In our 40s and due in January - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 544 Old 07-06-2008, 03:41 AM
 
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Hi Laurel. Welcome and big congratulations!! It's a very exciting time for all of us. Glad we can go through it together!

Juneau, hope you're feeling better. I'll keep saying that until you tell us that you are consistently. LOL. I bet it broke your heart when your DD said she doesn't like it when you're sick. And I'm sure you said "Me too!!" The one nice thing about a planned C is that you can make sure all your ducks are in a row and hey, have your nails done. I'm going to try and do it naturally but I fully understand that with twins anything is possible including them turning sideways when I actually go into labor. We're also going to see how it goes. Whatever works best for healthy baby and healthy mom is how we're handling it. I figure we've got plenty of time to see how it goes and make the appropriate decisions.

I'm sure you'll be able to work in another few weeks when you're finally on the upswing. And huge bummer about the other magazine getting canned. How totally disappointing especially when you liked the people you were dealing with.

To answer your question about my freelance work, I'm a freelance Associate Director working on mostly live variety and reality shows. I start work tomorrow on "Big Brother" where I'm the AD on the live show where the houseguests get evicted. It's a great gig since it's only 1.5 days a week which is perfect for the summer. This will be my 5th season working on the show. At this point, I'll make it through the season on "BB" which ends mid-September and that might be it workwise for me. My doctor said maybe I could work in October if I got a few days and we know it's not stupid hours but I'm not holding my breath on that. We'll see. I'll probably just enjoy being on my behind and trying to keep the two beans in as long as possible.
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#62 of 544 Old 07-07-2008, 05:30 PM
 
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Welcome Laurel!

Hockeylover I love that show!
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#63 of 544 Old 07-07-2008, 08:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Today was a good day.
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#64 of 544 Old 07-07-2008, 09:20 PM
 
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Yay for good days:!
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#65 of 544 Old 07-08-2008, 06:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I threw up this morning, but only because I didn't get enough to eat for breakfast.

But other than that, it was a good day again. I saw the doctor, heard a heartbeat (156 BPM), and got released from every-three-week visits to every four weeks.
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#66 of 544 Old 07-10-2008, 05:21 PM
 
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Thanks for the visit and the congrats Juneau. I will admit that I've been lurking on this thread to see how you and Juls and Vicki are doing

Me (42), DH (41), DD (7), DS1 (5) and DS2 Aug 02/09
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#67 of 544 Old 07-10-2008, 10:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome Veganmama! So glad to see you here!!!

BTW, I am officially changing my "mood" from "sick" to "tired." An improvement!
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#68 of 544 Old 07-11-2008, 01:04 PM
 
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hey, folks. i just wanted to add myself to the knocked up group.

first let me tell you that i am a grieving mother. i lost both of my twin sons, arthur at 10 days in november, and erik at 3 months in january. the hole that this has left in my life has been unbearable which is why i decided to ttc. i found a sperm donor and got lucky on my first good try (i had tried once before but it was sloppy and badly timed). i am not trying to replace my sons. i could never do that. but at 41 and with no other children i also couldn't bear the thought of living the rest of my life with no child to love. i wouldn't want to live that life. so here i am.

i have my first drs appointment next wednesday for blood work and the introductory basics, then the ultrasound the following week, then meeting with the dr on the 31st. my due date is 2/26/09. i am a bundle of nerves about the upcoming appointments and i am dying to hear that freaking heartbeat(s). i wanted to do the us on the first visit when i will be exactly 8 wks but they said it was too early and they wouldn't necessarily see/hear what they wanted to see/hear. when i was pregnant the last time they heard a heartbeat at 8 wks in the e.r. am i out of my mind to think that they could at least hear the heartbeat at my 8 wk appointment? i'm just so anxious to know everything is ok, especially because of my history. i am so afraid they will tell me that there is no baby in there. i am trying to think positively and consider how fast i got the bfp, telling myself everything is surely fine and this must be meant to be! but i will feel much better when i hear that heartbeat, i'm telling you.

btw, my plan is to find a midwife and have the baby at home. but i'm going to do 'shadow care' with a dr until the delivery date.

thanks for letting me join your forum.

erik and arthur's mommy
erika

41, 7wks2days via home insemination with kd
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#69 of 544 Old 07-11-2008, 05:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Erika, welcome! And I totally understand your concerns. My doctors' appointments have made me more nervous than anything! I've had two ultrasounds and two doctors' visits, and each time, for at least a few days beforehand, I've been scared to death that the U/S / doppler / bloodwork, etc. will prove that the baby is gone. I find them not reassuring at all. Otherwise, I am convinced I am still pregnant because I still have symptoms. Although M/S is beginning to fade so now I am sure I will have days when I wonder again! Thankfully, I don't have to go again until the second week of August, so I will happily enjoy being pregnant until a few days or a week before that.

I am so sorry about the loss of your sons. How old were they? I can't imagine the pain of losing two, especially so close together. (Just reread your post and realize you did say how old they were!)
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#70 of 544 Old 07-13-2008, 01:11 AM
 
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Erika, welcome! And I totally understand your concerns.
i can't wait for my ms to fade! i don't remember feel nauseous so consistantly last time. i get sick to my stomach around noon and feel queasy until about 11 at night. eat, don't eat, doesn't matter. ugh!

so can they hear the heartbeat at 8 wks with the doppler??? am i crazy to think they can??

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#71 of 544 Old 07-13-2008, 02:30 AM
 
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Hi Erika! Welcome to this thread. I know you and your story from the TTC thread so I'm so happy that you're here and doing well, in spite of the morning sickness. And I can totally understand your apprehension. I'm surprised that the doctor told you that 8 weeks was too early to hear a heartbeat. When I went for my first US, I was about 6 weeks and we were just checking for one or two sacs (there were two) and we saw both heartbeats clearly. I was really surprised at that, thinking that I was at least 1 week early on that, but there they were. With your history, they should definitely give you the confidence that all is right in there. Insist if you can. Good luck on Wednesday. We can't wait to hear the continued good news.

Veganmama, lurk away. The more the merrier.

Juneau, are you finally over the MS? I sure hope so. Going to tired, I'll take as a good sign that you're on the upswing.

Went to my doctor the other day for another checkup. Not sure why it was two weeks instead of 3 but my next one is in 4 weeks so I'll go with that. Everything is right where it's supposed to be. The Boo-Boo's (as DD is calling them) are about 14 weeks along. Didn't get measurements but we checked and they're happy and swimming nicely. It seems that I'll pretty much have an US each appointment between my OB and my perinatologist because of age, carrying twins, etc. The Peri will make sure they're growing properly (although I haven't seen him since the BUN/nuchal fold test) and my OB is making sure they stay in. LOL. I know DD wants to come and "see" them so that's good that we can bring her to pretty much any appointment.

Other than getting biger, I'm feeling good. DH has been out of town since the 4th and comes home on Monday night. I'm sure he'll see a difference. When I was at work last week, and there are some people don't officially know that I'm pregnant. Oh, they'll figure it out in a week or two if they didn't, but still, I think there were a few friends who were probably wondering about my weight gain but since it's not totally obvious yet, they're not going to ask. One girlfriend of mine was talking to one of the men about me (not sure why but whatever) and he was saying, kindly, that he just thought I was "happy" and I had gained some weight since I last saw him in April. My friend yelled "She's pregnant with twins!" LOL. That explains it at least. I know there were a few (especially some of the men) who were scratching their heads but I could tell they're looking at my belly.

Yup, "Big Brother" is in full swing. Show premieres tomorrow night for those that follow along. Good casting from what I saw on move-in night the other day. (once again, sorry for the long winded post)
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#72 of 544 Old 07-15-2008, 01:47 PM
 
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Hi Erika! Welcome to this thread. I know you and your story from the TTC thread so I'm so happy that you're here and doing well, in spite of the morning sickness. And I can totally understand your apprehension. I'm surprised that the doctor told you that 8 weeks was too early to hear a heartbeat. When I went for my first US, I was about 6 weeks and we were just checking for one or two sacs (there were two) and we saw both heartbeats clearly. I was really surprised at that, thinking that I was at least 1 week early on that, but there they were. With your history, they should definitely give you the confidence that all is right in there. Insist if you can. Good luck on Wednesday. We can't wait to hear the continued good news.
thank you! and yeah, i was surprised that they thought 8 weeks was too early, too. maybe they are assuming that i might have the date wrong or something. they don't know that i inseminated, which means i know *exactly* when this happened! do you think they could hear the heartbeat with the doppler at 8 wks????? i don't know if i can force an ultrasound since i don't know if they have one in the office but surely they can try that. i would love it if i was pregnant with twins again. being pregnant with twins was so wonderful. when i hear you talk about it it reminds of my boys and how happy i was and how much fun it was. i'm hoping i'll get lucky considering 1) it happened once before 2) my age 3) all the vitex and maca and natural fertility boosting stuff i was taking.... maybe? don't mistake me, i'll be happy with one baby, too. it would just be so nice if it could be twins again.

anyway, what do you think of the 8 wk doppler thing?

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erika

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#73 of 544 Old 07-15-2008, 06:03 PM
 
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I don't know how strong the doppler is. My doctors did ultrasounds (internal and external) on me. But if there's a heartbeat, I would think that it could be heard. Push for it as much as possible. And yes, they can hear it at 8 weeks. I know exactly when my conception happened as well which is why I thought 6 weeks was too early and there they were. Erika, I totally get the twins vs. singleton. Just a happy healthy one or two in there is all we ask. I'm sure it'll be all good.

I'm actually feeling a little crampy today. Of course, this is putting me into a near panic. I'm also working today which makes me think when/if I should call my doctor's office. Luckily, I'm sitting on my behind completely but still, I wish it would just pass. I'll just keep drinking water and hope it goes away soon. And do as little stairs as possible.

Juneau, glad to read the reports on some good days. Finally!!
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#74 of 544 Old 07-15-2008, 06:10 PM
 
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I don't know how strong the doppler is. My doctors did ultrasounds (internal and external) on me. But if there's a heartbeat, I would think that it could be heard. Push for it as much as possible. And yes, they can hear it at 8 weeks. I know exactly when my conception happened as well which is why I thought 6 weeks was too early and there they were. Erika, I totally get the twins vs. singleton. Just a happy healthy one or two in there is all we ask. I'm sure it'll be all good.

I'm actually feeling a little crampy today. Of course, this is putting me into a near panic. I'm also working today which makes me think when/if I should call my doctor's office. Luckily, I'm sitting on my behind completely but still, I wish it would just pass. I'll just keep drinking water and hope it goes away soon. And do as little stairs as possible.
i want to push, but then i'm afraid they won't hear anything and i'll be devastated.. it's like when your ttc and you take the pregnancy test too early and get all bummed out! but i could *swear* they heard it last time at 8 wks with the doppler...

and i'm glad you understand the twin thing. i know you do. and yes, i'll be happy no matter what but i would really feel great about twins. also, i have this tiny little feeling and you may think i'm crazy for this.... but what if reincarnation is real? and what if my sons could come back to me? it's not that i won't love another baby, but i'm sure you can appreciate where i am coming from with that. i just miss my sons so much.

re: cramps. RELAX! it's probably just your uterus stretching! i had that, too, and it wasn't anything bad. your babies are growing fast and your uterus is stretching like crazy. keep that in mind. and keep taking it easy, too.
xoxoxo

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erika

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#75 of 544 Old 07-15-2008, 09:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Erika, when I had my 13-week appt last week the doctor used the Doppler but he warned me ahead of time that, "We don't always hear the heartbeat at 13 weeks." So I would think it would be pushing it at 8 weeks, because the baby is so tiny and so far down still. On U/S, you could see it, definitely. I would ask, but if they say they can't hear it, I would be afraid to make them try because you'll only be disappointed and worried if you don't hear it.

I know you must miss your sons terribly. I never thought I would have more than one child after I had dd, and then I had a surprise second pregnancy in 2006 -- only to lose that baby from a uterine infection just before 15 weeks. I have been trying to get (and stay) pregnant ever since. And even though I am finally pregnant with a sticky bean, I still feel that even after this baby is born there will still be someone missing in my family, you know? And that's nothing compared to losing your children after birth.

Hockeylover, I hope your cramps ease up soon!

I had a great day today: no m/s, no headache (my latest daily plague), and I spent the day shopping with my mom. :
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#76 of 544 Old 07-16-2008, 02:57 PM
 
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i posted this on my other forum so pardon the repeat to those who are members of both. i didn't want to type it twice.


i had my appointment today. i met with the nurse to answer a thousand questions and to have blood drawn. my ultrasound is on monday and i CAN'T WAIT. she was really really kind and so pleasant to talk to. i'm really glad i chose that office. i chose them at random so i guess i got lucky. so far. i haven't met the dr yet. but her name is heather so how mean can she be?

i asked the nurse if we could *try* to hear the heartbeat with the doppler and she said we could *try* but not to freak out of we couldn't get it. i agreed and she did try her best. we *almost* got it about five times but it kept moving away! and she said she could hear something swimming around in there. well, GOOD ENOUGH! haha! good enough for me! that is better than nothing and i'll get the deluxe treatment monday, so fine! i was very tickled and somewhat reassured by the whole thing. and she was just so so very patient and kind. so now we just wait until monday....

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#77 of 544 Old 07-16-2008, 09:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It sounds like you had a great appointment today, Erika. Hooray for Monday!

I am 14 weeks now; I can't believe it. In a few days I will be past the point at which I lost my son. So far so good, although now I am suffering from headaches.

How are you, Veganmama?
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#78 of 544 Old 07-17-2008, 03:14 AM
 
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Erika, I posted on the other thread but I'm excited for you. I know you're hoping to hear the real thing but I think the swishing is a very good sign. I guess I'm used to my doctor's sticking that ultrasound thing on (and in) me so I could see it. Your doctor on Monday will check you out and you'll be on your way. Try to relax until Monday. I'm sure the anticipation is making you crazy.

As for reincarnation, after what you've been through, I could totally see where you're coming from. And maybe it is your boys telling you that they're fine and at peace and, together, here's a brand new life to love and treasure. If you feel it, there's a reason for it. Enjoy it and feel the comfort knowing that you've got some guardian angels watching over you and the swisher in you.

Oh Juneau, I'm having horrible headaches too. Normally, I'm a headache and migraine girl and I had a few zingers my first pregnancy 5 years ago. I'm definitely having more, they're lasting longer and having more rebound headaches this go around. I asked my Dr. last week and she said it should subside by about 18 weeks. While I've been taking Tylenol, it's been completely hit or miss on being effective. Of all things, the thing that has done the trick is a Caramel Frappaccino. I'm not a coffee drinker but I do love my Fraps. I figure there's WAY more sugar than caffeine but whatever, it's managed to get my blood pumping and believe it or not, it's the only thing that has gotten rid of 3 different headaches. One had lasted 5 days, I had taken way too many drugs to no avail. I finally lost the plot and wanted the sugar and it was gone within the hour. Go figure. I don't encourage the caffeine but a little won't hurt and heck, we need to gain some weight so what's a few more carbs? LOL.

As for my cramps, thankfully, they're gone today. I had slight, and I mean, slight spotting yesterday and just felt yucky down there. I was really going nuts yesterday because, with my work today (I only work on Wednesdays) there was NO way I could get to the doctor if G-d forbid it continued. But I was fine today, thankfully! I did hear from my doctor with test results from last week. She wants me to start taking a baby aspirin daily. I've done that before so that's a pretty easy fix for whatever was slightly off. Hey, maybe it'll help with the headaches... Got great results from my BUN test so, while I'll check with my doctor to confirm, we probably won't do an amnio. Don't want those two sticks if I can help it. So, now I just need to work on gaining weight. She told me she wants me to gain 20-25 pounds in the first 20-25 weeks. I've gained about 10 in 14 weeks. I'm trying but I feel full. The belly is definitely getting bigger, no doubt about that. I guess it's not too often when you get carte blanche to eat ice cream and drink milkshakes. I should enjoy the no guilt eating, at least for a few more weeks.

VM, where and how are you? And we need updates from a few others of you out there too.

I have to say, I love this thread. I love that there are bunch of us, all within a few weeks of each other, and we're all going through various stages of the same thing. Your support has been great for me and thanks for indulging my silly, long posts.
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#79 of 544 Old 07-17-2008, 10:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Juls, I enjoy your long posts!

Caffeine has been working for me too; Tylenol less so. Exercise also helped the other day; I will try that again this morning. I had been decaffeinated for so long it feels strange to actually drink tea with caffeine in it, but it works, so I'll keep doing it. Last pregnancy I wanted a cola but this time I'm really down on sweet things, for the most part.

I lost about 6 lbs in the first 13 weeks, and seem to be gaining, albeit very slowly, right now. I still don't want to eat very much although I do have to eat frequently. I am not quite back to where I started. I only want to gain about 20 lbs though, through the whole pregnancy, so not gaining right now is fine with me. I figure I'll put most of that on in the last trimester.

My belly is starting to make my back ache a bit -- and we've got six months to go, oy!

I'm so glad to be feeling more or less human again, but my energy level is still very low. Just taking it one day at a time, and very easy.
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#80 of 544 Old 07-20-2008, 04:54 AM
 
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Juneau, I hear you on the backaches. My upper back is killing me. I might have to see the chiropractor this week. Hey, if he adjusts me neck too, maybe that'll help with the headaches.

Yes, I had another one yesterday and my Caramel Frap took the edge off. It still surprises me, but I'd rather spend the $4 than keep taking Tylenol which really isn't doing anything and continue to suffer.

I hope you can keep that weight to only 20 pounds. Since you lost at the beginning that shouldn't be too tough to stay within that range. My doctor told me she wants me to gain 45-60. OY! I gained 40 with DD but I don't want to be near 60. I've still gained only about 10 pounds. I'm also having trouble eating full meals. I do better noshing and smaller meals throughout the day. I think I need to make ice cream one of those meals though. I've got to put on the weight. It's strange that it's not happening but when I'm full, I'm really full. Just wait until we're 7 months along. I'll just keep plugging and eating away and hoping for the best.
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#81 of 544 Old 07-20-2008, 03:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Caffeine is the only thing that really seems to work for me. And I'm finding that if I have it ASAP after the headache comes on -- which is almost like a clock at 11 a.m. or noon -- the faster it goes away (and doesn't come back till the next day).

Enjoy your ice cream! I still can only eat a little bit of sweets. I guess that's a good thing! Normally I'm all over desserts and chocolate; can't have enough. My dd has been telling me for the past couple of months that she will "eat all the chocolate chips out of my [cookie, ice cream, scone, whatever] for me." Such a thoughtful child!

Do you have a chart that tells you how much weight to gain by a certain time in order to reach your target at the end? I remember seeing those last time around but can't find one this time. I'd really like to know, for example if I've gained 10 lbs by week 20, say, whether that'd be too much or not. I want to pace myself so I don't gain too much. You have the opposite problem, I guess! I am just so thankful that I can : again. For a while I couldn't even look at that smilie without feeling nauseated.

I think I remember Veganmama saying she was going on vacation, so that's why we haven't heard from her. I hope she's having fun -- but getting sick, too!
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#82 of 544 Old 07-20-2008, 03:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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P.S. I'm changing my mood again, to "relaxed." : I'm finally not so darn tired all the time, although I do have to sleep about 10 hours at night.
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#83 of 544 Old 07-21-2008, 02:48 AM
 
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Caffeine is definitely the trick for my headaches too. Not Tylenol. And normally (non-preggo times) that's definitely not the case. I had a headache this afternoon, went to dinner with some friends and drank a Coke. Not my first choice of sodas but it definitely helped. I'm really hoping my doctor is right and that they subside by week 18. That's about 3 weeks of torture to go.

I'm not exactly charting my weight gain. I know where I started and I know that I need to be about 10 pounds heavier in the next 8 weeks. I'm keeping a pregnancy journal and about once a week they have me chart my weight so I keep up with it there. I need to do some belly measurements though.

I know Veganmama is back. I saw her post on the TTC thread. Hope she stops by here soon since she's got a sticky bean too. YAY! VM, where are you? We missed you. How was your trip??
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#84 of 544 Old 07-21-2008, 09:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Must vent about dh's cooking!!! He is a hit-or-miss cook at best, chooses not to use a recipe -- or when he does, doesn't follow it. Once in a while he will hit on something totally delicious, but he won't be able to repeat it because he doesn't remember what he's done.

Anyhow, I probably shouldn't complain, because at least he is cooking, and I certainly am not... but I think he knows by now that onions are giving me terrible heartburn these days and spaghetti sauce and I are not getting along very well either. But for dinner tonight he served pasta with tomato sauce, and a side of overcooked zucchini smothered in onions, and another side of ridiculously undercooked beets. I ate plain pasta and made him cook the beets a lot more before I would touch them. I couldn't even stand the smell of the cooked onions. Now I am hungry, with nothing proteinaceous to nosh on, but think I will just take my heartburn meds and go to bed.

Actually, this really should be a complaint about my MIL, because she was too busy waiting on everyone in the household to bother to teach her sons how to cook, do laundry, or clean. GRRRR...!!! The last two have been rectified to a certain extent though dh will only clean if really pushed to do so and does not ever see dirt.

In my household, on the other hand, my brothers and I were all expected to pull our own weight. We all learned to cook, etc., and I also became quite handy with gardening, engine repair, electrical wiring, and general fix-it stuff.

OK, end of vent. Back to our regularly scheduled programming...

Veganmama, please check in and tell us about your vacation!
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#85 of 544 Old 07-21-2008, 11:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by juneau View Post
Must vent about dh's cooking!!! He is a hit-or-miss cook at best
o, you poor thing! i lived with a cook like that. sometimes it was great and sometimes it was just nasty. maybe keep protein snacks around like cheese or boiled eggs. grill some chicken breasts and slice them up and then stick them in the freezer to grab down a quick snack. some of that with some cheese wrapped in a tortilla would be great.... jeez, i wish i was eating that right now.

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#86 of 544 Old 07-21-2008, 11:14 PM
 
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my appointment was GREAT! i saw the baby and i got some GREAT pictures! and the little heart was just pounding away at 165 beats per minute. i was thrilled. what a relief!!!! i feel like everything just might be ok....


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#87 of 544 Old 07-22-2008, 09:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yay, Erika!!! : I am so happy for you. I know that must be a huge relief!
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#88 of 544 Old 07-22-2008, 02:56 PM
 
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yes, HUGE!!!!! i'm starting to think it just might be ok...

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#89 of 544 Old 07-25-2008, 03:53 PM
 
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Hi guys, thanks for thinking of me. I am just soooooooooooooooooo exchausted and starting to feel a little yucky (which is probably a good sign).

I don't get a u/s until Spet 8th though (I'll be 12w3d) so I remain unconvinced that this is a sticky bean thus far. I do have the sore BBS and the incredibly vivid dreams of my first 2 PGs though and I didn't get that far in Jan/Feb.

I am so glad you guys are all doing so well!!!

Sunrise m/c this week, she was about a week ahead of me. She seems to be doing well but I know it has to be tough.

Me (42), DH (41), DD (7), DS1 (5) and DS2 Aug 02/09
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#90 of 544 Old 07-25-2008, 11:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Veganmama, thanks for checking in on this thread! I had about given up on you since you started your own 40+ thread in the March DDC. But this thread is all TTC-over-40 grads, so I hope you will stick with us! It'll be great to keep up the conversation.

Thanks for letting me know about Sara, though I'm sorry to hear the news. I hadn't read that thread in a few days.

I'm feeling great these days, hallelujah!! : I am back to swimming and riding my bike, activities I had given up entirely these past couple of months. I felt terribly guilty driving everywhere since we live in a small town and most things I need to do are at least bikeable, if not walkable, but I just.couldn't.summon the energy to do either of those things.

I know it's hard to wait for your u/s but I consider your exhaustion and m/s a very good sign!
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