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#1 of 5 Old 01-15-2003, 03:25 PM - Thread Starter
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My son is in preschool, but will be homeschooled for K and beyond. There was a parent's meeting today with the director. She was talking about socialization and readiness for kindergarden. I like the director and runs her preschool in a very "child-led" manner which is why we sent our son there. Anyway, I brought up that we were homeschooling and offered suggestions for "socialization" that doesn't include school. The director said, "well, when you homeschool, you are taking something away from the child..." I called her later and told her that comment wasn't cool and very untrue. She apoligized and said she was just trying to get across that group learning is important whether you homeschool or use a conventional school. She didn't mean any malic by it. I told her I didn't think she did, but to a homeschooling parent that comment was offensive and she may want to try to be more conciderate to the fact that she will meet other parents who have choosen to homeschool beyond preschool.

But I am kicking myself for not saying something at the meeting. Now all these parents went home thinking homeschoolers are being robbed of something. You should have seen the looks, snears, and secretive comments made about me when I said I was homeschooling...people need to grow the #!* up. So maybe these people wouldn't have listened to me anyways. One mom did come up to me afterwards and said she too wanted to homeschool, but was afraid to say something for being judged.

I just wish I spoke up at the time...

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#2 of 5 Old 01-15-2003, 03:35 PM
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her comment was mean spirited and unneeded to make her point. I am so sorry you had to sit through that! I hope you can prepare some material on homeschooling for her, seems she is the one in need of educating and learning how to speak socially with others.
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#3 of 5 Old 01-16-2003, 03:53 AM
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Sorry you experienced that. I just wanted to give you permission to stop kicking yourself. Most of us have been in situations where we thought of the perfect thing to say after the fact.

You were asking a very good question--If I'm a homeschooler who also believes that learning along with other children can be an important experience, then what are some good ways for me to provide that for my child along with the gifts of individualized instruction, my time and attention, and the freedom to learn at his/her own pace and to follow special interests? Unfortunately, this teacher was not at all prepared to answer that as she has a completely biased view of homeschooling.

And honestly, I think that homeschooled kids get things that schooled kids don't get, and schooled kids get things that homeschooled kids don't get. I think there's always some tradeoff. Hey, kids who don't watch 5 hours of television a day are missing something, and it's something that will often show up as a lack in some of their conversations or play with other kids. And no, I'm not saying that sending your kids to public school is like watching 35 hours of TV a week. In many places though, both ps and lots of TV are "the norm", and kids who don't get either may feel out of touch or like they are missing out.

Maybe you can connect with the other Mom again. If she homeschools, too, your children may have lots of fun learning together. I do think that group learning, experience, and play is a good thing. Your kids could share some lessons (if you both do lessons), plan and plant a garden together (I have a curriculum called _In the Three Sisters' Garden_ which is integrated, not didactic, and can really grow year by year).

Well, I'm rambling and should be in bed. Sorry you had such an annoying experience. Unfortunately, people make weird assumptions about homeschooling and just don't get how flexible and varied it is for many of us.

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#4 of 5 Old 01-16-2003, 01:53 PM
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Wow. I was just sitting here thinking of all the things that homeschooling *does* take away from my child...

Let's see, my poor child will miss out on being told what to do by a stranger for seven hours a day, five days a week, for thirteen years. He will never know what's it like to be hearded around by bells and have to ask permission for such basic, personal things like having to use the rest room or get drink. He will never be told he is not as good as someone else because he does not have a certain name on his shirt and he will not know what it is like to bullied. He will completely miss out on being forced to learn at someone else's pace for his entire education. He will, I'm sure, miss out on these and quite a few more!

Just think how nice it would be these things were "taken away" from all children!
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#5 of 5 Old 01-17-2003, 08:22 AM
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I couldn't agree more with the respondants above...socialization or 7 hours of conformity? My child gets plenty of socializationwithout the commercialization and material focus to which so many kids in ps are bombarded!! Many homeschool experiences offer socialization with many people of differing abilities, ages, interests, and personalities. My child socializes with infants-adults on a daily basis, and more adults than he would be exposed to in a school setting. We also do community service in a foreign country, so he is seeing a whole other set of adults, infants, children with similarities and differences to our own culture. Socialization is definitely NOT a problem for homeschoolers. We socialize probably more so than children in ps and with a greater variety of people,who is better suited for the real world than kids who have learned to communicate and cooperate with many different groups??? Don't take it on yourself to change your preschool's mind about homeschoolers, let them see by example all the rich social expereinces and social maturity your child/ren develop!! Actions speak louder than words and good for you for being the Adult in the situation!!
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