My family HATES the name we chose - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 05:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know its our decision and all but my family's opinion (most of them at least) mean a lot to me and to us. I dont want to choose a name that they will hate.

We have decided to name our baby bean Annabelle Delilah.

My dad and sisters HATE it. They want to know why I dont just name her Anna. They said Annabelle sounds like the name of a cow. DH's mom's name is Anne, my middle name and my mom'd middle name are Ann. I want some sort of tribute that ties us together but I dont like the name Ann. I love Annabelle.
Then there is the Delilah part. Ive gotten Tom Jones jokes and "Hey There Delilah" jokes. And then someone pointed out that the meaning of Delilah is "one who weakened". GREAT! Someone said that it sounds like a country hillbilly hippie commune farmer name.
Oh and as if that werent enough, her innitials would be ADD!!

DH and I have been set on this name since before I got pregnant. We have talked about it for 2 years.

I dont want my family to give me crap for this... what do I do. I know, they are my family and they will be supportive of me and would never make fun but they twisted their noses. Adn they brought up the subject of her being teased when she is in school. I dont wanna give my baby a name that people will make fun of. Ive heard some riddiculous names and I dont think Annabelle Delilah is one of them.
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#2 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 05:08 PM
 
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Hey! I'm not in your DDC, but I had to say something. Tell them what my stepdad told me to say when the in-laws didn't like the name I picked. "Put $100,000 in a trust fund and I'll name her whatever you want!" Good luck!

:Pagan Mom to Danny and Mal , Wife to Charles Pet Parent to kitty Paige.
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#3 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 05:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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LOL! Thats awesome! Thanks!
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#4 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 05:34 PM
 
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I love Annabelle Delilah! I see a sweet little girl with curls!

As far as her initals..if she changes her name when/if she gets married she can change those then. I think it's sweet! and ADD doesn't say anything, it's just initials for something...not like my neighbor whose intials are A S S...even in monogram it's bad...lol. Think I would have kept my maiden name as middle or just kept my madien name..lol

And Delilah...people don't use middle names much. Up until last month I had never heard Tom Jones song..lol.

I love telling them about the trust fund!! I should remember that one!!

We had a similar situation with my little one..no one liked the name (Giliann). It's has Ann like yours..was partly what I wanted too. But every one said it sounded like a boys name. So we found another, actually created it and it's perfect! With so much more meaning. Raeleigh Cariann.

I guess I'm getting at I know what you mean about family not liking the name, HOWEVER..if it's special to you and has meaning...tell them to bugger off!

Hoping all goes well with the birth of Annabelle Delilah!
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#5 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 06:45 PM
 
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I don't really have any advice but I just wanted to add that I think that's a lovely and sweet name for a girl. I think it's their problem that they can't accept it. And, as with pretty much all babies and their names, it will fit your little one perfectly! Congrats on the little girl and I hope you have a great birth!
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#6 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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Hi!

Also not in your DDC, but wanted to share. Our DS's name is a bit different -- but it was my grandpa's name. My FIL (whom I don't really get along with well) was very open and vocal about not liking the name. No one else really said much. But then when DS was born, my FIL was the only person who called him by his name! Everyone else referred to him as the baby or sweetie or pumpkin, etc for at least a year!

So just because they don't like it now doesn't mean they won't accept it and go along with your decisions!

HTH!

Learning & growing & changing everyday!
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#7 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:26 PM
 
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Thats hilarious we're going through that with Delilah! Were trying out D names since mine starts with A. dh is B and ds is C and people are freaking about it!

I remember about a week b4 we had ds I told my grandma that we had decided on Caie and her answer was "well you have plenty of time to decide"...then when we told people that his full name is Myals Caie-Sun, but we're going to call him Caie, people freaked I hate that call him Myals! ERRRR....
If it makes you feel anybetter my grandma says she could never see caie as anything but caie

BTW...theres a tom jones song???? dang!

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#8 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:29 PM
 
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When DS was born, they HATED the first name we picked for him(Owen) and wanted us to give him FIL's first name instead, which is DS's middle name. After a while, they warmed up to it once they noticed that everyone they told the name to commented on how much they liked it. Thankfully, my parents liked the name and aren't picky as long as we pick something normal.

Truthfully, I like the name you picked and would have Annabelle on my list if I didn't already have a cousin with the same name.

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#9 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:33 PM
 
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Annabelle is lovely. They had their turn to name babies, now its your turn.
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#10 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:37 PM
 
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It's a beautiful name. They'll get used to it.

How about saying something like "We love it, and I hope it grows on you!" or "You'll get used to it once she's here."
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#11 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:44 PM
 
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my dad hates DS's name...Leonidas Alexander.

he says it sounds like a disease. I told him to educate himself and try to be more openminded.

And we don't go over to my dad and stepmom's place that often because they are very antiAP (especially anti BF).

it's YOUR baby...you and your DH made her and you will give birth to her...don't listen to the naysayers and surround yourself with the positive people.

my inlaws love DS's name...so we spend lots of time with them! I want my son to be proud of his name, not ashamed of it.

to you for being unique!
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#12 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 07:50 PM
 
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We ran into the same problems w/DH's family when I was pg the first time. We didn't find out the sex and his mom HATED both our boy (Ellery Duncan) and girl (Stella Christine) names. I believe her exact words were, "Ellery?! Blech! Everyone is going to call him cellery!" It was a good lesson in not discussing baby names with people before hand. I stuck to my guns despite the family opposition and gave birth to my beautiful Stella Christine. I get compliments on her name ALL THE TIME and the name really fits her perfectly. If this new baby is a boy we're still naming him Ellery. It's a name that we have loved for years and years.

Whatever name you choose, will eventually fit your child. Family will get used to it. FWIW, I love Annabelle. I love the college fund suggestion!

On a funnier note, this always reminds me of a Saturday Night Live episode. It was a couple that was trying to pick out a baby name but every name the mom came up with, the dad would find a way that kids would use the name to tease the child. Finally, he came up with a name pronounced "Ozz-wee-pay" which was @sswipe. It's not quite as funny in writing but the skit was hilarious!
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#13 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 08:01 PM
 
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Crashing your DDC from the December board... this is why we don't reveal the babies' names to my inlaws before they're born. My inlaws -- who knows how they produced my husband -- are the world's greatest muggles, to use a J.K. Rowling analogy. Their kids are named James and Kelley. We don't use boring muggle names. Once the baby is born, we're not "going to name him/her" something that makes them cringe because it's not average; that's his/her name. It doesn't mean they don't criticize, but they don't try to argue anymore once it's a done deed.

I know it's too late now for Annabelle's (very nice, btw) name to be not argued with, but next time I suggest keeping your name choices secret from people inclined to argue with them.

Nealy
mama to Robert Thales, 5; Lydia Jean, 2; and Odin Alexander EDD 12/20/08
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#14 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 08:03 PM
 
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I'm not in your DDC either, but I saw your post, and share your experience. We had trouble with DD's name being hated by MIL (she used to call her precious-- around the time Lord of the Rings was playing--cruel woman--I had nightmares!) She actually had the gall to tell me: "All of my friends think bambino's name is Sarah or Rachel" and she didn't say her name for months. Now, however, she has embraced my daughter fully, and loves her, and even calls her Audrey, or Auds, so the problem is gone.

Our list of possibilities this time was met with cringes, and suggestions for other names which were less trendy, more "normal." This from the people who named their three children in the top 50 of their years, and 2 of the three are in the top 10 (with one the #1 name of the decade).

I think Annabelle Delilah is a beautiful name, and I know that your family will love this child, no matter what. This conflict will pass, and you and DH will be thrilled to have your family embrace your beautiful Annabelle.

Good luck to you!
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#15 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 10:25 PM
 
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You love the name you and your DH have chosen. That's what counts.
Your family is being really insulting. This isn't a reality program. They don't get to cast votes. It's your child!!
If anyone mentions it again, tell them you don't want to discuss it.
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#16 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 11:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by leosmommy View Post
my dad hates DS's name...Leonidas Alexander.
LOVE that name!!
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#17 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 11:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, I am not going to let family interfere with another baby name. When I had DS, my ex's mother HATED the name I chose for him. His name was supposed to be Cory Allen (Cory being my last name/family name and Allen is my fathers middle name) My dad has 4 daughters so he never got to pass on the family name. He told me that if I ever named a son after his first name he would disown me. his name is Bruce. I agree... I HATE that name. But Cory was a good name. My Ex's family put up a stong objection. My ex's mother had him convinced that we should name him Lance... UHHH... NO! Then again my ex has an older son named after himself, his father, his grandfather, and his great grandfather.

So we compromised and named him Dylan Cory ***. His name suits him now but I really disliked it for a long time. I was almost bitter about it. Especially when my mom was coming up with cutesy names for him and accidentally called him "Dyldo"

We started calling him Cory and now he is back to Dylan because it feels right. We call him Dyl, Dylbob, and Spud.

But nobody is going to call this one but me and my DH... We are standing firm!!
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#18 of 56 Old 08-20-2008, 11:34 PM
 
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So we compromised and named him Dylan Cory ***. His name suits him now but I really disliked it for a long time. I was almost bitter about it. Especially when my mom was coming up with cutesy names for him and accidentally called him "Dyldo"


Oh man, I almost choked laughing at that one. Dyldo? hahahahahahahaha!

i am glad you are standing firm. And if it's any consolation, my initials are ADD and I'm perfectly fine with them being that way--I didnt even change my last name when I got married. Don't worry about it!

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#19 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:09 AM
 
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This is exactly the reason no one will ever know what I am planning on naming a child until they're born.

Honestly, though, it's not a bad name, and it's YOUR decision.

Newly single, chronically sleep deprived mama to my little wild thang wild.gif, born 11/17/12 

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#20 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 05:55 AM
 
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First, you can name her Anna and kids will still make fun of it. ANY name will get made fun of--it's how kids are. Your family can get over it. My sister called her daughter Ally--I hated it. I got over it and when she got older, she dropped it for Alex (which I adore). Her other daughter's name is Sydney, which I also strongly dislike. Again, I got over it. It's not my kids, it's not my business!

Personally, I'm with you--Ann is boring, so is Anna. Annabelle is beautiful (well, since it partly MEANS beautiful... lol). I even have a character in the book I'm writing who has that name and comments that she hates that everyone calls her Anna when she wants to be called Belle (just brought up that memory, lol, that was years of writing ago at the beginning of the book! yes, I'm slow). I've named a few fictional characters Annabelle and I think it's an awesome tribute name!

As for Delilah... there's a song for most girls' names if you look for it. And no one ever seems to like the song for their name. Don't worry about it. And no, it doesn't sound like a country singer. For crap's sake, I'm in Missouri and didn't get a slight 'South'/'Hick'/'Redneck' twinge from it (and I've got quite a few hicks/rednecks in my family--I'm not one of them, they drive me nuts--and DH, too, who feels the same about the rednecks in his own family).

This is why we're not sharing our baby name. It's not their baby to name and they will get over it or create nicknames that they prefer.

I have one friend who wanted her son called Xander. Well, she was going to name him Alexander, but her mother or MIL, can't remember which, said she didn't like Xander and would call him Alex. Well, my friend didn't like Alex. So her son was born and she named him just Xander. Not to spite anyone, but because that was the name she wanted him to have.

Use the name your DH and you love. Tell your family that you're saddened that they don't love the name like you do, but that it isn't their child to name and you hope that they can find some good in it. Tell them to call her Anna if they're so inclined. She'll choose her own path, as far as names go, as she grows.

My daughter is Lillyanna--she has a few choices for nicknames in there (Lilly, which we call her, Lia, Lianna, Anna, Ann) and that was deliberate. It's my favorite name and DH thought it was pretty, so we went with it. I can't imagine anyone not loving Annabelle! I hate that I never had an option for nicknames with my name. I believe in giving as much option for that as possible

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#21 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 08:20 AM
 
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I don't get why others think they have some say in naming another person's child--unless those parents ask for opinions, you know? I knew my family wouldn't be thrilled about the name we've chosen for this one, but my mom just said, "oh I'll love it once she gets here". That's a good attitude to have--hopefully your family will see it that way eventually.


My dh's office manager said, "eww, that's awful."

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#22 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 10:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My daughter is Lillyanna--she has a few choices for nicknames in there (Lilly, which we call her, Lia, Lianna, Anna, Ann) and that was deliberate.
My DD's name is Madeline Elizabeth. We've called her Maddy since she was born. I didnt know if I should pronounce her name Mad-a-lynn or Mad-a-line so I decided to let her choose. I am SOOOO glad she chose Mad-a-line. But she has many options beyond Maddy or Madeline, her middle name is Elizabeth and there are DOZENS of nickname variations.

I got made fun of for my name. My name is Alexis. I got a lot of rhyming. Lex rhymes with sex, Sexy Lexy, Alexis/Texas... Annorexis, Dyslexis, My dad drives a Lexus... BLEH! It wasnt until recently that I started liking my name and I also started letting my friends call me Lex. At work I am Alexis but around friends and family I am Lex.
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#23 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 10:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Annabelle is lovely. They had their turn to name babies, now its your turn.

They also arent the ones birthing the baby (which if genetics work the way I think they will, she will be HUGE... h2o homebirth should be interesting... DH is the smallest of his mom's brood and he was 10lb 12oz. I was the smallest of mine at 7lb 14oz)
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#24 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 10:53 AM
 
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No advice... just wanted to say I love the name... I was reading through and read the name and was like "that is so pretty! what on Earth could people not like about it??"

Tell them to get over it!

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#25 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 11:00 AM
 
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my family didn't like my son's name at first and were pretty vocal about it. but oh well! i love it and i can't imagine him being named anything else.

she's YOUR baby. name her what you love.

its a beautiful name, btw.
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#26 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:16 PM
 
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I know how you feel. We get this everytime with our kids names. I like unsual names or unusual spellings. Our first was Mackenzie, FIL called her Big Mac just to be spiteful. Now she is Kenzie.

If you love the name go for it. They'll get over it. I LOVE the name by the way.
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#27 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:28 PM
 
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I think it's a cute name. If she's not fond of Annabelle herself once she's older, then she has the option of going by Anna, Ann, Bella, Belle, Elle, or Ella. I think it's a great name!

I made the mistake of telling IL's one of the names we were considering. MIL actually had the balls to say "Well, you'll just have to come up with something better." I was flabbergasted at how rude she was. I told her that she'll just have to get used to it becuase it just might be the name if we have a boy.
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#28 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:36 PM
 
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I like it Annabelle is a very pretty girls name. I have a Nathan and he ONLY answers to Nathan ( even at 4 1/2) people can stand and say Nat or Nate till they are blue in the face and he wont answer. The first month you will have to correct EVERYONE everytime they call her Anna or Ann.. they will get sick of you saying Annabell.
They can name their next baby anything they want LOL

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#29 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My MIL and mother are stoked... My MIL's name is Anne. We all call her Annie so because of that the kids call her Nannie. I told her that we were naming her Annabelle and she clasped her hands together and boasted "Nannie's little Annie" so we know what Nannie is going to call her... LOL

My mom loves that I used part of her name. Just like my father with his name (Bruce, which he still hates) she would hate for a child to have to have her name. Her name is Lori. She said she likes it now but it was hell when she was growing up. I am happy about the fact that it ties myself, my mom, and my mother in law together. (aside from overly mothering me, its the only other common thread the two of them share.)

Madeline is already working on nicknames for her. And Dylan asked if he can call her "Belly." I told him that it might not be too highly appreciated. But it was kinda funny.
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#30 of 56 Old 08-21-2008, 12:56 PM
 
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I really like her name!

But that IS why we don't tell names before the birth of the baby. People feel too free to express their opinion before the birth. And I don't think there is any name that everyone would like. Once it's a done deal, they're less likely--'cause it would be RUDE.

Mom to 5 amazing kids! (DS8, DS7, DD4, DD2 and DS0)

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