~'*'~ Hope, Healing, and Conceiving ~ May 2013 ~'*'~ - Mothering Forums

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Old 05-01-2013, 07:10 AM - Thread Starter
 
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~Continued from Hope, Healing, and Conceiving - March 2013~

This thread is for women who wish to conceive after a loss and need support, hope and healing. If you wish to be added to the thread or want to modify your info please make requests in bold. If you have a chart online either at TCOYF or at Fertility Friend and would like it linked with your name in the list, just post the link and add the icon in your post so I don’t miss anyone.

Bring on the babies!!



Waiting to O: 2whistle.gif


MsBe chartnew.gif
NSmomtobe chartnew.gif

Waiting to Know: pos.gif


MommatoGray chartnew.gif
planegreen chartnew.gif
pattimomma chartnew.gif

Oh Crap! I Don't Know What I'm Doing??!!?!??!?!? dizzy.gif

whistling.gif

Waiting with Special Circumstances lurk.gif


WildDoula
love_r4ks chartnew.gif
BetsyPage

Recent BFPs! rainbow1284.gif

May - leavesofgrass, JelloPanda chartnew.gif, Serenyd, toothfairy2be, mamacatsbaby chartnew.gif

April - duck.gif

March - unuselyriver, hippy mum chartnew.gif, 100%mom, lyterae chartnew.gif

February - Patience2013, Revolting, maszat85

January 2013 - SuzieSmiles, sarahl918

December - deborahbgkelly candle.gif, Thebyr, GraysMama, unuselyriver candle.gif

November - Porcelina candle.gif 17 weeks, J and J's Mommy



October - beingmommy, SweetMama34, Tenk, Oregon2010angel1.gif, maszat85angel1.gif



September - unuselyriverangel1.gifangel1.gifangel1.gif



August - Shell29 angel1.gif, RaineyDaye, Lisanne, BaileyB, patience2013angel1.gif



July - SilaMarila angel1.gif , writinglove, JelloPanda angel1.gif , Bena, thecoffeebean angel1.gif , patience2013 angel1.gif , BeagleSmuggler angel1.gif



June - writinglove angel1.gif , deportivo4, xerxella angel1.gifangel1.gif , Revolting angel1.gif , BetsyPage angel1.gif , CamoShades, jodieanneanton



May - AmBam angel1.gif , autumngrey, Adaline'sMama



April - stegenrae, Harmony96, beingmommy angel1.gif , thecoffeebean angel1.gif



March - confused.gif



In Our Thoughts: hug2.gif



ribbonpb.gif porcelina ribbonpb.gif 3/13
ribbonpb.gif BetsyPage ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif deborahbgkelly ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif unuselyriver ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif Oregon2010 ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif maszat85 ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif Shell29 ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif patience2013 ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif SilaMarila ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif JelloPanda ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif thecoffeebean ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif BeagleSmuggler ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif writinglove ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif xerxella ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif Revolting ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif AmBam ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif beingmommy ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif zonapellucida ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif angelbaby84 ribbonpb.gif 5/13
ribbonpb.gif BeagleSmuggler ribbonpb.gif 5/13


*In an effort to keep our header as up-to-date as possible, the threadkeeper reserves the right to move you to "In our thoughts" from "Waiting to O" and "Waiting to know" if you have not posted in this thread or in the previous thread. The threadkeeper may remove your name from the list if you have not posted to the thread within the previous three months. You are always welcome to rejoin the thread at any time.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 07:16 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So doing the c/p for this month's thread I just now noticed that I type-o'd the 'e' when I spelled "conceiving" last month in the title shake.gif . I seeeeeriously need more sleep! lol.gif

Ok, let me know if anything needs to be moved around ladies! Come oooooonnnnnn May! We need a spring time BFP bloomfest in this here thread dust.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 08:32 AM
 
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JelloPanda: It's hard to cut something (anything, really) out of your diet when you don't have something suitable to replace it with. I hope you find something you can use. The (slightly) good news is that you have the excuse give up the drinks you like gradually because cutting caffeine out cold turkey can lead to headaches.

 

mamacatsbaby: When are you planning to test? As for me, I have been following a vegetarian diet since my miscarriage because I watched some TED talks about the food system and decided that a vegetarian diet would be healthier for me and better for the environment and might even help me lose weight. But in reading about fertility diets, I have come to the conclusion that a vegetarian diet is not really the best for fertility. I think MommatoGray alluded to the fact that a vegan diet was not a good option for her fertility issues and various sources I have seen have pointed to the importance of certain nutrients that are highly concentrated in animal sources, especially animal fats. I was still eating eggs and dairy and trying to avoid the low fat dairy for that reason (animal fat seems to be good for fertility), but as you have pointed out many people have issues with dairy, and I wonder if I should be consuming it at all. That gets back to one of my original reasons for switching to veggie in the first place: most cows/chickens are fed such crap these days that the nutritional composition of the meat (and likely milk) can cause more harm than good. I don't believe the hormones and antibiotics are allowed in the system in Canada the way they are in the US, but still, I need to find a good source of grass-fed beef and free range chickens/eggs and consider whether dairy is helpful or harmful in my diet. The other thing I have come across in my fertility reading is a link between gluten intolerance and infertility, including miscarriage. I realized when I was evaluating my diet for weight loss that I eat a lot of bread and I am trying to cut back, but I am not sure whether I should go totally gluten free. I did for a couple days and didn't really notice a difference in how I feel overall. Plus, I have learned that in order to be tested for a gluten allergy you need to be consuming it regularly (since the blood test looks for a chemical produced in reaction to gluten), so I will eat it for now until I can have further testing done. My main concern lately has been my consistent weight gain, but I have always had some digestive issues (mostly gas), and it is possible that it is all connected.


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Old 05-01-2013, 10:39 AM
 
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NSmomtobe The comprehensive metabolic panel is a standard blood test given during a physical / check up. It looks at a lot of things including glucose, thyroid (tsh only but I would ask for the T3 and T4 as well), cholesterol and others. Often you need to be fasting for it so ask your doc about it before the appointment. 2cents.gif

 

mamacatsbaby since I am not actively TTC, I am living vicariously through you and your TWW! tomato.gif


 

Poor April with no BFPs!!!hammer.gif

 

AFM - I told DH that I am ready and he can just go for it when he is ready, LOL! He laughed and said that he was going to try and hold out for the rest of this cycle and next cycle, like we had originally discussed. Whenever I am getting close to O my body just tells my brain to go for it!winky.gif


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Old 05-01-2013, 11:13 AM - Thread Starter
 
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NSmom: Yeah, I think the underlying issue is our guts are pretty much jacked greensad.gif . Our food supply, even the organic stuff, is a wreck, we eat, sleep, breathe umpteen chemicals on a daily basis, the trends of what we've considered healthy change like underpants, we're always concentrating on our bodies and forget mind and spirit; these and many, many, many more reasons I believe are why we're screwing ourselves as a species and all the technology we can come up with will never trump nature, as hard as we may try and as stubborn as we are to admit it. Gluten is interesting. You know they actually started adding more gluten to the flour about, I want to say, sixty or so years ago (gotta check that again). Plus, we don't prep breads and things like we used to, it's all about "convenience" now. There are people with true gluten allergy (Celiac's) but I think most of us are "intolerant" to gluten 'cause our bodies don't know WTF to do with all that hard to digest protein and it's been tearing up our guts. Many people swear by raw milk and I sure wish that we could go there but we're not ready gut-wise I don't think. Who knows shrug.gif . It's supposed to help your gut but we, especially DS1, have serious issues with the stuff. I've heard the argument that it's the pasteurization that makes it a dead food thus upsetting the gut flora. We've got great raw milk sources here so hoping to try at some point. When, IDK. Maybe with both the gluten and the dairy you can wait until you have your testing done, get the results, and then try to go from there with whether or not you want to try to eliminate for a period. When I went grain-free the weight I'd been grappling with literally melted off. That was not my intention when I first pursued the course and boy was I surprised! And I loooooooooooooooove bread and pasta and cake, and cookies and, and, and; my whole family does. Know what's funny though? Once I gave up the grains, I didn't crave sugar anymore. So it's the grains/gluten I was addicted to when I thought it was a super bad sweet tooth. Now don't get me wrong, if it's some kind of special occasion or something I love me some sugah! yummy.gif But I don't have to have it like I used to. Boy, those withdrawals were a b censored.gif . The fat consumption helps to keep that stuff in check. I resisted going grain-free for such a long time b/c I had no idea how I was going to feed my family in any kind of affordable way.

Now, we are in no way, shape, or form low-carb, at all, and I've felt the best I ever have in my life. Nowadays, I can have some rice, or cornmeal/masa, or even a little improperly prepped gluten w/o ill-effect. But our diets are made up mostly of veggies, meats, fruit, and more fat than you can shake a stick at (ghee, coconut oil, lard (that I render, not that hydrogenated grocery store garbage), organic palm shortening. I cook just about everything that goes in our mouths from scratch (save some organic fries sometimes, since potatoes are so heavily sprayed, as cooking the way I have to, no choice, is truly exhausting, folks just don't know, even "real foodies"). We use chicken fat, eat the skin, consume bone broth ('though I've been a little more slack lately there), bacon fat, whole eggs (mostly DH, DS1 is highly, highly effing allergic mecry.gif ), full fat everything. For years I thought "low-fat" was supposed to be healthy. Well, not for us. Now, saying all this, I do think that it's important to fast and go raw for periods of time in order to give our systems a break; just go in cycles. That's just what I think is right for us though after all I've studied thus far. We're actually going veg probably a good portion of the summer. There's just no one way for us all. And I wish I could find truly pastured chickens that weren't $18 a pop greensad.gif . I have found good eggs for about $5 a dozen as opposed to $7 though and that's a win. I think we've been backed into a corner with everything, including food, and we're just doing the best we can to fight our way out. Lots and lots and lots, then a metric crapton more for good measure, of trial and error to figure out what works for you. We still haven't completely but we're a lot better off before than we were. What's that saying? One man's feast is another man's poison? Sooooooo true. Things that were supposed to help my DS1 took his system to places I don't ever want to visit again. The doctors don't know how to help, every "authority" on the matter has a different opinion. *sigh* It's really a lot to deal with and continuing to put one foot in front of the other, even when you don't know what's going on or how you're going to figure out what to feed yourself and your family since everything under the sun is seemingly horrid for you now, is really the only option.

Really, just keep reading and try, try, try again until you hit on something that works for you. Then rinse and repeat. It's a very frustrating process but oh so worth it. Have you read Nina Planck's Real Food? I still haven't gotten through it all (so busy and don't have the time to devour books in days like I used to) but I really like it. Also, check out stuff on traditional foods. I really think if we're eating as close to the original form of food as we can get, in general we're doing ok. Also, somebody recommended the video Genetic Roulette. It's really a lot to deal with so I just do what I can and let the rest go. It's interesting, the more we know, the weirder/more complicated things get.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 11:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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lol.gifpattimomma! Live away my dear! I'm burying my head in the sand privateeyes.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 11:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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NSmom: I went off on a food rant and forgot to answer your testing question lol.gif . I'm thinking about testing on the fourth since I'll more or less be about 16DPO by then if AF doesn't get me first. By then I should get a clear positive. Lalalalalalalalalalalalala, head in the saaaaaaaaaaaaaand...........

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 12:19 PM
 
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Hello! Happy May Day!

 

Still no period...AF was due yesterday, but I got another BFN. Who knows what is going in the old uterus? Definitely charting next cycle. Some friends gave maca and their OPKs since they are now pregnant--excited to try something new.

 

Mamacatsbaby-Loved the food post.  My Mayan Abdominal Massage practitioner told me to get on bone broths, raw milk, free range eggs and fermented cod liver oil because I am always so cold...I just can't do the bone broths, as we are principally vegetarian and have been for over a decade. We sometimes eat wild Alaskan salmon when we have the extra money...Maybe I should strive for it more often.  We have been doing organic milk and free range eggs for some time, but I am thinking of making the switch to raw. I have read that it is unsafe for pregnancy--what do you all think?

 

Thinking about you all!  Hope you are enjoying the beautiful day no matter what corner of the world you may be in!

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Old 05-01-2013, 12:42 PM
 
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Thank you for the thread mamacats and for your kind words of encouragement. I also love reading about your food choices, we seem similar in what we eat. Maybe my J and Ls are from making smiles on word?? I am crossing my fingers for a positive!!

 

NSmomtobe - Saw my doctor today thought I would share what she is testing for me. Glucose, DHEAS, estradiol (E2), FSH, LH, progesterone, prolactin and testosterone. And I agree with getting your T3, T4 and TSH. I just got them done last week because I get them regularly due to being hypothyroid. Sadly the thyroid is excellent, I was hoping for an easy fix...

 

AFM - I saw my doctor today and she was surprisingly helpful and ready to start investigating. She looked at all my chart and agreed that things look funny and not quite right. I don't know if it is the road I want to go down but she already mentioned clomid. When I got back in the car I could not help but be overcome with tears. I just cannot believe this happening. I want to be in denial and I want to be having my baby in three weeks like I was supposed to be. This is just way too hard sometimes!

 

Thanks to everyone on their thoughts on my chart smile.gif

 

I know I missed some things but to be honest I just cannot write much today, having one of those sad, sad days. Just can't handle it right now.

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Old 05-01-2013, 01:21 PM
 
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LeavesofGrass - From what I understand, the 'safety' issues with raw milk are only because of the factory farms we have producing milk these days, the overworked, improperly fed, sick cows give off milk that's scary if not "treated" somehow.

 http://www.realmilk.com/ explains it better than I can!  We do raw dairy when we can (otherwise we're dairy free), but it's hard to find due to the laws here.


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Early losses Jan/10 (7w), Aug/11 (5w), Jul/12 (5w)

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Old 05-01-2013, 01:48 PM
 
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Hi all!  Welcome to May! I am still waiting on AF.  I'm going to get some cheap dollar store tests on my way home tonight.  I won't be able to NOT test tomorrow morning if she's not here yet. :)

 

PS-The Ls and J result from using a different smiley face than this board or your device is programmed to. 


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Old 05-01-2013, 08:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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leavesofgrass: Yes! The fermented cod liver oil is great stuff I hear and I keep meaning to pick some up. DS2 definitely needs to get it in him as he hates fish of all types (taking after his dad in that respect lol.gif ) and won't eat the wild Alaskan salmon I buy. DS2 and I love seafood though. Unfortunately he can't do shellfish but the salmon is where it's at anyway so yay still smile.gif . I really wish the sun would stay out b/c we stay in it as much as we can when it is. We have a super awesome farmer's market near us that has superb prices for all kinds of food from all over the world and that's where we do most of our shopping (funny how the grocery store tends to only provide me with detergents, paper towels and other such non-edibles lol). Do you have anything like that near you? I know the canned stuff is awful with the chemicals but that's what we started with until I started making room in the old budget for the fresh/frozen at the market. Since you eat fish, as I understand it you can get good fish heads and such from Whole Foods at a good price (gotta get on it when they've got affordables lol.gif ); you could do fish stock which is excellent with the nutrition also. On the raw milk, JelloPanda put up a great link. Definitely look into it. Some people are comfortable with it during pregnancy, others aren't. Gotta find your zone!

MommatoGray: Oh darlin', I'm so sorry you're feeling so rotten. This is a really difficult place to be! So cry when you need to. I know I cry plenty. And getting closer to what would have been your EDD would definitely intensify all of what you're feeling. Take a long, hot bath maybe, cuddle up with a good movie you've been wanting to watch or a good book, maybe a glass of vino, or sit and do nothing at all but cry for a while. We're riding with you, with or w/o persies flowersforyou.gif .

planegreen: Oh good gravy and biscuits lady, thank you for clearing up the J's and L's thing! kiss.gif I really wanted to know 'cause I'm weird like that lol.gif . And I had to crack a smile at you not being able to resist testing tomorrow if AF hasn't shown. I imagined you saying to yourself "How can I not test if there's no AF? Pfffttt, that's crazy talk, not even an option!" lol Love it love.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 08:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So I'm leaning toward skipping my morning temp tomorrow. It's a rare day when we don't have to be up quite so early and I can't handle it if I see a temp plunge I don't think. I know it can happen even when you're pg which is why they say step away from the therm after you've got a BFP lol.gif . If I make it through tomorrow w/o AF calling I might resume the next day. IDK, maybe I should just stop now and hope for the best. I keep wondering which would be worse, the not knowing or the inevitable anxiety leading up to the deed coupled with the data from the deed itself, ugh! This has just been the longest two or three days hide.gif . Time to go watch more TV and read my book! whistling.gif

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-01-2013, 09:54 PM
 
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Just a quick question - has anyone heard of Vitex making one NOT get EWCM? I'm normally getting at least SOME cm by now in my cycle, and there's nothing.

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Early losses Jan/10 (7w), Aug/11 (5w), Jul/12 (5w)

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Old 05-02-2013, 08:47 AM
 
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Jellopanda-Thanks so much for the great raw milk link!  Regarding the Vitex, I have read about it causing the opposite effects (a few months ago, sadly I cannot remember the blog). When I was using it last month, it lengthened my cycle by 10 days and I think I ovulated twice. But I noticed a huge increase in CM. Now that I am off it this month to clear out the system, as my practitioners suggested, I've had almost no CM :( Do you feel (intuitively) like your lack of CM is Vitex related? I was told that often we have intuitive feelings about these things, and that we know! Trusting the body, woohoo! I hope your CM comes today or tomorrow--I am rooting for you.

 

Mommatogray- My thoughts go out to you and I am sending all of my love. You do deserve a nice, hot bubble bath and all things that make you feel wonderful. I am also crossing my fingers for you to receive your BFP:) 

 

Planegreen- If you did test this morning, I hope you got that positive!!! How exciting!

 

Mamacatsbaby- My partner works as the kitchen manager at our local co-op:) He is usually wonderful about bringing us home all sorts of yummy goodies, but as I am not teaching this summer, we are watching the pocketbook a little closer! However, I think you are right that I should urge him to bring home fish heads and bones (although another department packages and cleans the fish, I think he could ask for the "leftovers")--thanks for the idea! Also, about not temping--do what your heart tells you--I totally understand how you feel. I still haven't had AF either and I am struggling not to go test again...yesterday I didn't, but I sure wanted to.

 

I hope all of your wombs are feeling good:) And perhaps full!

 

xo

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Old 05-02-2013, 07:30 PM
 
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Hi all! 

 

mamacatsbaby - if you decide to stop temping I hope you can stop looking at your chart too!  winky.gif

 

leavesofgrass - still waiting!  I am crossing my fingers for you! 

 

AFM - I bought the tests on my way home yesterday and tested when I got home (yeah, no will power once I had the tests in hand...) It was a BFN and AF came this morning.  Surprisingly, I am not disappointed.  Instead I am actually happy that I had a successful and normal cycle.  Now next month I will probably be back to crying at a negative but this month I am totally okay with it.  You can move me back up to waiting to O. 


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Old 05-02-2013, 08:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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leavesofgrass: Think of me when you're making all those yummy chowders and such winky.gif .

planegreen: Still sorry she got you but I'm glad you're feeling good about your cycle. Moving you to Waiting to O thumb.gif . And ROTFLMAO.gif , so true about not looking at the chart! I think I've been pretty good about just walking away and not obsessing over the chart and temps so yay!

So yeah ladies, I decided to just stop temping and will test Saturday assuming AF keeps her distance. I've done my share of nail-biting and deep breaths today and found myself going to the bathroom a lot to see if I should start crying yet lol.gif . Still in it thus far praying.gif . It was definitely better for me to stop at this point. I'm still feeling anxious as I wait this out but, IDK, less so? The temping started really stressing me out. I've got to tell ya'll though, I'm scared out of my mind to test Saturday if I get that far hide.gif .

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Old 05-02-2013, 08:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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MommatoGray: I hope you're doing ok hug.gif . I see FF switched to dotted CH's on CD20 for you dust.gif .

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Old 05-03-2013, 06:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ahhh, so much time for me to end up in tears, lots and lots of tears gloomy.gif . Was about to go to bed last night, went to the loo and spotting mecry.gif . Didn't start 'til about one this morning. Hasn't gotten heavier but still, I don't want to hope greensad.gif . I had almost let myself start hoping this was it, just a little bit and then that. So then I started googling "breakthrough bleeding" and "implantation bleeding", staring at my incomplete chart like a zombie, and just feeling generally like bawling.gif . I was too tired to cry my eyes out at that point but I will, oh yes indeed, I will.

I didn't bleed at all with DS2 but I did with DS1. So I started looking through my DDC when I was pg with him and that made me laugh so hard and brought tears to my eyes. I was so happy then! It was a wonderful group full of so much love and support. There were those of us that didn't make it all the way through and those that were going through. I still think about the mama who did make it to the end but her baby was born sleeping. Gods, I remember feeling so helpless and just wanting to do anything I could to comfort her but knowing there wasn't a damn thing that was adequate. Overall, we had a wonderful time and that was such a beautiful, special time in my life happytears.gif . I still think about those ladies and the bonds we made. So perfect at that time.

I want to feel like that again. Why can't I feel like that again? greensad.gif I never thought it would be this hard, even with the history of m/c, birth trauma, birth loss, difficult pregnancy, difficulty in getting and staying pregnant, in my family. Why did I think I could/would escape it? B/c things were so straightforward with my first two? Starting to feel like what a mind f censored.gif that was. I was probably the happiest pg lady ever with the most uncomplicated pregnancies and the quickest, simplest labors. Am I being punished? Why? I'm a human being, I'm supposed to censored.gif up. If I really did some dark isht in a past life I truly don't remember. At least if I could remember then I'd know "Oh! That's why, I was an censored.gif hole! This makes sense! thumb.gif " Is it just my time to have this experience? My conscious mind says "F censored.gif this! I don't want this experience!" What my subconscious mind wants looks to be a totally different story and she and I are going to have to have a little talk, clarify a few things.

My children are growing so fast and I can't slow it down, not even a little bit. Time is slipping right through my f censored.gif fingers.

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Old 05-03-2013, 08:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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About five minutes after I posted right above, no joke, Rose came barreling through like a psychotic, out-of-control, demon train bawling.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-03-2013, 08:35 AM
 
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Originally Posted by mamacatsbaby View Post

About five minutes after I posted right above, no joke, Rose came barreling through like a psychotic, out-of-control, demon train bawling.gif .


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! angry.gif irked.gif greensad.gif 

 

WTF!!!! af.gif hopmad.gif

 

 

So sorry! hug2.gif hug.gif grouphug.gif


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Old 05-03-2013, 09:13 AM
 
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Oh mamacats! I have tears streaming because I cannot make this better for you. I am so so sorry. This is such a rollercoaster, I had spotting and I also tried to convince myself it was implantation. I think it is so hard when your hopes go up and than you are utterly disappointed again.

 

I don't know why this is happening, I don't have those answers. But, I do relate and we are all hear to listen and try to comfort. Life is really hard sometimes and this whole TTC stuff seems to make it unbearable. You are NOT being punished, I really believe this will happen for you Mama.

 

I send hugs and love and everything else that will bring you some comfort. Thinking of you hug2.gif

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Old 05-03-2013, 10:15 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you guys so much. I truly appreciate your support, just listening to me and understanding. Your kindness and the fact that you have to know what this feels like makes me cry. Thank you for being the amazing, strong women that you are.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-03-2013, 01:57 PM
 
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mamacats--sending you all my love, and all positive thoughts your way.  we are here for you! hope today brings you something lovely--you deserve it. 

<3

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Old 05-03-2013, 02:33 PM
 
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mamacatsbaby - CRAP! I'm so sorry. Your ranting is totally somewhere I have been before and I am right there with you in that my first two were a breeze and why the hell can't I get and stay pregnant now?? There are so many questions to ask of ourselves and unfortunately pretty much 0 of them make us feel any better. I am so sorry hun... (((HUGS)))

Me - 31, DH - 35, DD#1  11, DD#2  6     MC  2/11    MC  1/12 DS#1 3/14
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Old 05-03-2013, 03:41 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mamacatsbaby View Post

About five minutes after I posted right above, no joke, Rose came barreling through like a psychotic, out-of-control, demon train bawling.gif .

Oh mamacatsbaby, so hoping this was your cycle, I'm so sorryflowersforyou.gif! Grrrrrrrr, darn AF!! Sending big hugs your way hug2.gif. Please remember to be kind to yourself as much as you can namaste.gif, eat something yummy, do something fun, whatever gives you pleasurekiss.gif and sunshinecoolshine.gif. Lots of baby dustdust.gif en route to you for next time.blowkiss.gif


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Old 05-03-2013, 04:49 PM
 
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Although I was very sure I was out, I am positive now. AF reared her ugly head, no implantation for me, just a nasty kick in the behind.

 

Don't how much longer I can handle this. dizzy.gif

 

Still on my mind mamacats flowersforyou.gif

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Old 05-04-2013, 10:54 AM
 
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MommatoGrayhug2.gifbig hugs to you, sorry about AF:( Sending you goodvibes.gifgood vibes and dust.gifbaby dust to keep for when you need it:)

 

I know the waiting is disappointing, frustrating, painful, etc... Kisses blowkiss.gifto everyone else and sprinkling lots of dust.gifdust to everyone.grouphug.gif


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Old 05-04-2013, 06:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you lovely ladies all so much for the wonderfully uplifting and understanding energy you've been sending my way happytears.gif. It absolutely helped grouphug.gif .

leavesofgrass: I did get something lovely today, some much needed time with myself wink1.gif . And how are you doing? Did AF show yet?

planegreen: Yeah, it's weird, and it leaves you feeling very, very confused gloomy.gif . How is your world this Saturday?

Suzie: Hi there darlin', and how are things your way? Oh my goodness, 20 weeks already joy.gif . You know what I want right now? Some cheddar Pirate Booty lol.gif ; I've got a serious craving for that. I think some mac 'n cheese I had exacerbated the craving orngbiggrin.gif . Thanks so much for all the baby dust.gif . I'm stacking those suckers so I can get me a set of twins out of all of this lol.

Ugh, damnit, I'm sorry she got you too MommatoGray hug2.gif . I'm with you on not knowing how many more times I can do this. But then NTNP doesn't feel true to where I am either. I've been wanting another for about two years now. Cycle 6 for me now. I want to say this is cycle 6 for you as well? Moving you to Waiting to O hug.gif .

So, I'm realizing just how messed up my hormones truly are greensad.gif . I'm working out some things to do this cycle and over the next few months to try and get back in balance. I don't expect to conceive while I'm trying to fix all my whatever. Once I kind of have a comprehensive list of what I want to do I'll share it here and see what you guys think. Much love ladies and I hope you're doing something wonderful for yourselves today blowkiss.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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Old 05-04-2013, 06:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Nevermind, looks like I already moved you there MommatoGray. My poor brain nut.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

Me, DH, DS1, DS2, November 2012 brokenheart.gif, July 2013 brokenheart.gif, March 2014 brokenheart.gif

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