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#181 of 397 Old 09-15-2009, 12:37 AM
 
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i love the bed time routine she talks about in "Heaven on Earth" we have (when I am home) started that a few months ago and it is so nice. if it isn't a bath night the boys get in their pj's and have a bedtime snack and then it is hands, face, teeth and stories and then into bed by 9:30. (which is good for us as they had been up till well past 11pm. :P) if dh would keep that up i think it would be so much easier for everyone. i am working on that one! lol

h

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#182 of 397 Old 09-15-2009, 03:36 PM
 
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I've decided to keep the discussion here for the personal growth topic as I haven't had a big response. It fits...
I'm working through Heaven on Earth, and Rhythm is my first area of concern in our house.
I can completely relate to this! I think I found that part of her book the most inspiring personally. The bedtime routine has certainly been helpful. We don't always get in every part (sometimes they kids are gung-ho for the bath and start removing clothes on the way from the dinner table to the bathroom) and other times it seems like some focused time with me before turning out the light helps. My dh works second shift so bedtime falls squarely in my court. While we always read stories before, I liked her focus on the last 10 or 15 minutes or so being in the bed. So I've had to divide and conquer. I ask ds to get his pjs on, get the books out, and look at them quietly in bed while I read stories with dd. She'll actively hunt down the books that we read at this point all on her own (20 mos). Then after I've read stories with her and spent some time tucking her in, I'll head in to ds' room. Sometimes he still needs to brush he's teeth so we'll do that, but otherwise we'll sit and read stories on his bed, tuck in etc.

They don't always fall asleep right away, but this way is certainly less hectic than before and they're more likely to lay in bed quietly singing/chatting to themselves vs standing at their bedroom door and pounding, crying, etc when I've left the room. Since my kids are 4 1/2 and 20 mos I shoot for a 6:30pm - 7pm bedtime. The earlier for my dd and the later for my ds. We've always had that time frame, but the rhythm aspect seems to have made it much easier.

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Also, taking joy in my homemaking is an area I need to work on bad.
That's also a tough one for me. Mostly because with dh's often long hours I'm mostly on my own for things around the house...and it's hard not to feel overwhelmed by it all. I'm trying to work on having a better frame of mind about it (at the very least wanting to set an example - how can I expect the kids to keep their spaces picked up and tidy if I don't do the same with mine) and saving the most extreme work for when I'm not pregnant - next year maybe? lol

All in all I'm amazed at how well everything I've found fits ds - it really does seem to meet him where he's at. The stories, verses, songs, etc really strike a chord within him!

ETA: I've been doing a bit of reading - mostly Donna Simmon's guides - and it's got me to wondering...what's with all of the knitting? Knitting is preferred to crochet clearly (which as a crocheter I *get* as I've seen this sort of thing before), but can someone tell me why?
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#183 of 397 Old 09-17-2009, 08:51 PM
 
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hope you don't mind...i'm just sort of popping in here when i can...lots going on (we're heading out to homeschool family camp this weekend - yay!)...

i just wanted to share something wonderful i realized this week...my kids are not watching tv anymore!!!!

i was super anti-tv before i had kids. our first was tv-free for two years. got slammed when my second was born...tandem nursing...no sleep...dd gave up her nap. i finally broke down and started using videos (which i believe was actually the healthiest thing i could have done under the circumstances). after a while it got to be too much for me so we went cold turkey no-tv again. then slowly over time it crept back in (but at a level i could handle).

well...anyway...this summer i set the intention to start moving back towards no tv but for it to just happen organically and without any force...and this week i realized that it is happening.

my kids don't ask for tv anymore (unless they are sick or way overtired). our days have been so quiet and fun and more creative and i am just loving it!!!!!!
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#184 of 397 Old 09-18-2009, 12:01 PM
 
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i have been thinking about repurposing a space in our house. outside what would be the master bedroom, but is now the boys room (3 of them anyway) is a weird sort of space. it has no real room for a bed and it has lots of shelves (i have put the boys toys on them), there is a quite a bit of floor space. we have put an old diningroom table (with the legs cut short so it is coffe table height) in there, so they can build on it etc. well, normally i use the actual dinningroom as our "school" space we do art there, etc, but i have been thinking about making that space upstairs into our "school" area. the room/space is a gosh awful color of grayblue (we just bought the house in may and haven't had the time of money to repaint yet) and i was thinking of repainting it a nice warm color and maybe painting the big wall (or at least part of it) with chalk board paint so we could do copy work, and the kids could practice form drawing, etc. i think i would maybe keep certain art stuff down stairs (like painting), but maybe other stuff we would do in this space. i would buy a chalk board but the studs are sort of spaced far and i am not sure i could afford that big of a chalk board. what do you think?

h

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#185 of 397 Old 09-18-2009, 07:14 PM
 
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i have been thinking about repurposing a space in our house. outside what would be the master bedroom, but is now the boys room (3 of them anyway) is a weird sort of space. it has no real room for a bed and it has lots of shelves (i have put the boys toys on them), there is a quite a bit of floor space. we have put an old diningroom table (with the legs cut short so it is coffe table height) in there, so they can build on it etc. well, normally i use the actual dinningroom as our "school" space we do art there, etc, but i have been thinking about making that space upstairs into our "school" area. the room/space is a gosh awful color of grayblue (we just bought the house in may and haven't had the time of money to repaint yet) and i was thinking of repainting it a nice warm color and maybe painting the big wall (or at least part of it) with chalk board paint so we could do copy work, and the kids could practice form drawing, etc. i think i would maybe keep certain art stuff down stairs (like painting), but maybe other stuff we would do in this space. i would buy a chalk board but the studs are sort of spaced far and i am not sure i could afford that big of a chalk board. what do you think?

h
That sounds wonderful. Maybe you could even lazure. If I had the space to have a separate school area, I absolutely would. I've heard it is really beneficial. It would be great to have a single space for school stuff, instead of wherever I can get it in the cabin.

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#186 of 397 Old 09-18-2009, 07:22 PM
 
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Rhythm has been an overarching theme for me this week. I'm learning how very valuable it is and how much little ones really do crave it. I've been back and forth about actually writing a schedule and menu plan, and now I'm thinking it might be helpful to keep us in the rhythm without so much on the spot thinking.

Also, my girls have a small room they share in our two bedroom cabin. It is about 10' by 7' with no closet. Right now, only DD1 sleeps there. DD2 is still sleeping with us. I have taken boxes and boxes of bad toys out of there. I have (since these pictures were taken) put most of their books in a Rubbermaid under the bed. I filled another box of toys today to take off. Now, I need ideas. What else can go? My girls play with very few things, but get so much from their grandparents who won't order from the catalogs I suggest. They also insist that they have things to open and toys. There aren't many museum passes and things to be had in our rural area. Now, since I've tried to stress no more toys, they are buying DVDs... but that's beside the point. That is just how this got to be like it is. I'd love any suggestions.

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#187 of 397 Old 09-18-2009, 07:42 PM
 
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I don't post on here much, but was coming to ask my own question. First though, eastkygal, my girls have VERY small bedrooms too. And we're getting ready to add a 4th child (with only 3 bedrooms about the same size as yours). We have a jr. loft (about 3-3.5 ft. high) for our almost 5 yr old to give her more space in the room for toys and play. And we're considering getting a regular loft for our 6.5 yr old. There's just not enough space on the floor. Is that something that would work for you?

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#188 of 397 Old 09-18-2009, 07:46 PM
 
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We're only waldorf inpired here, not 100% or anywhere near. But I'm feeling like our days are way too crazy since fall arrived and all the coop activities/sports/church, etc. I'm feeling like I'm losing my balance here and our rhythm has been totally off.

So, I'm wondering, how do you maintain rhythm and what does your day truly look like, not the ideal, but the reality? How do you fit in grocery shopping, park dates, dr's appt's, sports, computer/down time for mama, all the housework, and just juggling 3 children (soon to be 4, yikes!) Our days are chaotic most of the time. I'd love to be at home the whole day at least 3 days a week, but I don't see how to make that possible at this point.

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#189 of 397 Old 09-19-2009, 04:21 AM
 
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Knitting is preferred to crochet clearly (which as a crocheter I *get* as I've seen this sort of thing before), but can someone tell me why?
I have no idea but i THINK it's beacuse it's more of a two handed thing? maybe not i might be making that up

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So, I'm wondering, how do you maintain rhythm and what does your day truly look like, not the ideal, but the reality? .
we wake up eat and then go into town and doing shopping/grandmas/bills whatever. We eat lunch in town or come home and eat, we take a nap. pick up his DSD from her bus stop. then we do our activities for the day... normally our craft one first and then free play, then our other activity for the day. inbetween we have cleaning house and free play and after we have free play until dinner.

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#190 of 397 Old 09-20-2009, 11:55 PM
 
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eastkygal: i have never heard of that painting syle until today! it looks beautiful. i am going to have to figure out how to do it. i want to do that all over my house!

h

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#191 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 10:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
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eastkygal: i have never heard of that painting syle until today! it looks beautiful. i am going to have to figure out how to do it. i want to do that all over my house!

h
Teaching Handwork is a most excellent blog and this link there is for her "How to Lazure" tutorial. Enjoy!

http://teachinghandwork.blogspot.com...to-lazure.html

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#192 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 11:21 AM
 
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Oh my gosh! thank you thank you! i tired looking on youtube and got nothing!
happy dance!

h

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#193 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 01:43 PM
 
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I've gotten a cold and it's really throwing our routine off. I'm going to pack up some books and head outside with the girls today instead of trying to keep up with our inside routine. I hope it makes today's lessons super fun!
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#194 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 04:42 PM
 
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We are working on rhythm here too, the weekly sort is working well but I'm still struggling with the daily parts. Sometimes I feel like there are so many different things I should be doing at one time and it seems that the moments when my ds wants to be independent vary day to day.

What do you think are the key parts of the day to "anchor" with as a starting point.

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#195 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 05:16 PM
 
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We are working on rhythm here too, the weekly sort is working well but I'm still struggling with the daily parts. Sometimes I feel like there are so many different things I should be doing at one time and it seems that the moments when my ds wants to be independent vary day to day.

What do you think are the key parts of the day to "anchor" with as a starting point.
I totally hear you here. I think the easiest way to approach rhythm for me is to center it around set mealtimes, snack times, nap, and bedtimes. Then, if I think of those as down time, I know I want to fit the times of exuberance in between with easy transitions from one type of activity to another. So, for example, we eat breakfast (down), I clean kitchen and the girls play (active), then Circle Time (down kind-of), then we sometimes do a Nature Walk or more housework and play (active) lunch (down), straighten up (active), then nap... etc...
Heaven on Earth offers the best suggestions for rhythm that I have ever read.

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#196 of 397 Old 09-21-2009, 06:58 PM
 
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Here's our daily/weekly rhythm.
Our days really do flow along the way the chart shows, for the most part.
Ideally I get up about an hour before the kids do, to have time to myself, to exercise and shower and just BE, but that's the part I'm working on right now, it's not an every day thing yet. YET!
As far as the family rhythm, I think starting and ending the day on the best notes possible is the most important thing. Cheerful words and positive leadership first thing in the morning is important for my kids to see, and starts everyone off on the right track. Kind words, gentle reflection of the day, and hopeful sentiments for the next day are just as important at bedtime.
Also, not taking phone calls or going online except during free time.
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#197 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:22 AM
 
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Here's our daily/weekly rhythm.
Our days really do flow along the way the chart shows, for the most part.
Ideally I get up about an hour before the kids do, to have time to myself, to exercise and shower and just BE, but that's the part I'm working on right now, it's not an every day thing yet. YET!
As far as the family rhythm, I think starting and ending the day on the best notes possible is the most important thing. Cheerful words and positive leadership first thing in the morning is important for my kids to see, and starts everyone off on the right track. Kind words, gentle reflection of the day, and hopeful sentiments for the next day are just as important at bedtime.
Also, not taking phone calls or going online except during free time.
Okay, what I'm asking is about "reality". You mean that you guys don't do any sports or activities outside of the house, such as coop, playdates, etc? You don't ever have to run errands during the week? I mean, your chart looks awesome, but in reality, that doesn't work for most people.

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#198 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 03:01 AM
 
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it seems to me that that is her reality. some people can actually live that way. i mean isn't that sort of what we are trying to get at? some sort of rhythm that we can stick to for the most part. your rhythm may not work for me, but if it works for you then it is perfect. my rhythm may not work for the next person, but it isn't suppose to it is suppose to work for my family. each family is different, we all have different needs, different people we are dealing with and different environments, so no two daily rhythms will look alike. what she is able to do is working for her, and so therefore it is perfect for her. no one can give you a rhythm that works for you, that is what your family needs to work out, which over time you will.
i am working and working on it! and i feel as soon as i get it, we will have to change it, as we won't be able to do a mile hike every week in 90inches of snow, so i will have to find a rhythm that works for us in the winter. but i don't see that as bad. heck it is life. gotta love it! now it is 1 am and i need to get to bed or i will not wake up as a ray of sunshine, but a stormy cloud. haha!

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#199 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 03:11 AM
 
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We're only waldorf inpired here, not 100% or anywhere near. But I'm feeling like our days are way too crazy since fall arrived and all the coop activities/sports/church, etc. I'm feeling like I'm losing my balance here and our rhythm has been totally off.

So, I'm wondering, how do you maintain rhythm and what does your day truly look like, not the ideal, but the reality? How do you fit in grocery shopping, park dates, dr's appt's, sports, computer/down time for mama, all the housework, and just juggling 3 children (soon to be 4, yikes!) Our days are chaotic most of the time. I'd love to be at home the whole day at least 3 days a week, but I don't see how to make that possible at this point.
i am thinking what you might want to do, is just plan for three days where you don't go out. i do. we are a busy family i have 5 kids, so i know busy, but if i want a few days were we hang at home, then i make it work. that means i don't make playdates, doctors appointments, and make sure i have all the food in the house i need for the next few days. mark them on the calendar, "every tuesday, wednsday and thursday we stay home" (or whatever you want) then just make that happen. if you want every tuesday to be a home day or whatever then see what usually happens on those days and see what you can drop or what needs to stay and then change the day. maybe even making out a weekly schedule and printing it out so you can see it would help... a week at a glance sort of thing. fill in what you do on what days and then make the time you need to be home. chores all that home stuff don't have to be different from being home, that is part of being home. doing wash, dishes, picking up etc. that is all a part of being home. maybe making sunday a day of rest and get all your stuff done and then sunday everyone chills, throw something in the crock pot and tada dinner with little work. you know that sort of thing.

h

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#200 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 05:47 AM
 
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Hey, scheelimama, I don't quite know what you're looking for, I guess. Maybe if you share your schedule you can get some more helpful or precise feedback?
That chart is pretty much our standard one, all year long. Right now it reflects a quiet sort of time- summer swimming lessons and play dates are over, fall sports and activities haven't started yet, and we're focusing on getting into the groove school-work wise.
Play dates are in the afternoon, in the section labeled "walk/play", after naps and afternoon chores. That is also when I schedule dr. appointments, music lessons, and do any errands (though there aren't that many during the week days), for the most part.
We don't do co-op, because it takes up too much time for what we get out of it. The kids have lots of playdates, though, two or three a week, and one or two a day in the summer and holidays, and I have a homeschool Mom's get together once a month in the evening.
We do all of our food shopping once a week, on Sunday, where it says "Focus Area: Groceries" which includes going to Costco, the grocery store, the orchard down the street, the fruit stand. It's very rare that I have to go shopping any other time. Meal planning and keeping a tight budget help with that in a huge way. Other errands I mostly take care of on the weekends as well. I did forget to put church on there! Oops!
Sports fit in where they need to- gymnastics is right during nap time once a week, starting next month, swimming lessons are in the evening sometimes, and the kids change from swimsuits into pjs and hop right into bed once they get home! Homeschool swim time is also during nap time. Tennis is sometimes on Saturdays and sometimes after nap time; in the summer it's in the morning. Skiing will happen on Saturdays this winter. 4-H and audobon, kickball, and whatever else we may do fit in, one place or another.
I don't see why a similar sort of schedule planning wouldn't work for others- maybe it looks rigid or something, but it really isn't. I've worked really consistently on our family rhythm and schedule for a long time. It's fluid, adaptable, and I do tweak a little here and there. But it's always there, in the background, and when we're making a choice about accepting a playdate or running an unscheduled errand, I can easily think about how it affects the rhythm. It's not just that I'm out of butter, but whether running to the store to get more will push supper back, which pushes baths and bedtime back, which makes it harder to start the next day on time. Maybe coconut oil will work fine. That play date would be fun, but the little kids are already missing nap twice this week, and need sleep more than another playdate. That picnic sounds really cool, and the family room will survive without it's good cleaning this week. We'll go, and have fun, and make sure next week we get the family room really well.
If maintaining the family rhythm is important, than anything that changes the rhythm needs to be weighed against it. Obviously, sometimes you can't help an appointment at an inconvenient time, or an adventure that just needs to be taken, but that is the way life works. I don't turn down good opportunities very often, and I feel strong and good about turning down mediocre ones.
I used to feel really hectic, trying to get everything in, and I'd find myself doing chores after the boys were in bed, and not getting any personal time. Now I'm really careful about consistent bedtimes, and I hardly ever do housework after they're in bed. That's my time! (I do make exceptions for special occasions and canning season.)
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#201 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 09:13 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Okay, what I'm asking is about "reality". You mean that you guys don't do any sports or activities outside of the house, such as coop, playdates, etc? You don't ever have to run errands during the week? I mean, your chart looks awesome, but in reality, that doesn't work for most people.
Our 'reality' is pretty similar to that.

No, we don't have any sports or activities outside the house. No co-ops, no playdates (Monday-Thursday anyway) and any errands that need to be run will be taken care of after lunch. Our rhythm encompasses that.

Here's ours:

- mama up (ideally an hour before the babes)
- getting up, taking care of morning hygiene, eating breakfast
- everyone dressed
- out the door for the nature walk/hike
- back home everyone gets water and snack (apple slices, etc.)
- morning story/book time (relates to kindergartener's schoolwork)
- 2 younger ones off to play while eldest starts his work
- once eldest is self-focused on work, return to middle child and begin story/book related project
- check in with eldest as he works, assist as needed
- while they work, unload clean dishes and load dirty ones, begin work on lunch
- check in with youngest regularly, redirect when she becomes intrusive (though typically she joins in with whatever middle child is doing.)
- review work with eldest, if more is needed, chat about that, if he's done
- have lunch, clean up
- if there's more to be done, we do it once the table is cleared from lunch.
- once work is done for the day, the boys have freeplay time, inside if the weather is yucky, outside if it's not.
- if errands need to be run that afternoon, we get organized and get going.
- dinner is typically on the later side, as husband gets home at about 6:45
- children freeplay while I prepare for dinner
- after dinner typically everyone heads to the living room for cuddle up and read or building time (legos, wood blocks, etc.)
- bedtime routine starts
- bedtime target for all children: 8:30 (usually we make that)

Friday is our 'flex' day. That is for field trips, longer errands, playdates and longer music lesson. (We integrate pennywhistle playing into the days but learn new things on Friday.)

Along the way there's always lots of creativity, building, coloring and laughter. Even though its not specified, there's also artwork going on all the time. Middle child's activity of the day frequently involves drawing, painting or clay modeling. I tend to have these things going on after lunch, so that eldest child can participate after his work is done.

And our whole day is jumpstarted by the awesome nature walk/hike. We talk about things, they review things that they are curious about. They do experiments (like learning about the different ways that seeds disburse) and learn all about the nature forces of gravity and such.

Plus it helps everyone get the physical activity needed to be ready to sit and listen when we get home.

Today we are off on our nature walk in a little while, wee one isn't up yet, with a big purpose. Our autumnal equinox/mabon commemoration activity is to take bags along with us and care for Mother Earth by picking up all the litter we see.

And I totally agree with PP comment that rhythm is different for every family. This is our rhythm for right now. It will change when the days get cooler and then turn cold. We will still do nature walks as much as we can, but maybe they will shift to afternoon. It will change, also, when middle child is a 1st grader next year...as he'll begin more academic work.

But for this moment in time, this is our rhythm and its only 'job' is to serve the needs of this family right now. We will make necessary changes to make it flex to our needs as those needs arise.


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#202 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 11:05 AM
 
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Mary, thank you for that. We are really struggling with rhythm right now. I am waiting for Heaven On Earth to get here in the mail and it's definitely something we really need to work on! I have been on the computer way too much, and we have all been grumpy and frazzled so our routine is really messed up!

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#203 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I think it is easier when I try to remember what RHYTHM is supposed to be about (IMHO anyway):

-- a tool to help everyone know, roughly, what to expect when

Seriously, a rhythm is not about rules that you must do certain things at certain times. If it were I'd suck at it. I'm not very good at following 'arbitrary' rules -- even if I'm the one that created them.

I spent the summer, while I was doing my waldorf-prep reading, watching our natural rhythms. Everyone has them, or at least the beginnings of them. Look to see what you do when or what your children do when. Write it down and then see the patterns. There can be dysfunctional rhythms too. Writing all of it down can help you identify trends and patterns and rid yourself of the dysfunctional ones.

As much as I don't like routines (I tend to be rather spontaneous) I do understand that young children really need them to feel balanced and calm and well within themselves. They like those expectations. They like knowing what's next and maybe that's because they work so hard at figuring out life and adults all the time.

And I know this is working for us because all three of my children (absolutely famous for going in 3 different directions any time you need them to work together) are fed, dressed and at the door for our 'walking circle time' nature walk each morning. It's a constant wonder to me.

HTH,

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#204 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:37 PM
 
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I think it is easier when I try to remember what RHYTHM is supposed to be about (IMHO anyway):

-- a tool to help everyone know, roughly, what to expect when

Seriously, a rhythm is not about rules that you must do certain things at certain times. If it were I'd suck at it. I'm not very good at following 'arbitrary' rules -- even if I'm the one that created them.

I spent the summer, while I was doing my waldorf-prep reading, watching our natural rhythms. Everyone has them, or at least the beginnings of them. Look to see what you do when or what your children do when. Write it down and then see the patterns. There can be dysfunctional rhythms too. Writing all of it down can help you identify trends and patterns and rid yourself of the dysfunctional ones.

As much as I don't like routines (I tend to be rather spontaneous) I do understand that young children really need them to feel balanced and calm and well within themselves. They like those expectations. They like knowing what's next and maybe that's because they work so hard at figuring out life and adults all the time.

And I know this is working for us because all three of my children (absolutely famous for going in 3 different directions any time you need them to work together) are fed, dressed and at the door for our 'walking circle time' nature walk each morning. It's a constant wonder to me.

HTH,

I really love this post.

The only thing I would add is that rhythm gives balance. I remember when I first came across the concept of inbreathing and outbreathing it was a real "A ha!" moment. To be whole, we need activity and quiet, work and play, the bombastic and the relaxed.

I've said this before, too. Once you find a rhythm, it will click. I'm still using bits of routine that first came into play for us 10 years ago when my first was just a baby!

It's not meant to stress you out, but to bring balance and peace into your life.

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#205 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:40 PM
 
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Oh, and a question.

I loved the wheels for multiplication. As we start to delve into division, are there are beautiful visual representations for that as well?

Also, we tend to do our blocks by the month. I usually spend 3-4 weeks on the more heady stuff, and then a week on heart/hands type work. We're wrapping up our first main lesson blocks: fractions for my fifth grader and review of the 4 function with an emphasis on multiplication for my third grader. I'm excited for next month-- Native American stories for my third grader and Tall Tales for my fifth grader.

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#206 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:48 PM
 
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ITA, routine being rhythm and not schedule is key for us here too. I do have time goals for starting our day though, because otherwise I spend too much time on housechores in the am. Yesterday I was feeling crummy again and slept in. I knew if I didn't do something different for hs, it probably wouldn't happen, so I decided we'd go to the park. We got our stuff together, went and got doughnuts ( oh my, they were so hot and fresh and yummy!) and arrived at the park. There we really followed our regular rhythm of play, lessons, play, lessons. And there were 4 cows nearby for the girls to sketch. We're learning about mammals right now- how wonderful an example of a mammal is a cow!
I'm really glad that yesterday turned out so well. I feel really guilty when lessons get skipped.
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#207 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 12:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I really love this post.

The only thing I would add is that rhythm gives balance. I remember when I first came across the concept of inbreathing and outbreathing it was a real "A ha!" moment.
Thanks!

Yes, balance. I love the concept inbreathing and outbreathing. I think about that often. Our rhythm is loosely based on the idea that we should alternate 'coming together' times with 'solitary' times. So we come together to do our walking circle time and then we go in various directions and then we come together again for lunch and then go in various directions during cleanup and then come together again for afternoon activity...and on and on. It makes sense to me as coming-together-times are inbreathing...literally taking in. And then going in various directions to follow one's interests are out-breathing -- which is an extension of processing.

We are not all in one another's faces/spaces all the time and it helps keep the rhythm...and goodwill...flowing.

It will indeed CLICK when you are feeling a good rhythm. And I totally think that not clicking is the 'early warning system' that the path is too chaotic.

As Melisa (Nielson, author of the Little Garden Flower books) always says in her posts: YOU CAN DO THIS!

I feel great sympathy for mamas who stress over every little detail and worrying about 'getting it all right.' I try so hard not to get caught up in the details and just know that we are all best served by a path (and curriculum) that allows for the basic flow of the day to be good, harmonious, loving and interesting. The rest takes care of itself. Or it doesn't. But the point is, work on only the rhythm and then the rest can work within that structure. Before the rhythm, it's all too chaotic to get good stuff going.

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#208 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 04:38 PM
 
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it seems to me that that is her reality. some people can actually live that way. i mean isn't that sort of what we are trying to get at? some sort of rhythm that we can stick to for the most part. your rhythm may not work for me, but if it works for you then it is perfect. my rhythm may not work for the next person, but it isn't suppose to it is suppose to work for my family.
I think the key is to look at how your days progress and then work from there. What works? What doesn't? What are some easy areas that you can make changes in? I'd start small - don't revamp your entire family rhythm all at once. Try a small change and see if it works. Is it something you can stick with? Then a few weeks later if all is going well consider making another change and evaluate after awhile. Lather, rinse, repeat.

I think gradual changes will be less jarring to the younger members of your family while at the same time making it much more likely that you can stick with them. Of course, as others have mentioned, sometimes you make changes to your daily rhythm - if you've had a particularly busy weekend or been traveling a lot you may choose not to do some things you would normally do.
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#209 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 05:28 PM
 
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I have a rhythm question-when do you all eat meals? My dh is diabetic, so I have to keep them at particular times which IMO is waaaay too early for my kids-they are never hungry when he is. But we want to have family meals like we have since the beginning. But now dh is teaching night classes so I have to have dinner ready by like 4:30 pm most nights (and we don't eat lunch until 1pm usually!). It leaves me no time to do anything after nap as I cook everything from scratch and we end up needing another meal before bed at 7-8pm. I just don't know what to do about this. We were going to try to ease into a later dinner, but now we have to do the reverse.

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#210 of 397 Old 09-22-2009, 05:34 PM
 
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I have a rhythm question-when do you all eat meals? My dh is diabetic, so I have to keep them at particular times which IMO is waaaay too early for my kids-they are never hungry when he is. But we want to have family meals like we have since the beginning. But now dh is teaching night classes so I have to have dinner ready by like 4:30 pm most nights (and we don't eat lunch until 1pm usually!). It leaves me no time to do anything after nap as I cook everything from scratch and we end up needing another meal before bed at 7-8pm. I just don't know what to do about this. We were going to try to ease into a later dinner, but now we have to do the reverse.
I know some families will serve children a little "tea" of their own and then Mom and Dad eat on their later. This actually used to be the custom for everyone not too long ago.

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