I want the pink one so I can be PRETTY!" X POST - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 11-13-2009, 12:46 AM - Thread Starter
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Also posted in the Childhood years forum, but I think it's appropriate here, maybe more so. ?

This is what my dd, 3.75y exclaimed the other day when switching the green silky she'd been dancing with for a pink one. Of course this prompted a bunch of "You are beautiful no matter what you wear" and "Green is a lovely color too!" comments from me.

We are tv-free and watch the occasional family movie together - wizard of oz, some live action stuff, we just watched Up. She's pretty clueless about the pink princess stuff, other than what she's picking up from friends. We dont go to malls and only 'natural' toy stores (since that's all that is around us). I'm not shielding her, this is just our way right now.

But today she put a sparkly head band on and her new ballet shoes and said "Now I am Special." So i asked, "Of course you are special, but what do you mean?" To my surprise/horror/dismay/amusement she screamed "Because now I am a PINK BALLERINA PRINCESS FAIRY!"

The culture really seeps in, eh?

The funny thing is, and I guess the reason I'm posting is that dd seems to be naturally inclined to be a tomboy. She likes jeans, shirts, pretends to have a penis......... She's also not as delicate as some of the other girls we know and can 'hang' with the rough boys pretty well. But it seems that she's still getting the message that 'pink' and 'sparkly' are good things and she should want them.

Thoughts? Experiences?

btw - I am going to x-post in the tv-free forum.


mama to : my spirited star 2/06, my sweet love 5/08, my little lovey 5/12, and a zinnia 3/15
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#2 of 4 Old 11-13-2009, 01:39 PM
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I personally wouldn't sweat it

DD is 2 and she loves playing in the mud, getting dirty, finger painting, pretending to be a bear, and every other non "girly" thing out there, but once in awhile she'll put on her pink play silk and dance around shrieking I'm BEAUUUTIFUL

I think balance is okay. Do I like that DD loves pink things and sometimes wants to be a pretty dancing princess fairy? Not really, but as long as she can jump in a puddle as a "princess" than I'm cool with it!

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#3 of 4 Old 11-13-2009, 09:14 PM
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Unfortunately, it's kind of like blowing against a gale. The marekting on the princess stuff is beyond any parents ability to contend with. My son who is almost 4 has never watched a minute of television nor seen even a single movie. Yet he knows about princesses and fairies, and dora and batman and thomas the tank engine. Because he is in preschool. The way I'm approaching it is to not encourage it, but not make a big deal about it. Because he doesn't really know who these characters are (I asked him who spiderman was and he said "he's a man who looks like a spider who is on lunchboxes or sometimes on a shirt".) He doesn't even get that they are tv characters. So, no big deal. I don't ever buy anything with licensed characters on it and I never will. And I'm happy to tell him why - that I don't want him to be a walking advertisement for companies that set out to make children compulsive consumers. But, liking pink and thinking that pink is pretty seems kind of harmless. I mean, pink IS pretty! Even boys think it's pretty. DS says it's his favorite color!

Attachment-Parenting mom to darling DS : (January 2006). : : : : :
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#4 of 4 Old 12-17-2009, 02:18 AM
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Some girls like pink. Some don't.

My daughter became obsessed with pink and purple and princesses when she was one-- and I can promise you she'd never seen anything more then Elmo.

I was totally determined before I had kids that I wouldn't have a pink princess....but that's who she wants to be.

And if playing pink princess makes her happy, so be it. I say don't sweat it-- they can tell when you're resisting things-- and sometimes that makes it even more interesting to them.

Welcome to the Real World she said to me, condescendingly, take a seat. Take your life; plot it out in black and white.
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