When will my libido come back? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 09-06-2007, 05:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I hope this is an appropriate place to post this.

My baby is almost 8m, and I still have NO libido whatsoever. My poor dh is going nuts. I have never had a strong libido anyway, but it’s really really dead now. I know that breastfeeding affects the hormones, so I’m sure that’s part of it. Neither of us wants me to stop nursing ds (he’s a pretty heavy nurser—he’s only gotten interested in table foods the last couple of weeks)…on the other hand, my total lack of drive is hurting my relationship with dh, and that’s a problem…
Is it normal to feel this uninterested for this long? Are there things I can do to help my body be more responsive? I’ve been trying to remember to take my red raspberry leaf, but we’ve had kindof a crazy month (we just moved 2000 miles) and my routine pretty much went out the window, so I’m just now getting it back together.
I would appreciate suggestions, or at least some hugs from somebody who has been there! My dh's love language is touch, so this aspect of our relationship is a really huge deal...I'm mentally all willing, but my body is just not with me, you know?!

thanks

~Jenni, rural frugal Alaskan, eternally married to Dragon
loving my wild things DS Wolf (12), 3 angels, DS Bear (6) & DS Eagle (3)
 

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#2 of 6 Old 09-06-2007, 11:16 PM
 
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That's really frustrating, as I well know. Check out the adrenal and thyroid threads and see if you have any other sypmtoms...I'm pretty sure mine is caused by my thyriod issues. I hope you get an answer soon!

caution: one-handed nak

typos likely

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#3 of 6 Old 09-07-2007, 01:59 PM
 
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When you say your body is unresponsive, what do you mean? Do you not like to be touched? Or are you dry? If you're dry, you can try using lubricant (coconut oil works good).
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#4 of 6 Old 09-07-2007, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lindberg99 View Post
When you say your body is unresponsive, what do you mean? Do you not like to be touched? Or are you dry? If you're dry, you can try using lubricant (coconut oil works good).
sometimes i'm dry...that's a simple thing to solve though.

msotly it's that i just have no hormonal drive, you know? like, i could take it or leave it...i love my dh and everything, but i don't THINK about sex. If he brings it up, sure, i'm willing...but i don't really care if we do or don't... i have no desire to try to climax (and the times i've tried i haven't been able to anyway...i haven't been able to since before this last pregnancy, and it used to be a pretty regular thing). Basically i am more than happy to help dh get his excitement...but for myself, i coudln't care less...kwim? It SUCKS!

I've had my thyroid tested before, and it came back normal...I've enver had much of a drive except when i was fertile, but i've never felt this dead, you know?

~Jenni, rural frugal Alaskan, eternally married to Dragon
loving my wild things DS Wolf (12), 3 angels, DS Bear (6) & DS Eagle (3)
 

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#5 of 6 Old 09-07-2007, 04:17 PM
 
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OK, well if I was in your situation I would consider having DH concentrate on you. Concentrate on setting a mood, doing what you need to feel romantic, etc. You deal with so much during the day, you're likely in a "mommy mode" already. Since you haven't climaxed since getting pregnant it's likely that you're not really "in the mood" and that you are not having situations set up to put you in the mood.

I would concentrate on pleasuring yourself, and have DH do the same. If you have a good experience, likely you'll start to feel less ambivalent about making further attempts.

Perpetually breastfeeding or pregnant ENFP mom to a lot of kids...wife to a midwestern nice guy...living in tropical paradise...pink cats and homebirths rock!

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#6 of 6 Old 09-07-2007, 04:50 PM
 
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