*♦* Hope, Healing, and Conceiveing ~ April 2013 *♦* - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 04:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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~Continued from Hope, Healing, and Conceiving - March 2013~

This thread is for women who wish to conceive after a loss and need support, hope and healing. If you wish to be added to the thread or want to modify your info please make requests in bold. If you have a chart online either at TCOYF or at Fertility Friend and would like it linked with your name in the list, just post the link and add the icon in your post so I don’t miss anyone.

Bring on the babies!!



Waiting to O: 2whistle.gif


BeagleSmuggler
MommatoGray chartnew.gif
JelloPanda chartnew.gif
NSmomtobe chartnew.gif
MsBe chartnew.gif

Waiting to Know: pos.gif


zonapellucida
angelbaby84
toothfairy2be
mamacatsbaby chartnew.gif
planegreen chartnew.gif
leavesofgrass

Oh Crap! I Don't Know What I'm Doing??!!?!??!?!? dizzy.gif

whistling.gif

Waiting with Special Circumstances lurk.gif


pattimomma chartnew.gif
WildDoula
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love_r4ks chartnew.gif

Recent BFPs! rainbow1284.gif

March - unuselyriver, hippy mum chartnew.gif, 100%mom, lyterae chartnew.gif

February - Patience2013, Revolting, maszat85

January 2013 - SuzieSmiles, sarahl918

December - deborahbgkelly candle.gif, Thebyr, GraysMama, unuselyriver candle.gif

November - Porcelina candle.gif 17 weeks, J and J's Mommy



October - beingmommy, SweetMama34, Tenk, Oregon2010angel1.gif, maszat85angel1.gif



September - unuselyriverangel1.gifangel1.gifangel1.gif



August - Shell29 angel1.gif, RaineyDaye, Lisanne, BaileyB, patience2013angel1.gif



July - SilaMarila angel1.gif , writinglove, JelloPanda angel1.gif , Bena, thecoffeebean angel1.gif , patience2013 angel1.gif , BeagleSmuggler angel1.gif



June - writinglove angel1.gif , deportivo4, xerxella angel1.gifangel1.gif , Revolting angel1.gif , BetsyPage angel1.gif , CamoShades, jodieanneanton



May - AmBam angel1.gif , autumngrey, Adaline'sMama



April - stegenrae, Harmony96, beingmommy angel1.gif , thecoffeebean angel1.gif



March - confused.gif



In Our Thoughts: hug2.gif



ribbonpb.gif porcelina ribbonpb.gif 3/13


*In an effort to keep our header as up-to-date as possible, the threadkeeper reserves the right to move you to "In our thoughts" from "Waiting to O" and "Waiting to know" if you have not posted in this thread or in the previous thread. The threadkeeper may remove your name from the list if you have not posted to the thread within the previous three months. You are always welcome to rejoin the thread at any time.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#2 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 05:00 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi there ladies and welcome to the April thread flowersforyou.gif . Let me know if I need to change anything.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

Me, DH, DS1, DS2, November 2012 brokenheart.gif, July 2013 brokenheart.gif, March 2014 brokenheart.gif

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#3 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 05:06 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm feeling an odd combination of numb and sad. When Rose gets here, as I'm sure she'll come a callin' by Tuesday, Friday at the very latest, I will absolutely be changing my location to Bloody Hell as mentioned by a poster in The Worm Moon Sane TTC thread. Going to find myself some fake sushi, a beer, and a movie tomorrow or the next day; ready to get this over with...

I do hope you ladies are having a lovely weekend though blowkiss.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#4 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 09:12 AM
 
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Mamacatsbaby hug2.gif How long is your average cycle?
 


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#5 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 09:37 AM
 
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Mammacat-do you have good coverage this cycle? Have your temps stayed up like that before af?
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#6 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 12:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pattimomma View Post

Mamacatsbaby hug2.gif How long is your average cycle?

 
Thank you for the hugs pattimomma; I really needed them. My last four cycles have been 25 days. I've had 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, and 29 day cycles but 25 or 26 day cycles predominate overall. I used to think it was 26-28 day cycles I have mostly but looking back I see differently. This is 12DPO, BFN this AM with FMU using a $store cheapie. Right now I'm on CD25 and I fully expect a temp drop tomorrow and for AF to show up then or Tuesday. FF is predicting Tuesday. I'm predicting tomorrow just b/c my body seems super happy with 25 day cycles right now shrug.gif . Even if she doesn't show up Tuesday, showing up anywhere b/w now and Friday will still be within range for me. I've had O be CD's 11, 12, 13, or 14 and LP's that run the gamut of "normal". Sooooo, even though I have this insanely annoying sand grain of hope, I'd rather not. It takes way too much of my energy and I really don't have that to spare. I would prefer to get on with it so I can cry into my beer and add yet another layer of numb. Each cycle I grow more incredulous that I'm not expecting again yet. I'm being stunned into emotional purgatory. Even if I get a BFP soon I'm not sure how quickly I can, what? Connect? This is all so surreal and I never dreamed I would have to try so hard to do something our bodies are designed to do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by hippy mum View Post

Mammacat-do you have good coverage this cycle? Have your temps stayed up like that before af?
hippy mum we BD'd O-1 and O so decent coverage. O-2 there wasn't really any EWCF so I just let it ride. I do have a cycle recently where my temps stayed up then the day before AF dropped about .3 degrees then the day of AF dropped another .2. Yep, high temps mean nothing to me at this stage in the game. Usually they start dropping two or three days before AF but it's not a guarantee so I've kind of detached from all of that.

So yeah ya'll, I'm just a big ole ball of sunshine right now! eyesroll.gif Hope to be past the mire in a few days, ugh...

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#7 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 12:56 PM
 
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Subbing aka stalking :-)

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#8 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 04:54 PM
 
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Not much to share - just that I am hearing all of you, reading as we go along. Thinking good thoughts for everyone.

 

More hug2.gifcoming your way mamacatsbaby.

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#9 of 172 Old 03-31-2013, 06:30 PM
 
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Hi All,

 

Mommacatsbaby - Hugs to you.  Big ones.  It's the worst when you feel it coming. 

 

So I need some advice and this contains TMI.  For the last week and a half, I haven't had any spotting. Friday I starting spotting again but bright red.  Saturday and today it was more like period flow.  So I thought ok, AF is here and even though that is earlier than I expecting, that's great because then we can move on!  This evening I was folding laundry while standing next to the bed and I felt a clump fall out of me.  I went to the bathroom and caught it in my hand.  It was just larger than a quarter and skin colored with a little pink.  The weird thing is it was hard.  It was not flexible tissue like with a period, mucus, or other tissue.  I have no idea what to think about this.  I made DH look at it (I gave him the option to and he chose to look).  He was an EMT at one point in his life so has seen a lot and he said he had absolutely no idea what that was.  Any ideas?  DH will make me call my dr in the AM so I will be doing that and probably "demanding" to be seen, if he'll see me or thinks he needs to.  I'm at a loss... 

 

Again, please just kick me outta here if this isn't the right place to come with my problems.  I know you are all already past this and on to TTC'ing.  I am mentally ready to TTC but my body hates me!  Wah! greensad.gif


Me - 31, DH - 35, DD#1 redface.gif 11, DD#2 innocent.gif 5    TTC since 9/10    MC angel1.gif 2/11    MC angel1.gif 1/12

* * * * * * * 8 * * * 12 * * * 16 * * * 20 * * * 24 * * * * * 30 * * * 34 * * * * heartbeat.gif 40 EDD 3/10/14

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#10 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 07:57 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks so much for the hugs you guys hug.gif . I really did need them and I truly appreciate you guys listening to me happytears.gif .

planegreen I'm going to kick you anyway but not b/c this isn't the right place for you to voice what's on your mind but b/c you would even double-think whether or not you should bring it to the table. No soup for you woman! lol This whole TTCAL thing is a wobbling, winding journey and we're here for you to sound off with my dear flowersforyou.gif . Now, as far as what the hard piece of tissue could have been, I haven't a clue. Are you still bleeding? Maybe this is what's been causing your hCG to drop so slowly? I hope you've been able to get in to your doc to see if maybe he has any ideas.

Gotta go feed my kiddos. Hope you all haven't gotten burned too badly yet today lol.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#11 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 10:50 AM
 
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Mamacatsbaby How sure are you that Fertility Friend properly defined your O date? You didn't have a temperature drop this morning . . . I know you don't want to think about it so I am going to think about it for you headscratch.gif

 

Planegreen I have no idea about what that hard thing was. Did you save it and take it to your doc appointment? What did the doc say? Have they retested your hCG levels? Sorry I have no answers, only more questions.nut.gif

 

hola.gifMommatoGray and my favorite stalker Thebyr!

 

AFM - I got my last test result this morning and it was negative! On the not so great side of things a stomach bug has started up at my house and my 9yr old DD vomited 8 times between 12:30am and 4:30am. Cleaning up vomit all night was no fun and poor DD was miserable. Obviously I couldn't get an proper temp this morning and my CF is acting weird. I wonder how long it is going to take my body to reset after the pill. When I went off of the depo shot it took nine months for me to finally get AF. You can only imagine how many times I POAS during that time!
 


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#12 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 11:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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pattimomma: Yikes! I'm sorry that there's some stomach funkiness going on at home. Your poor DD fever.gif . Does it look like anybody else is about to start up? And yeah, I can only imagine how crazy things had to get with no AF for months and months. Mine is quite persistant lol, even after I got off the HBC oh so many years ago. It did mess with my cycle in a few ways that I can't exactly remember now. Took about a year to regulate and I think I'd been on them about a year? As for FF, they had my O at CD12 at first but I do paper/pencil charts as well (which I prefer) and I always had it pegged at CD13. A few days after they gave me solids at CD12 I fed the program a few more temps and it changed it to CD13 lol.gif . I'm trying not to let myself wonder if I'm a "late implanter" or whatever. With DS1 I don't think I tested 'til the day after I missed AF, with DS2 I tested BFN three days before AF was due and BFP the day I would have likely gotten AF (CD26). I felt some things going on yesterday but I'm in staunch refusal mode as far as getting my hopes up here. Thanks for trying to think about it for me instead kiss.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#13 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 12:21 PM
 
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Yay Pattimomma!! So glad your test was negative. 

 

hey everyone!


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#14 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 12:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Thebyr! wave.gif Thinking lots of good, positive thoughts for you this week hug.gif .

And I knew I forgot to add something before! Woohoo on the last negative pattimomma! I knew all would be well joy.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#15 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 12:47 PM
 
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Thank you Mamacats! I'm taking all the positive thought I can get!


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#16 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 01:57 PM
 
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mamacatsbaby I am so stalking your chart! I thought I remembered seeing 25 day cycles. I'll try not to get excited but I too have experienced the BFN and then the BFP a week later because it was just too early for my body to demonstrate a positive. My DS looked like he might be getting sick too but so far no puking. No one else has any symptoms and I hope it stays that way. I hope it doesn't take more than a couple months for my body to regulate. Actually I wish it would just go back to normal first cycle out of the gate . . . sigh

 

Thebyr I know this week is going to be hard hug.gif Lots of positivity and love coming to you and baby Thebyr dust.gif


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#17 of 172 Old 04-01-2013, 06:51 PM
 
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Aw. Thanks pattimomma, we appreciate it!

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#18 of 172 Old 04-02-2013, 08:43 AM
 
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mamacatsbaby Stalking your chart as usual. If I completely disregard your CF and look at temp only, it looks like O would have been on CD16. Making today 11DPO. Do you have coverage for CD16? I spent an hour reading through TCOYF last night trying to figure out my own cycle and I came across the following, most pre-O temps are below 97.7 and most post-O temps are above 97.8, you have two temps between those. I also read a bunch about CF not matching up with temps and how you can still O without the CF making sense with the temps. It's starting to look triphastic.  I don't really like FF calculations for myself. I like TCOYF for PC.

 

I guess I need a chart to obsess over since mine isn't very interesting orngbiggrin.gif 
 


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#19 of 172 Old 04-02-2013, 12:59 PM
 
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mamacatsbaby - Thanks for the kick :) pattimomma - I'm so happy for you that the last test came back negative! I also agree with you that CM doesn't always match up with temps. Mine never seems too. AFM - The dr office wanted me to go in for a HCG count immediately and not wait until today, Tuesday. So I went yesterday afternoon and my count was 3. So that's good and they weren't concerned further. My dr is on vacation so this was the oncall doc and while the nurse didn't say it, it sounded like maybe he was concerned I m/c'd again and so wanted my numbers tested again immediately. BUT the numbers don't say that so no idea what that thing was. So I am back to not really knowing what exactly is happening but my #s are down so that's a YAY! I decided I better temp this month and maybe that will tell me if this is a real period or not. Right now my chart has one exciting dot on it. LOL... I am still bleeding as well. I did not save the hard thing to have it looked at. The nurse did say if I would have saved it, they could have sent it in for me.

Me - 31, DH - 35, DD#1 redface.gif 11, DD#2 innocent.gif 5    TTC since 9/10    MC angel1.gif 2/11    MC angel1.gif 1/12

* * * * * * * 8 * * * 12 * * * 16 * * * 20 * * * 24 * * * * * 30 * * * 34 * * * * heartbeat.gif 40 EDD 3/10/14

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#20 of 172 Old 04-02-2013, 04:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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pattimomma: I see what you're saying WRT only looking at temps for pegging O at CD16. One of the reasons I came to the conclusion of O on CD13 is that temp shift CD14 being at least the 2/10ths higher than my previous six temps, CD15 still sustaining, then a funky little fallback kind of thing happening CD16 then another rise CD17. B/c of the Peak Day Rule as well as that 2/10ths rule I figured I didn't O on CD16. My CF has always seemed to line up with my temps but in post-m/c land the hell if I know. If I did O CD16 I guess there's a possibility still but last BD before that was CD13 so shrug.gif . I know there's a chance but I won't hold my breath. If I am indeed only on 11DPO I will fall into a blackhole, ugh. I definitely prefer TCOYF hands down and those are the rules I go by. FF annoys me but I like comparing the info lol. What does "PC" stand for? Obsess away! lol.gif I'm so friggin' over this. Either Rose or a BFP needs to show. I'm aggravated as all hell...

planegreen: Hey, I'm here to kick you guys when you're down so NP ROTFLMAO.gif . Glad the numbers have been driven down even further! I hope temping gives you some clarity. It's just making me pissed off and moody lol. But I can't not do it b/c I neeeeeeeed/want the info eyesroll.gif . Do you want me to link your chart in the header?

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#21 of 172 Old 04-02-2013, 05:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ugh! Now I can't stop wondering if I did indeed O on CD16, with non of my usual secondaries, which would be a pretty late O for me. pattimomma, I don't remember reading in TCOYF about CF and temps not matching up but rather you likely O'd your Peak Day of CF or before in combo with the sustained temp shift. Where did you read that so I can investigate further if I can't stop obsessing about this (I'll consult Doc Google too but wanted to get your thoughts in the mix). I say again, ugh! Ya'll wouldn't believe how pissed I am right now irked.gif . CD11? AF not due 'til April 5?! Argh! F censored.gif that! banghead.gif

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#22 of 172 Old 04-02-2013, 06:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Looking at my p/p chart for this cycle and disregarding everything but temps, O would be pegged at CD17 with a classic fallback rise at CD19. In a previous cycle if I had disregarded everything but temps O would have also been put down as CD16 and that would have given me a nine day LP. Omg, this is stupid, I quit Cuss.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#23 of 172 Old 04-03-2013, 03:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Un-retiring for just a moment. I see I've had some cycle funkiness like this before where going by temps alone it looks like I O'd CD17. But I only had a nine day LP for that cycle. This particular cycle was also the cycle I was in the process of weaning/weaned DS1. Weaning DS2 now (think we're pretty much there).

Temp down today (woke up mouth-breathing around 4:30 so shrug.gif ; took my temp for the day around 5:30) which would be consistent with AF coming in soon. Another temp drop tomorrow should bring on AF by the end of the day...

Does it seem like I'm obsessing? Well hell yeah I'm obsessing! nut.gif Hoping to put a lid on this soon 'cause it's really wearing me out mecry.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#24 of 172 Old 04-03-2013, 10:27 AM
 
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planegreen It's great to hear that the numbers have come down! Maybe your body needed to get rid of a little something (hence the bleeding) in order for the numbers to come down shrug.gif I'll be interested to see how your chart looks this cycle.

 

mamacatsbaby I think the updated chart on FF looks correct. I will get out my TCOYF book when I get home from work and give you the page numbers for what I was referencing. Also your CF doesn't really look that off. In TCOYF it says that some women may experience a drying up of CF a day or two before ovulation. It's not really dried up it just appears to be. There are lots of example charts that show a CF pattern like yours, that appear to dry up before O. Maybe you were having short LPs and that's why it seemed like you were getting preg but it wasn't sticking. kellymom.com has some info that indicates that some women have trouble with implantation when they are breastfeeding. If you don't get a positive this cycle maybe you should try an OPK. I am trying one just to see how it matches up with what I record on my chart. Of course read in TCOYF how the OPK can be off too, false LH surges or the hormone not being high enough to detect on the kit but enough to cause you to O.  If Rose doesn't show up on Friday, I would test on Saturday morning. If it's negative and Rose still isn't there, I would keep temping and if temps are still up on Tuesday, I would retest as that would be 18 elevated temps and there should be plenty hCG present to get a positive.

 

PC refers to the type of computer I am using. TCOYF has 3 option - pen and paper, web version, and mac / pc version. I have the PC version on my desktop and I like that best. It gives as much control as pen and paper.
 


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#25 of 172 Old 04-03-2013, 03:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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pattimomma: Yeah, I really need to get around to kellymom and see what she says there WRT BF and implantation. On my CF pattern, see that's the thing, PD Rule and O seem to generally agree for me. This is a new development in my court if that's what's happening, brought on by who knows what. M/c? Nursing? Totally flipping my diet on its ass over the last year? All of the above?! shrug.gif . I wasn't playing when I said my body is suuuuuuuuper sensitive to hormonal crap. Maybe it's not new, maybe I'm just noticing it b/c of this TTC crap, ugh, WTFE...

As for OPK's, I don't think I want to mess with those, just too much going on for me to do all that. I do think that if we didn't catch the egg this cycle (I can't tune in one way or the other b/c I'm seriously out of balance right now, this insanity has me riding an emotional shitstorm) I will toss some PreSeed into the ring.

Oh! PC=personal computer, durh! duh.gif Yeeeeeeah, I need some serious relaxation time.

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#26 of 172 Old 04-03-2013, 04:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oh, and I forgot to say that yeah, I do still think that something was going on b/w fertilization and implantation. Ready to get off this train of nuttiness now *twitch*.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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#27 of 172 Old 04-04-2013, 07:56 AM
 
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Oh mamacatsbaby - I hope you either get AF or a BFP fast - you sound like you are making yourself crazy! Is every month like that for you? AFM - I've slowed to light/spotting so am thinking this really was AF! If so, YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

Me - 31, DH - 35, DD#1 redface.gif 11, DD#2 innocent.gif 5    TTC since 9/10    MC angel1.gif 2/11    MC angel1.gif 1/12

* * * * * * * 8 * * * 12 * * * 16 * * * 20 * * * 24 * * * * * 30 * * * 34 * * * * heartbeat.gif 40 EDD 3/10/14

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mamacatsbaby I believe you when you say your body is super sensitive! nod.gifIt makes perfect sense as to why your cycles would be different now. Sorry I didn't get a chance to get those page numbers for you last night but basically I read all the sections about wacky cycles dizzy.gif- coming off the pill, after a mc, after a birth, stress, so it's in there somewhere. I am using the clearblue easy digital OPK but I don't really like it. The rules for testing are too strict and it doesn't determine a personal LH baseline so it might not identify the surge. I am going to try First Response digital OPK next month. It has way more flexible rules and establishes a personal baseline so it will identify your personal surge. I don't mind using the OPK digital because it gives me a reason to POAS LOL!ROTFLMAO.gif Preseed sounds like a good idea. I still have hope for this cycle for you though. fingersx.gifTemps are still up. I got my youngest DD by DTD 5 days before O so 3 days before might be good for you. Are you having any AFaf.gif symptoms?

 

How's everybody else? Not much action on here lately. What is everybody doing to keep themselves occupied? whistling.gif

 

AFM - CD13 of first cycle off BC. Things are looking pretty typical for this cycle so I am hoping that my body is going back to normal. CTA is hard! DH and I used the withdrawal method for BC this morning.Sheepish.gif We were trying to abstain through the fertile period but it's too hard! I have been going to the chiropractor and trying to eat better and take my supplements. Now I just need to get started exercising.
 


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#29 of 172 Old 04-04-2013, 08:15 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by planegreen View Post

 AFM - I've slowed to light/spotting so am thinking this really was AF! If so, YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!

I hope so! Are you charting? I didn't see a chart for you on the first page.


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#30 of 172 Old 04-04-2013, 08:23 AM
 
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Any news from the Waiting to Know ladies? neg.gif pos.gif

zonapellucida
MommatoGray
angelbaby84
toothfairy2be

I can't properly stalk without a chart!

Any updates from the Waiting with Special Circumstances ladies? lurk.gif

WildDoula
MsBe
Serenyd

 


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