Kindergarten fun?!?!?! - rant - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 12:18 PM
 
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When my sister started homeschooling at the age of 13 due to horrible teasing and bullying at school, I used to ask her those same questions. My step-mother told me why they were homeschooling, what areas she was lacking in, everything they learned from assessments and what curriculum they were getting. So, whenever I'd ask a question about "how are your classes?" I wanted an answer such as "well, I like this, I'm working on this, taking this/that class, etc." It always confused me when I'd get a really vague answer after all of the details that were part of our conversations in the beginning.

Now that I'm going to be homeschooling, I can kind of understand why the answers were vague...the curriculum wasn't for them and they're just going with the flow and don't want to say it....or at least, that's what I'm thinking is the case. My sister is on the spectrum, so I think that the curriculum probably didn't fit her and my step-mother would never put her back into school to endure terrible teasing.

What I'm trying to say is that just because you are not in school doesn't mean that you can't give the answers to the questions that people ask. "How's school?" I would say "Homeschooling is going fine, we worked on ____ last week and that was fun." Or stick with "Homeschooling is going fine"And then ask them about themselves. Hopefully I won't get angry or upset at thier ignorance when they're just making light conversation.

I'm sure it gets annoying because homeschooling is so misunderstood. I'll just have to remind myself that most people haven't read as much about it as I have.

Lisa

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#62 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 12:33 PM
 
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I HS'd my daughter for PS and K, and for a month of 1st grade. then she really really really wanted to go to public school. She loves it there and is learning so fast and loves her teacher. When I go there to have lunch with her or to visit, all I see is a teacher who has to try and keep kids (usually boys) in their seat and listening, and the other kids (usually girls) waiting to learn. It frustrated me so much to see DD sitting there waiting... waiting.. waiting... that I've applied to get her in a Montessori school, which I know will be a better fit for her. and its a public school too! The lottery is next week, wish us luck!
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#63 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 01:37 PM
 
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I think homework teaches children that work doesn't end just because you go home in the afternoon.
That's one of the stranger rationalizations I've heard for homework for young children.

When I grew up I always had work to do at home - because I'm a musician, and I have to practice at home in order to do my work well in the first place. But I learned *that* as an adolescent who loved to play the violin, and knew what I needed to do to be good enough to do it professionally. In fact, that's when I made a unilateral decision to STOP doing homework, as school annoyed me and I didn't want to bring any of it home. Interestingly enough, although this annoyed the teachers and they kept muttering about external exams etc. etc., we all knew perfectly well that it was what I was doing that was preparing for the real world - not their stupid homework.

And JFTR, I didn't have homework till 6th grade, and then only an hour a night. I can't begin to see why homework is necessary for elementary students. Six hours a day isn't enough???

It's funny - I have violin students coming to my house and the parents know ds (7) is HSed. Yet one of them was asking him about homework (he was 5 or 6 at the time). He said, "No, we homeschool." Her response was, "I know, but you have homework, don't you?" :
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#64 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 03:09 PM
 
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but we laughed and laughed that dd just kept sweetly saying, "No," rather than trying to explain or justify anything.



no longer  or  or ... dd is going on 12 (!) how was I to know there was a homeschool going on?
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#65 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 04:49 PM
 
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What I'm trying to say is that just because you are not in school doesn't mean that you can't give the answers to the questions that people ask. "How's school?" I would say "Homeschooling is going fine, we worked on ____ last week and that was fun." Or stick with "Homeschooling is going fine"And then ask them about themselves. Hopefully I won't get angry or upset at thier ignorance when they're just making light conversation.
Lisa
Bravo Lisa. I wholly agree here. While some of the quirky retorts people come up with on the homeschools lists are often catharctic and funny to read, I really strive to be respectful to other people's respectful questions, or light conversation making - even when I've been asked the same question for the 800th time. Otherwise, we really do nothing but put a bad face on homeschooling to the world at large.
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#66 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 04:51 PM
 
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I'm so confused by this thread. Did it start out in the general education forum or was it always in the learning at home forum? I don't really understand why some posters are trying to convince homeschoolers that kindergarten is so great?

My dd is 3 years old... she's getting questioned about preschool already. I find that people just generally seem to assume that she's going to be deprived by her lack of "preschool" experience and of course I am too because I'm not getting a "break".

An extrovert, married to my introverted dh since '01, mothering my girls C (2003) and G (2006).

 

Love homeschooling, reading, cooking (most of the time grain-free except for when I'm not ), lactivist, former and wanna-be cloth diaperer and baby-wearer...

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#67 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 04:59 PM
 
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What I'm trying to say is that just because you are not in school doesn't mean that you can't give the answers to the questions that people ask. "How's school?" I would say "Homeschooling is going fine, we worked on ____ last week and that was fun." Or stick with "Homeschooling is going fine"And then ask them about themselves. Hopefully I won't get angry or upset at thier ignorance when they're just making light conversation.
I think that's why birds of a feather get together to vent.

There are all sorts of things that people say out of ignorance that others find annoying. How many times have you read a thread here at MDC about some mama who got her feathers ruffled by some stranger suggesting that she stick a bottle in her baby's mouth? Or that babies should sleep alone because co-sleeping is dangerous or coddling?

I'm sure most of the mamas here are patient with strangers ridiculous comments and questions. It doesn't make the conversations any less annoying, though. And so we come here to let out our frustrations.
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#68 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 05:02 PM
 
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I'm so confused by this thread. Did it start out in the general education forum or was it always in the learning at home forum? I don't really understand why some posters are trying to convince homeschoolers that kindergarten is so great?
The thread was always here, AFAIK.

I think that when homeschoolers voice their opinions about the general suckiness of school, schoolers get defensive.
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#69 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 05:56 PM
 
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I'm so confused by this thread. Did it start out in the general education forum or was it always in the learning at home forum? I don't really understand why some posters are trying to convince homeschoolers that kindergarten is so great?
Here's the OP:


Kindergarten fun?!?!?! - rant

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ds is not ever going to kindergarten. People ask him how old he is, he says 5. They ask if he's in kindergarten. He says no. They say "oh, next year?" He says "never". Then they insist on trying to convince him it's fun. Maybe it used to be fun 30 years ago, but here the kindergartners have *homework* *every night*!! And there is no "play time" like there was when I went. It doesn't sound fun to me!!! Do they think they're doing me a favor? It's annoying!!! I'm trying to get him to say he's homeschooled, but in the meantime
for reading, I feel better now.

It's about a son who is going to be homeschooled and about strangers trying to convince said son that kindy is fun. Several homeschoolers chimed in with their stories on how they feel kindy is not fun and former homeschoolers or never homeschoolers argued the homeschoolers are closeminded and paint generalizations about fun and kindergarten! LOL!

Sincerely,
Debra, homeschooling mom of 4 ages 10 (AS), 9, 7, and 3 1/2 (Autism)
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#70 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 06:07 PM
 
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I'm just going to respond to the OP.

I'm a schooler. (DH is vehemently against it, I'm more open to it, but I don't think it would work, personality wise.)

K (these days) is horrible!!! (The rest of the grades aren't that great either.) Maybe 25-30 years ago they were better (more developmental, more hands-on) but my friend says it's all work-sheet after worksheet.

I was fortunate to have my son continue in his parent co-op preschool's Kindergarten. There were 4 parent volunteers every day, in addition to great hands-on centers. We had a monthly field trips. The things we did in one week blew away anything a typical K did in a month. We were given homework every night too and DS totally had no interest, so I stopped trying.

The District took it over last year (good for the teacher, so she could get a much better salary, benefits, etc...) and mid year the District (the superintendent of Elementary education in particular) tried to kill it. The parents rallied and saved it.

I don't know WHAT will become of it or how long it will last.

I don't know what I'll do when my youngest is K age. I do NOT want her in my typical local K setting.

My son is on a wait list for an Open type classroom (more alternative.)

10 - boy
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#71 of 105 Old 12-24-2006, 07:57 PM
 
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I"m curious about why it annoys some of you for people to ask what grade your children are in?

Dd knows she is a kindergartener, and dd#2 is looking forward to being a kindergartener herself in two years. I use curriculum planners that are based on grades, and dd knows that we are working on 2nd grade Singapore math. It's not a big deal, but she sees the materials and can read the grade level on the front. We go to groups and classes that are organised by groupings of grades - dd goes to a K-2 science class, a K-4 history group, a K/1 social group, etc etc.

If anyone asks me if there's no school today, or what grade she's in, I just answer. I really can't see why it's a big deal - she's a kindergartener and we homeschool.

As for kindergarten being fun, I know for a fact that the kindergarten at our local school is a whole lot of fun. The kids love it! It just wasn't right for our family. Dd has more fun in a science class with a small group of kids, or on a field trip with a mixed age. I have friends whose kids do better at kindergarten.

I must admit that I get a little irritated sometimes about some homeschoolers' attitudes to the public questioning them. I had a really horrible experience with a homeschooler myself at the stage where we were questioning whehter or not to send our kids to school. I met a homeschool parent at our vets. His 15 y/o daughter was working there voluntarily, and I was astounded by her maturity and competence. As I stood in the waiting room, I tried to strike up a conversation with him about homeschooling, mentioning that I would love to homeschool my own kids. His look said it all - actually, it said what some people have said here. Like, "Why do members of the public think that all kids are at public school? Why do they ask irrelevant questions like what grade my child is in? Why do they assume that it's against the law, blah blah blay."

I shut up, and that was that. He then chatted to other people in the line in a most pleasant and friendly way - about other subjects, so this was not a generally unfriendly guy. It was a homeschooler who clearly thought that I was an ignoramus. How sad that an obviously very competent homeschooling parent couldnt find it within himself to chat to me about what they were doing, and encourage me to find out more. After that experience, I try very hard to be open and friendly to anyone who asks me any question about my kids and school. I have never had anyone respond in anything but an interested and polite manner.
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#72 of 105 Old 12-25-2006, 02:39 AM
 
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I"m curious about why it annoys some of you for people to ask what grade your children are in?
Because one reason many of us homeschool is because we don't like the way schools label and group kids by age. Lots of us don't do grades.

It's like if you CD and people constantly ask why your baby isn't wearing Pampers, "like all the other babies." Or if your child is drinking an organic juicebox and people ask why your kid can't drink Hi-C, "like all the other kids." It gets seriously OLD after awhile.

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If anyone asks me if there's no school today, or what grade she's in, I just answer. I really can't see why it's a big deal - she's a kindergartener and we homeschool.
I'm 35 and I'm not in any grade. My kids are 14 and 11, and they aren't in any grade, either.

If someone asked you what grade YOU are in, how would you reply?

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As I stood in the waiting room, I tried to strike up a conversation with him about homeschooling, mentioning that I would love to homeschool my own kids. His look said it all - actually, it said what some people have said here. Like, "Why do members of the public think that all kids are at public school? Why do they ask irrelevant questions like what grade my child is in? Why do they assume that it's against the law, blah blah blay."
Well, to play Devil's Advocate here....

I've met many people who say they'd like to homeschool their kids....but they just can't, because they have to work (I work) or because they aren't patient enough, or not organized enough, or because they wouldn't be able to stand being around their kids all day. Most people who say they'd like to homeschool....really don't want to homeschool. They often just feel insecure about their own choices, and feel the need to justify whatever they're doing.

I've only met ONE person who asked me about homeschooling who actually went on to do it after we talked about it.

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I shut up, and that was that. He then chatted to other people in the line in a most pleasant and friendly way - about other subjects, so this was not a generally unfriendly guy. It was a homeschooler who clearly thought that I was an ignoramus. How sad that an obviously very competent homeschooling parent couldnt find it within himself to chat to me about what they were doing, and encourage me to find out more.
No offense, but I really don't have the desire or energy to be a cheerleader for homeschooling. Nobody babysat me through the process; I found out what I needed to know on my own. There is a slew of information out there, between the Internet, public library, bookstores, and local homeschool support groups. If people are seriously interested in learning more about homeschooling, I'd like for them to not stop me in the middle of the supermarket to chat about it.

It's likely he didn't think you are an ignoramus at all. He might be just tired of discussing homeschooling with strangers every time he leaves the house.
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#73 of 105 Old 12-25-2006, 02:10 PM
 
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I really think some adults don't know how to talk to kids. So they assume kids are in school and ask about that.
k
And they think our kids don't have social skills. Too bad they only know how to relate to people their own age.

Kathi

:::Mom to 5 adult children and 8 year old, Dakota "Why do they call it homeschool, we're never at home?"
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#74 of 105 Old 12-25-2006, 06:16 PM
 
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I HS'd my daughter for PS and K, and for a month of 1st grade. then she really really really wanted to go to public school. She loves it there and is learning so fast and loves her teacher. When I go there to have lunch with her or to visit, all I see is a teacher who has to try and keep kids (usually boys) in their seat and listening, and the other kids (usually girls) waiting to learn. It frustrated me so much to see DD sitting there waiting... waiting.. waiting... that I've applied to get her in a Montessori school, which I know will be a better fit for her. and its a public school too! The lottery is next week, wish us luck!
As a mother of a boy who cannot "sit still and learn" it frustrates me that the school system is trying to cram more active learners (mostly boys) into the "sit still while I pour information into you" mode of learning. That was one of my biggest concerns with sending DS to school. He is very bright but also very active. Whereas at home I can make allowances for his need for movement and still find ways to encourage his interests etc. in school he might well be labelled a trouble maker or even worse "learning disabled" because he doesn't learn best in *that way*. I think that does a huge diservice to many many children.

Steph

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#75 of 105 Old 12-25-2006, 07:51 PM
 
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I"m curious about why it annoys some of you for people to ask what grade your children are in?
Well, I wouldn't say it annoys me, but I find it mildly irritating to have to explain. I do not use a curriculum planner. Besides Singapore Math (which doesn't match their age-grade) we use no levelled materials. We don't divide their learning into subjects and grades and they don't attend classes that are organized by grade. Soccer is done by age/size/experience, art classes are by interest, orchestra and music group classes and ensembles are ability-levelled. I honestly have a hard time keeping track of what grade my kids would be in if they were in school because we have so little to do with the grade-levelled world, and because, while my kids' birthdays are all during the fall and early winter, they fall on both sides of the cutoff date and I have two who would be old-for-grade and two who would be young-for-grade and I honestly have to think through which way it works each time and do some math to figure out what the grades would be. Besides which, I'm pretty sure my kids are not even close to grade level in the vast majority of areas of skill or knowledge, and I suspect that our local school would have placed them in different grades than their agemates anyway if they attended.

I'm really anti-labels at the best of times, and I just simply cannot envision how I could feel there was any validity to saying "Sophie is a 2nd-grader". She isn't learning 2nd-grade material (or any grade level for that matter), she does no classes where she is lumped into a group based on her grade level, she has no social identity within a population of children where she defines herself according to age & grade. So it would feel really odd to call her a second-grader.

I love 2tadpoles' parallel to military rank (somewhere in the first 20 posts of this thread). Asking my kids what grade they're in makes about as much sense, and is about as difficult to answer, as asking what military rank I'd be if I was in the military. Dealing with a question like that isn't annoying to me ... it's just an awkward and odd and confusing question from my perspective, and betrays a mindset that's so different from mine that I know giving an honest answer from my own perspective is going to require a lot of explanation.

ETA: Oops, I think Sophie would actually be a third grader in Canada, because she turned 8 before Dec. 31.

Miranda

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#76 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 02:02 AM
 
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Britishmum...I don't care what people ask me...I can give them a pretty full answer on grade levels and how my kid fits/doesn't fit them.


I do wish people wouldn't ask my kid...or argue with her when she says she doesn't go to school; she's homeschooled. (Yes, you do go to school. You just go to school at home...Well, nice stranger, not so much.) Or ask her *why* she's homeschooled. Or get irritated when she's says she loves being homeschooled (and you happen to be the lady at church who just won an award for being ps teacher of the year or something, no kidding.)

The other thing is that if she says she a kindergartener, people don't believe her. She has an extensive vocabulary and can talk to anyone. She's taller and bigger than other kids her age. She mostly takes it in stride when people argue with her, but sometimes it's just hard. She's only 6, ya know?

And besides, they are wasting valuable conversation time when they could be learning about the possibility of life in the Oort Cloud from her.
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#77 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 10:32 AM
 
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No offense, but I really don't have the desire or energy to be a cheerleader for homeschooling. Nobody babysat me through the process; I found out what I needed to know on my own. There is a slew of information out there, between the Internet, public library, bookstores, and local homeschool support groups. If people are seriously interested in learning more about homeschooling, I'd like for them to not stop me in the middle of the supermarket to chat about it.

It's likely he didn't think you are an ignoramus at all. He might be just tired of discussing homeschooling with strangers every time he leaves the house.
I definitely 'get' how irritating it can be to constantly feel on the defensive about our choice to homeschool -- or to even have to discuss it at all during the mundane moments of our life.

But to play devil's advocate to your advocacy . . . if the general stereotype is that homeschoolers lack social skills, then perhaps it behooves all of us to act in a manner that expresses decent social skills, while respecting our needs and other people as well.

I could think of a long list of ways to handle the situation British Mum found herself in that hopefully wouldn't have left her feeling like an 'ignoramous'. Perhaps a few ideas would be:

"This is an really extensive topic, and if you're truly interested I'd be happy to discuss it with you over coffee sometime."

or

"Lots of people seem interested in homeschool. I always recommend the book XYZ by xxx xxx which has a lot of basic information. Unfortunately, I don't have time right now to go much into it myself as I've got to pick up my daughter from karate lessons in a few minutes."
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#78 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 11:43 AM
 
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. . . if the general stereotype is that homeschoolers lack social skills, then perhaps it behooves all of us to act in a manner that expresses decent social skills, while respecting our needs and other people as well.
But some people are just jerks. Homeschoolers included.

If the general stereotype is that hsers lack social skills, are we trying to replace it with a stereotype that hsers are all friendly? Or can we just let them be people?

Holding a group of people responsible for the ignorant prejudices of others......? Why is it okay in this instance?
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#79 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 06:40 PM
 
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Holding a group of people responsible for the ignorant prejudices of others......? Why is it okay in this instance?

I think we need to reframe the idea that it's about the 'ignorant prejudices of others' . . . because often times, it's just people innocently making small talk, and not having any idea they're walking into someone else's pet peeve. Granted, there are plenty of times when people really are acting ignorant & rude, but I trust most of us can tell the difference.

I'm not arguing about replacing the 'unsocialized' homeschooler stereotype with the friendly homeschooler stereotype . . . but I do really believe that in most cases being kind is the way to go. Most world religions are based on that fact. And that's the way this website advocates we treat our children. Wouldn't it make sense to treat a kindly, albeit uninformed stranger with that same level of respect?
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#80 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 07:25 PM
 
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#82 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 08:32 PM
 
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And another thing, I don't think the school system is "labeling" children when they put them in grade levels. It would make absolutely no sense for children to go to school with 1000 other kids in grades k-5 and be all mixed up with some 5, 8 and 10 year olds in one class and in another class there would be some 6, 9 and 12 year olds. It keeps things in order for children to be put in age-appropriate classes. Surely as an adult you should be able to comprehend that.

The fact that they are placed in age appropriate grade levels does not bother me in the least.
Why doesn't it make sense for children to go to school in a mixed-age classroom? Who defines what is an age-appropriate grade level? Children are all so different and just because they share the same birth year does not mean that their needs are equally met in the same grade. Some are always "ahead", "on track" or "behind". I think it would make much more sense to just place children where their needs are best met...that would mean that all 8 year olds would not be in the same grade. That's why the grade concept is weird to many people. We don't all believe grades are age-appropriate fits. Since a reference was made to college, not all college juniors are the same age. Not all first year graduate students are the same age. If it's this way for adults, why can't children's individual needs also be met as such, rather than organizing them by birth year? Who does this keep things in order for? It certainly doesn't keep things in order for all children, as so many don't have their needs met this way. This is why the "grade" concept is awkward for many homeschoolers. I know that my own child is at multiple "grade" levels. If he were in school he would be a kindergartener. But we don't use a kindergarten curriculum at home. He's not a kindergartener to me. He has an individually tailored curriculum that runs across numerous grade levels (some ahead, some behind, and some at K level).
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#83 of 105 Old 12-26-2006, 10:20 PM
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Some of the posts here are a bit heated, so I wanted to pop my mod hat on and remind everyone to post respectfully and keep the rules in mind. Also, the purpose of this forum is to support homeschoolers and homeschooling, and posts that aren't related to that goal probably belong in other forums.

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#84 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 12:51 AM
 
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I don't think the school system is "labeling" children when they put them in grade levels. It would make absolutely no sense for children to go to school with 1000 other kids in grades k-5 and be all mixed up with some 5, 8 and 10 year olds in one class and in another class there would be some 6, 9 and 12 year olds. It keeps things in order for children to be put in age-appropriate classes. Surely as an adult you should be able to comprehend that.
I agree, except that often schools tend to (a) exercise age-levelled grading when it runs contrary to learning needs and (b) create an artificial and divisive social identity out of that age-levelled grading.

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#85 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 01:37 AM
 
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I think we need to reframe the idea that it's about the 'ignorant prejudices of others' . . . because often times, it's just people innocently making small talk
When I mentioned "ignorant prejudices," I was referring to the notion that homeschoolers are socially inept.

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I do really believe that in most cases being kind is the way to go.
I don't think anyone was advocating being unkind. I was just mentioning that some people are kinder than others, and we shouldn't expect any more or less of homeschoolers as a group.

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Your statements are very "out there" IMO. ofcourse you aren't in school at 35
And my kids "aren't in school," either. We've opted out.

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why be so angry about it? I guess I just don't get it.
You read too much into things. I never claimed to be angry. I don't go around being ugly to people who ask me questions. I find it irritating, is all. Especially if they're asking just out of a desire to debate, and not because they're truly interested.

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When I used to homeschool I think probably 60% of the other parents I knew who homeschooled were very cold and cruel to outsiders about what they did as if they felt guilty for keeping their children at home all day.
That's not been my experience. I've homeschooled for seven years, in three different states. Most of the homeschoolers I've met have been friendly.

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why are you so angry about people who ask what grade your child is in? the fact IS that most people do NOT know one single thing about homeschooling and are naive when it comes to homeschooling. why be rude or mean towards them for asking innocent questions?
Once again, you're saying that I'm angry. Where have I said that I'm rude or mean towards others?

As for the rest of your post, where you explain how the way schools do things (grades, etc.) makes complete sense....I don't like the way schools operate, and that is why my kids aren't made to go.
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#86 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 03:59 AM
 
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Because one reason many of us homeschool is because we don't like the way schools label and group kids by age. Lots of us don't do grades.

It's like if you CD and people constantly ask why your baby isn't wearing Pampers, "like all the other babies." Or if your child is drinking an organic juicebox and people ask why your kid can't drink Hi-C, "like all the other kids." It gets seriously OLD after awhile.



I'm 35 and I'm not in any grade. My kids are 14 and 11, and they aren't in any grade, either.

If someone asked you what grade YOU are in, how would you reply?



Well, to play Devil's Advocate here....

I've met many people who say they'd like to homeschool their kids....but they just can't, because they have to work (I work) or because they aren't patient enough, or not organized enough, or because they wouldn't be able to stand being around their kids all day. Most people who say they'd like to homeschool....really don't want to homeschool. They often just feel insecure about their own choices, and feel the need to justify whatever they're doing.

I've only met ONE person who asked me about homeschooling who actually went on to do it after we talked about it.



No offense, but I really don't have the desire or energy to be a cheerleader for homeschooling. Nobody babysat me through the process; I found out what I needed to know on my own. There is a slew of information out there, between the Internet, public library, bookstores, and local homeschool support groups. If people are seriously interested in learning more about homeschooling, I'd like for them to not stop me in the middle of the supermarket to chat about it.

It's likely he didn't think you are an ignoramus at all. He might be just tired of discussing homeschooling with strangers every time he leaves the house.
What exactly is 'doing grades'? I don't feel that I 'do grades' but I do buy materials and when I buy them, they are organised generally according to grade levels. I sign my children up for classes, and they too are organised according to age or grade levels. As far as I'm concerned, it's simply an organisational thing. If a class advertises itself as for K-2 or age 5-8, it makes no difference to me. Dd knows she's a kindergartener, and if someone asked her, that's what she'd say. She also knows that she's homeschooled, and would say that if anyone asked what school she goes to.

I too rejected PS largely because of the organisation of grades. My dd needs to do math at a second or third grade level and English probably with fifth graders, but also needs to play shop and jump-rope with kindergarteners. However, to throw her in with fifth grade aged kids to read books would be hugely inappropriate for her socially, and there was no school that was going to meet her needs. I don't think that multi-aged classes fit all children, no matter how asynchronous their development. My child would keel over at having to interact with fifth graders. The thought makes me :

However, I still consider her a kindergartener, even though she had mastered the K curriculum two years ago. That's what she is, in my eyes, for organisational purposes.

I don't see why anyone would ask me what grade I"m in, because ordinarily people over the age of 18 don't go to grade school. However, if someone asks me if I have kids, or where I work, or what country I come from, or where I bought my baby carrier, or how many ounces of formula my baby eats, or even if he sleeps through the night, I answer them without finding it irritating, even if I've heard the question a thousand times before. I guess it just doesn't irritate me to answer small talk the way it does some people.


I don't think that being receptive and welcoming to questions requires me to be a cheerleader for any cause. However, I do feel passionate about many of my choices, and if I get the chance to pass on just a little of that to someone I meet, that's a good thing imo.

I do my own research and homework on just about every aspect of my parenting. I don't expect anyone to babysit me, but I have to say that I have been profoundly grateful to those who took the time to answer my questions about homeschooling as I made that decision. I like to think that I can pay that debt forward and be open to others who need help in the future.

To me, it's rather like saying that you won't give money to panhandlers, because some of them are scamming. Maybe of every hundred, a few are probably scamming. But should we treat every one like a scammer? I'd rather know that I gave when I could, and accept that some of my $$s may be 'wasted'. In the same way, I'd rather take time to answer people about homeschooling with patience (both outwardly and inwardly) and accept that some may receive the information with a negative mind. That's their choice - and it feels better to me to welcome questions with an open heart and mind than to allow myself to feel irritated by them.
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#87 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 05:13 AM
 
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What exactly is 'doing grades'? I don't feel that I 'do grades' but I do buy materials and when I buy them, they are organised generally according to grade levels. I sign my children up for classes, and they too are organised according to age or grade levels.
I would say that my kids don't 'do grades,' and, for what it's worth, we don't really do any of the things that you describe. I purposely keep my kids out of age-levelled environments (because they're generally a terrible fit); they don't do 'classes' in anything other than the arts and we don't really do curriculum, at least not in a conventionally grade-levelled sequential way.

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As far as I'm concerned, it's simply an organisational thing. ...
Organization of what, though? For you maybe there's some organizational utility. For us, no -- not of curriculum, nor of classes, nor of social contacts.

Again, I'm not saying it provokes me to anger or annoyance to be asked such a question. It's just that explaining why I can't give a simple answer takes a fair bit of energy ... or else I have to engage in telling what feels to me like a white lie. What truth is there in saying "She's in seventh grade," when she isn't in a 7th grade classroom, does no 7th grade work, has no 7th-grade level skills, takes no classes with 7th-graders and has no 7th-grade-age friends?

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#88 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 11:18 AM
 
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#89 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 11:28 AM
 
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DS: I'm not in any grade; I'm homeschooled.
Person: Oh, but what grade would you be in if you were in school?
Mama: What military rank are you?
Person: I'm not in the military.
Mama: But what rank would you be if you WERE in the military?

:roflmao: Must remember.
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#90 of 105 Old 12-27-2006, 11:31 AM
 
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We're preparing them for life at a desk, in a cube (classroom), doing work that someone else deems important (curriculum), and being rewarded in the form of a paycheck (grades).

IMNSHO.
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