preggo w/#2 and feelin kinda weird - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 04:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Number one was totally unplanned and a complete surprise. But after the first week of total shock, oh my god what am I going to do, we were really happy.

Now with number two, which we were trying for, its kinda like oh gee we're pregnant. Great I guess. As the weeks go by I am getting more excited but I guess I just didn't expect to feel so ambiguous about a baby I was trying for.
Dp is the same.

Anyone else experienceing this?

Mamma to dd1 3/8/07, one 9.5.08, and dd2 9/9/09
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#2 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 04:45 PM
 
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Our 1st was also unplanned and our 2nd basically was too. I was planning to get pregnant after DS was 2 and weaned, so I am about 5-6months early in that planning department. But I do feel like whatever. I thought it was weird, but I really am not feeling this pregnancy, I am hoping with the coming weeks and the feelings of the movement of the baby to come I will soon feel different. I am even wondering if I am ready for a next baby and maybe that is what is keeping me from getting excited right now.
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#3 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 06:10 PM
 
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bellabaz--I'm in the same situation. I think though that as soon as our bellies start poppin' and our little wigglers start wigglin' we'll feel more present in our pregnancies.

Mama to dd 2/06 and ds 12/09
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#4 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 06:10 PM
 
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I'm not the only one then! We planned this one (just as our first) and I feel like the BFP, which should have been exhilerating, was sort of a let down. My DH wasn't excited, my mother didn't act excited, and I somehow felt letdown by all of this. I also think that the first is a unique experience where everything is new and exciting. I am so busy with my DS that I forget that I am pregnant half the time when it didn't escape my thoughts for even a minute last time. I hope that when I start to show and feel the babe that my excitement will pick up.

mama to L (4) and G (1.5)
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#5 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 06:40 PM
 
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I'm feeling kinda weird too. Both DS and this pregnancy were unplanned, and I have to say, I'm a little nervous to be a mother of two. Potty learning and a newborn? Kinda scary in my mind. What if DS doesn't wean while I'm pregnant? I'm not sure how cool I am with tandum nursing. So many questions and "what if's" I'm glad I still have 34 weeks(at least, if this baby is anything like their big brother) to figure some things out.

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#6 of 19 Old 08-29-2008, 10:04 PM
 
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I'm feeling kinda weird too. Both DS and this pregnancy were unplanned, and I have to say, I'm a little nervous to be a mother of two. Potty learning and a newborn? Kinda scary in my mind. What if DS doesn't wean while I'm pregnant? I'm not sure how cool I am with tandum nursing. So many questions and "what if's" I'm glad I still have 34 weeks(at least, if this baby is anything like their big brother) to figure some things out.
Wow, I am SO in the same boat there. I am delighted, but also freaked out. There are days when its worse; DS had a tantrum basically all day long and I was wondering how the eff I would manage to deal with that and a newborn too! I am also trying to wean, nursing while I'm pg is just way to painful and uncomfortable (and this is after 2 years of nursing with vasospasm and having gone through just about every nursing difficulty in the book). So some difficulties already, more in store surely, all worth it of course, all part of life's cycle!

Book lovin librarian nerd mama to Caleb 6/06 and Aiden 4/09: and 1 angel 11/07. "No one cries alone in my presence."
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#7 of 19 Old 08-30-2008, 10:21 AM
 
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yep, this is an unplanned #3 and that, combined with how shitty i've been feeling physically, is making the pregnancy overall pretty non-exciting. i'm not really at all worried about what'll happen when the baby GETS here. i'm excited for that part. i've done 2, i can do 3. that's not what gets me. it's the pregnancy. i don't really enjoy pregnancy. at least not this time around. both other times there was more of the "magical" feeling, the exhileration, etc...that for some reason there isn't so much of this time around. even though Riley was conceived in a cool way, with all of the signs about his/her name, etc...those things were great but the excitement has sort of died down. and i'm stuck with feeling nauseous all day long. i'm hoping that once the little bean starts kicking and i see/hear the heartbeat, etc...that it'll become more real to me. because right now, i just feel like i have a really brutal flu.
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#8 of 19 Old 08-30-2008, 10:39 AM
 
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because right now, i just feel like i have a really brutal flu.
This is exactly how I feel.

SAHM to one sweet little
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#9 of 19 Old 08-30-2008, 10:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm glad its not just me. And yeah I expect than when I start to show and feel the babe that it will be more real to us both. I worry sometimes too about the timing. Dp will finish his PhD in May and after that we will be moving internationally. So this baby is coming right around the time when we will have all that to deal with. Plus there is dd who will have all those changes to absorb. I think she will be fine because so far she has been really resilient and dp and I handle change very well and don't make a big deal about it, but still. Even though we knew all this when we planned this one, I kinda fell like what have we gotten ourselves into. THanks for the support and letting me know I am not a weirdo.

Mamma to dd1 3/8/07, one 9.5.08, and dd2 9/9/09
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#10 of 19 Old 08-31-2008, 01:46 AM
 
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Yeah, I cry alot because I feel guilty about not being happier about this baby right now. I totally wanted another one, but now I am worried. My last baby was an EXTREMELY difficult baby and it makes me nervous that this one will be too. I honestly almost lost my mind with my last one (who by the way is a fantastic happy toddler now). But when she was a baby , she was sooo unhappy and pissed about everything. She refused to be held by daddy until she was like 18 months old and cried non-stop for the first 8 months of her life. And she just now (last month) started sleeping for more than a 2 hr stretch.
Coupled with that anxiety and the fact that I feel like crap right now makes it really hard for me to be happy/excited. But I know I will change my mind when I start to feel better.
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#11 of 19 Old 08-31-2008, 02:21 AM
 
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My last baby was an EXTREMELY difficult baby and it makes me nervous that this one will be too..
My SIL had this same experience. But when her second was born she said, "If I'd had this one first I never would have hesitated to have a second." He was about a million times easier than his brother....whom I adore but am glad I don't have to directly parent .

This is my first and planned, but I feel some strange reservation myself...like I don't want to commit myself...or something. I can't quite put it into words. We saw the baby on the ultrasound and s/he was moving. That was really cool...but it's still weird. And work is unstable...sigh. I think when we find out the gender and start calling the child by name s/he will become more real, ya know?

Mama to one little blur, watching everything move too fast. Eden 4/10/2009.
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#12 of 19 Old 09-02-2008, 04:11 PM
 
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Totally feel the way you do! I was trying and wishing and hoping, then it happened, and, by all means I am excited, but part of me thought that next month might be a better time. I think it's just the truth sinking in...pregnancy is a huge experience to take on!
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#13 of 19 Old 09-02-2008, 06:19 PM
 
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i am feeling the same way. trying to get excited, but right now i just feel fat and uncomfortable. i think part of it for me is that we will have to move dd again into a bigger place. it will be like the 3rd time shes moved in her 5 years. i know it will be for the better because i will probably get to stay home with her, and we will have more room for her to run around- but i cant help just feeling awful about having to uproot her again.

Leah- mama to Audrey born 12/29/03 and Gwyneth born 4/1/2009! Soon to be TTC #3!
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#14 of 19 Old 09-03-2008, 09:02 AM
 
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My first was planned and very much wanted. I loved her from the moment I saw that second line.
This one was not planned and not at all good timing. I feel so guilty for not being instantly in love with the idea of this baby. I know it'll come in time, and I won't be able to imagine my life without this baby, but right now I'm just trying to get used to the idea.

Casey - Mama to Zola (10-20-07) and Felix (4-30-09)
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#15 of 19 Old 09-03-2008, 11:31 AM
 
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Yeah, we tried for this one for a year, and I still get kind of panicky when DD wakes up in the middle of the night or won't go to sleep and I start thinking, "What am I going to do when I have a newborn that needs all my attention and I'm up all night with and then I have a 2 1/2 year old that also won't sleep and wants all my attention?"
Plus, since I'm a SAHM, I try as much as possible to take the nighttime parenting burden off of DH since he's the one who has to get up and go to work, but with 2 it's going to have to be more evenly split, which makes me feel guilty.

I'm just praying for a quiet, laid-back baby. Basically, the opposite of DD.

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#16 of 19 Old 09-03-2008, 12:04 PM
 
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Plus, since I'm a SAHM, I try as much as possible to take the nighttime parenting burden off of DH since he's the one who has to get up and go to work, but with 2 it's going to have to be more evenly split, which makes me feel guilty. I'm just praying for a quiet, laid-back baby. Basically, the opposite of DD.
Heh, me too. Totally. I can SO relate to all of these feelings. We were trying for this baby - well, I guess you could say we tried for all of one week! I got pregnant right away, after months of us going back and forth about whether we want another child or not.

I've been feeling a lot of anxiety about all of the things y'all have mentioned and just can't seem to get to that high place that came so easily with DD. I guess it's because we were all so ignorantly blissful with our firsts because we had no idea what was in store for us. Now we know our worlds are going to be rocked again!

I did have an ultrasound today and got to see the baby, so I did have that moment of OH MY GOSH! But now I'm back to the usual ambivalence. I figure in time, when I feel the baby move, learn if it's a boy or a girl, the excitement will start to build.

Ever-evolving mama to my beautiful Brynn, and my little dimple-face Noah .
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#17 of 19 Old 09-04-2008, 02:13 PM
 
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I'm with you VeganMama! Our first was somewhat planned, we were ready to start our family whenever it started and we were ELATED when I got the BFP. That bundle of joy just turned ONE!! What are we doing?!?! We have made jokes about our Irish genes plotting against us and destroying the condoms we used!

I'm feeling depressed, and then depressed that I'm depressed and not excited.

We recently relocated back to FL and have been living with my Mom for about 9 months. I don't want to tell everyone while we are still living there! But we are having trouble finding a place. DH is a SAHD so our funds are limited. The place I looked at yesterday I found out today is rented now.

:sigh:

Jessica - trying not to beat myself up over beating myself up

SAH Lubrarian Mamatrekkie.gif to our little man Caelan Paul kid.gif(8/26/07) two bouncy boys Westley Allen and Atticus Joseph fencing.gif(04/14/09) our sweet surprise HBAC Jasper Merle (03/26/13) stork-boy.gif and mate to my retired SAHDH who is now children's author/illustrator Joe Luby http://ow.ly/r8Fom.modifiedartist.gif  
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#18 of 19 Old 09-04-2008, 04:33 PM
 
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[/QUOTE]I did have an ultrasound today and got to see the baby, so I did have that moment of OH MY GOSH! But now I'm back to the usual ambivalence. I figure in time, when I feel the baby move, learn if it's a boy or a girl, the excitement will start to build.[/QUOTE]


Oh my word, Brynn is such a cutie-pie! And I loved reading the things she's said! So many times I've said our family could write a book on the funny things the kids have said, but they never get written down. You've inspired me!

Happy wife and also mommy to my two boys, 12-12-07 (c-sec) and 04-05-09 (vbac!) and another due in December.
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#19 of 19 Old 09-05-2008, 10:34 AM
 
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Oh my word, Brynn is such a cutie-pie! And I loved reading the things she's said! So many times I've said our family could write a book on the funny things the kids have said, but they never get written down. You've inspired me!
Aw, thanks. I do find her utterly hilarious. And those quotes are only the ones I remember AND the ones that are fit for public consumption; I don't know how many I haven't posted because of the mention of nipples and/or poop.

I was coming to post this morning that I woke up feeling different this morning. I felt really connected to this baby for the first time, and it feels really exciting and good! I think I had a dream about the babe last night, so maybe that's what did it...but I am definitely feeling the feelings now.

Ever-evolving mama to my beautiful Brynn, and my little dimple-face Noah .
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