Hope, Healing and Conceiving ~ December 2013 ~ - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 182 Old 11-30-2013, 07:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Continued from Hope, Healing and Conceiving ~ November 2013 ~

This thread is for women who wish to conceive after a loss and need support, hope and healing. If you wish to be added to the thread or want to modify your info please make requests in bold. If you have a chart online either at TCOYF or at Fertility Friend and would like it linked with your name in the list, just post the link and add the icon in your post so I don’t miss anyone.

Bring on the babies!!



~ Waiting to O ~ 2whistle.gif

Harmony96 chartnew.gif
ilovemykiddos
Kaliakra
liladancing chartnew.gif
mamacatsbaby chartnew.gif
RainbowAsylum
rosie2727


~ Waiting to Know ~ pos.gif

.Right of Passage


~ Waiting to Adopt ~ adoptionheart-1.gif

MountainMamaGC


~ Oh Crumbs! I Don't Know What I'm Doing??!!?!??!?!? ~ nut.gif


~ Waiting with Special Circumstances ~ whistling.gif

jesepumpkin
NSmomtobe chartnew.gif



~ Recent BFPs! ~ rainbow1284.gif

December - .taichimom chartnew.gif

November - NSmomtobe chartnew.gif candle.gif, Arabelle candle.gif, piratemere

October - MommatoGray chartnew.gif, OSTC

September - eazar chartnew.gif, Jesepumpkin

August - Philothea, Anaralia

July - planegreen , Selissa, aloya, porcelina


~ In Our Thoughts ~ blowkiss.gif
(If you're in this group, we haven't heard from you in a while. Stop by and give us an update if you can.)

.dishescanwait
.Myjenny
.Verdakehawi

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

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#2 of 182 Old 11-30-2013, 07:58 PM
 
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Thank you Harmony!

December already? And I'll be 38 Monday? How the hell did this happen?!?!

Baby dust everyone! I pray that this is the month for everyone that truly desires it! Amen!
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Me , 38 years old; DH , 39 years old
DD - 11 , DD - 9 (both from previous marriage), and me and DH have DS - 4 .
07/04, 02/13, 10/13, 02/14,
05/14
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#3 of 182 Old 11-30-2013, 09:17 PM
 
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Hi everyone here in our lovely new thread. Thanks, Harmony!! You can delete my chart, as I deleted it. I am so sad, angry, and my earlier somewhat calm attitude has by now degenerated into "why me?" whining. I feel so despondent. I just want to have a baby.


First baby lost in September 2013.
Expecting our rainbow with our hearts wide open!
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 October 2014
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#4 of 182 Old 12-01-2013, 03:29 AM
 
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I'll join in the melancholy tiphat.gif . Woke up at 4:30 this morning, haven't been able to sleep since so just decided to get up. Had to pee soooo bad when I first woke up at 4:30 so went ahead and POAS, BFN of course. Cried and numbed out. Just laid there in the dark, staring at the wall, trying to go back to sleep for about two hours, shit didn't work. So pissed off, I mean so unbelievably pissed off. Feeling destroyed right now. My body won't fix, why won't it fix? Why?! My life has not gone like I wanted in so many ways. And now I can't even get pregnant, at all, really?! A basic human process. WTF is that? Supposedly our bodies are "made for this". Is that so now? Right now my body is a dysfunctional piece of crap, I hate this shit. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Ahhh, nothing like fresh tears to season up that shattered feeling thumb.gif .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

Me, DH, DS1, DS2, November 2012 brokenheart.gif, July 2013 brokenheart.gif, March 2014 brokenheart.gif

candle.gif Waiting on my SunshineBaby om.gif

 

  
 
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#5 of 182 Old 12-01-2013, 03:31 AM
 
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Thank you for the new thread Harmony. Not doing any hoping, healing, or conceiving ATM unfortunately...

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

Me, DH, DS1, DS2, November 2012 brokenheart.gif, July 2013 brokenheart.gif, March 2014 brokenheart.gif

candle.gif Waiting on my SunshineBaby om.gif

 

  
 
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#6 of 182 Old 12-01-2013, 11:01 AM
 
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mamacatsbaby, I am really sorry. That just plain sucks. Do you think that AF is going to show up? If so, I hope it won't add insult to injury and will be as painless as possible physically for you.


First baby lost in September 2013.
Expecting our rainbow with our hearts wide open!
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 October 2014
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#7 of 182 Old 12-01-2013, 02:50 PM
 
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hi all, 

arabelle, so sorry to hear about the bleeding. hope the process goes smoothly for you, over and done. hugs!! you can numb out for a while, that is totally allowed. its been years for me but i smoked weed a 2 times in the first 2 weeks after my last m/c just to get a break. or movies or a good book or whatever. glass of wine? oh and i started a few series on netflix, orange is the new black and the untied states of tara (now i have the urge to swear like a sailor).   you can process later. 

 

mamacatsbaby, hugs to you too. ugh despair is horrible. 

kaliakra sorry about AF. so your intuition was right, at least you know that. 

keep on breathing ladies, one step two step and keep going. 

 

rosie2727, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

 

AFM, i had a shit week but it wasn't because of me! i did okay, lol! my family were all in crisis mode for a variety of reasons, ER visits, criminal charges (rogue uncle), emotional breakdowns. YEESH! I had a very busy and stressful week at work but i got through it and did some excellent dr work! The big issue was my sister, her screening blood test came back as 1:6 risk for down syndrome, which is very high. She royally freaked out and told everyone in the family that she probably has a DS baby and got everyone all worked up. anyways, she had to decide between a harmony blood test, which is accurate but costs $850 or an amnio, which would give faster results but has a small risk of m/c and the needle into the amniotic sac! She choose the amnio and had it on friday. not my choice but so be it.  results will come tuesday afternoon so we are all waiting…..best is that she finds out the gender too! so far no complications but i was worried about her and the procedure. the harmony test looks great, very accurate without many false positives or negatives. I would get that next time although i hope it's covered by then. 

i have a massage tomorrow and see the counsellor for the first time on tuesday. i am just finishing a 21 day meditation challenge and it's been awesome. i took DH to a date night yoga and reciprocal thai massage event last night. awesome! great to spend some time together out of the house without kids. 

still no sign of a cycle, been a month now. i think AF will show up eventually as i skipped O. i bought some pregnancy tests online and i took one. we only did BD once without a condom but still i wanted to see a negative test for myself to confirm low hcg. POAS and watching it dry made me feel so anxious so i'm glad i'm not TTC for another month. i'm still working up my courage on that one. 

 

December, hopefully more hope healing and conceiving for all of us! lots of holiday fun and kid excitement to keep me occupied until 2014. 


Jese Mom to Elaina (April 2007) & Macy (June 2010). #3 m/c at 10 weeks (July 2013), #4 m/c at 9 weeks (october 2013). Expecting again! Due October 22/2014.
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#8 of 182 Old 12-01-2013, 05:07 PM
 
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Lost the ipod.  So I have to use the big computer since we don't have smartphones.  I am chalking it up to one more thing not going right.

 

Looks like I O.  I took a test last night and forgot to look at it and when I came back hours later it was dark as the control.  This am I took an OV test and there was no line.  So my positive OPK was on CD9.  I usually OV aund CD14 so I don't know what is going on.

 

We dtd CD8 and today (CD10).  Not sure if we should try for tomorrow too or if it is too late?

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#9 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 01:19 PM
 
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Thank you everyone for your kind words.
Please let me vent a moment and get this off my chest....
Things NOT to say when someone has experienced loss:
"It's God's will" (from the admitting nurse in the ER) really? Wtf??
"God always has a better plan" (from my single childless landlord)
"You just need to have faith"....in what???? Oh- right-- in that God who has a better plan!
"You're so strong- you'll get through this" oh, thanks, because I was thinking I would just lay down and die, but since you said THAT...
"God never closes a window without opening another" what- so I can jump out of it? And since when is "God" so trite? and had so much time on his hands that's he's out jackin around with my windows...
And my personal favorite: "The Lord works in mysterious ways" Pardon me, but this isn't a mystery and my intelligence is insulted by you diminishing my experience and trying to make it some mystical event so you feel more comfortable with it and can rationalize your faith.....
Ugh. I'll calm down a little. Sorry. I know people mean well, but I just can't take anymore. I have totally unraveled at this point and I don't even care....
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#10 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 01:51 PM
 
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arabelle: I hate how you are feeling. It sucks so bad. And there is nothing anyone can say to make it better. Only worse. You vent all you want. I totally understand. And if you want to fall apart/unravel, you are completely entitled to. If there was anything I could say or do to make you magically feel better I'd do it on a heartbeat. Life can feel like such bullshit sometimes. Next time someone says something that pisses you off, you should just tell them exactly what's on your mind. It might make you feel a tad better if just for a second. And it might teach them to keep their mouths shut. You should just say: "are you fucking serious!?" The look on their face would be priceless! Try to hang in there...

Me , 38 years old; DH , 39 years old
DD - 11 , DD - 9 (both from previous marriage), and me and DH have DS - 4 .
07/04, 02/13, 10/13, 02/14,
05/14
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#11 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 02:00 PM
 
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Thank you rosie...I just stared at one of the nurses who kept saying "it's not your fault honey" ok, well thanks-- but again- I'm an intelligent woman and I certainly don't have some naive guilt that I'm doing something to make my babies die.... Ugh
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#12 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 06:44 PM
 
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Hi. I am new to the group. I guess I must be waiting at this point. My last period was my first post partum one after my daughter, Madara died. http://www.fertilityfriend.com/m/home.php/liladancing

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#13 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 07:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome, Lila. ((hugs))

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

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#14 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 08:30 PM
 
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Hey I guess you did see my post last month! Well I got my period 16 days ago. In that time my husband had some serious complications (hemorrhaging) from a routine procedure and almost died. Well I brought him home after a lengthy stay at the hospital, and well we were very happy to be with each other, and very careless. So here I am again. I swear after this cycle, no more carelessness. Its so stressful, and I would rather just wait for the adoption, then have the stress of the TWW. Can I just say that the lovemaking after your SO almost dies is quite nice, because there was some moments where I thought I would never get to love him like that ever again. Anyway, hug your hubby's because life is so fragile. (As if we didnt already know that)

 

Welcome Lila. I am so sorry for your loss. Arabelle, I totally agree. That is some of the most insensitive crap anyone can throw at a person. 

 

ETA: For those that dont really know. I have had 7 losses at about 5 weeks since having my DD, and I have been on the waiting list for adoption since Nov 2012. 


Me(33), Mama to a crazy DD (6), Wife to a wonderful mountain man(32) BF my babe for 2 years.
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#15 of 182 Old 12-02-2013, 10:10 PM
 
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arabelle, it is surprising what others think will be helpful. At my u/s where they found the baby had stopped growing. the tech said as i was leaving 'don't blame yourself. i had one and the dr told me that 90% of the time it is due to the mans sperm'. uuuuuuhhhh, what? so i'm supposed to trade in my husband? gee thanks! also, NOT TRUE AT ALL! also, information from 30 years ago!

 

welcome Lila, sorry for your loss. 

 

So my twin sister got her amnio results back a day early, yes the baby has down syndrome. she and the whole family are beyond devastated. i just feel like my guts have been ripped out i am so sorry she has to deal with this. She has an appt with a genetic counsellor tomorrow. she is feeling like terminating because she doesn't feel able to cope with a special needs child that would need lots of dr's appts etc. I am so shocked at this! she is a teacher, a counsellor, and a very strong person. we have family that could help financially. i think that her oldest, who is 20 months, would love this little brother. i am an ND who would help with so many health concerns. oh how i am just wanting to protect my little unborn nephew but i can't. gah. i understand how afraid and overwhelmed she is and everything that is running through her mind. i will support whatever decision she feels is right for her. she is so horribly ill (hyperemesis) with pregnancy that she would not do it again. her husband is a great guy but not good at being supportive and they fought a lot after her first was born. I just feel sick about this. For me to have 2 m/c this year and then her to lose a baby too, ugh. She is 17/18 weeks and will need to make a decision soon. I have sent her a few articles/blogs and encouraged her to connect with some local families who could give her a better idea of the first few years and their challenges. 

i know this little boy will be full of love and i want to meet him. *crying* I didn't know but about 90-95% of down syndrome babies are terminated. 

seriously, WTF is up with life???? i offered to fly out there this weekend or whenever she needs it so i hope she takes me up on it. If she has the baby at least i can be there to help as i know how it feels to labour and deliver a baby that has passed. 

 

Due to this bizarre twist of events i have stopped thinking that fate is cruel for my baby dying and her being pregnant and have started being thankful that my body was able to prevent a pregnancy that wasn't chromosomal normal so that i wouldn't be in the same position. 

 

good thing i was already scheduled to start counselling tomorrow. 

 

thanks for listening ladies, i sure am glad that i joined this group. if you all have any resources that may be helpful for her, let me know. 


Jese Mom to Elaina (April 2007) & Macy (June 2010). #3 m/c at 10 weeks (July 2013), #4 m/c at 9 weeks (october 2013). Expecting again! Due October 22/2014.
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#16 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:05 AM - Thread Starter
 
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MountainMama, I'm sorry that you're in the stress of another 2WW. ((hugs)) But I'm so glad that your DH is okay! How scary that must have been. However this 2WW ends for you, I'd love you to stick around in the thread while you're waiting for adoption. I can even put you in a special category in the first post if you like. smile.gif

Jese, oh, man, my heart goes out to your sister. I'm praying so hard that she decides to keep your little nephew.

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

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#17 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:05 AM
 
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liladancing: welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss. You're in good company here. I pray you'll never have another loss.

jesepumpkin: Oh my! I just knew you were gonna say the baby was perfectly "normal". I couldn't imagine having to face that decision. I don't think I could do it either, but I see so many families with special needs children and it's obvious that the child is loved dearly. I was already scared with my age, but now I'm really scared! It's really got me thinking that maybe we should stop TTC. My head is spinning for your sister and the emotional turmoil she and all of your family is going through.

Me , 38 years old; DH , 39 years old
DD - 11 , DD - 9 (both from previous marriage), and me and DH have DS - 4 .
07/04, 02/13, 10/13, 02/14,
05/14
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#18 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:48 AM
 
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Jese, I hope that she makes the right choice for her family. I dont claim to know what that is, but Down Syndrome is a spectrum, and it can be severe. She also is considering her older child at this time and what taking care of a possibly severe special needs child would take away from him as well. If she does decide to terminate, just be there for her. I assure you its as deep a loss as any of us has been through. My heart goes out to your family. 

 

Harmony, thanks for your kindness. I would love to stick around. The adoption area can be a bit slow sometimes, with all the waiting. 

 

I really think that my body just will not accept a pregnancy. I have been on so many treatments for my autoimmune disease that, my immune system is just confused, and I think I have been sensitized some how to pregnancy, causing my body to attack shortly after implantation. Pretty sure I ovulated yesterday. Almost an entire week earlier than I usually do. Maybe the stress of our crisis brought that on. I dont know. 

 

ETA: I have been on vitex for 2 months now for heavy bleeding, so maybe that also had something to do with ovulating early. The vitex did make my last period a little lighter, but it was still pretty painful. 


Me(33), Mama to a crazy DD (6), Wife to a wonderful mountain man(32) BF my babe for 2 years.
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#19 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 08:16 AM
 
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I'm at the dr. They did another US. I don't want a D&C. Have any of you had cytotec for a miscarriage? What's or experience?
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#20 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 05:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arabelle View Post

I'm at the dr. They did another US. I don't want a D&C. Have any of you had cytotec for a miscarriage? What's or experience?
I have not. Sorry. I just wanted someone to respond! All of my losses happened naturally. I'm so glad I never had to have a D&C...

Me , 38 years old; DH , 39 years old
DD - 11 , DD - 9 (both from previous marriage), and me and DH have DS - 4 .
07/04, 02/13, 10/13, 02/14,
05/14
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#21 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:03 PM
 
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Arabelle, I had a D&C so I can't answer your question, but I am thinking about you. 


Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#22 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:08 PM
 
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Thanks rosie. My DDC responded. The dr I ended up seeing was really nice to me. It was a struggle getting an appt. we're not usually hospital or dr people so I didn't have anyone to turn to. They did another US and I had the disc from my US on Saturday. She said it looked much better already and that we didn't need to talk about D&C yet. She was really respectful of my noninvasive wishes. She prescribed methergine, but left it up to me to decide if I feel my body is handling it. I'm going to wait it out a couple days, the bleeding finally seems to be slowing down.
I'm really at rock bottom and I'm not really motivated to pull myself together.
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#23 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 06:16 PM
 
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And thanks NSmom. I hope you're doing ok.
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#24 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 08:54 PM
 
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Arabelle, I am so sorry. I have used cytotec for a m/c that just wouldn't complete- it was about 4 weeks after they established the loss, and my body just wouldn't kick into gear.  It worked fairly well for me, but I knew that the next option was surgical, and I was trying to avoid that.  It felt somehow less medical with the cytotec than a sterile field. Feeling in control helped me feel better about the whole thing- somehow, like I was clinging to one last shred of control.  I know it was an illusion, but it felt better to me. 



 

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#25 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 09:00 PM
 
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I am now very late, and still dealing with start white tests. I have no idea what is going on. I am holding off on going for any testing for a bit, but for now, I'm just trying to focus on whatever happens being ok. 

My husband will be home again in a couple days, but since my cycle has headed off to greener pastures, or maybe just headed off, we get to just have a good time and no stress of 'maybe this time will be THE time.'  I think it's a good thing.  Sad, but sometimes the TTC part takes away from the fun of having him home.  I am always trying to keep in mind that we really need to get in some bd-ing, instead of just relaxing and enjoying time together. 

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#26 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 09:18 PM
 
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arabelle, i haven't used the cytotec so i can't give you much advice. but if they rx that then they can prob rx some good pain meds.

 

 

my sister decided to terminate the pregnancy. Her and her husband met with the genetic counsellor and another dr today and decided. She gets the cervix dilation tomorrow and the D&C thursday. i have been crying rivers of tears over here, i am gutted. such a horrible position to be in to make that decision and i am grieving my little nephew. I had to tell the kids today and we all had a good cry. 

i am also reconsidering TTC and pregnancy and babies in general. if something is such a struggle then it can't be the right thing. I am doubting i will be ready to TTC for a while. i feel so confused. 

I did meet my counsellor today and it was great, mostly me talking & getting a lot off my chest. we are going to start EMDR treatments to deal with the trauma of the m/c. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_movement_desensitization_and_reprocessing

 

so does anyone want to share some good news and lighten it up around here?


Jese Mom to Elaina (April 2007) & Macy (June 2010). #3 m/c at 10 weeks (July 2013), #4 m/c at 9 weeks (october 2013). Expecting again! Due October 22/2014.
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#27 of 182 Old 12-03-2013, 09:28 PM
 
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Jese, I am so sorry for your sister and your family's loss. That sucks. I too have gone through the agonizing flip flopping of what the heck do I really want. It seems I have to re-evaluate every few months. 


Me(33), Mama to a crazy DD (6), Wife to a wonderful mountain man(32) BF my babe for 2 years.
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#28 of 182 Old 12-04-2013, 12:37 AM
 
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Hi friends,

I am really sorry to read all the sad, gut-wrenching stories. So much loss, and so little hope for us these days. I really, truly wish for us to get to a better place, and soon. Although grief has its own peculiar pace and can never be rushed...

AFM - I hid away the thermometer. I do not have any OPK that I am planning to use. This cycle, we'll just have sex whenever the mood strikes us, and reconnect, rekindle the dream for a firstborn, and try to take it easy. I am starting acupuncture for fertility on Thursday. I am really psyched for that appointment, as I have never done it. Will be back to the all too familar grind if pee on an OPK, wash, rinse, repeat, TWW, POAS, ad nauseum. Just need a break right now.


First baby lost in September 2013.
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#29 of 182 Old 12-04-2013, 05:37 AM
 
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Thanks Rainbowasylum. I feel today like I may be able to manage it without the rx.
Jesepumpkin I'm sorry for how painful this is. My heart aches for your sister as well- I can only imagine the "what ifs" she will struggle with for the rest of her life. When we got pregnant back in July I was pretty set on no diagnostic testing. I've never done it with my other pregnancies and I just had the attitude that you don't get to choose your baby, you take a risk when you make that choice and you take responsibility for it. I don't really feel that way now. Through the course of these back to back losses I've really given thought to the fragility of life. Over the last few years my career has brought me down a path that has created some pretty close relationships with individuals living with disabilities. Several of my students have chromosomal abnormalities and other birth defects. These are lovely human beings who brighten all of our lives and of course I'm sure they are glad that they weren't terminated before birth, but the truth is, they are suffering. And the older they get, the more they suffer. And a day will come when their parents are gone and they will left hoping there is someone to care for them. As a 43 year old woman, I'm starting to think that I'm being irresponsible and selfish by boasting of natural pregnancy without tests or intervention. That worked fine for the 4 beautiful healthy children I have- maybe it's time for me to realize how rare that is and let go of my principals- for the sake of another human being's quality of life. At 43 years old, it's most likely that any child I have now will outlive me. My older children are compassionate and would likely care for a disabled sibling--- but it is up to me to map that life for my children? They didn't choose for me to want another child. We borrow our children...and then they go live their own lives. One of my adult children already has a family and a life mapped out for himself--- and it's not a life that involves keeping the option open to care for a high needs disabled sibling when mom passes away. This is about more than a baby with special needs- that baby will become an adult. This all sounds so harsh as I write it, but I think my point is that I understand what you're saying about family who will care for that child and help out- but as a mother, is your sister maybe thinking "what about when I'm gone?" None of us want to think about what will happen to our children if something were to happen to us...but the reality is, in an ideal situation a child outlives it's parents, and that can be a scary reality for a mother with a child requiring special care. And aunts and uncles don't count- they will likely pass before the child as well. So we're back to counting on the other children we've had....and that to me feels like making an unfair choice for the future of my children. I still don't know what I'll do if I get pregnant again, but these thoughts are definitely weighing heavy in my mind these days. You and your family are in my thoughts and I hope you can find some peace and solace at some point. I am so so sorry that there is even a choice to make for your sister.
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#30 of 182 Old 12-04-2013, 06:48 AM
 
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Hi liladancing: I'm so very sorry for the loss of your Madara. I hope every day brings with it more healing for you and yours.

Arabelle: I hope the path you chose was the best decision for you. Keep us updated when you can. The thoughts running through your mind about the crazy isht people say were spot on and I had a laugh at your thought process as it was similar to the things I think when I hear stuff like that. I'm feeling extra froggy so I reeeeeeeally want somebody to say some nutty shit to me so I can give them an earful on how what they're saying is so far off the helpful course that it actually kicks down the door of WTF-ness. And I completely get what you're saying on how what worked for us with deciding to bring another child here in the past may not be what's going to work now. I didn't do much of the prenatal testing with my boys (a 20w u/s with each and some doppler here and there) but now the older I get and I realize this may not happen for a few years (I'll be 37 next year so my time is really not that long, especially with the issues I'm having), if it happens at all, has me rethinking what I will do.

jese: I'm so sorry about what has happened to your sister and your families; such devastation. You all are in my thoughts and I'm sending healing energy your way. I will light a candle for your nephew on Thursday and wish him good journey. Will have to check out that EMDR link. I haven't gotten to the place of being confused about whether I want to have another or not but can see where you're coming from.

Good on you and hubby for going with your flow RainbowAsylum.

MountainMama: I'm glad your husband is ok and the two of you have found a new space together. I hope your TWW isn't too stressful and you get the outcome you desire.

Kaliakra: Enjoy the break and have fun with the acupunture. Wish I could get in there 'cause I need it in the worst way but it's a little out of our budget right now. I am looking at self-accupressure though. Let us now how it goes.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips tea6.gif

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