Do You Ever Get Tired... - Mothering Forums
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ColwynsMommy's Avatar ColwynsMommy 01:12 AM 10-03-2010
Do you ever get tired of talking about homeschooling? Specifically.. conversations about why we homeschool.

It's that time of year again and our homeschool group has lots of new members. I *love* meeting new families and I love seeing our group grow, but they all want to ask everyone how they came to decide to homeschool, what they like best about it, etc, etc. I get it, because it wasn't that long ago that I was asking the same questions, but it gets so tiring and repetitive to have the same discussions with different people at every meeting.

Anyone else get tired of these conversations? I'm guessing it's something we'll just have to put up with for as long as we homeschool, but I sure wish we could skip over those introductory discussions.

sleet76's Avatar sleet76 01:20 AM 10-03-2010
Yes. It also gets old explaining to everyone else--at the store, park, etc... I mean I like talking about my family and myself (where's that paper bag smilie?), but yes, old. My 7-yo is now obviously school-age-looking, whereas last year she blended in better. We attract much more attention in public these days than before.
Jennifer3141's Avatar Jennifer3141 01:26 AM 10-03-2010
Yes! Absolutely!!
Lisa1970's Avatar Lisa1970 07:25 AM 10-03-2010
I just don't feel like I can be honest about it. I mean, I always thought homeschooling would be great as I was such an eager learner myself and frustrated in school growing up because I wanted to learn, not just sit around and wait for everyone else to be ready. But as an adult, I actually started homeschooling because of the extreme bullying in the public schools. Then continued because I felt the academics were lacking. I tried to return my children to the public school last year only for my daughter to be seriously sexually harassed and threatened and the school to do nothing about it. My son, at the high school, was punished for my breastfeeding, in the back on a classroom, half hour after school let out, with no other kids around but my own. I am disgusted my tax dollars pay for what has gone on in those schools. But try to tell people about the sexual harassment, no one wants to hear it and it is embarrassing. I am sure my daughter does not want what she went through repeated. She had nightmares for months and only seems to just be moving on in the last month or two. And the breastfeeding, I posted about it on my local area board, and people were supportive, But when I went back and posted about how my son was continued to be treated about it, I was called a liar by some people who thought that at high school, a teacher has to go through an extensive strung out process to flunk a child an that a principal could not possibly harass a child. What a fantasy world they live in.

So, if someone asks, I generally make up some half hearted lolly dolly happy story. (we wanted to travel, etc)

I will say though, this year, I have people approaching me who are upset over the extreme level of drug use in our schools. By drugs, I am meaning heroin and ecstacy being done on campus, in classrooms. I know people like to claim drugs are everywhere, but heroin and ecstacy in the classrooms is not the norm in the US. Now I heard rumor that the very moody over the top principal might be using also. I am not sure what all that is about and am actually curious to see if anything comes of it. But I do not feel our local schools are safe. I am sorry, I got off topic. The fact that the local school has such extreme problems has been coming to head this year it seems. I am actually starting to hear a lot from parents about the drug deaths and the nasty tyranical principal and so on. There were also a couple articles in the news about it.
NightOwlwithowlet's Avatar NightOwlwithowlet 01:43 PM 10-03-2010
Last year no one seemed to notice that DS was out with me during the school day. But this year he is a very tall chatty 8 year old and we keep getting the "Why aren't you in school today?' question.

Sometimes during my breaks/lunch at work, I try to catch up on planning the next week's curriculum or reading a homeschooling book, and eventually a coworker starts asking questions about state standards, social contact, or the state of schools today. I'm really tired of it. DS has never attended PS and I went to school out of state. Our issues were with private school. My kid has tons of social contact (after school program, martial arts, best friend next door, sports etc). I started reading fiction during my breaks.

When anyone asks why we home school, I look at DS bouncing on the balls of his feet, asking a gazillion questions about how the cash register works, or why they are digging a new well, or explaining why platypuses are monotremes and just say, "Have you met him? How do you think he'd do in a class room?"
phathui5's Avatar phathui5 02:48 PM 10-03-2010
Not yet. We've been homeschooling for six years now, and our reasons for homeschooling keep changing. I really do enjoy talking to people about why we do it.
AJP's Avatar AJP 04:27 PM 10-03-2010
I don't mind talking about it if the other person is genuinely interested and open about it. I save in-depth conversations for later, after I know someone well enough to gauge whether they'll be offended if I say that I don't care to institutionalize my children so they can be trained to be compliant corporate drones and mindless consumers. I don't initiate conversations like that, but I'm not shy about my reasons if I'm asked by someone else who I know reasonably well. I don't usually bother with any details about our reasons if someone asking about our reasons for HSing gives off a vibe of defensiveness about their own choices or life, because people generally just aren't hearing when in that state of mind. I listen to new HSers talk about their reasons (and usually it's dissatisfaction or very negative experiences with PS), and often affirm that I have heard the same reasons from many others.

Lisa1970, I'm so sorry about your family's horrible experiences with PS.
elizawill's Avatar elizawill 04:37 PM 10-03-2010
in the situation you described within a homeschool group, i still love it. i don't mind talking about it at all, because in that environment i feel totally understood and free to be me. as for other situations, YES! oh my gosh, i get so sick of it. if i hear one more time how someone could never homeschool because of xyz, or they don't know how in the world i do it... that type of conversation is very old for me. i'm not a homeschool converter & i really just don't care what path people choose or why they don't homeschool. i don't care one bit & i don't need them to justify a thing to me. ever. so for me, outside of homeschool groups, i honestly never discuss it...in fact, i avoid it, lol.
PGTlatte's Avatar PGTlatte 08:09 PM 10-03-2010
[QUOTE=ColwynsMommy;15908397]I *love* meeting new families and I love seeing our group grow, but they all want to ask everyone how they came to decide to homeschool, what they like best about it, etc, etc. I get it, because it wasn't that long ago that I was asking the same questions, but it gets so tiring and repetitive to have the same discussions with different people at every meeting.
/QUOTE]

I am always happy to offer support for someone who is in the process of finding their own reasons to homeschool, or re-examining them. But I would rather help them focus on their own reasons that they are finding, than on mine. Mine are old news to me and maybe not all that helpful to someone else.

I've found that it's easy, when someone who is interested or beginning homeschooling asks that question, to say, "there are so many reasons..." and then ask about the person's own situation - are the kids in school, are there problems, are the approaching school age and the parent is dreading it, etc. Usually the person will start talking about his/her own situation and the conversation will come around to me being able to offer support or answer more specific questions.
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