My partner and I have been living together for 18 months. I have 2 daughters aged 9 and 13 who live with us. My partner has 2 sons, one age 19 and has left home and one is 15 and lives part time with us. The youngest son did live with us full time but decided over a year ago that they wanted to spend more time with his father- he now spends 5 night a fortnight with us and half the holidays.
My partner and I have recently had issues over styles of parenting and this is now causing a big problem in the relationship. The biggest problem at the moment is working through a certain house rule about the kids eating and drinking in their bedrooms. I say no, my reasons are that it is messy, it leads to accidents and it is anti social. So I tell my girls, no eating or drinking upstairs. When my partners son is here, she finds it hard to say no to him. He can eat and drink in his room at his dads and she wants him to feel at home in my house too. Although I appreciate this sentiment, I still feel that we should have some common house rules.
What do I do. Relent and let my kids eat and drink in their rooms, or stick to my guns and say it is a house rule for all 3 children when they are in this house?