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Were you home schooled and how do you feel about it?

2K views 31 replies 28 participants last post by  Stayseeliz 
#1 ·
We are new to homeschooling, and this question has been on my mind. Recently two friends who were homeschooled have spoken negatively on their experience being home schooled, although both either plan to or have homeschooled their own children for a time. One friend's parents were very rigid and strict, and the other felt she didn't have her social needs met as a home schooled teenager.

So are there any homeschooled mamas out there? What did you like/not like about it? How does your experience influence how you plan or value your own children's education?
 
#2 ·
I wasn't homeschooled, and my children are still not school age, so I'm not sure how welcome my response will be.....but I have thought about this myself and wanted to chime in. Forgive me if my response is not welcome and I'll edit it.


The homeschooling community has changed SO much since any of us were school-aged! How many opportunities do you think there were for homeschooling families in the 80's/90's compared to today? I'm positive that the peer social opportunities couldn't have been as plentiful.

The second thought I have is that, regardless of whether a child is homeschooled or institutionally-schooled, parents are how they are. A child with strict parents is going to have strict parents whether they attend school or stay home. Attending school might give them a break from their parents' rule, but it could potentially make life outside of school hours even more restrictive. Or maybe not, I admit to being far from an expert.


To the point, I think the parents that post on MDC are attentive to their children's needs. I'm not sure you are going to find the type of rigid/strict parents here that you might find in other communities.

I wish I could add my own experience as a homeschooled individual so that I could really answer your questions, but I wasn't fortunate enough to live that life. (And please, do let me know if you would like my response deleted.)
 
#3 ·
It's a forum for discussion, right? *Jessica*, I totally appreciate your response.
My friend who says the social life was lacking in her homeschool experience is 19, so that's not too far off in terms of time. I do agree that things have changed immensely since the 90's.
I guess what I am looking for are success or happy stories from people who were homeschooled, to counter what I'd heard that was negative, kwim?
 
#4 ·
Homeschooling has grown by leaps and bounds in recent years, so it's a little difficult to find too many grown homeschoolers. They're out there, but they're spread much thinner than the younger ones.

I do have links to several articles written by grown homeschoolers (mostly unschoolers), however, and that might give you a taste of what you're looking for. I'm sure there are tons more articles out there, but I've only really ever searched specifically for unschoolers.

Laurie Chancey's articles
Homeschooling: It's a Wonderful Life by Lillian and family
Home Girl by Britta Reida
Full Circle by Lara Kehler
Prism article by Sean Sullivan

Also, try searching for articles written by Peter Kowalke. It looks as though he's taken most of them off his own site for a few months, but other sites still house some of his writings. Try searching Home Education Magazine's site, or Life Learning's, for starters.

Also, Peter produced a documentary about adult homeschoolers entitled Grown Without Schooling. There's a Radio Free School episode that featuers Peter talking about the video.

I'm sure there are lots more out there, but I can't think of any at the moment. If I come up with anything else, though, I'll add it in.

HTH!
 
#5 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by LeAnnie View Post
I guess what I am looking for are success or happy stories from people who were homeschooled, to counter what I'd heard that was negative, kwim?
Not quite grown, and not a mom, but my 16 y/o ds has this to say:

"I think it's a lot of fun--we have way more freedom than kids who are in school. I have more time to think creatively and time to BE creative and follow through with my ideas. There's plenty of time to socialize...or not--if you don't feel like being with a bunch of people, you don't have to be, but if you want to get together with friends, you can. I think kids in school miss out on a lot. They only get exposed to what the teacher says is important rather than hearing ideas from a lot of different people. I'd definately homeschool my kids."
 
#7 ·
I was homeschooled! I think it was very beneficial and am thankful my parents chose to do that for me. I am excited about HSing my own kids and cant wait till they get a bit older.
I haven't written down all my thoughts on the topic, and dont have much time right now, but I saw this on the main page and just thought I'd give you my thumbs up! Like most other things, HSing is what the parents make it, also, how many people do you know that hated public high school or middle school - uh, most people you talk to, lol! PM me if you want to chat more.
 
#8 ·
One year when I was living in South America, my parents couldn't get me into school for one reason or another. I was 13. It was the best year of my life. It was new enough living there but not being in school was incredible freedom to do my own thing.

I got real good at designing clothes for my paper dolls. I got to see "life as it really was". People working, my dad working, poor people (kids) making a living on the streets of La Paz, the witch markets, people carrying sids of beef on their backs....

My mom would spend her days in the park sketching the Indian women with the babies on their backs, plenier painting, food shopping and being a mom to us. We would wonder about the town going to their funny little zoo or taking taxi's here and there. We would bring snacks to my dad and his workers (construction). They wanted us to experience as much of the "ways of the people" so we saw a lot of football (soccer), ate strange foods went to neighboring towns. My dad had lived there a year before us and had great love and trust of the people of Bolivia.

I have to say the learning was intense, it was real and I remember it really shaping me in who I am and the decisions I make today. I unschool my kids with the same fervor and I have to say it's the best decision we ever made.
 
#10 ·
i was not home schooled but a while back i found some forums online for adults who had been home schooled and i browsed what people had posted. i was looking for lots of different views and opinions not all just good things but also bad things and i found them. this was a few years ago and i lost my bookmarks so i don't have the urls anymore. one thing i found was that people who felt they where forced to be home schooled often seemed to resent it. some people blamed a lot of problems on having been home schooled but the same sorts of problems that i have friends blame on having gone to public school or private school or they blame it on anything. like "i'm not good at math because i was home schooled" or "i'm not good at math because i went to public school" or "i have social problems for blahblahbah" you get the picture. the people who seemed to have had the best experiences where the ones who came from more relaxed home school environments. some had gone to school some years and home schooled other years and where allowed to decide. a lot of the ones that loved it had been un schooled. some where in my mind not really home schooled but abused and blamed the abuse on having been home schooled and it was really sad to read there stories. the conclusion i came to was that home schooling can be great especially in homes where children are treated with respect and grow up feeling loved and safe i guess any kid that grows up feeling respected loved and safe is going to do a lot better regardless of their education though.
 
#11 ·
I was homeschooled 5th-7th grades. I loved it and those are definately the best times to be homeschooled if you ask me! I want to homeschool my children as well. I loved being able to read for hours if I wanted to and follow my interests as they led me.
 
#12 ·
Hi -- I was homeschooled from 3rd grade through 12th. I am 34 years old so this was a little ways back there!
I always said I would not homeschool my children. However, now that I have children, I couldn't possibly send them away to school. My oldest is in the 2nd grade this year.

I find that homeschooling is so so so so different today than what it was when I was a kid. We belong to a co op that has over 60 kids in it ranging from Kindergarten through 8th grade. So my children have friends which is not something I had. My children don't feel like the odd ones which is something I felt. My children are included in things and are part of groups which is not something I ever achieved. I just always felt like the very odd and different child when around my peers.

I think just knowing what bothered me about being homeschooled will help me to alleviate that problem in the process of homeschooling my children.

Right now I'm loving the fact that they don't have to get up early and rush out the door every morning. They can learn at their own speed. They can play most of the day. They learn about the world by being in it instead of being locked away in a school. There are so many learning moments in life if you just look around.

Gotta run but hope that was somewhat helpful! Kellie
 
#13 ·
my great friend jodee, that i met through my homeschool group was homeschooled. we were just talking about it the other day. she still is really close to her mom, she's totally normal crazy fun, and said it was a great experience. she's now homeschooling her daughter and that's how we became friends. she did say she was socially active, but the thing she liked most was that her mother enjoyed teaching her and made learning an enjoyable experience. i thought that was really key so i know *i* wasn't homeschooled but i thought jodee's experience and comments belonged here. hope that helps even though it's 3rd person
 
#15 ·
I was homeschooled from forth grade through high school. I loved it. I graduated at age 16. It was very enjoyable, even though my Mom was very strict schedule wise. Following my graduation, I begun a full time job, worked my way up to supervisor in a very short time. I then went to college and maintained a GPA of 3.7. Met my husband in college, got married, and had my first child at 19.

I am very pleased with how my life has worked out. I now have six children that I am currently homeschooling and I would never consider sending them away to any other school. I not only survived homeschooling, but thrived and have lived such a wonderful life, much because of the fact that I was homeschooled and the values and lessons that I learned during that time in my life. I am very grateful that my parents decided to homeschool me.
 
#18 ·
I had a pretty miserable time in public school, and I think I would have been happier and mentally healthier if I could have been homeschooled in elementary and jr high schools. I didn't "blossom" until I went to high school.
 
#19 ·
I was homeschooled. My parents will tell you it was great, and I am fine with no issues. I'm not. I rarely got to be around other kids form about age 9-18. It was awful. I still don't know how to make friends.

Up til around 9-10, it was good.

I stopped doing schoolwork around age 16. I finally finished all my highschool courses thru an adult education program thru the local college when I was 19. It was so hard-I had no clue how to take notes or anything, and my teachers always got after me cause I didn't have any idea how to work with others in labs, and I always sat by myself in the cafeteria. .

That being said, if you make sure your child had firends & is socailized properly, it can be good. And after say age 10, if they are tellinbg you they hate it & it's not working for them listen!!

I actually hope to homeschool Rachel, for as long as works for both of us.
 
#20 ·
I wasn't homeschooled, but when I was in highschool (in the early 90s) and I heard about homeschooling, I desperately wished I could do that because I wasn't learning enough at school to keep it interesting. My mom wasn't really up to it though, so I continued public school.

To the OP, it's always a good idea to get lots of information when you're making a decision...but you shouldn't be worried because some people had a bad experience being homeschooled. The majority, it seems were really glad they were homeschooled, which is WAY more than you can say for public school.

If you started another thread asking people if they liked going to public school, it would be switched and the majority would say, "I hated my school experience."
(And by the way, I hated going to public school most of the time.)
 
#23 ·
i was homeschooled from 6th grade on. there are so many factors that contribute to each individual experience but after talking to a lot of my homeschooled friends and my six siblings, we all agree that the most important ingredient to a successful and joyful experience is the consistant enthusiasm for learning shown by the parents. when my mom was excited to learn with us, when she was relaxed and not trying to make us conform to some standard, homeschooling was great fun and very enjoyable. my most precious memories come from these years. when she became wrapped up in her lists of things we were supposed to know and didn't and frustrated with a lack of progress in one area or another, things began to snowball and that spark and joy were lost... and so were we. eventually, after a really hard year of my sister being seriously ill, my mother put all my siblings back into public school. some survived it and some didn't. i was in college at this point so it didn't affect me directly, but from a homeschooled kid's standpoint, i would strongly encourage any parents who might consider putting their homeschooled kids back into public school at some point to MAKE SURE they are, to some degree, socialized in the same manner as public school kids. there is a very specific set of social skills required of children schooled in a rigid way in the company of other children their own age and without these skills, homeschoolers may find it difficult to adapt, especially if they are of a sensitive nature. of course there will be those kids who would have no trouble at all... my family was a mix. i never felt lonely or without friends, nor did i feel at any disadvantage in college socially or otherwise. i do wish i'd had a broader education - my parents were strict and very religious and viewpoints other than theirs were never discussed.

as for me, i plan on unschooling my boys (aged 3, 3 and 1) and can't imagine ever sending them to a regular school.
 
#25 ·
I was homeschooled from 7th grade on. I enjoyed public/private school but I got into so much trouble that my mom pulled me out. My brother and sister were also homeschooled because of really bad public/private school experiences.

Homeschooling was good for me, but it doesn't work for everyone. I have grown adult friends who were homeschooled and hated it. But I also know plenty of public/private school kids who hate that....lol. Kids hate a lot of things


I enjoyed being homeschooled (unschooled) and wouldn't go back to change anything at all. I now home school my 5 year old and 9 year old, neither ever asks to "go to school". If they start asking it will be something to consider. I want them to be happy.

So of course there are good and bad home school experiences, just as there are good and bad public school experiences, private school experiences, etc. Plenty of people hated their public school experiences!

To me, it's kinda of a funny question if you think about it....do you ask people about their public school experiences if your considering public school or do you just make the decision you think is best for your child? Make sense?
 
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