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-   -   In our 40s and due in January (http://www.mothering.com/forum/450-january-2009/896399-our-40s-due-january.html)

juneau 05-12-2008 09:59 PM

Hi, I've noticed several of us are in our 40s, so I thought I'd start our own thread. Who else wants to jump in?

I'm 44 (will be 45 in Nov.) and due Jan. 14. I'm still nursing my 3-year-old dd.

Who have you told? I've told my midwife and perinatologist; other than that, I've been keeping quiet. It'll be the third time I've announced "I'm pregnant" this year and the successive losses seem to be hard for others to deal with. I'm hoping for a sticky, healthy babe this time!

OK, enough about me. How about you?
(Doulamomvicki, what's your "miscarriage protocol"?)

Prism 05-13-2008 12:19 AM

Can I join at 39???
I thought I was the oldest here so how relieved I was to see others in the "mature" age group gestating! I'm also nursing my 3yo.

I've only told friends who have been supportive of my not-so-excited state and have helped me with that. There is too much going on in my family right now to tell: my cousin (also age 39) just m/c a much wanted and tried for babe, and my bro and wife are pregnant w their first and I don't want to steal their lime-light. Their was a death in the family over the weekend and a wedding coming up and I'm expecting some flack from my MIL about having too many kids..............sorry to rant

doulamomvicki 05-13-2008 03:34 AM

Juneau and Prism

I am 39, will be 40 in July. If this babe sticks it will be my 5th child. I am keeping this pregnancy quite too. I know all too well that having to explain a loss to many people makes it that much harder on me.

My OB prescribed vaginal progesterone, aspirin 81mg, prednisone 5mg 2x's day. I am not too happy taking all these meds but I am will to try anything at this point not to m/c.

Hoping and praying for a sticky babes for all of us

juneau 05-13-2008 06:23 AM

Hi Prism. Welcome! I'm sorry about your cousin; I know what that feels like, on the other end. Make sure you reach out to her especially when you tell the family your news. My SIL (we were pregnant at the same time; I lost my baby in the 2nd trimester) ignored me completely and I was so hurt by that. She wanted to spare my feelings but that's not how it felt to me. We still haven't forgiven each other and it's been almost 2 years.

Vicki, how long do you have to be on the prednisone? All the rest sounds OK but I think that would be tough to take for a long time.

Since my cycle was a canceled natural FET where I got pregnant anyway, I have a filled prescription for prometrium (oral progesterone) that I haven't been taking. I had bloodwork drawn last week to check HCG and progesterone, but the lab sends it out and the results haven't come back yet. And the doc has been decidedly lacksadaisical about a repeat blood draw. Luckily, I'm not spotting and having normal pregnancy symptoms so I'm not too worried about it. Still, I'd like to know.

Have you told your dc? I haven't told my dd yet.

Prism 05-13-2008 09:47 AM

Juneau, thanks for that tip about my cousin; I am hoping she will get pregnant and call me w the news and then I can tell her mine; but I will make sure to call her either way.

juneau 05-13-2008 10:33 AM

Hey Prism, where are you in the lovely Midwest? I am in northeastern Ohio.

doulamomvicki 05-13-2008 08:46 PM

I am going to be on prednisone until 22wks

I am not telling my dc's until I am at least 14wks. They are older and the prior m/c's were really tough on them.

juneau 05-13-2008 09:47 PM

22 weeks! Yikes!

I got my HCG/P4 back, finally: 347 and 23.8, respectively, at 15 DPO. Pretty good for an ancient mama, I think. Going for a repeat draw tomorrow (and another LONG wait for results, I'm sure).

I'm not sure what to tell dd. She wasn't old enough to remember my first loss, and the two last summer were pretty brief pregnancies, so even though she knew about them, I don't think my losing them bothered her all that much.

But my nipples are SOOOO sore, and she keeps asking "Why, mama?" and I keep not answering. So I haven't told her. On the one hand, I want her to know; on the other hand, I'm not sure I'm ready for her to tell anyone else!

Prism 05-14-2008 04:39 PM

doulamomvicki that is a long time! You must be a great secret keeper?

Juneau I am in Illinois, home of midwife-hating doctors, haha.
I have a friend in Canton which may be close to you, though!

q: why all the level testing? just curious.

juneau 05-14-2008 10:16 PM

I used to live in Chicago... Canton is about an hour and a half from me, and it's near where my mom grew up.

I am having levels checked for a bunch of reasons. First of all, my last pregnancy was an ectopic that followed so closely after my previous miscarriage that my midwife didn't believe I was pregnant until my tube ruptured. That was somewhere between five and six weeks, with an HCG only around 2000.

My perinatologist wanted me to call on day one of a so I did. Progesterone and HCG monitored until 6000, then an ultrasound to check uterine placement, and then, I hope, hands off for the rest of the pregnancy.

Secondly, this pregnancy happened when I was supposed to be having a natural (albeit progesterone-supplemented) frozen embryo transfer, and the cycle was canceled because my lining was too thin at transfer, and my estrogen was too low. I just want to make sure my old body is cranking out enough progesterone to keep this baby in, since I didn't actually take any of the supplements!

Also, I had three losses in a row and I'm just a little bit paranoid.

Dd has been bugging me SOOOO much today. I don't know if it's her or me or the combination of us both being just a bit more tired and cranky than usual, but I just can't stand it!!! Thank goodness dh is home from work this week or I don't know what I would do with myself. Just now I slammed my door and barricaded myself in my office. I'm contemplating just going to bed in here and not even trying to nurse her to sleep. Oy!

How are you coping with your other dcs these days?

ktmama 05-15-2008 12:09 AM

Hi Mamas! I don't know if I'll be here for long, but I do feel that I need some support today. I just turned 43 in April and had a m/c at 11 weeks in February. I'm due 1/18/09 with this babe, but just started spotting today!

I don't normally do any medical testing or interventions (I've had two homebirths and no ultrasounds until my m/c), so I guess I'll take another pg test if I keep bleeding, and hope upon hope that it stops soon. It's weird to be having pg symptoms while at the same time spotting.

Prism 05-15-2008 12:51 AM

oh ktmama, I am rooting for you and your little one!

doulamomvicki 05-15-2008 02:25 AM

Welcome ktmama! Praying for a for you and all of us. I had spotting with all my pregnancies that stuck. With the m/c's I started right with bright red blood.

Prism Actually, I am terrible at keeping secrets. Even my own

Today my boobs are huge and killing me, I have heartburn/slight nausea and am dead tired. I have never been so happy to feel this way

juneau 05-15-2008 08:26 AM

Welcome, ktmama, I hope you have a healthy and happy nine months with us. I am sorry about the spotting. I know it's especially scary after a recent loss.

juneau 05-23-2008 11:04 AM

bump!

juneau 05-23-2008 11:12 AM

How is everyone? Are you all still with us?

I'm traveling this week and just started having bad morning sickness. I threw up brushing my teeth yesterday; a low point. But it's all good. I have an ultrasound Tuesday, and am hopeful that I will hear good news. :

doulamomvicki 05-25-2008 12:20 AM

Hey there! How is everyone doing?

juneau Traveling and m/s don't mix well. Hang in there

My hcg was 13127 at 5.3 Weeks - kind of high. I had a repeat Friday so we shall see

juneau 05-25-2008 07:04 AM

Actually, Vicki, that sounds about right. I had mine last drawn at 5 weeks and it was 3557. It was more than doubling in 48 hours at that point, so it would have been at least 16,000 by 5.4. A repeat draw is a good idea, though, you can't say anything from one number.

I am having such a hard time nursing dd (3). Latching on is so incredibly painful. I do everything to try to distract her. I hate doing it because she's sad about it (at least at bedtime, other times she doesn't seem to mind so much) but I just.can't.nurse her to sleep any more. I don't want to give up nursing entirely but once or twice a day would be enough for me (had been 6-8 times a day).

What are you doing to get through the nausea? I am eating as often as possible, starting with a glass of milk at 6 a.m. before going back to bed again. I haven't been much of a milk drinker for a long time but it's just what tastes good to me now.

hockeylover 05-26-2008 04:53 AM

Hi ladies. I just made it over here and finally poking around other threads. I know some of you from the TTC thread.

We haven't told anyone other than immediate family (although DH hasn't told his Dad or brother yet) and my closest friends who knew I was doing IVF to begin with. We go back for an U/S on June 2nd and then I think after that, with the doctor's approval, we'll start to tell people.

juneau 05-26-2008 11:16 AM

Welcome, hockeylover! How are you feeling these days? Is having twins ramping up the nausea?

I had a terrible day yesterday. Dry heaves when I woke up, and it didn't really get any better all day. And we had to drive 200+ miles. Miserable.

Another long drive ahead of us now but less than yesterday. And instead of nauseated mostly I feel fatigued today, which is a huge improvement. But I'm not holding my breath.

hockeylover 05-27-2008 09:36 PM

Actually, little or no nausea. Just a little "ick" feeling in the morning that passes pretty quickly. Thankfully, not vomiting. It's about the same as with DD but maybe a little bit more since there's more hormones running through me with two.

Mostly I'm EXHAUSTED. All I want to do is sleep, which I know is good. I try to get a decent night's sleep, get DD off to school, come home and take a nap. I'm volunteering in the class tomorrow. Hope I don't fall asleep into some green paint or anything. LOL. A friend of mine, who has twins, said that the second half of the first trimester (where we're all at now) was brutal for her with two. Maybe that's what's kicking in for me now.

Juneau, where are you traveling to? I hope you get there soon so you can finally relax a little.

juneau 05-27-2008 10:49 PM

Hi Hockeylover. It's great that you don't have any nausea. I'm pretty much queasy all day, and nothing sounds good to eat. I can't even look at the smiley with the knife and fork! Oy! And I've thrown up twice already, blech.

You're lucky that you can send dd off to school! Preschool, such as it was (2 hours a week) has just ended for us. Today I took dd to her music class and one of the moms guessed right away that I was pregnant -- I didn't think it was that transparent, but everyone commented on how tired I looked, and asked if I was feeling OK. I tried to beg off, saying I was "travelweary" but she saw right through it! Good luck staying awake in class tomorrow.

As for travel, we were coming back home after being away for 10 days. I was only feeling tired when we left but driving home was a real chore with the nausea on top of it. I feel exactly like I did when I was pg with dd, so I'm guessing another girl (which is what she hopes).

Thank goodness, it's bedtime.

doulamomvicki 05-29-2008 12:37 AM

Hockeylover

hockeylover 05-29-2008 01:06 AM

Oh man, I hear you on the "looking tired". I went to a school function last night and the one mom (she's got twins in DD's class) who knows asked how I was doing. I said "tired" and she said "yeah, you look it". Lovely. No one's asked though so I guess I'm hiding it well or people are too embarrassed in case I'm not. LOL. Good thing I'm in my "fat" jeans and I think I need to move up a bra size.

Juneau, it's a good thing that you're feeling awful. It's uncomfortable but that means those hormones are raging and that's a good thing. Sorry you feel awful but you know what I mean.

Vicki, how are you doing ?

I'm glad we're all here together.

juneau 05-29-2008 09:00 AM

I just discovered Sea Bands and I ate lunch yesterday! A huge thing for me since I haven't been able to eat much. Driving still ramps up the nausea and the smell of food is sometimes hard to take, but I can eat again. Hooray!!!! I am planning to wear them all day every day but not at night.

Vicki, how are you feeling?

clementine99 05-29-2008 09:50 AM

Hi can I join? I just posted in the roll call thread but then I noticed this one. A little about me: I'm a 39 yo SAHM with a long history of infertility. It took about a year to get pregnant the first time w the help of clomid (my twin girls just turned 4!!!!). After about 3 years of trying for a third with clomid, IUIs, injectibles- finally IVF did the job! I've had 2 losses, one at almost 12 weeks so I don't think I'll rest easy til then. There's a possibility that it's twins again- I won't find out until the end of next week. I'm going nuts with the waiting!!!!

My due date is Jan 31. Looking forward to getting to know everyone here.

Congrats to all!!!

Hockeylover- double congrats on the twins! I will be honest that I found it really challenging (although amazing too) when they were babies- but it is SO FUN having twins. Do you have the book by Dr Luke? I found it really helpful and I followed the insane eating plan. It was hard to pack on all those pounds but I ended up delivering at 40 weeks.

hockeylover 05-30-2008 04:09 AM

Hi Clementine,

What's the name of the book? Obviously, I haven't dealt with any twins books or anything yet. I think I'm just waiting for my U/S on Monday to confirm that the two are really sticking in there. I had an U/S a week ago and we saw two heartbeats for sure but only one yolk sac. The doctor wasn't concerned and was like it'll be 70% fine, but I just want to get over than hump next week before I'm full dealing with the twins thing.

IVF finally worked for us too. This was our 3rd round, my 6th transfer (several frozen egg cycles that didn't take). We're excited about twins but obviously a little scared too. Good luck for you too. I know you'll keep us posted. I can't wait to hear.

doulamomvicki 05-31-2008 05:23 PM

There is a ! We went in for a u/s yesterday and there it was! While I know I am not out of the woods yet, after seeing my babe's beating little heart I feel more hopeful about this pregnancy .

How is everyone else doing? Juneau, are your hanging in there with the m/s?

juneau 05-31-2008 07:13 PM

Congratulations, Vicki! That's great news! What's your EDD? Mine's the 14th.

AFM, I threw up the eggs I craved for breakfast. Then I called my doctor. Now I have some Zofran, and while it knocked me out for a few hours, now I feel like eating dinner is a distinct possibility.

doulamomvicki 05-31-2008 08:23 PM

My EDD by LMP is 1/19, by FF and the u/s is it 1/22.

Zofran is magical I have been on it for 4 days and feel pretty good. I take my doses when I know I will be able to nap.


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