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#1 of 5 Old 06-12-2002, 08:19 PM - Thread Starter
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How does everyone work playmates/playdates into their lives? We have three little ones -- six, three, and 14 mos. Our oldest daughter has one friend we met when she was about 1-1/2. We used to see them weekly, even after we all moved (about 1-1/2 hrs. away). This year, their daughter started kindergarten, so we would always have to make the trek to their house. Their daughter wouldn't be home until about 3pm, so we would have to stay until after dinner (to avoid commuter traffic and the dinnertime nap) if the kids were actually going to play together. We also have a few friends where we live now, but no one that we see as regularly. Most are in school and have really busy schedules. We are also at those awkward ages where I absolutely wouldn't drop off my younger children and don't like to drop off my older daughter unless I know the family pretty well. We are getting to be a pretty big group to descend on someone's house. If we arrange for friends to come to our house, the other moms also expect to stay and often have siblings as well. We also have one girl in the neighborhood who the girls like to play with. This is good because she is close and basically a good kid, but I wouldn't want her to be their only friend (for a number of reasons).

In addition, we have reached a point where the kids sometimes choose friends whose moms (though I'm sure they are nice) I don't necessarily want to spend the day with. Basically, I am a misanthrope and a creature of habit with at least one really social child. How do I fulfill her needs in the least painful way possible?
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#2 of 5 Old 06-12-2002, 09:26 PM
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I like to use the neighborhood park and homeschool activities/clubs for social events/playdates. We don't do playdates too often anymore because (like you said) the kids who are in school don't have time.
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#3 of 5 Old 06-12-2002, 09:49 PM
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Are there any homeschool groups where you live? That has been our saving grace! I also met alot of great moms from LLL but as their kids get older they usually go to school. I would definately look for a homeschool group in your area. We do tons of field trips and then those sometimes turn into play dates!

Good luck!
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#4 of 5 Old 06-12-2002, 10:13 PM
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cassidy, great question...
the above ideas are good.
i'll only add that we have a great ymca near us that offers homeschool pool time.

you've hit on a point i never knew would be a motherhood issue for me...i'm constantly forced to hang out with women that i might otherwise not...sometimes i outright dislike them...simply to provide a well-rounded and realistic view of life for my child.

finally, i am in the process of organizing a small potluck so that dads from my ap and LLL group can meet each other...of course moms and kids will be present as well.

it definitely takes creativity...another mothering requirement that tires me out.
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#5 of 5 Old 06-16-2002, 11:53 PM
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It took a while before we were able to make some close, like-minded friends. I really went out of my way to meet as many homeschoolers as I could in the area though, and that's what I recommend. I've got 3 kids, too - 6, 3, and 1- and my oldest had a couple summertime friends who went back to school in the fall, and I just felt I really needed to find him friends who were homeschooled as well. We got involved with a bunch of different homeschooling organizations and events and it took a while, but now he has a best friend who is the same age, homeschooled, also has 2 siblings, her mom and I get along great, and we even live on the same side of town! We get together with them once to twice a week.

I think homeschooled kids need (at least a few) good friends who are also homeschooled. Same for us moms. Its great for support, convenience, and understanding.

Good luck!

Handmade dress shop owner and mama of five - our littlest just born in December! ♥

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