"Advanced Maternal Age" Mammas... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 10:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Any of you still pg? How are you feeling? This is my 2nd pg during my "advanced maternal age" (almost my third because I was just 3 days away from being 35 with one of them). I have to say that this has been my hardest pg so far! I'm really feeling it!

And as if I don't already struggle with some "anxieties" over it, my mom has to keep reminding me of my age and how "worried" she is about me and hopes everythign goes okay. Wow, thanks for the vote of confidence mom and all the encouragement! I feel SOOOOO much better!

So how are you all doing?
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#2 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 10:54 AM
 
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Who drew that line in the sand, anyway?! I'm not quite 34, and seems like lots of folks think that's really old for a first baby. I can't help but wonder how my body would have handled this ten years ago, but really, I think I'm doing fine!
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#3 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 11:02 AM
 
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Not in your DDC, hope you don't mind me posting...
I definitely "felt" pregnancy more each decade. Thirties were harder than twenties, and well, forties was even harder!
When we decided to concieve #5 at age 40, my mother was horrified. All she could think about was how horrible it would be to have a child with downs syndrome?....or how hard it would be to get my body "back" at this age! I just don't share my reproductive plans with her anymore. She's from a different era, and honestly, just a bit ignorant and uneducated. She'll probably have a coronary when we get pregnant with #6!

me-45, DH-46, ds1-23, ds2-18, dd1-17, dd2-14, dd3-4....hoping for #6.....

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#4 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 01:07 PM
 
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I'm 39 and pregnant with ds2. Ds1 was born when I was 27. This pregnancy has been easier in some ways because I'm actually in better shape now than I was in my 20s (thanks to practicing yoga for 10.5 years). But I've definitely been more tired this go around...plus I'm anemic this time....and my asthma has flared up which didn't really happen with ds1.

This is definitely the last pregnancy for me. I don't think I could go through it again, even though it's a total blessing.

I think I'm feeling especially done with it today because I've been soooo sick this week with a cruddy cold and horrible cough.
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#5 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 01:10 PM
 
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I'm 35, just turned a couple of weeks ago and due with our first baby on the 24th. I'm fine. The 35 number is so arbitrary, and seems even more so when I was so close to the cut off.

A few in-law commented on my age before we even got pregnant, and I shut them down quickly. My mother was 35 when I was born - her 2nd - which was unheard of in the early 70's. She did just fine and swears to this day having children later keeps you young. I told them this, then start listing all I got accomplished before having children - aspects of my life that will enrich my child, travel, education, experience, work, etc.

It's just a number.

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#6 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 01:11 PM
 
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I was 24/25 with my first, 28/29 with my second, and 33/34 with this one. I had to laugh because early in the pregnancy I had all the symptoms of a tubal pregnancy and the MW sent me in for an ultrasound. The doctor who interpreted the results told me that since I would be 34 when the baby was born I was close enough to being "advanced maternal age" and gave me a sheet recommending tons of tests and procedures. I had to laugh- I guess like most things the line keeps slipping.

I do have to say that I have felt this pregnancy very differently than the previous two in my 20s. In my 20s I didn't feel how hard my body was working all the time. I have to hand it to mamas who are having babies in their late 30s and 40s because here in my mid 30s this pregnancy has just really taken it out of me.
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#7 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 01:16 PM
 
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My wonderful OB told me the first time I met with him that 35 is just an arbitrary age that was agreed upon in the medical community. He's never treated me any differently than he'd treat a younger mom-to-be, and I don't think he's ever even used the term "advanced maternal age." That's one of the reasons I've been soooo happy with him!

One of the other docs in the practice though....that's a different story. When I was newly pregnant this time she couldn't stop talking about my age, and the possibility that my "pelvis is too small to deliver vaginally," or that I really shouldn't try for a vbac because of the risk of rupture and/or because my pelvis is "unproven." It goes on and on. She's let up on a lot of that after seeing how well this pregnancy has gone. Thankfully, she's not my primary doc. and she did sign off on my VBAC birth plan. But, I have a feeling I'll end up with her when I go into labor.
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#8 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 01:51 PM
 
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I was 23 with my first, 27 with my 2nd and 37 with this baby. Yes, yes, yes...I have felt my age every day of this pregnancy. It has been, by far, the hardest.

As much as I love children, I pray this is the last time I will EVER go through pregnancy.
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#9 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 03:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Me too K&JsMaMa! Although I totally agree that "35" isn't too old to have children and is just an arbitrary age, I can say that I most certainly have felt the difference physically. My OB doesn't believe in the "advanced matermal age" thing either, but I sure feel it.

I had my first 2 in my low to mid 20's and then 10 years later had #3, #4, and now this one. I think part of the reason for the way I feel physically is because I've had these last three right in a row, before my body really had a chance to recover. That's probably more the issue with me than my age, although I know it plays a part! The difference between having babies in my 20's compared to my 30's has been quite noticeable!

This is my last one, too. At least my last pg (we may adopt down the line). I can't put my body throught this again. I'll be 39 in Nov.
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#10 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 06:46 PM
 
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I am still here too. My ob reminded me the other day that I am an "elderly grand multi" - lovely expression- but she doesn't see any real problems and has remarked that I could probably keep going until menopause - I don't think so!
I have certainly felt my age at times during this pregnancy, I seem to have failed every test I have been given (bad numbers on nuchal bloods, anaemic, "equivocal" amnio (which thankfully turned out to be fine), diabetes etc etc) and am glad to be in the home stretch now.
I am 36 weeks and don't think I will still be pregnant this time next week (37 weeks seems to be "term" for me, all my bubs wre born around then, and I am feeling things ramping up). Hoping for a lovely fast natural birth in hospital again.
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#11 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 06:57 PM
 
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I guess technically I fall into this now. I turned 35 at the beginning of January.

I've actually enjoyed this pregnancy more than my other 2 & am almost hoping I can somehow have another one. Might just be hormones though & I'll regain my senses at some point.

mom to all boys B: 08/01ribboncesarean.gif,  C: 07/05 uc.jpg, N: 03/09 uc.jpg, M: 01/12 uc.jpg and far too many lost onesintactlact.gifsaynovax.gif

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#12 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 07:32 PM
 
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I'm still here, also. Things are going well and I expect to be pregnant through the next month still.

: madrone - : SAHM to 12 y.o. DS, : 9 y.o. DD, and : 4 y.o. DS
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#13 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 08:57 PM
 
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Advanced maternal age, that's a laugh! : I really don't subscribe to that school of thought, and neither does my OB. My thought is: it ain't over til it's over, honey! We just had our fifth baby this month, and he is perfect in every way and I'm thrilled to pieces. Oh, I'm turning 42 this summer.

As far as how I felt, well, I gained waaay less weight this time and felt pretty fantastic as a result, except I had more problems with asthma this time around. (Which I attribute to the air pollution here, not my age.) Anyway, aside from the usual nausea, this pregnancy was probably easier than my others as I had more energy. Somehow, running out of energy with four little ones around was, umm, not an option, LOL. For me, I don't feel any "older" than with my other pregnancies. The only difference this time was that I worried more, because I had just had a m/c right before this pregnancy. So I was a little psycho the first half of the pregnancy, you know.

I'm hoping to have one more baby when this little guy is 2 or 3. Does getting pregnant become harder with age? Maybe! Maybe it will actually take us TWO months to conceive a baby someday....but so far, it hasn't. "Advanced maternal age" makes me laugh. I think you are going to have a fantastic body if you take care of it, period. (Obviously there are medical issues that come up though, whether related to pregnancy or not, for lots of people. Even when they take care of themselves.) I don't worry about birth defects or Downs or anything, because I figure, the hell with it, there are SO many things in life we don't control, and if it's not that, well, then, there could be something else down the road. I just don't want to worry about that stuff.

My grandmother had her fourth baby at 45. I've always thought of that, for myself, as kind of the time when I would like to be "done," but anything up until then is cool with me. And some people, I know they are still having babies at 48....my girlfriend just had twins at 48 (and has three other kids), and they are doing awesome. And she isn't even in that great shape, but they are still doing awesome. Anyway, I'm just blah blah blah....but it boils down to this:

Listen to your body and love your body and ignore everything and everyone else who is not supportive! I LOVE having babies and I think my body loves it too! Plus, it's great for reducing cancer risk, the whole breastfeeding part and even childbearing itself. You go girl!
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#14 of 20 Old 02-27-2009, 10:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by freestyler View Post
Advanced maternal age, that's a laugh! : I really don't subscribe to that school of thought, and neither does my OB. My thought is: it ain't over til it's over, honey! We just had our fifth baby this month, and he is perfect in every way and I'm thrilled to pieces. Oh, I'm turning 42 this summer.

As far as how I felt, well, I gained waaay less weight this time and felt pretty fantastic as a result, except I had more problems with asthma this time around. (Which I attribute to the air pollution here, not my age.) Anyway, aside from the usual nausea, this pregnancy was probably easier than my others as I had more energy. Somehow, running out of energy with four little ones around was, umm, not an option, LOL. For me, I don't feel any "older" than with my other pregnancies. The only difference this time was that I worried more, because I had just had a m/c right before this pregnancy. So I was a little psycho the first half of the pregnancy, you know.

I'm hoping to have one more baby when this little guy is 2 or 3. Does getting pregnant become harder with age? Maybe! Maybe it will actually take us TWO months to conceive a baby someday....but so far, it hasn't. "Advanced maternal age" makes me laugh. I think you are going to have a fantastic body if you take care of it, period. (Obviously there are medical issues that come up though, whether related to pregnancy or not, for lots of people. Even when they take care of themselves.) I don't worry about birth defects or Downs or anything, because I figure, the hell with it, there are SO many things in life we don't control, and if it's not that, well, then, there could be something else down the road. I just don't want to worry about that stuff.

My grandmother had her fourth baby at 45. I've always thought of that, for myself, as kind of the time when I would like to be "done," but anything up until then is cool with me. And some people, I know they are still having babies at 48....my girlfriend just had twins at 48 (and has three other kids), and they are doing awesome. And she isn't even in that great shape, but they are still doing awesome. Anyway, I'm just blah blah blah....but it boils down to this:

Listen to your body and love your body and ignore everything and everyone else who is not supportive! I LOVE having babies and I think my body loves it too! Plus, it's great for reducing cancer risk, the whole breastfeeding part and even childbearing itself. You go girl!
Good for you Freestyler! I think that's awesome.
Wish I could be where you are, but these three in a row have really thrown my body for a loop! I do truly believe that some bodies carry babies with ease and some don't (regardless of the shape you are in or how you take care of your body).

Interesting to read the different views and different ways mammas are feeling!

I do just want to clarify that I only titled this "advanced maternal age" not because I believe it, but because I specifically wanted to hear from women 35or over and I used that term tongue in cheek.
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#15 of 20 Old 02-28-2009, 11:18 AM
 
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I just turned 38 and am due later march and this pregnancy is definately less enjoyable than my 1st. I am sure my age is a factor, but I am also supposed to be having a girl-- and the constant indigestion and on and off nausea has really made it unpleasant. I am on Diclectin, but at 37 weeks still can't get off the darn stuff.
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#16 of 20 Old 02-28-2009, 12:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I just turned 38 and am due later march and this pregnancy is definately less enjoyable than my 1st. I am sure my age is a factor, but I am also supposed to be having a girl-- and the constant indigestion and on and off nausea has really made it unpleasant. I am on Diclectin, but at 37 weeks still can't get off the darn stuff.
Oh wow, nausea througout the entire pregnancy would be horrible.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with that! I bet for that reason alone you are ready to be done! You'll feel like a new woman!
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#17 of 20 Old 02-28-2009, 07:19 PM
 
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Yeh, I suppose there are people who pregnancy is easier or harder for than others. I guess I have "easy" pregnancies, I feel great and just LOVE IT. I'm always sad when pregnancy is over. It's the births that are a total nightmare from hell, and always have been. Doulas, no drugs....and I get: stuck babies stuck babies stuck babies or whatever, ick.

Speaking of advanced maternal age: Right now I need a nap. This afternoon I'm feeling every minute of my 41 years. Stayed up too dang late last night. Dumb.
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#18 of 20 Old 02-28-2009, 10:19 PM
 
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OK all you youngsters. I'm 43 and about 12 days from my due date. I've felt great the whole pregnancy, just real tired and sleepy at this point. I'm anxious to meet this new little person!
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#19 of 20 Old 03-02-2009, 10:08 AM
 
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I haven't posted in forever but was happy to see this thread! I'm 41 and expecting #3 around April 1. This baby was a big surprise for us and my husband and I were initially very worried about my age. So far though everything has been completely fine, no better nor worse than my pregnancies in my early 30's.
I have been pretty tired but that may have more to do with working FT and them coming home and dealing with homework and getting kids to their many after school activites.

My ob honestly seems more concerned about the fact that I tend to have large babies rather than my age. I think I am being more closely monitored because of age but everything has been absolutely fine.

It's great to see so many other "old" moms!
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#20 of 20 Old 03-03-2009, 11:46 PM
 
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I was 32 with DS1 and am now 35 - but my husband is 51, and THAT makes this one different. Somehow, we live in each other's worlds in a way, as partners, and he is "feeling" older, even though healthy- I think the decade number makes a difference for him, and being "almost" 50 and "over" 50 : well, let's just say, this will be our last one.
As for me, I LOVE being pregnant, and have felt good- though tired, etc (see multiple complaint posts ) I don't feel of advanced age, and my midwives have never mentioned it - though the OB nurse did mention testing, which I declined.
If it were feasible, I would love to keep having children (I dream of a girl ), but it isn't just my decision. The 'old' guy is worth it!
~jenn
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