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Planned hospital birther's thread

4K views 101 replies 24 participants last post by  HotJabanero 
#1 ·
This came from another thread I had posted and someone suggested having a hospital birther's thread.

Feel free to post those hospital questions or just talking about hospital births in general here.
 
#2 ·
Great idea! I know we had a homebirth one but never even thought out a seperate thread for us. I was just going over my info as to what I need to buy or search for at home to put in my hospital bag. I have a hefty list...though last time around it happened so fast that I didn't end up bringing half the stuff and didn't use most of what I brought...so we'll see.

I'm still a bit worried about how things will go with getting care for DD when I go into the hospital and also if she's awake during laboring at home. My mom unfortunatly isn't appearing to be as reliable as I had hoped as she hesitated and made excuses for not coming late one night when I was going to have to go into the hospital for fluids. It makes me sooo sad...
This was one thing I didn't think I had to worry about!

Anyway, I'm really hoping the nurses at this hospital are accomodating to my birth plan, and nice about it. It's hard for me to go to a new hospital when I had such a wonderful experience with DDs birth. Great nurses. My midwives have assured me that they make all the decisions and that having my doula there too will allow it to be more accomodated. So should go well. Anyone else concerned?

ETA: Murph...I read your other post and I'm surprised hospitals have rules like doing an IV and pitocin routinly...both hospitals we've been at it is up the the midwife/OB. If I am group b strep pos. then I will have a hep lock otherwise no need for it. As for pitocin, I did get it last time due to the placenta not coming out and the bleeding..I'm really hoping to avoid that this time, but it is up to my midwife, not the hospital. Gald you feel comfortable in with your tour. We toured the hospital when I went up to labor/delivery when I fell on the ice... they looked like good rooms and I've asked all the necessary questions to the Midwives as when I did ask the nurse a question while there about monitering she said "oh you have to have the strips on the entire time" I freaked and my midwife assured me that the practicioner makes those decisions and to remember the nurses here don't see many natural births so they say what they know... and not to worry my midwives signed off on my birth plan.
 
#3 ·
Thanks for starting us a thread.
As far as packing, last time my water broke 2 weeks early and labor was slow to start, so I had all day to pack. I ended up taking an entire suitcase full of clothes and items! Barely used any of it. I can't even begin to think about what I'll truly and really need this time. I'm busy trying to think of a dress or something to wear to labor in, don't really want to wear hospital property gowns.
 
#4 ·
I'm SO with you on not wearing the hospital gowns!!! Dh laughed at me when I said the gowns made me look horrible in all the pictures afterwards. I looked so frumpy and everything. He's like, uhm you just gave birth. Just because I just gave birth doesn't mean I want to look like poo.

I was virtually naked when laboring and could have cared less!
 
#5 ·
Thank you for starting this thread. I have already packed my bags. I know I'm probably taking too much but am like you guys I won't wear hospital gowns and I would much prefer to use all my own stuff if possible.

I feel really anxious as to how it's going to work out as I am a really private person. My biggest problem is the midwives practice has 15 midwives and it's luck of the draw who you get. So I've been doing all my prenatals with one midwife so I'm at least not stressed meeting new people at prenatals.

I want my kids there but considering how ugly things get bleeding wise after birth, think enought blood to soak chucks and drip off of a bed, I'm second guessing myself. My dh was deeply troubled by two of my births, the bleeding part that is, and I don't want my kids to think that is normal because it's not. But they really want to see the birth. I guess I could have them removed immediately by someone who can stay calm so as not to scare them. WWYD?

Honestly I'm afraid of the staff afraid of having to stand up for myself and my wishes for the baby afraid of hostility because of my previous homebirths. I really need to get over that because everyone I have met thus far takes it in stride and are very supportive of my wishes.

shinelikethesun: How frustrating for your mom to get flakey this close to birth. I feel lucky my MIL is a rock for last minute babysitting.
 
#6 ·
hotj: how old are your kids? It would vary a lot on what to do with them with the heavy bleeding depending on their ages. Also, have they seen/dealt with blood ever?

I'm afraid of having to stand up for my wishes as well. Last place i gave birth on the tour they said one thing, but it was different when the time came.
 
#7 ·
We are also having a planned hospital birth


I delivered at a regular hospital with Elle and Meadow (same one for both) but this time I am delivering at a womans hospital in downtown Chicago. We are going to be taking a tour in the next few weeks (we should have done this weeks ago
) and Elle is going to go on a special "Tike Hike".

I am not really wanting to go past my due date since I am already measuring a week ahead but we'll see as we get closer. I am thinking that if I do make it to my due date and my cervix is favorable I will ask to have my membranes stripped. I was induced with Pitocin with Elle because my BP was high and that was not at all fun but with Meadow they stripped my membranes and a few hours later I went into active labor after a week of constant and intense false labor. The actual labor was a much more pleasant experience and the contractions were tolerable since they were not drug induced like with Elle


Amy
 
#8 ·
Planned hospital birth here, too! I'm a VBAC this time and have a doula to help me labor at home as long as possible and help me in the hospital/keep us informed to what's going on and remind us of what we want!

Something she said is a great thing to do is to go by the nurse's desk on the way in and say in a humorous way, "We're having a natural birth and VBAC. If you have a nurse wanting to do a natural VBAC, here we are!"

I thought that was a great way to weed out any that really don't want to.
 
#9 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by mrsbass View Post
Something she said is a great thing to do is to go by the nurse's desk on the way in and say in a humorous way, "We're having a natural birth and VBAC. If you have a nurse wanting to do a natural VBAC, here we are!"

I thought that was a great way to weed out any that really don't want to.

I love this!!! Might use it minus the VBAC stuff!

And as for hospital gowns...well the moment I stepped into my birthing suit last time I stripped down to nothing. I didn't want ANYTHING on me. No modesty for my birth and my midwife, doula, DH, nurses didn't seem to care...it wouldn't have mattered as I was in my own zone and didn't care what others thought. I warned my midwives and doula that I'll most likely be the same way this time. I did wear the hospital gown and my robe after birth and till I went home...I actually liked the ease of letting my gown down to nurse and not having pants to deal with. To each their own!

Those who are worried about standing their ground at the hospital...have you discussed this with your midwives? I know mine said that they make the decisions so not to worry about that as they have signed off on my birth plan and since I have a doula, most the nurses won't bother us anyway as what would they do? Do any of you have a doula...may help ease that concern. I'm in a practice of 5 midwives (I couldn't believe the one who has 15, that would be hard!) so I wanted to be sure I knew of one for sure professinonal person who was going to be with me from start to finish and DH feels so much more comfortable knowning that she'll help him to know what to do too.
 
#10 ·
I'm a hospital birther too, much to my chagrin. I started out with a homebirth midwife but something didn't feel right about it so I canceled her before I even had an appt. Luckily, I knew of a great CNM to switch to and I couldn't be happier with her! She is highly recommended by all the doulas I know in this area and I got to attend a birth with her during the short time I worked as a doula so I've seen her in action and know that she is great! I here you guys on no hospital gown!! I wore it like a good little patient with DS and felt naked and inhibited the entire time. I hated it and I know it affected my labor by how it made me feel so I'm not even going near it this time! lol I'm a little nervous about dealing with the nurses as well, but hopefully my midwife will get to the hospital at the same time as me so she can help run interference.
 
#11 ·
HI all! Another hospital birth here. My births were so long ago, I don't remember much, but I don't remember being upset. My ds was VBAC and no one said anything, although I tend to go very fast and was already 10 when I got to the hospital...had them all scrambling...lol I don't remember anyone pushing anything on me with dd either, though it was almost 15 years ago. I am not a strong person about speaking what I want when I feel intimidated, but dh has no inhibitions, so I am counting on him! I have the baby's stuff ready to go, and started packing my bag today. Will finish all but the toiletries tonight, and be ready, but I am expecting to go in the next 3 weeks, so we'll see. I am taking only an outfit to come home in, and probably some PJ's though I don't remember being awfully bothered by the hospital gown before. I also packed slippers and robe, so I can move about as I wish. This is the same hospital as before and they were very free about my moving with dd, so I don't expect much trouble, as in my thinking surely they have gotten more used to natural birth rather than gone the other way. I fully expect this to be all natural and fast, I hope I am not disappointed.
 
#12 ·
Another planned hospital birther here. I've already got my packing list ready and will start putting stuff into the bags and install the carseat at the end of the month. We've even got a few plans for my older 2 kids, have hired a doula, and, if necessary, will get a hotel room near the hospital for dh and dc if I'm laboring overnight. I got a jar which I'm stashing change in for the vending machines in the labor and delivery so dh can get the kids stuff if our sitters back out. My last two were pretty fast, so I don't expect to be there long.

Although, I do plan to use the hospital gown only so I'm not messing up my own stuff--but as soon as I know I'm leaving (or the next morning if I'll be leaving that day, most likely, I'll just put regular clothes on after my shower...)
 
#13 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Murph12334 View Post
hotj: how old are your kids? It would vary a lot on what to do with them with the heavy bleeding depending on their ages. Also, have they seen/dealt with blood ever?

I'm afraid of having to stand up for my wishes as well. Last place i gave birth on the tour they said one thing, but it was different when the time came.
The oldest two are 8 and 9 they're okay with blood I'm just worried about the rush and panic of the adults rubbing off onto the kids. I want them to see and remember birth as normal and non scary. I'm going to have to really think on this.

I am really hoping our hospital really practises what it preaches. Our tour guide was this funny old man(70ish) who seemed to really love the atmosphere and really loved the midwives. When it came time to show us the medical equipment in the room he made sure to point out the midwives never used the stuff only the OB's. That was pretty comforting.

I'm hoping to get to use the water birthing room. It was huge and the tub was really impressive.
 
#14 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by nancy11 View Post
<-- hospital birth expected

I might wear the stupid gown underneath my personal football jersey (my name and number).


That would be awsome you should totally do that. I would love to see a picture. That would be a fun addition to a baby book.
 
#16 ·
<-- hospital birth expected

I'll be making a packing list soon, and already talked about "policies" with my OB. She recommended a birthing plan (which I was already going to do) and they promote rooming-in and won't bug me about meds if I tell them not to. The only thing that bugs me is the potential "time limit" if I'm not progressing. I don't know what the limit is yet, but that ceoncept makes me anxious.

That in mind, I hope to go to the hospital as late as possible (roughly 20 minute drive) but, this being my first time, I hope I can figure out when that is.


I might wear the stupid gown underneath my personal football jersey (my name and number).
 
#17 ·
I am having my fourth hospital birth, although it will be at at new hospital because we moved since the last one. My problem with my last two births is that as soon as I got to the hospital, my labor completely stopped. BUT, both times I was 8cm when I got there, so they didn't want to send me home. So I ended up getting pitocin and delivered with about 30 minutes of labor.

So this time it is heavily on my mind(which is why I am up at 6am
), that I do not want to wait too long, since I dialate so much before labor, but I don't want to go too early and have my labor stop again! My new doctor and hospital are much more natural than the last, so I am hoping that they will help me with other options to bring on that last bit of labor.
I adore reading spiritual midwifery while preparing for childbirth, so I am wondering if my labor really ends because I subconciously want to be delivering in the back of a van


My 10yo daughter has already packed my bag for me, I really have to take a peak and see what she decided I need! First time moms- bring your favorite maternity outfit to wear home, you'll be comfortable and happy at how loose it is instead of bringing a regular outfit and feeling tight and disappointed at your still-there tummy
 
#18 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by HotJabanero View Post
The oldest two are 8 and 9 they're okay with blood I'm just worried about the rush and panic of the adults rubbing off onto the kids. I want them to see and remember birth as normal and non scary. I'm going to have to really think on this.
With that age I would just talk to them beforehand about the possibility of it happening so that they are aware and it's not something surprising if it does happen.
 
#19 ·
I think I would prefer just having it in the car. So many things would be easier than dealing with hospital staff, as no matter how nice they are -- they're strangers. I thought about that happening, too: labor slowing down while en route. I think I'll just bring some garage tools and be ready to deal with it. Then maybe it won't stop. I kindof have that concern, as well.
 
#22 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by HotJabanero View Post
How long is everyone planning on staying in the hospital?

Barring complications my midwife said we can check out 6 hrs later. I'm thinking if I birth before noon I will take them up on that. If later then I'll wait for the morning after.
The midwives/OBs will release the mom as soon as they feel she is ready, but the pediatricians won't release the baby until 48 hours for first time moms and 24 for "experienced" moms. So, we can expect to spend at least one night, if not two depending on when little bit is born.

ETA: I wonder how long it'll be before some mom-to-be who plans to homebirth comes in and says: "Why not homebirth?" My answer: "For reasons that do not concern you."
 
#23 ·
hospital said 24 hours is stay required by them, 48 is positive for that one test i can't think of the name for.

I totally don't mind because I'll give me time to bond with the baby without dh and dd around.
 
#24 ·
For those feeling afraid of hospital staff: have a conversation with your DH about what's important to you and what you do not want anyone trying to change or talk you into (assuming all is well/baby is healthy/etc). I was worried for my first birth as well and prepped DH with what I wanted to have happen and that I didn't want them trying to talk me into doing something I didn't want to do nor convincing DH of it either. He asked that I write it down so he'd have a cheat sheet. We didn't end up needing it as everything went as we hoped, but it was good to just know that someone would stand up for me if I couldn't do it myself during labor/delivery.

And keep in mind, it's your birth and your baby. You make the decisions, not hospital policy or routines. And if you rub some nurse the wrong way because you're wanting to do things differently . . . so what? She's not coming home with you. You won't likely see her again. You need to advocate for yourself and your baby.

Hospital policies/routines are for the convenience of the staff, not necessarily for the best of every mom and baby. The staff is there to help you and take good care of you and your baby . . . I'm not suggesting they're not. But so much is done for staff convenience rather than individual patient needs.
 
#26 ·
I liked staying at the hospital last time. It was like a hotel only they brought food to you (good food too). The nurses rarley came in and never at night and baby roomed in with us so it was like a mini vaca where we didn't have the pressure of doing anything around the house, just caring for our baby and me healing. Now with that said, I may want to get home sooner this time to have DD home with me. We'll see.

I've also been told if you don't like your nurses you can always ask for another and they will send in a different one. My dad did this a few times when he went through his cancer...some personalities just don't match.
 
#27 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by ShineliketheSon View Post
I've also been told if you don't like your nurses you can always ask for another and they will send in a different one.
I'm more likely to have a nurse asking for a different patient!


I think they are "requiring" me to stay two nights there... but if everything goes really, really smoothly, I think I would essentially make my exit before that. We'll see how that goes. I had one ER experience there for my D&C in 2007, and it was pretty non-confrontational (although the attending doctor was a weirdo and he's all looking up my skirt so-to-speak - meh). Of course, that was a very quick procedure and I was outta there that day.
 
#28 ·
I am having a planned hospital birth too. It makes me feel the most comfortable. I really like our hospital. We went on a tour a couple of weeks ago. The rooms are really nice. The hospital policy requires you to stay 48 hours for a vaginal birth, but I am ok with that. I probably have packed way more than I need, but I'd rather have more than I need of my own stuff than not enough, kwim? The baby is allowed to stay with me (and DH is too) the whole time and this was one of my concerns so I'm happy about that. They do weigh the babies every night but I can just take him myself to the nursery (or DH can) and then bring him right back to my room.

My fear is that I am going to end up having a C-section. I discussed this with my doctor and it sounds like their "policy" is to do a C-section more quickly than I'd like. I completely understand that if I'm pushing for over 2 hours and not making any progress than that might indicate that something is wrong with the baby's position or my pelvis and that it might not happen, but I am going to do everything in my power (and I'm going to make sure DH is on board too) to make sure I exhaust all options SAFELY before letting it get to that. Obviously, if the baby or myself are in distress of any sort I understand that it might need to happen.

My other concern is that I'd like to labor at home for as long as possible (the teacher who gave us the tour said its better to stay home as well). The hospital is literally a 7 minute ride door to door so I have that going for me. If my water breaks at home, how soon should I go in? I know I have a good amount of amniotic fluid (high end of normal) and I have to worry about cord prolapse - does anyone know anything about this? My doctor hasn't even discussed this with me yet, but I have heard that having increased fluid can cause this if/when your water breaks. If I'm just having contractions and my water has not broken, what signs do I need to look for that would tell me its time to go in??

TIA!!
 
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