2 year old never been to doctor - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 04:07 PM - Thread Starter
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Was wondering if anyone else has a similar story to mine: I'm a 40 yr old Mom from TX who has never taken her 2 year old son to a doctor. I wanted to have him at home and had a midwife but wound up getting an infection of the uterine lining due to water breaking with no labor ensuing. Long story short had to have C section due to infection complications which broke my heart.

My son was born healthy and had all the usual checkups at the hospital. My midwife did all the well baby visits for the first few months. I knew I did NOT want him vaccinated so was in no rush to find a doctor. Here it is 2 years later and I still have not taken him. He has had only 3 minor illnesses in these 2 years which were easily treated at home.

I have extensive knowledge of herbal and homeopathic healing methods and have always incorporated those. Having that knowledge also keeps me from freaking out and not knowing what to do when he does seem a little "off". I realize there may be a time in the future, though, when what I can do at home may not be enough and he will need a doctor. I've searched online a few times for one who is non-vax friendly but always had a sick feeling in my gut that I shouldn't take him just to take him. He is the healthiest, happiest child I know who is in the 95th percentile on height and weight. Just a big, healthy boy with a great disposition.

Now, of course, I feel as if I will be reprimanded or looked at as a horrible mother for not having a doctor for him or taking him to "well" visits all the time. I even fear a doctor may call CPS or something on me. Is there anyone else out there in this same situation?
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#2 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 04:14 PM
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I haven't taken my son since he was four months old when I stop vaccinating. If there is no reason to go, why would you go? Well-baby visits were invented during the depression when doctors needed the extra income. Check out How to Raise a Healthy Child in Spite of Your Doctor by Robert S. Mendelsohn MD. It's definitely a worthwhile read.

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#3 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 04:19 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks sweetpeppers. The book you mentioned is part of my library on raising healthy children. I agree it's a good one! May I ask how old your child is?
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#4 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 04:28 PM
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Going to a doctor if/when you need one may not be the big deal you think. Our current doctor didn't ask for records from the old doctor's office for the kids. If they'd never been, she wouldn't know, and honestly I don't think she'd care. As far as I can tell, our doc doesn't care that the kids aren't vaccinated and that we rarely see her, but I've found it helpful to know her when I've needed a couple referrals.

If you have a few names that you could try if you needed to see someone, that could help your peace of mind, knowing that maybe they wouldn't have openings and you'd need to go to an Urgent Care place, but that's not the end of the world.
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#5 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 06:42 PM
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My 3 1/2 yr. old DD has never seen a Dr. No need. I',m not the least bit worried about her. My older children haven't been to a Dr. in about 7 years. (My 1 yr. old has been several times, but she has some pretty serious weight gain/feeding issues as a baby.)

~Marie: Mom to DS(17), DS(16), DD(14), DD(10), DD(8) & someone new on the way.
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#6 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 06:48 PM
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similar situation here -- kids who haven't needed to see a doc much. My 2.5 yo has never been (besides the hospital - also c-section), and my almost 5 yo just went in a couple weeks ago to urgent care. I told the PA there that we were new to the area and didn't have a ped yet (kinda true) and that was that. My 6 and 8 yo have each had a school physical a couple years ago - but it was at a walk-in clinic with a NP.

I wouldn't worry about it -- it's not medical neglect to not take your kids in when they are healthy. I believe doctors are for sick/hurt people and have never hesitated to take my kids in to be seen if I had any concerns. We've just been lucky that in 8 years and with four kids, it has been very infrequently.

eta: oh, I just thought about this: when my 3rd child was 16 mos. old I took him into a peds office b/c I thought maybe he had a hernia (my oldest son did as a baby, so I was concerned) he didn't, but OMgoodness - the PA really did freak out a bit on me and couldn't believe that he'd never been seen in 16 mos. She kept saying, "he's never been sick?" well, yes, he's had minor colds a couple times, but nothing that required medical care, lady. I mentioned that my mom was a CNM and had looked over him from time to time and that seemed to calm her down a bit. She also pushed the vax issue, and gave me a bunch of propaganda on paper. The worst thing of all (and what made me never go back there) was that she attempted to retract my DS after I mentioned not touching him there. . I do think, of course, it's important to find a HCP that you are comfortable with in case of concerns that don't warrant an ER visit -- but man, I wonder what that PA would think to find out my DS not only went 16 mos w/o a major health concern but that he hadn't been seen in almost 5 years (until I took him in a couple weeks ago).

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#7 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 06:53 PM
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We only did wbv with my oldest, I think he has seen the doctor twice since then. DD was born in the hospital, got stitches when she was learning to walk and busted her eye in the doctors office while I was there for myself, and was seen twice in the ER. DD2 was also born at the hospital and in NICU for several hours and has been to the ER once. DD3 saw the doctor once so he could sign a paper stating she existed. DD4 was born at home and has never seen a doctor - she just turned one.

We don't vax and I do a lot of reading on health stuff and alternative ways to treat illness. I wouldn't hesitate to take them to the doctor if I felt whatever was wrong was outside my realm of knowledge but so far we are doing pretty good.

I am not overly concerned about CPS, but have been thinking it'd probably be a good idea to keep some records of my own on how much they weigh, growth, etc...
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#8 of 13 Old 12-15-2009, 09:23 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks everyone for replying...it makes me feel better that I'm not the only one with an "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" mentality.
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#9 of 13 Old 12-17-2009, 12:34 AM
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My DS is almost 2.5 and has only been twice. Once for rubella (because I didn't know what it was, being too inexperienced as a momma), although he wasn't really sick, I just wasn't sure what it was..and then we actually took him this week because we all have H1N1 and I just couldn't handle it on my own.

So...we haven't done well baby visits or anything and the doc we went to this week did not ask for records, did not ask about vaxes, and did not pressure us on well baby visits or anything else for that matter. I think the fact that he is a DO helped, rather than an MD, although our old doc was an MD and he was a holistic MD.

Anyway, I say just take that happy healthy boy only if he really needs to go, and keep doin' what you're doin!
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#10 of 13 Old 12-17-2009, 01:25 PM
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You're not alone, my kids rarely go to the doc. My 5 yr old has been in for a physical(required for preschool) the last 2 yrs but no sick or well visits since she was under a yr. My son went to one well visit at 4 months and then not again until he needed one for preschool this past May. I've never had a doc care.

If they get sick, we treat them at home. Doctors can't do anything for normal colds or viruses anyway.

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Evelyn~ 10/9/10

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#11 of 13 Old 12-17-2009, 06:44 PM
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My oldest is 19 he has went to the Dr more in the last year than he had in his whole life prior. Sledding accident skateboarding accident and Bronchitus.

DS15 Has been to the Dr twice in the last 10 years and maybe twice before that

DS3 hasnt been to Dr since his 1 year check up. He is healthy happy cant think of a single reason he might need a Dr.
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#12 of 13 Old 12-18-2009, 02:24 PM
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Our DD is only 12 months, but same situation having never been to a doctor. There were a few minor health concerns, so I just recently took her in to establish care with a local ND. Two birds, one stone. I don't actually think it would be an issue, but we're former (and future) foster parents, and we're pretty open about our parenting/living decisions. I know some people think we're pretty fruity, and since we have had and will continue to have contact with social services for the foster care stuff, I wanted it established that dd is being medically "monitored". I don't think it matters what form of care provider you have, but I do think having some sort of documentation could be beneficial or even crucial in some situations. Of course, chances are good that it will never be an issue.
Congrats on a healthy kiddo!

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#13 of 13 Old 04-07-2014, 12:28 AM
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My son (18 months) has never been to a doctor, he was born at home and checked out by the midwife and I just never found a doc I liked so he's never been in a hospital or drs office ever. I worry about the CPS thing too, I think its just irrational fears...but you never know! I feel like its been so long now it would be hard to find a PEDI. I even let my WIC go because I didn't have the shot records they asked for and I was scared to tell him he didn't have a Pedi! 

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