What are your birth plans? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 12:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I thought I start a poll so we could see what everyone is planning! I'll be having my first homebirth and I am BEYOND excited.

What are you ladies planning?


ETA: It's really hard to type with a toddler head between you and the computer screen!

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#2 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 12:50 PM
 
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Just joined up here on a hunch that I'm sure that I'm pregnant (chiro verified with her techniques on my spine, she can just tell and is very good at it!!).

Well if it's really true and I'm here for the long haul, we're planning a home waterbirth with a CPM. I'm very excited since this is our first baby and I've been researching this for so long. I'm happy that I get to do it like this the first time and possibly have an ecstatic experience!

Who else?

Kemi wifedreads.gif to Jeffdh_malesling.GIF mommy to Rohan h20homebirth.gifROTFLMAO.gif 1/3/09 and Narenhomebirth.jpg(transfer to hospital) blahblah.gif  10/22/10. Pregnant with stork-girl.gif

****5****10****15****20****25****30****353rdtri.gif***40 (Hospital BC w/CNMs due to GD)

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#3 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 01:22 PM
 
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Because of prior uterine surgeries (lots of LARGE fibroids), I am at increased risk for rupture, abruption and a couple other complications so things won't ever be exactly as I would wish. I will have to have a C-section for the safety of my self and my child. I have had multiple opinions on this and talked to everyone from private practice midwives to the head of obstetrics at a good university hospital. There is no way around it. I wish there were. However disappointing that is, the birth of my son was still the most beautiful thing I could imagine. THIS TIME I will be more proactive after the birth and make sure to nurse sooner. I hope to go to the same hospital, they give all non-highrisk moms midwives at their first appointment and OBs only when necessary. Rooming in is the norm and they don't give out formula samples. I know it doesn't sound that good to the rest of you, but this is really the best I can ask for and I am comfortable with that.
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#4 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 04:26 PM
 
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Last time we had a traditional hospital birth, with pitocin and no epidural - which I do not recommend! This time I want to try a midwife at a birth center or at home. I'm not sure which. Birthing at home sounds appealing, but I want to find out more about both. I know I definitely want a natural birth that is as laid back as possible, with my family and son there. Last time I had so many wires stuck to me my husband said I looked like an entertainment center. I'd also really like to try a waterbirth.

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#5 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 04:41 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lillifret View Post
I know it doesn't sound that good to the rest of you, but this is really the best I can ask for and I am comfortable with that.
I'm so happy you found something you feel comfortable with and supported by. We all have to make choices from time to time that don't look they way we expected or wanted, but we do our best nonetheless. Congrats!

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#6 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 05:18 PM
 
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It's time to do my homework. I attempted a natural hospital birth and wound up swayed into a c-section because my water had broken and I was on pitocin but not progressing. Boy, I have learned a lot since then. Unfortunately, my options feel really limited...I feel as though I have to either deal with hospital policies that will likely push me toward a repeat c-section or stay home. Neither of these choices makes me very comfortable. So I hope to find a really good caregiver who will help me out...
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#7 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 05:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by namistenicole View Post
I'm so happy you found something you feel comfortable with and supported by. We all have to make choices from time to time that don't look they way we expected or wanted, but we do our best nonetheless. Congrats!

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: I totally agree with Namistenicole. You are in a high risk situation so this calls for OB intervention and c-section. We don't fault you for that. This is a situation where all the bells and whistles are necessary. You can maximize your birth experience by doing hypnosis (hypnobabies has a nice program for that), or reading some positive books about cesarean birth for women in your situation. I had a fibroid before and I personally know how blessed you are to be able to have children in the first place. My fibroid was in the middle of my uterus hanging on a short stalk so there was no cutting into my uterus. I was afraid too, but I understood that if the situation were different and I had to have c-section to have babies because of the fibroids I'd take that because I wanted babies so much. So know that you're in a supportive environment with us. We know this isn't your first choice. We are happy because you get to have your baby and we only hope that you and your LO are healthy and happy....

Kemi wifedreads.gif to Jeffdh_malesling.GIF mommy to Rohan h20homebirth.gifROTFLMAO.gif 1/3/09 and Narenhomebirth.jpg(transfer to hospital) blahblah.gif  10/22/10. Pregnant with stork-girl.gif

****5****10****15****20****25****30****353rdtri.gif***40 (Hospital BC w/CNMs due to GD)

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#8 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 05:58 PM
 
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Originally Posted by erinmacey View Post
It's time to do my homework. I attempted a natural hospital birth and wound up swayed into a c-section because my water had broken and I was on pitocin but not progressing. Boy, I have learned a lot since then. Unfortunately, my options feel really limited...I feel as though I have to either deal with hospital policies that will likely push me toward a repeat c-section or stay home. Neither of these choices makes me very comfortable. So I hope to find a really good caregiver who will help me out...
Have you considered a freestanding birth center? If there is one in your area, and depending on what state you live in, you can have a VBAC there. It's like your home, but you're away from it. Basically a homebirth is like a birth center birth, only you're at home, the exact opposite. They bring all the equipment and stuff to your house for a homebirth. Basically, if you're feeling reluctant going to the hospital and you still aren't comfortable with a homebirth after doing your research, then a freestanding birth center is a good compromise on the two. You can also go to your Tribe for the area you live in and ask them about how VBAC is supported in the area. Your best bet would be to stay away from the hospital though, really. That or hire a doula or midwife to act as a doula for you so that you can have the choice at the last minute whether you want to stay home or head to the birth center or hospital. Just some suggestions on where you can start your research...BTW I'm trained as a doula.

Kemi wifedreads.gif to Jeffdh_malesling.GIF mommy to Rohan h20homebirth.gifROTFLMAO.gif 1/3/09 and Narenhomebirth.jpg(transfer to hospital) blahblah.gif  10/22/10. Pregnant with stork-girl.gif

****5****10****15****20****25****30****353rdtri.gif***40 (Hospital BC w/CNMs due to GD)

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#9 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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I am planning a HBA3C/UBA3C. I will be having a MW in attendance but we have agreed she will be totally hands off unless the need arises for her to step in. I am soo excited! Even though its still early I have already started listing off things I want during labor to my SO. I don't think I did enough of this in my last labor and he had no clue what I wanted or needed. So I figure if I start telling him now he will have it all remembered by the big day lol. I don't know yet if I will do a WB or even get a tub as last time it helped a little bit but not nearly enough and it was such a hassle with giving such little relief.

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#10 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 08:21 PM
 
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Due to reasons I really don't want to discuss here, I'll be having another c-section.

Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker. - Linus
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#11 of 20 Old 03-31-2008, 08:26 PM
 
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Well I've been sitting all day thinking about this after reading some very negative reviews about the 2-midwife group I had chosen to work with, and because I am still very drawn to birthing at home. My partner's response to birthing at home is "I can't deal with that". While I respect that she is half of the equation, and that her fear if it is based in concern for her wife and two children, I also believe that her fear is based in... well, for lack of a better term, ignorance. I know she has not read any research on home birth being safer, and I know that she believes that my and/or our son's life/lives were saved by the fact that he was born surgically, when I believe that if we hadn't been in that setting, he would have been born naturally.

I had chosen this smaller midwife group because I had heard LOTS of good things about them, but now everything I've read today has been negative. Plus I found myself already getting defensive going into my first appointment and it's not for another 3 weeks!!

The first question I have for any midwife who is going to tend to me is "What is your advice to me going to be when December 13 comes and goes and there's no baby? - because I can almost guarantee that's going to be the case!". I carry long. My son was 16 days "late". My prior midwife group let me carry as long as I wanted to as long as the baby was healthy, but it also entailed a drive to their clinic every day for a "non-stress test" (non-stressful for whom?!). If a midwife I'm interviewing says to me that, given my history of c-section, they will want to induce out of fear of uterine rupture, I will be standing up, putting on my coat and leaving.

And I'm really afraid of doing that, but I believe it's what I have to do.

Uuuuuuuuuugh...!

Long story short, Erin, we are in the same shoes.

lillifret, ICAN has resources on creating a peaceful, family-oriented cesarean birth, and I saw a video advertised here once too, although I wouldn't be surprised if it was culled from the google ads since it was pro-cesarean. If you have a local ICAN chapter, I bet that you would be able to meet someone who's been in similar shoes, whether because of fibroids or placenta previa, etc.

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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#12 of 20 Old 04-01-2008, 11:31 AM
 
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#1 was an easy, natural hospital birth (no meds, no epidural), #2 was an almost-too-fast-barely-got-there-in-time birth center birth.

for #3, i'm working on talking DH into a homebirth (given the way my last birth went, there's no way we'll get anywhere in time if we actually have to leave the house ).

i've made an appointment at a birth center that does mostly homebirths...
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#13 of 20 Old 04-02-2008, 03:48 AM
 
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UC with dh and the rest of the ensemble doing the filming, though I am relatively sure that will involve us having to get 4 more cameras !! I have an awesome mw who is totally fine with being my long-distance cheering section, if I want to call her, and she is also fine with us calling with a birth announcement. My first birth was a hospital birth and then two mw attended homebirths. With my fourth we called the mw and she didn't make it, it was much better that way because when she did show up, she was not very pleasant. The last was a planned UC and though we did transfer after he was born, it was an isolated problem that wouldn't happen again.
So this time hopefully I will get into some sort of water, I would love to experience getting more than a washcloth of water on my body while in labor. My family has trend toward very precipitous birth and I feel safest planning to be home rather than being on the side of the road or in an ambulance.
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#14 of 20 Old 04-02-2008, 01:38 PM
 
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Thanks so much, KJad29. We do have a birth center in Indy, but I was told they cannot do VBAC or they will lose their license??

While I might be open to home birth, dh is not. Any advice on dealing with this? I have fantasies about just waiting until I'm in labor and then refusing to get in the car. There actually might be some flexibility there as he refused a doula last time around, but then we got to a place where we didn't know what to do (I was on pitocin, but never progressed) and the doctor's advice was c-section.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kJad29 View Post
Have you considered a freestanding birth center? If there is one in your area, and depending on what state you live in, you can have a VBAC there. It's like your home, but you're away from it. Basically a homebirth is like a birth center birth, only you're at home, the exact opposite. They bring all the equipment and stuff to your house for a homebirth. Basically, if you're feeling reluctant going to the hospital and you still aren't comfortable with a homebirth after doing your research, then a freestanding birth center is a good compromise on the two. You can also go to your Tribe for the area you live in and ask them about how VBAC is supported in the area. Your best bet would be to stay away from the hospital though, really. That or hire a doula or midwife to act as a doula for you so that you can have the choice at the last minute whether you want to stay home or head to the birth center or hospital. Just some suggestions on where you can start your research...BTW I'm trained as a doula.
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#15 of 20 Old 04-02-2008, 09:12 PM
 
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We're planning on another midwife attended home waterbirth

DD was born in the hospital, 20+ hr labor, 2.5 hrs of pushing

DS1 was born at home, 3.5 hr labor, 20 mins of pushing

DS2 was a home waterbirth, about 3-3.5 hr labor, 10 mins of pushing

I'll know to get the tub filled up ASAP this time, they were still filling it when I started pushing with DS2
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#16 of 20 Old 04-03-2008, 12:22 AM
 
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erin holy cow, we are in EXACTLY the same place. I want a home birth and my dp said to me "I just can't do that." To which I finally said that *I* am the one having the baby, not her, and it doesn't really matter what she can do or not. SHE is convinced that we were just darn lucky that we were actually at the hospital so that DS could be born by c-section. I think there are exactly 2 people out there (my doula and perhaps my best friend) who believe that if I had stayed home longer, relaxed, and not been in the hospital with midwives I didn't know or trust and a wife who was so completely freaked out that she was of no positive effect, there could have been a different outcome.

So I remain very skeptical of hospitals and hospital birth and feel very defensive going into my first midwife appointment, even!

I am very, very lucky though, because the woman who ended up being my doula for my son being born (my first doula was getting married the next day and had to go to her wedding rehearsal... as I said before, I was 16 days past my EDD and she figured I would have had a baby by then) has agreed to be our doula this time and I now completely feel I could have a healthy, safe birth in the middle of a train station with her at my side. She was not only good for me but she was a lifesaver for my partner. She is a labor and delivery nurse at a local hospital as well so I had complete faith in her.

She and I had a long talk the other night - I cannot birth at the hospital she works at, because they don't do VBACs unless you show up at the emergency entrance pushing - but she works in the same system as the hospital I suspect I will end up at and she had a lot of thoughts about both doctors and midwives she's worked with and, surprisingly (she's VERY into natural birth), her top rec's were family physicians. And I thought about it and said wow, hey, now THERE'S a concept: work with one person your whole pregnancy, and then when you're in labor, you call that person and they personally come to the hospital to help you deliver your baby. Because my greatest fear is working with a practice where there are people I don't know or don't like (I had never met the midwife who was there when I was laboring with my son because the practice had 12 midwives and 6 clinics, and you just get who's on call that night), I thought this might be just the thing for me.

It also would work in my favor because I went 42w2d with my son - with the blessing of the OB with whom the midwives consulted - but this time around my doula said that most midwives would find me going so "late" outside of the scope of midwifery care and they would want to induce. This to me seems like the exact opposite of what you should do with someone if you're worried about uterine rupture because the majority of uterine rupture cases come from induction with pitocin. If I were working with an MD, they wouldn't have to consult with anyone. They don't answer to anyone but themselves. My doula said, wisely, that no one can know now what things will look like 36 weeks from now (but hopefully I'll have a healthy, vaginally delivered baby nursing at my breasts producing lots and lots of wonderful milk), and not to get too far ahead of myself.

I'm sorry, this is turning into a yacky, self-centered post. I just had a day of arguing with my mom about my first birth experience, and it was rough.

Erin, I wanted to say that if you can sit down and watch "The Business of Being Born" with your husband, it might be very good. And then you can tell me how it is, because my wife has stalled out our netflix queue - coincidentally, the next movie up in the queue is "The Business of Being Born"... :

The reason why your birth center probably can't do VBACs is because the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) set "guidelines" for hospitals' ability to do VBACs a few years ago that are ridiculous, and some hospitals don't have the funds to do things like keep a full anesthesia team on staff 24 hours a day - oddly enough they are able to do C-sections at any time, though.

: mama to T 9/04 and E 11/08
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#17 of 20 Old 04-03-2008, 11:21 AM
 
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I would love to have a homebirth, but my Midwife has a birthcenter and her liability insurance said they would drop her if she kept doing homebirths. I gave Birth to my last daughter at the birth center and it was great! I am just not so sure I am going to make the 45 min drive this time since last time I was only there 30 minutes or less when my daughter came out. I have very fast births and it seems every time I loose a couple of hours so this time I don't know that we're going to make it out of the house. I'm okay with that though. I would go with another homebirth Midwife, but my midwife is a good friend and I know I wouldn't be happy with anyone else. She basically is like having a UC with a wise firend in the other room. She is Extremely hands off and I love that. My first was born in the hospital about as naturally as you can in a hospital, and I don't want to go back there.
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#18 of 20 Old 04-03-2008, 12:42 PM
 
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we are planning another homebirth/waterbirth. we have the tub from our last birth, so are set with that.. now to find a midwife...

Cat - Mother to Jonathon (1-24-1987) ; Lola (3-24-2003) ; Xiola (9-27-2005) : 8 wks (4-2008) ; 11 1/2 weeks (9-2008); and 7.5 weeks (5-2010) Nana to William (3-27-2009) Blog: AmLo Farms
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#19 of 20 Old 04-11-2008, 08:21 AM
 
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We're going to a birthing center. Our first appointment there is at the beginning of next month. We haven't chosen a doula, but I think I'd like to look into finding one.

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#20 of 20 Old 04-11-2008, 08:32 AM
 
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I'm planning to VBAC at our local hospital with a midwife and doula. My last labor was wonderful up until 4 hours of fruitless pushing and discovery of breech, which ended in what was actually a very positive c-section experience. As much as I dislike the idea of surgery, it really could not have gone better, and I felt like I got 2 labors.
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