Excuse for not drinking - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 12:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I need some good brainstorming here. I am going out this week with some good friends who will notice right away if I do not drink some alcohol. I'm only 5 weeks so not quite ready to share the news yet. Anybody have a real good excuse? These ladies are sharp, they won't fall for just anything!
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#2 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 12:48 PM
 
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Alcohol is contraindicated with several medications. Perhaps you could be on one of those. Even Tylenol and Ibuprophen if used regularly can cause problems if alcohol is also consumed.
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#3 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 12:53 PM
 
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I too am 5 wks. Was hosting a birthday party for a friend this past Friday night and had the same issue. Ultimately, I decided I am a horrible liar so I told my two closest friends, and they along with my husband helped me "pretend" I was drinking (just sprite). No one asked me any questions.
This coming weekend I'm headed on a girls weekend for football and tailgating (beer). And I'm with you. There seems no way around this.
I was also hoping to not tell so early and I heard that some people order drinks and pretend to sip but then go to the bathroom or somewhere and occasionally pour it out. Or volunteer to be the DD.
But the conclusion I think I've come to is that when it comes to my closest friends, if I have a m/c, I will want them for support anyway so it's ok that they know early.
I honestly didn't realize that cocktails were such a part of my social life until now!
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#4 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 01:00 PM
 
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youre on antibiotics. youve had something really resistant and you cant screw around.
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#5 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 02:06 PM
 
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I agree with the meds excuse. Say you've had a migraine and your doc prescribed Tylenol-3 with codeine, and you don't want to drink. YOu can even lie a little more and say you had a beer the other night, and it made you feel horrible because of the medication so you don't want to risk it again.

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#6 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 03:06 PM
 
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You could tell them you're trying to lose weight and alcohol is just empty calories.
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#7 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 03:09 PM
 
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I bartended for a long time, heres what you do.

Go up there and give the bartender a $10 or $20 up front, whatever you can spare, and tell them "I need you to make all my drinks w/o the booze, I don't want my friends to know I'm not drinking" then wink. Tell him to be sure that he makes all your drinks. You really don't even have to tell him more then that bartenders don't care and honestly we are thrilled when there is a DD in the group (ie, someone rational to talk to when everyone else is throwing up on your shoes)

There are tricks you can use to make Virgins that your friends will never know by looking. Just don't let them taste them. Or if they do taste them make up something about "yeah it is kinda weak, oh well I'm not trying to get plastered"

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#8 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 03:50 PM
 
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OT, a bit...and, I don't have any real advice...
But, this is exactly how I outed myself...without really wanting to. My friend gave me the "why aren't you drinking?" wink wink...I knew she knew and it was out in mere moments.
Good luck...if you are a good liar, you'll totally pull it off. I have a ridiculously big mouth.
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#9 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 03:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all the advice ladies - it is going to be tricky. We are going to a cinema pub for dinner and movie. No bar I can go up to ahead of time, have to give my drink order with everyone else! Some of the ladies I am closer to than others and will have trouble lying to them, the others I would rather not have know! I'm thinking medications...
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#10 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 04:18 PM
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I am 5 weeks too and in exactly this sitation! I have a big work night out on Tuesday, and am thinking about maybe being on anti-bio's for a kidney infection?

On the other times I've gone out I've sipped a glass of wine, had maybe half, and just excused it with telling people I'm quitting smoking and don't want to get pissed as that will make me want a cigarette again... I'm not sure if people actually believe me, but it takes a brave person to ask if you are pregnant. Although actually one guy did but I just told him to f off.

Or! Say you can't drink as you had such a massive night before, you have a really bad hangover...
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#11 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 04:37 PM
 
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That's what I was going to say -hangover, lol!
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#12 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 07:06 PM
 
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a few possibilities

antibiotics (already mentioned but good)
a cleanse (if you are the type to do that kind of think)
a hangover (already mentioned but a good one)

I haven't actually lied yet, but have just been having my DH get me a drink when we are out together, and I have him get me either a plastic cup that you can't see you, or a cocktail straw or something. Or when asked I'll say "I'm just gonna start with water," or something, as if I could switch to beer at any second. So far I haven't had any problems!
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#13 of 24 Old 09-21-2008, 07:13 PM
 
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How about this: You ate something bad last night, and your stomach has finally settled. Anything stronger then water or club soda might set it off again. And you would rather spend time with your friends then sit in the bathroom all night.

Or: I just don't feel like it tonight.
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#14 of 24 Old 09-22-2008, 12:40 AM
 
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Tell them you bet your significant other that you could go party with your friends and have a ball without drinking.

I don't drink, so this is not a problem I'll run into. Good luck!

43 w/Emphysema - TTC from 2005 - 2013. 2 miscarriages in 2008. Good things do not come to those who wait.

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#15 of 24 Old 09-22-2008, 11:42 AM
 
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I would just get something alcoholic and pretend to sip it and then ditch it somewhere.

Mom to 5 wonderful kids (9, 6, 4, 2 and 0), 1 adopted through foster care.

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#16 of 24 Old 09-22-2008, 11:50 AM
 
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I did the designated driver one time and the antibiotics the next time..then just avoided going until I was ready to tell...
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#17 of 24 Old 09-22-2008, 12:09 PM
 
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Well, how about when everyone goes up to get drinks you say you have to go to the bathroom. Then when everyone is away from the bar go up and order something non-alcholic.
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#18 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 02:27 PM
 
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My plan is to say I have a headache coming on and am trying to avoid it with no drinking.

Teacher, Mother of 4
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#19 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 02:39 PM
 
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You could tell them that you are TTC and you are in the TWW. Then they'll be happy that you confided in them, and glad to talk about babies with you.

It's the kind of lie that works because there's a thread of truth.

Good luck!
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#20 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 03:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Matilda_z View Post
You could tell them that you are TTC and you are in the TWW. Then they'll be happy that you confided in them, and glad to talk about babies with you.

It's the kind of lie that works because there's a thread of truth.

Good luck!
ha! my b*tch a$$ friends (oh -can you tell I'm a little bitter about them right now) think that if I'm NOT pregnant, I shouldn't act like I am. So even if I'm in the TWW, I should drink, party, and be generally irresponsible. Nice.

So since I haven't told people I'm pregs yet, I either tell them I am in the TWW and await their eye rolls or tell them I drank a lot last night and am too hungover to even look at alcohol today.

Mom of 2 feisty boys and 1 busy business --Tmuffin--where we help moms connect through birth, babywearing, play, and parenthood.

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#21 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 03:23 PM
 
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I would "start with water," order a glass of wine half-way through the night, have a few sips, and leave most in the glass. You could probably even just start out with the glass of wine and not drink much. Honestly, I would not even notice if one of my friends did this, you know?

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#22 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 05:56 PM
 
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I'm in the April DDC but this is the main reason I was 'outed' very early on. My husband and I play in bands and go to shows at bars very regularly. My friends caught on even when I was just drinking less when we started trying. It's very hard to pull off but if you can pull off the antibiotic line and just drink cranberry juice people might believe you. It's sort of a funny and depressing all at once predicament to be in.
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#23 of 24 Old 09-23-2008, 07:24 PM
 
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I have this problem too except its at someone's house, and its a small group so it will be hard to be inconspicuous. I don't think any of them would be impolite enough to ask me straight out, so I'll just let them think what they want. I wouldn't ever "out" someone by asking them directly, even if I had pretty good circumstantial evidence they were pregnant....most people wouldn't, I would think. They'd just talk about you later
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#24 of 24 Old 09-24-2008, 10:35 AM
 
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Originally Posted by gbutterflykissesm View Post
ha! my b*tch a$$ friends (oh -can you tell I'm a little bitter about them right now) think that if I'm NOT pregnant, I shouldn't act like I am. So even if I'm in the TWW, I should drink, party, and be generally irresponsible. Nice.

So since I haven't told people I'm pregs yet, I either tell them I am in the TWW and await their eye rolls or tell them I drank a lot last night and am too hungover to even look at alcohol today.
Man! That's just wrong! I guess you just get lots of eye rolling and jibes if you try to educate them, hey? That really sucks about your friends, gbutt.
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