Originally Posted by folkypoet
Instead of holding it between my thumb and first finger and resting it on my middle, I hold it between my thumb and middle finger and rest it on my ring finger.
O.M.G.!!!! My sister did the exact same thing! I've never heard of anyone else writing like this. (And, she also became an elementary school teacher with perfect handwriting!)
Anna--My dd was exactly like yours at that age. It didn't matter if I corrected her gently, or made suggestions, she didn't want to hear any of it. Regardless of whether I "should" have been able to correct her, or if she "needed" correction, it was useless to try because she would just put up a wall.
I completely understand what you mean about other people thinking of this as a problem--and I'm right with you in seeing the value of her independence. But, it can be a little frustrating, too. After trying one too many times to "help," I just decided to follow her lead and respect her feelings. If I saw that she was struggling, or knew of something that would make things easier on her, I'd say something like, "Can I make a suggestion?" If she said, "No." then no it was. There were times when it was hard to bite my tongue, but if I didn't she'd just get frustrated with me, or quit altogether, so it was really important that I not step over her boundries, yk? I guess she was "unteachable" for a while there, but that didn't mean that she didn't learn anything
Over time, she's become more open to input from others. She has taken classes and gone to seminars and she's worked with coaches all with no problem. She still does not follow anyone blindly, and will often ask "Why?" when told to do something a certain way, but that's fine! Other times, she'll listen to input but still decide that her way is better. Sometimes she's right, sometimes not, but she's also able to admit that at this point.
Not too long ago, she wanted to learn to knit and she asked me for help. I began explaining to her, and the SECOND that I got to the part that answered her question, she ran off saying, "Thanks, Mom! That's all I needed!" *I* wasn't finished teaching, but that was irrelevant.
She wants to figure things out for herself and I've learned not to force things.
She is more accepting of teachers/coaches giving her instruction (NOW--certainly not at age 4!) I suspect that she's just being tolerant of them and understanding that that's what they DO. But she patiently lets them go on with their direction and then either asks questions or tries it her own way before deciding what's "right."
But, she is who she is. She's not rude about it, she's just very independent. I like that about her.