autism or not, because these people are just looking for someone to blame. ANd also that there's such a small chance of damage actually happening that the benefit is also worth the risk.
My husband is in the same boat. He is skeptical, but won't read any of the literature I have put together for him. I have a binder, with the stats, causes, treatment, and cases of damage for EACH vaccine on the "mandatory" list. (I love how they use that word to fear monger) So I told him, if you read the horor stories, and the ingredients of these vaccines and STILL think he should get them, then we will talk some more, but if not, he is just simply not getting them, and that is that." If he wants to leave the responsibility to become educated and informed all up to me, then I guess I make all the desicions too, right?

It also amazes me how many people, (even my best friend who went to college and grad school to become a teacher) think you HAVE to have these vaccines to get into school. Talk about this country being BRAIANWASHED!! KNOW YOUR RIGHTS PEOPLE!!!! Presidential candidate Ron Paul has said, “When we give the power to government to make medical decisions for us, in essence, the state owns our bodies.” And HES A DOCTOR!!!
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#24 of 34 Old 03-31-2008, 10:29 AM
 
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I'd rather be a crazy Hippy than a toxic inducing Yuppy!
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#25 of 34 Old 03-31-2008, 06:43 PM
 
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Yeah, I get called a crazy hippie all the time. And I don't care! I love the earth and I love my babies perfect non toxic body! lol :

Danielle*

Danielle, wife to John, mama to Valley9.24.07
expecting our miracle babies around 5.12.10- praying that baby B grows healthy and strong!
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#26 of 34 Old 04-01-2008, 03:17 PM
 
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On a visit to the IL's (thankfully, several states away), we actually got interrogated about why we aren't vaxing anymore in the middle of dinner at a birthday celebration (not mine )! This, after DS had a bad reaction to his 4 month vaccines and we were in turmoil- and they knew all the details. It was truly unbelievable. I was so blindsided, I could barely think of one intelligent thing to say- not that they would have listened.

We have gotten the, "Well, I hope this won't stop you from giving him the rest of his vaxes" speech by two family friends (doctors). Um, yeh, that's EXACTLY what it's done. Sometimes I feel like I'm living in the Twilight Zone.

And, I think I'm getting crunchier by the day (and what happened to my son definitely helped with that!).

You all rock and I'm so happy I found this place!!!
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#27 of 34 Old 04-03-2008, 01:05 AM
 
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My FIL calls me a hippy dippy. My brothers (who are both way hippier than me) call me too mainstream. You cannot make all the people happy all the time so you have to do what you hope to be right. Way to go for sticking to your decision.
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#28 of 34 Old 04-07-2008, 07:37 PM
 
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Sometimes I feel like I'm living in the Twilight Zone.

Seriously I think we are neighbors!
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#29 of 34 Old 04-08-2008, 07:44 PM
 
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Yes, I have definitely been accused of being a hippie. My husband is finally coming around and is beginning to believe and research the things I tell him. The rest of the family thinks I'm insane. It is funny because I am a big blogger and all of my family except for a few won't even link to my blog from theirs because they're afraid people will think they are "nuts" like me. Even though they have every.single.other. family members blog (except mine) linked on theirs. I think it's humorous. A couple of them are brave but most of them aren't. I am shocked that my parents are supportive, it is my husbands side of the family that thinks I'm nuts. I try to share information with them but I swear they won't even look at it.
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#30 of 34 Old 04-09-2008, 09:40 AM
 
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HAPPY HIPPO: I can relate. ANIELLAS MOMMY: I wish we WERE neighbors!
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