How boys learn differntly and later - Mothering Forums

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Old 04-26-2011, 04:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Back when I first made the decision to homeschool, I remember reading several articles about how boys tend to thrive when more structured education isn't introduced until 5 or 6 (or maybe even later).  I also remember reading some articles about delaying teaching a child to read much later than is the "norm" today.  I have a different computer now, and no longer have links saved.  My DH is starting to pressure me to start a pre school curriculum for DS1, who is 3.  I know he's just not ready...but that's not "good enough" for DH. 

 

Can any of you ladies help me out with some good resources on why delaying will be better for our son?


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Old 04-27-2011, 08:38 AM
 
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Gosh, I know I have some resources on this from my ECE days!  I'll look and post later.  

In general though, boys develop later than girls.  Ones that don't start kindergarten until the latest age(six in most states), do better.  If a little boy is starting Kindy at 5, he may be a full year or two behind some of the girls there, both in age and development.  

 

There is also a lot of research out there about delaying academics or allowing kids to spend more time playing.

 

Before I get flamed- not saying boys are stupid or not as smart as girls, but research does show that they tend to develop later. 


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Old 04-27-2011, 10:53 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yeah, that's the kind of research I want to show DH.  I found one sight, but it has links for an all boys school, so he doesn't trust the information.


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Old 04-28-2011, 06:06 AM
 
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What is your husband's interest in 'pre-" home schooling?  I have never quite been able to wrap my head around the attraction of preschool for people except that parents like to delegate education from the earliest possible moment, while these same parents choose non-academic preschools because of their superior outcome for children who are not in a disadvantaged home.  But what does that have to do with individual parent-directed education?

 

That being said, you might be able to come to a compromise with your husband by planning out a year that will include developmentally appropriate experiences if you remember that the very best, most expensive preschools in this country also manage to convince parents that they are the height of preschool education while teaching actually not very much.

 

Appropriate 4 year old activities might include (the list is not exhaustive):

 

Language arts:  Story time at the library, being read to aloud / audiobooks every day, daily exposure to sounds of target second language (e.g., TV, radio, movies, audiobooks, CDs), Starfall.com, Letter Factory / Word Factory videos.

 

Math / Music:  Counting aloud while taking turns (you hold the ice cream cone while I count to 20, then I hold it while you count to 20).  Singing: the months of the year, the days of week, etc. little educational memory dittys.  Singing and listening to music.  Helping measure in the kitchen.  Reading the digital clocks.

 

Movement / socialization:  Playground.  Bike riding (balance bike first if needed). Swimming.  Gymnastics class.  Many areas start soccer around age 4.

 

 

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Old 04-29-2011, 12:18 AM
 
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This book addresses how preschool kids learn:
 
Here’s an article about how play will help children get into Harvard:
 
Do schools kill creativity? Very entertaining video with some good points to ponder: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iG9CE55wbtY
 
Article on why young kids’ brains aren’t ready for early reading/writing instruction:
 
Here’s an article that discusses how children who start academics at later ages do better in the long run: 
 
Here’s a video on delayed academics in Sweden:
 

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Old 04-29-2011, 06:33 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you thank you thank you!!!

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Originally Posted by SundayCrepes View Post

 

This book addresses how preschool kids learn:
 
Here’s an article about how play will help children get into Harvard:
 
Do schools kill creativity? Very entertaining video with some good points to ponder: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iG9CE55wbtY
 
Article on why young kids’ brains aren’t ready for early reading/writing instruction:
 
Here’s an article that discusses how children who start academics at later ages do better in the long run: 
 
Here’s a video on delayed academics in Sweden:
 


 


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Old 04-29-2011, 09:10 AM
 
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Trust your gut!  Speaking from my own experience with my 7 year old daughter, 4 year old son and 3 year old daughter, preschool should consist of playtime with natural learning activities incorporated.  Just playing, reading a book, going to the farm/zoo/museum, library storytime, singing the ABCs, etc. are natural learning opportunities.  I say I am "homeschooling" my son (even though I feel like I am not doing any "formal" schooling) simply because so many parents feel the need in my neighborhood feel to need to send kids to preschool at age 3 & 4.  Both my 3 & 4 year old are up to speed the same as their peers who attend preschool programs.  My Mom who is an infant mental health specialist worked in a program to prevent preschool-age expulsion.  Most of the referred children were boys simply because boys are much more active and have a different learning style (especially at such a young age) than girls.  Rather than the learning style and teaching method being addressed, the child is labeled a troublemaker!  While I send my oldest, a second grader to public schools I have some qualms about both private and public school and expecting kids to all perform the same across the board and reach "milestones" at the same time.  Good luck!

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Old 04-29-2011, 09:13 AM
 
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Looks like you've got a good list, I'll just add one more book: Better Late than Early by Raymond and Dorothy Moore

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Old 04-29-2011, 11:54 AM
 
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My oldest did not even know his alphabet when he was starting kinder. He turned 6 in November. I was very nervous since he was my first. Everyone made a big deal wanting their children to read by kindergarten. But then, by 5th grade, he qualified for the highly gifted program in public school with ease. My 4th is home schooling (as are my other children now, except my 2 oldest, who will return to home schooling next year). He had no interest in reading at 6 yrs old. But now, he turns 7 in less than 2 weeks and he just took off with the reading in the last few months. I am not worried as I see how things turned out with my oldest. I have also learned through the years that the early readers do not tend to be just that much further ahead. They actually seem to plateau. I have one son who was an early reader, as in, by 3 yrs old was reading BOB books and chapter books by kindergarten. But, he is 9 yrs old now and a little ahead of grade level in reading. He was 4 grade levels ahead when he started kindergarten. Now he is 1 grade level ahead. 

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Old 04-29-2011, 01:44 PM
 
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Don't forget this article.  Great on pushing back early forced reading.


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Old 05-17-2011, 12:36 PM
 
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Old 05-17-2011, 12:44 PM
 
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I don't have a particular article on hand, but if you Google Finland and reading, you'll get some interesting articles that you could show your DH, as well. Finland consistently ranks at the top or near the top in education, and doesn't start formally educating children until age 7.

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Old 05-19-2011, 01:34 PM
 
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Why does your husband want to pre home school your child? I never really understood why parents wanted their children to go to preschool if it is a non academic school. Maybe just to get them out of the house...lol. But seriously, if the house is a bad place, maybe that would be good. (didn't mean you, OP)

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Old 05-19-2011, 07:13 PM
 
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I like the books by the Moores, all of which advocate delayed schooling.

I have never understood preschool, except as a place for working parents to put their children when they're between daycare age and school age.

That said... if it is important to your husband, there might be a point when it's easier to just go along or compromise than to insist that it's your way or the highway. Gaining his cooperation at this stage will help in years to come. I don't mean implement a formal pre-k curriculum, but maybe a few structured activities and a workbook? (I got "about three" for my DD for next year and it looks interesting.) I mean, you can start learning science without your child even knowing it, and you can do montessori activities and make them very much like games.
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Old 05-20-2011, 10:01 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all the help ladies!  DH is reading through some of the resources you've given, plus some I found on my own.  He's already changed his tune.  Just last night when a friend asked when we were going to enroll C in pre-school, he told them we were homeschooling and likely wouldn't start any curriculum until he was at least 6, but maybe even later.  Then he started talking about unschooling!  I'd never even brought that up to him, but he found some info on his own!! 


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Old 05-20-2011, 02:42 PM
 
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It sounds like you have a gem of a husband. :) I'm glad it went so well!

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Old 05-21-2011, 04:19 PM
 
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Just going to put in a different idea...I have a boy and girl, very close in age. While my girl is more behind (she's a Summer birthday)...my boy is ahead. He should still be in preschool but is slowly learning to read and is just a whiz at math. Also..he has very good handwriting. My daughter is 6.5 (officially first grade, but more of a K) and is now learning to read and her writing is still not very good.

 

I think a lot of it depends on your child. They're going to do what they're going to do when they do it. No amount of begging/cajoling/bribing/pleading could have had my daughter learning to read last year. Trust me, I tried. At the same time, there's no point in trying to hold my boy back just because he's a boy or he's younger.

 

Just remind your hubby...he's THREE. No need to do academics at that age.


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