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Old 03-24-2009, 06:32 PM
 
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YAY for boney bums!!! The little guy's head is down and all else looks fine.

I ate a chocolate bar today Honestly, I can count the number of whole chocolate bars I've eaten in my life with my fingers. I don't do that. Who is this monster I've become?? lol

shineliketheson... I'm glad your dh was good about the pics. We're doing ours sometime this week, but by ourselves. We'll set up the timer on our camera and I'm draping a black sheet behind us and we'll all wear white shirts and jeans. I'm getting my hair cut (yay!!!!) on friday, so maybe after that.
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Old 03-24-2009, 06:50 PM
 
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YAY for boney bums!!! The little guy's head is down and all else looks fine.
:

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I ate a chocolate bar today Honestly, I can count the number of whole chocolate bars I've eaten in my life with my fingers. I don't do that. Who is this monster I've become?? lol
I think, if we all joined hands...every single one of us...there would not be enough hands in our ddc to count the number of times in my life I have eaten a chocolate bar. Which reminds me that I have been waaaay too good today. Hmm...

Mama to one little blur, watching everything move too fast. Eden 4/10/2009.
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Old 03-24-2009, 06:52 PM
 
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I think, if we all joined hands...every single one of us...there would not be enough hands in our ddc to count the number of times in my life I have eaten a chocolate bar. Which reminds me that I have been waaaay too good today. Hmm...
:

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Old 03-24-2009, 06:58 PM
 
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I don't know how any of you are built but if you were thin to begin with that 50 lbs probably isn't much...now with me, I was 185 before DD and gained 25 lbs...I looked HUGE! The weight went everywhere, belly, hips, face... This time I weigh alot less and have gained less than 20 so far (but mostly due to the morningsickness for the first 5 months, which I would have traded for wieghing more!). But I feel like it's all in my belly this time so I"m hoping it'll be easier to loose or at least I won't still look pregnant when baby is out! Every body is so different...
Yes, I was thin.
118 >> 163+
And the weight was initially all belly, but now it's in all the places you listed.
That's how I can guess how much I'm gonna have to deal with later.
I'm sure I shouldn't care, but I haven't been a different adult weight -ever.
I guess I'm just a bit miffed by this whole process. I was really set in my ways and comfortable with myself.

Eh whatever. I'm being a baby instead of just having one.

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Old 03-24-2009, 08:21 PM
 
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Yes, I was thin.
118 >> 163+
And the weight was initially all belly, but now it's in all the places you listed.
That's how I can guess how much I'm gonna have to deal with later.
I'm sure I shouldn't care, but I haven't been a different adult weight -ever.
I guess I'm just a bit miffed by this whole process. I was really set in my ways and comfortable with myself.

Eh whatever. I'm being a baby instead of just having one.
I remember 118...5th grade was a good year.

Mama to one little blur, watching everything move too fast. Eden 4/10/2009.
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:27 PM
 
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I remember 118...5th grade was a good year.

That's what I was just thinking! I think it was the year right before I got my period... then all heck broke loose
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:35 PM
 
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HA HA Kate I was thinking the same thing...it was grade school when I last weighed 118!!!

However Nancy, I feel you too...6 years ago I weighed 200 pounds, and lost 65 pounds and kept it off until this pregnancy (fluctuating 5-10 or so anyway) I am nervous about my body after this pregnancy, I am proud of the weight loss, and I will be there again after this one, it is just scary to think about sometimes...

and today I went to OB. Baby sounds good, still measuring 2 weeks behind (37 weeks tomorrow, woo hoo) but since it's growing, they aren't concerned! I am dilated to 2 cm but not effaced at all. So ok with that. didn't gain any weight again, which I am ok with!

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Old 03-24-2009, 08:39 PM
 
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But fyi the top part about the shower must be about someone else, since this is baby 2 my friends/family don't believe in doing showers.
Sorry! I got you confused with Lindsay! That's what I get for not using the multiquote function to keep everyone straight.

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So....my sister...she is doing much better. She is home and taking over responsiblities with the kids again. This, however, is causing tension with my younger sis (21) who is living with them now to help. The younger sis at first didn't like how the older one was handling things with the kids so then she basically gave up and started going back to her old ways of doing NOTHING. She's applied for a job so hopefully being out of the house for a while will help them both adjust better. The older sis actually calls me once a week to see how I"m doing and is genuinely interested...she hasn't done this is years! So thanks so much for asking!
I'm glad to hear that it sounds like she is finally doing better ! That must be a huge weight off your shoulders-- or, at least, less weight.
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:41 PM
 
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OH! And GBS negative!!!!

mama to dd16, ds13, and dd1 born 4/1/09 :
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Old 03-24-2009, 08:50 PM
 
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I'm a petite (or was) 5'3" and have an athletic build.
I played a ton of sports through my 20's and just basically stopped eating and got into computer stuff. I still play softball every summer and ski a little in the winter, but the past 9 months? Fooood!

My best friend is like, "This is so cool! You eat now!" :-/

GBS test tomorrow. Bleh.

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Old 03-24-2009, 08:58 PM
 
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Yay Lilgreen and goodmomma76!!!!

Nancy it definitely sounded like you AND baby needed the weight. I'm sure it will come off pretty easily since it sounds like you are naturally athletic.

I'm 5'1.5 and 120 is my ideal weight but I haven't weighed that much in a few years, sigh.

Married to my best friend Mama to DS1 4/2009 and DS2 3/2011 and two Remembering 3/2008
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Old 03-24-2009, 09:39 PM
 
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OH! And GBS negative!!!!
Yeah!!!!

Good luck on yours Nancy!!!

I guess I"m not worried about the weight as I weigh less preggo now than I did before preggo with DD. This is our last babe and so I'm looking forward to getting into an exercise routine and keeping the weight off. I know have to excercise for energy to keep up with 2!!!!

Mischievium:Yes it is a huge weight off me and the rest of my family that my sis is doing better. It was always on my mind and now I can focus on baby! And no worries about the mix up...I can't figure out how to do the multiple quote thing!
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Old 03-25-2009, 01:14 AM
 
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Yeah!!!!

Good luck on yours Nancy!!!

I guess I"m not worried about the weight as I weigh less preggo now than I did before preggo with DD. This is our last babe and so I'm looking forward to getting into an exercise routine and keeping the weight off. I know have to excercise for energy to keep up with 2!!!!

Mischievium:Yes it is a huge weight off me and the rest of my family that my sis is doing better. It was always on my mind and now I can focus on baby! And no worries about the mix up...I can't figure out how to do the multiple quote thing!
I just learned yesterday...and I've been here awhile....there's a little button in the lower right hand corner of all the posts that has a piece of paper w/a quote mark over it...you just click those on all the ones you want to quote.

Mama to one little blur, watching everything move too fast. Eden 4/10/2009.
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Old 03-25-2009, 02:11 AM
 
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Nancy11, all my thin mom friends went right back to being thin, even if they gained 40lbs+. It just "nursed off" and "melted away". I mean- okay, they CLAIMED they looked different than before, but seriously, they have the body shape I had early in puberty! Me, I gained 28 pounds and I only lost 8 of it (and my baby was 8lbs6oz, so, um, it really didn't make sense). This time I've only gained 15 so far but I'm not holding my breath that this will mean I am any thinner later. Sigh.

I think post-baby your normal metabolism will dominate again. If you tend to be small and thin, then I predict you will be again (might be a few months, but thats normal). Meanwhile, if you tend to put on weight when stressed, like me (probably really good adaptive feature of a paleolithic momma, or for my viking ancestors, right?), then- well, lets just say, I can exclusively nurse a gigantic 90th percentile super-active boy for 8 months, keep nursing him until he is 2 years old, eat a healthy home-cooked vegetarian diet, exercise several times a week, and still be overweight. I have an efficient body- I'd survive fine in an ice age or whatever.

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Old 03-25-2009, 02:19 AM
 
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Yeah!!!!
I can't figure out how to do the multiple quote thing!
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I just learned yesterday...and I've been here awhile....there's a little button in the lower right hand corner of all the posts that has a piece of paper w/a quote mark over it...you just click those on all the ones you want to quote.
oooooohhhhh! I like that feature!!!
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Old 03-25-2009, 03:15 AM
 
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I have an efficient body- I'd survive fine in an ice age or whatever.
Heh. I hear ya, guys. My biggest challenge after I stopped worrying about the baby's health has been overcoming my fears of never returning to the happy life I had. The idea, here, was to make it even happier -- but never having been through this and really having no close friends with children has made this process very difficult.

That and plotting and planning for this one child until age 38 (gasp) has put a lot of pressure on. The anticipation of the unknown is making me insane.

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Old 03-25-2009, 03:55 AM
 
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Nancy, your kid will retrain you, they are really good at that! It might seem like the unknown to you- but they sure let you know whats up right away.

dissertating mom to three

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Old 03-25-2009, 04:36 AM
 
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YAY for boney bums!!! The little guy's head is down and all else looks fine.

I ate a chocolate bar today Honestly, I can count the number of whole chocolate bars I've eaten in my life with my fingers. I don't do that. Who is this monster I've become?? lol
Yay for upside-down babies!!! And at the chocolate bar. Do you never eat them just because you find them too rich or out of self-discipline? Either way, now's the time to indulge!

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I have an efficient body- I'd survive fine in an ice age or whatever.
I'd be right there with you .

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oooooohhhhh! I like that feature!!!
Watch out, it's addictive ! But it really does help keep people straight when you're responding to long threads-- even if you just multiquote them and then erase their quotes once you've written a response.

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Heh. I hear ya, guys. My biggest challenge after I stopped worrying about the baby's health has been overcoming my fears of never returning to the happy life I had. The idea, here, was to make it even happier -- but never having been through this and really having no close friends with children has made this process very difficult.

That and plotting and planning for this one child until age 38 (gasp) has put a lot of pressure on. The anticipation of the unknown is making me insane.
Well, virtually everyone I know says it's both the most difficult and worthwhile thing they've ever done (the having kids thing). AND a lot of people go back for seconds or more, so that's encouraging. But, you're right, the anticipating change without knowing exactly what that change will be is crazymaking :.

Totally random, but The Last Starfighter is on HBO right now and I'm enjoying some sweet, sweet 80s computer generated graphics .
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Old 03-25-2009, 06:48 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My biggest challenge after I stopped worrying about the baby's health has been overcoming my fears of never returning to the happy life I had.
Well, I really don't think you ever go back to the life you had...but that doesn't mean you can't be happy or happier. It's like moving to another planet, really, when you become a parent. Planet Parent. It's a completely different society with different cultural norms, and the natives are not like anyone you've ever dealt with before!

Sometimes Jason and I look at childless couples and all of their freedom, and say, "When you don't have kids, it's like being on vacation all the time - and you don't even know it!!!" But having children is fantastic in a way that just can't be translated.

Mischeivium, I loved that movie when I was a kid!

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh - insomnia again. I'm so sick of it.

Ever-evolving mama to my beautiful Brynn, and my little dimple-face Noah .
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Old 03-25-2009, 08:15 AM
 
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Ladies- I must say I am a little jealous of your weight gain you know for sure you've grown healthy babes and have kept yourselves fed to. I am at 0 lbs- no longer in the -s but also no gain at all. And no I was not THAT much overweight before pg.Not sure of actual lbage, but I am 5'3" and wore a size 14 pants-I have a big chest (DD) and no butt.

The whole weight thing has been my biggest stressor this whole time- even over GD! According to US this lo is about 7 lbs 10 oz at 36 +3 days, of course that is give or take a lb! All my ohter kids were nice size too- 8lbs 13oz biggest at 41+wks and the smallest was 5lbs 12oz at 34wks- the 38 wkers were 7 lbs 12oz. So roughly they all weighed the sameish.

37 wks today- fullterm! Let's go baby!:
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Old 03-25-2009, 09:25 AM
 
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Well, I really don't think you ever go back to the life you had...but that doesn't mean you can't be happy or happier. It's like moving to another planet, really, when you become a parent. Planet Parent. It's a completely different society with different cultural norms, and the natives are not like anyone you've ever dealt with before!
This is my big problem, mentally.

I want to integrate the baby into my life, not rotate my life around the baby. THis, as well as for other reasons, is why I'm only having one! We'll see what happens -- I'm not a typical person and don't expect to be a typical "mom."

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Old 03-25-2009, 10:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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This is my big problem, mentally. I want to integrate the baby into my life, not rotate my life around the baby.
Do you *really* want to try to make it work that way, or you just saying "in an ideal world..." ? Because, not to burst your bubble, but that is just not a realistic expectation, especially with a newborn. I think that women who go into parenthood expecting that things will not change are much more likely to be prone to PPD than those who are mentally prepared for their whole world to be turned upside-down for at least a few months.

Ever-evolving mama to my beautiful Brynn, and my little dimple-face Noah .
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Old 03-25-2009, 11:39 AM
 
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This is my big problem, mentally.

I want to integrate the baby into my life, not rotate my life around the baby. THis, as well as for other reasons, is why I'm only having one! We'll see what happens -- I'm not a typical person and don't expect to be a typical "mom."
It's good that you're thinking (and realistically worried) about it all now. My big "freak out" at the end of my last pregnancy was the realization that I'd spent 30-something weeks imagining having a baby, but suddenly was struck and totally freaked out by the idea that I was going to be someone's mother.

And I hated all of the people telling me how incredibly different/horrible/sleep deprived/whatever my life was going to be. My secret mantra was "look at all of the really stupid people I know that have had babies and not messed it up too badly".

I think and know that it is possible to have a baby and not have your life totally revolve around the baby. And you and your partner can find ways of integrating baby into your life in many respects, but things will also change (especially in the first couple of weeks, where it feels like all baby, all the time) But hardcore baby-training, abandonment or adoption aside, I don't think it's possible to have life go on as usual with a new baby. You'll still play baseball, but might spend less time in the pub with the team afterwards. I went to the book launch last night, but didn't stay up til 3 at the afterparty.

I work as a community health nurse and do home visits with postpartum families. I see the range of reactions and adjustments to new parenthood, and it's hard for everyone. I very recently had a client who was similar to you- in her late thirties, never spent much time around babies, and freaked out by the lifestyle change. Except unlike you she hadn't even considered how major it would be until *after* the baby was already there. So you're ahead of the game by thinking about things already.

Even though you're not the typical mom, I would suggest finding a "mommy group" or some "mommy friends". Try scoping them out a little ahead of time, to find someone that is similar enough- you don't need to hang out with the "I love my life and my baby and it's the centre of my universe" crowd. But it's really important to have someone who can relate to the "holy cr@p look at how my life is right now with this baby".

And know that especially in the first couple of weeks that "I have made a terrible mistake!" feeling is common. (Or perhaps in your case, and at times in mine- this starts in pregnancy).

This is a long rambling post intended as a little cheerleading. Please just ignore it if it's totally unhelpful, Nancy...

"Guess what? It's a magical world. And when I sing, my songs are in it."
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Old 03-25-2009, 11:42 AM
 
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Oh, I forgot the rest of what I was going to post... but it's sounds like everyone is/was doing pretty well. I hope your husband is healthy soon, Shine.

I had my midwife appointment mixed up on my calendar, so had a call when I didn't show up yesterday. I rushed over, but it was just a very quick check in instead of the usual chatty appointment. And I'm GBS negative!

"Guess what? It's a magical world. And when I sing, my songs are in it."
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Old 03-25-2009, 11:46 AM
 
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It's good that you're thinking (and realistically worried) about it all now. My big "freak out" at the end of my last pregnancy was the realization that I'd spent 30-something weeks imagining having a baby, but suddenly was struck and totally freaked out by the idea that I was going to be someone's mother.

And I hated all of the people telling me how incredibly different/horrible/sleep deprived/whatever my life was going to be. My secret mantra was "look at all of the really stupid people I know that have had babies and not messed it up too badly".

I think and know that it is possible to have a baby and not have your life totally revolve around the baby. And you and your partner can find ways of integrating baby into your life in many respects, but things will also change (especially in the first couple of weeks, where it feels like all baby, all the time) But hardcore baby-training, abandonment or adoption aside, I don't think it's possible to have life go on as usual with a new baby. You'll still play baseball, but might spend less time in the pub with the team afterwards. I went to the book launch last night, but didn't stay up til 3 at the afterparty.

I work as a community health nurse and do home visits with postpartum families. I see the range of reactions and adjustments to new parenthood, and it's hard for everyone. I very recently had a client who was similar to you- in her late thirties, never spent much time around babies, and freaked out by the lifestyle change. Except unlike you she hadn't even considered how major it would be until *after* the baby was already there. So you're ahead of the game by thinking about things already.

Even though you're not the typical mom, I would suggest finding a "mommy group" or some "mommy friends". Try scoping them out a little ahead of time, to find someone that is similar enough- you don't need to hang out with the "I love my life and my baby and it's the centre of my universe" crowd. But it's really important to have someone who can relate to the "holy cr@p look at how my life is right now with this baby".

And know that especially in the first couple of weeks that "I have made a terrible mistake!" feeling is common. (Or perhaps in your case, and at times in mine- this starts in pregnancy).

This is a long rambling post intended as a little cheerleading. Please just ignore it if it's totally unhelpful, Nancy...
:

I think that was all very well put Mel!!!! I'm a first time Mom and there are times I am PLAIN OLD SCARED at how different life will be. I know it will be different in a good way and we will love this child more than we could have ever imagined, but its scary nonetheless. I especially like that you wrote Nancy is ahead of the game by worrying about it now because that is so true. I think we all know that our lives will change, but as you said, after the intial "initiation" time (for lack of a better word) I think it is perfectly reasonable to carry on with activities you did pre-baby. Just think Nancy - now you will have a little cheerleader watching your games and I'm sure he/she will be your NUMBER ONE fan .

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Old 03-25-2009, 11:48 AM
 
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I have things to do today and I'm hiding out on the computer

Weight gain, I gained the most with #1, 60+lbs and that was the easiest weight to take off. I didn't loose all of it but I started pg lower than my normal weight. I ended up being pretty close to where I was normally

This pg I had HG and I'm only +3

mum to Christopher (6/98) Elizabeth (2/05) twins Aaron and Dominic (7/10/06) and new baby Eden (4-18-09)
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Old 03-25-2009, 11:48 AM
 
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Ladies- I must say I am a little jealous of your weight gain you know for sure you've grown healthy babes and have kept yourselves fed to.

37 wks today- fullterm! Let's go baby!:
I knew someone would come on with the other side of the weight thing...I was nervous in the beginning bout not gaining weight but once I was over ms I was able to gain enough. It's amazing how our bodies can do what they need to do despite outside influnences. Congrats on fullterm!!! Go baby go!!!!

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Well, I really don't think you ever go back to the life you had...but that doesn't mean you can't be happy or happier. It's like moving to another planet, really, when you become a parent. Planet Parent. It's a completely different society with different cultural norms, and the natives are not like anyone you've ever dealt with before!

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh - insomnia again. I'm so sick of it.
I love the palent parent! Anyway, my life is soooo much better with children. I can't imagine it without. For me I can't understand how some would actually choose not to have any children...what would life be for, living for yourself? But I know to each their own! I'm much happier being a mom than I would be traveling the world! Sorry about the insomnia! That is so hard for your days!

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Originally Posted by wobblykate View Post
I just learned yesterday...and I've been here awhile....there's a little button in the lower right hand corner of all the posts that has a piece of paper w/a quote mark over it...you just click those on all the ones you want to quote.
Thanks Kate! this is so much easier than going back to remmeber how to spell someones name!!!
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Old 03-25-2009, 11:54 AM
 
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I realize things will change. What I know my challenge will be, is prioritizing everything together. I can't just stop living, but I do expect "living" to take on a different meaning. I don't want things to be exactly as they were, but I do want things to evolve instead of just flip-flop into something else.

I run my own business, mostly from home, and I go places and do things. All of it is going to be more difficult, I understand, but no way will I drop anything off the list without making a fantabulous effort.

This is a well-planned event and I'm ready to be a "mom." That part of things doesn't frighten me at all. I just hope I can juggle my life enough to still be me. And, frankly, the "mommy" crowd is not my cup of tea. All those people who never noticed me before, are suddenly going to want to communicate just because I have a child. I hate that and I plan to beat my drum as I always have: differently.

Anyway, that's just me. I need this in my life, and I'm ready to do what it takes to make everything work. Adapting to new situations is not a problem for me. I just hope I can pull it off enough to maintain the real me in the process. That's all.

And sometimes I worry about whether or not I can do everything. Then I remember, I'm me. Tell me I can't, and I will. That's just how it goes over here.

Wacky Zack! Born 23-Apr-2009
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Old 03-25-2009, 12:01 PM
 
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Nancy, it sounds like you have a very good attitude about this all. You know how you'd like things to be and you know you are very strong willed but you also know that you will be more challenged in doing so in your new role as "Mom".

I've always known I have wanted kids and it is weird to me that some people just don't, but to each their own. For them, living for themselves and their signficant other is what means the most to them. Some people I guess really know that having kids isnt for them and decide to not instead of having them anyway and risking being a bad parent I guess. It's definitley odd to me as well, but I'm sure they find their lives enriching in other ways. We have a friend who had a vastectomy when he was in his 20s (he is still in his 20s) and I'm shocked that the DR was ok with doing this at such a young age. He did it while he was married and his wife was on board, but she changed her mind and they are now divorced and he seems so lonely. It boggles my mind that with the right person he wouldn't have wanted to maybe at least TALK about having kids, but he just did not and that was the end. Anyway, I'm rambling.

Married to my best friend Mama to DS1 4/2009 and DS2 3/2011 and two Remembering 3/2008
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Old 03-25-2009, 12:01 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nancy11 View Post
And, frankly, the "mommy" crowd is not my cup of tea.
I love the "mommy" crowd!!!! Those I know who don't have children just don't seem to understand my life anymore and as a SAHM and homeschooling mom, my children come first. But as I've said before all I ever wanted to do with my life is serve God by being a wife and mom...so I've never had the outside things pulling at me. Sure I need a break, that's what my scrapbooking, bible study and outings with just the girls are for. Everyone has to find their own niche on Planet Parent...and thankfully there are lots of options for each indiviudal. You'll find your niche!!!
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