I need to prepare mentally.. - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 03:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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how do you do this?

I feel like I am struggling with this right now. i am due any day now and I have realized that I'm finding myself scared of birth. And, I don't want to be! I am scared for the pain, scared of failing.

I spent some time yesterday asking the Lord for strength, peace.

What can I do? I want to feel relaxed and in control for my birth. Not scared or worried. How do you ladies do this to prepare yourself?

Maybe I should try visualizing? Doing some meditation? Writing some things out?

I feel like * maybe* that's why I haven't gone into labor yet ( although Im not overdue) Maybe my body and mind is waiting for me to relax and FEEL in control and ready mentally.

I don't know, maybe that's crazy talk!
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#2 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 03:27 PM
 
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I don't know if this will help you or not, but I'm in labor going on nearly 40 hours now... this has been unlike anything I imagined it would be. If you want to follow the story, I've been posting here http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1048740

I'm learning a lot.. I'm just ready to meet my baby now. I hope things progress for you quickly as soon as your baby is ready.
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#3 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 03:42 PM
 
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I don't know if you've read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin? Regardless of where or how you are planning to give birth, I think it is a tremendously empowering book and everyone I've recommended it to LOVED it.

Your body was designed to do this and YOU CAN DO IT!

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#4 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 04:38 PM
 
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Maybe repeating some birth affirmations would help you.

My body is made to do this. I will surrender to nature. I am trusting my body and my baby to work together. My cervix will open as I relax. I am surrounded with love and respect. My baby will find its perfect position. I accept all of myself and all of my feelings. I am comfortable and I am listening to my body's signals. Let go. Let it happen. I am ready to birth this baby. I will meet my baby soon.

Add any that help you focus on these types of ideas...

Good luck mama!!!

Already!?!?! cold.gif  ~ Lori, doula, childbirth educator, wife to Jermaine 6/04, and mom to two happy and energetic boys - Tatum 6/06 and Keegan 3/09

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#5 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 08:16 PM
 
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I pray like crazy. That's #1. You also need to think positive thoughts, and avoid reading or listening to anything negative or scary. Keep telling yourself that you are strong and you can do this. God made your body to birth babies and women have been doing this successfully since the beginnning of time. Speak positive words and think positive thoughts. And keep thinking of holding and nursing your baby after all is said and done.

It's normal to feel a little anxious. You will be just fine mamma.
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#6 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 08:41 PM
 
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Really understanding the birth process and knowing what would happen helped me a lot the first time around - understanding what my body would be going through. I did read about potential problems in order to be prepared but I mostly mean just knowing what happens in each stage of labor, etc.
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#7 of 15 Old 03-01-2009, 10:51 PM
 
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I have found that pregnancy/birth affirmations help me a lot. Sometimes when I get anxious about things that could possibly go wrong I turn on a track of pregnancy affirmations and it pretty much makes my worry go away. Hope you can find something that works for you.
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#8 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 01:03 AM
 
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I like to visualize the birth. It helps that I have previous births to remember, that you may not, where I know I have never met any pain I can't handle. I have even had a painless labor as well as an extremely painful pit induced one I got through without an epi. You never know what your experience might be! Just know that as soon as baby is out, you will totally forget about what pain you might have felt and you have a rush of love for your baby. It is a one of a kind experience.

~Lanie mom to Layne, Liam, Maren, Meridian, and Melora
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#9 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 03:55 AM
 
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If you haven't read it, get a copy of Birthing from Within - there's a great section there on opening up your mind and freeing yourself from fear. It totally helped me.
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#10 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 03:57 AM
 
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I totally understand! I have been through this once and am scared it won't be any better, though everyone tells me the 2nd come much faster. But I don't want to expect that. I'm still not sure how to relax myself because I have a hard time relaxing when I feel so stressed about other stuff going on in my life. I need the last week of this pregnancy to get ready and I think that he knows that and yours will come when it's the right time and even if it's not what you expect, it will be okay! You and your baby will come through it healthier and stronger!

~RG Natural Babies Free Shipping on several items and orders over $60!  BumGenius, Tiny Tush, Rumparooz, RMD, Rockin Green & more!  We have all your diapering needs!
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#11 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 07:15 AM
 
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I don't know what to tell you, I'm just so dang uncomfortable that I want the baby on the OUTSIDE just so I can have some physical comfort for once......However, I am not enjoying the labor wait, because my water didn't break with DD, and I'm not sure if it will with this one. My worry? I don't want to have to clean up a water break mess. I kid you not, that's my hang up :
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#12 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 07:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lizzie9984 View Post
I don't know what to tell you, I'm just so dang uncomfortable that I want the baby on the OUTSIDE just so I can have some physical comfort for once......However, I am not enjoying the labor wait, because my water didn't break with DD, and I'm not sure if it will with this one. My worry? I don't want to have to clean up a water break mess. I kid you not, that's my hang up :
ha! how much was it?
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#13 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 07:21 AM
 
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Originally Posted by dearmama22 View Post
ha! how much was it?
?

If you're referring to labor, I said "labor wait" as in, I'm still waiting for it
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#14 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 07:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Lizzie9984 View Post
?

If you're referring to labor, I said "labor wait" as in, I'm still waiting for it
oh, ha! I meant how much water broke for you the first time?

I hope things get moving for you soon!!
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#15 of 15 Old 03-02-2009, 07:48 AM
 
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Originally Posted by dearmama22 View Post
oh, ha! I meant how much water broke for you the first time?

I hope things get moving for you soon!!
None, my water never broke. I was 8cm and 80% effaced when I got to the hospital, and I had a C. Long not-willing-to-share-yet reason involved in it being a repeat C, but suffice to say it was necessary due to active UR, and to repair the damage from an ill-performed emergency C a few years earlier.
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