My ex is a nice man and we get along very well. He just doesn't get homeschooling. He wants our DS to be "normal" and I realized quite a while ago that he's a bit different and that I need to get what is right for him and stop trying to make him fit in a box that isn't right. He thinks I have a problem with public school, but I really don't. I just think it's a bad fit for DS.
Here is an excerpt from an email I received from DS's teacher that has me particularly worried (these are just SOME examples):
At the beginning of the school year we were filling out the student information on the cover sheet of the MEAP test. We have to be very specific and as this is the first time third graders ever have to do something like this so it's always very confusing and pretty chaotic. Students must fill in their complete names and then fill in bubbles underneath each letter. I instructed students to write their complete name, no nicknames. This caused R to break down. He sobbed and shrieked in front of the class because he didn't want to have to write his full name. It didn't seem to bother him that the rest of the class was uncomfortable because of his reaction.
We had a long celebration of being drug free. One of our events was stuffed animal day. Richie had forgotten his stuffed animal at home. By the time I had picked my students up to let them inside he was crying to the point of breaking out into hives. He did not settle down and fixated on how he could get a stuffed animal until his dad brought him one 2 hours later.
What I find unique about R is that these episodes happen in front of his peers and it doesn't seem to bother him that they will see him behaving this way. It has caused him to be somewhat alienated from the class, and from what I see he really doesn't care.
R is such a great kid. He often has wonderful advice to share with classmates who bring up problems they're having at our class meetings. R shows kindness towards students in our class who don't have many friends. These instances have happened maybe once every few weeks. They may be infrequent but they have been so surprising that it concerned me so I contacted our school counselor.
Back to me:
My mother is a EI teacher and, until 2 years ago, thought it was just gifted issues, but now she thinks he needs help. She is afraid that he has high functioning AS. The therapist doesn't think so. When he is at a steady level, he is perfectly responsive and doesn't exhibit any of these behaviors. When he is up, he gets reckless and hyper. When he is down, he gets very sad and weepy. When he is in the middle, you would never know something was wrong. At home, he still has these mood swings, but I recognize them immediately and can respond. I can generally stop triggers before they start. Diet changes DO seem to help, but they do not eliminate the problem. Right now I am keeping a notebook with mood changes, and food intake. The therapist thinks that because I make things stable for him, that is why things haven't gone completely out of control. I'm hoping that I can get her on my side and help me convince my ex. I am going to look at my library system today about the books that were suggested. Does anyone out there recognize some of these issues. I've never met any other kids like my DS! LOL